(Untitled)

[hasfearitude]

This place is disgusting.

Where's my mop?

Comments

[rentsdownstairs]

What does it look like?

[hasfearitude]

Were you hit on the head as a small child?

[rentsdownstairs]

I'm not sure. I seem to remember an incident when I was about two, when I was out in the garden trying to capture the essence of a kitten that had found its way through the gate in a painting done entirely in jam and bits of dry pasta. Suddenly, the kitten leapt at me and knocked me back into the shed, where I was buried alive in old sports equipment until my mother came home and heard me whimpering, seeing only one tiny hand protruding from under a moulding cricket bat.

Oh, and you still didn't tell me what that mop you're looking for looks like.

[hasfearitude]

That's funny -- the exact same thing happened to me once, only I was thirty and I killed and stuffed the kitten. And it wasn't a kitten, but a squirrel. And there was no cricket bat.

It looks like a mop. Should be in a bucket.