LJ Idol Season 9, Week 27: Open Topic (The Proposal)

[theun4givables]

Savin stood off to the side, his feet aching and eyelids drooping, unwilling to stay open. He watched as Jazz strode forward, hands half-balled into fists at his sides, chin raised in a display of confidence that seemed so unlike him, jaw set and eyes focused on the crowd in front.

The same crowd waiting for their newest Emperor to be crowned.

Comments

[n3m3sis43]

This is something happy. I mean, how would it not be? XD

[theun4givables]

Because -- I don't know. xD It's just so not my usual, hah.

[adoptedwriter]

Yay! AW

[theun4givables]

Yay, indeed. :D I love these two when they're happy.

[i_17bingo]

Emperor. The word tumbled around in Savin’s mind, trying to stick to something and finding that it had no grip.

Ooh! Nicely put!

“I have another announcement to make,” Jazz said quietly, slipping his hand inside his pocket. “Actually, it’s more of a question...”

Oh, crap, I see where this is going.

Look, Jazz, this was a dick move. I don't think you, nor Mari, nor anyone else has a right to be pissed off about how you put him on the spot like this without regard for his feelings. You think you're embarrassed and awkward? Imagine how he feels.

To be fair, public proposals unsettle me, like, a lot (unless there's been some discussion on the topic between the couple), so I have strong opinions on the subject.

[theun4givables]

Oh, it was a total dick move on Jazz's part. Jazz at least realized this at the end. ;) He can occasionally be impulsive and self-centered, and he was only thinking of how he'd feel being proposed in such a situation (which was he'd find it incredibly romantic, whereas Savin obviously felt otherwise).

Public proposals unsettle me, too, but I know there are some people who are into them a lot (Jazz is, apparently, one of them). I'm just glad Jazz apologized at the end and realized why what he did wasn't the best move. :)

[dmousey]

Mitchel Foraker.... that Magnificent Bastard... ;)

[theun4givables]

Oh, Mother Dearest, you have no idea.

Mel would be proud to have such a Magnificent Bastard named after her. <3

[dmousey]

Yes, she truly would've been! She would've been proud of you for everything you've accomplished this past year also. She was your biggest fan, as I am. Loves you <3

[fodschwazzle]

I really like how sections slid into each other. It seemed a really natural way to cut the story together, jumping forward in time to the next relevant time a similar thought weighed Savin's mind down. I would like to try that style of creating forward momentum. On top of that, every character has a bit of nuance. Even Amelia has a fascinating, business-like emotional investment in the success of the romance.

[theun4givables]

Thank you! Scene transitions and I are not friends, so I have been trying to work on that.

Amelia is starting to come into her own; she was created as a one-off character in a fanfic I wrote for this 'verse (post-the-books kind of fic that indulges a never-will-be-canon pairing I like), but she came to me with a name. And if they come to me WITH a name, they stick around. I guess she really just likes Savin, because I KNOW she went and got him without being told to, hah.

For me, it means a hell of a lot to hear that each character has their own nuance. It means I'm doing my job in making them different people. <3