Then I got this scar sneaking under the door of a pay toilet

[thorne_scratch]

Yesterday in a stunning display of grace, athleticism, hand-eye coordination, and good old fashioned boneritis, I somehow managed to hit myself directly in the face with a grocery hand basket. (Fortunately, most of the groceries were out of it at the time.) I can't even explain how I did it; I don't think the three other people in line with me

Comments

[velithya]

People keep making faces about peeing in pools and I am just like "...man, you have never been a serious swimmer, have you."

[thorne_scratch]

I know, right? Seriously, get over it, people.

Actually, that's long been a question I've meant to ask the xkcd question blog-- that if a normal and healthy Olympic swimmer (let's call him I. Thorpe-- no, too obvious. We'll call him Ian T.) pees into a standard Olympic sized pool twice a day, what is the actual proportion of urine to water. And then I would hammer people who get all shirty with me with the miniscule number.

[velithya]

I wrote a reply comment last night and then instead of posting it livejournal ate it :( THANKS LJ

I think I made some kind of comment about it was even better when you were cold, because they you could make your own warm spot, guaranteed to make other commenters look at me funny (LOOK, after they turn the winter pool heating off but before it gets really hot outside the water is COLD okay :< these are not generally indoor pools).

And that pool water is filtered and tested every day, and also that urine is sterile so what is their problem.

[thorne_scratch]

LJ was jealous of how cool your comment was, clearly.

Oh God, yeah. I remember so many early morning practices when it was freezing, and dealing with that.

[milliebee]

Opposite to velithya, I think the only part of this that I did find gross was the concept of peeing/crapping in a pool. I can't imagine going through such a lengthy bathroom ritual, though. I'd go insane.

Hey, maybe it was a dark wizard that caused that scar. If neither you or anyone else can explain how you hit yourself with a shopping basket, it's safe to assume someone used the imperious curse on you.

[thorne_scratch]

I would not NORMALLY crap in a pool, as that's an emergency thing only, but peeing, yeah. It's seriously minimally not a thing? You're probably coming into more contact with urine just by touching a bathroom doorknob than you are in a pool, honestly.

If so, I wonder why they were in the Safeway at 11:00 pm. You'd think they'd have better things to do.

[thebaconfat]

Oh my gosh, that bathroom ritual. I don't get the poop stigma either, or people who think it's super gross when someone craps in a public bathroom. Lady, I'm not going to hold it in all day just to protect your delicate nostrils from a bit of stink.

Your home-buying post also made me really want to go to open houses just to snoop on people's lives. We're only a few days into December and I already feel like you've expanded my knowledge of the human condition. And I learned about Poo-Pourri.

[thorne_scratch]

I know. EVERYONE POOPS. WE HAVE A BOOK BASICALLY ALL ABOUT THAT FACT. Just accept it,and move on. It should not rule your life!

You should, they're kind of fun. Also, they often smell like cookies. Tonight I'm probably going to write about hippos, but if you manage to learn about the human condition during it, well, I'VE DONE MY JOB. Heh.

...you guys should buy a house! I can advise. Terribly.

[velithya]

the poo-purri commercial is a thing of beauty.

[thebaconfat]

I JUST LOOKED IT UP AND IT WAS AMAZING