LJ Idol Season 9, Week 11: Recency Bias

[theun4givables]

Stephanie glanced at her phone, frowning as it buzzed on her desk. The name Jeff stood out on the screen, causing her heart to quicken in her chest. What the hell could he possibly want now? After their “discussion” that morning, she would easily go the whole day without speaking to him again

Comments

[dmousey]

This is a riveting read. It gives me sad face, :( , it has a superb sense of realism. The dialogue and emotions are believable, and the reader is completely drawn into the tension. Well done.

Hugs:)

[theun4givables]

Thanks. :) I keep looking at the length of this and going oh God, it's long until I reread it, and then it feels fairly short. I'm glad that it rang true, and that the tension immediately draws one in. <3

*hugs back*

[alien_writings]

This felt very real, with Jeff's terrible, mind-twisting behavior seeming all too plausible. It didn't feel too long, either, even if it was a lot of words.

You did a good job with this.

[theun4givables]

"Jeff's terrible, mind-twisting behavior seeming all too plausible."

That's because 95% of his dialogue is comprised of things Evelyn has said to me. =/ And yay for it not feeling too long! I was worried about that. :)

Thanks. <3

[teenagewitch]

Wow that was intense. Really good but intense.

[theun4givables]

Thank you. :) I'm glad the intensity came through.

[beeker121]

This rang true in sad ways. I want to commiserate with (or slap) your characters which shows how much life you brought to them.

[theun4givables]

I'm glad that this rang true and that you could commiserate (and want to slap) my characters. :) Like you said, it certainly does show just how "lifelike" they really are. :)

[catwomon]

Wow! That is a good, well-written piece. I was tense and scared reading it.

[theun4givables]

Thank you. <3

I'm glad that the tension came through.