Last night I had to put LG to bed crying. He NEVER does that. He always goes to bed happy and last night he wanted a cookie, so I said, ok...let's quit messing around and put your jammies on and you can have a cookie. Of course 30 minutes later of him fighting me to put his jammies on he didn't get a cookie. He was SO pissed at me.
Some kids definitely have wilder tempers than other, and my siblings and I were all pretty subdued. But thinking of other kids in my family, I might be at risk of having a wilder one!
i knew before ben was born that he'd be like this. i had a nasty temper while i was pregnant that i'd never had before. it was majorly weird, because i spent my whole life just crying when i was mad, and suddenly i had the strength to stand up for myself and snark back. :-)
- give choices whenever possible - explain with if/then statements - let him know the game plan for the day, and that a lot of it depends on him - find a few things that comfort him and ask him if he'd like you to do those things when he's having a tantrum - speak quietly so he has to struggle to hear you when he's screaming (do it in his ear)
I'll share more when I can remember them. Sometimes these work for Sophie, sometimes they don't. It all depends on her mood. I go through my arsenal of tricks and if, at the bottom of my bag, she is still crying and screaming, I just pick her up and hold her (if I'm not cooking dinner). Sometimes that's all she needs.
Out of all the things listed, I seriously think it's the agenda that works best for Sophie. It helps us get her to sleep at nap//night without tears and will often help us calm her down when she's throwing a tantrum.
Of course, that means I have to have a plan and actually stick to it, or have an alternative lined up. It's a challenge for me most days, but it's a healthy challenge. :D
Oh yeah, I remember those 'whatever works' days. There was one time when Holden was 2 or 3 that he refused to eat, dumped ravioli all over the kitchen floor and decided to wade around in it rather than eat it. And I let him for a few minutes because that was like the tenth tantrum of the day and I was losing my damn mind.
It really does get easier. But those days are so nightmarish.
Ooh, I think my favorite was when he decided to play "lets put an open go-gurt tube in each hand and SPIN AROUND REALLY REALLY FAST while mommy is working." I am still finding splotches of that crap in weird places a couple years later.
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besides, he finally ate. mmm. beef jerky and crackers. yum yum.
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*hugs* Tomorrow will be better (probably) :-)
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seriously, screaming in stereo? i would not want to be you, even for 15 seconds.
and actually, we're doing better. wonder pets came on the tv and it calmed him down and distracted him enough to eat something.
i really do want a shower though, but i'm very very afraid. :-)
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Some things I've found that work:
- give choices whenever possible
- explain with if/then statements
- let him know the game plan for the day, and that a lot of it depends on him
- find a few things that comfort him and ask him if he'd like you to do those things when he's having a tantrum
- speak quietly so he has to struggle to hear you when he's screaming (do it in his ear)
I'll share more when I can remember them. Sometimes these work for Sophie, sometimes they don't. It all depends on her mood. I go through my arsenal of tricks and if, at the bottom of my bag, she is still crying and screaming, I just pick her up and hold her (if I'm not cooking dinner). Sometimes that's all she needs.
Good luck! :D
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yup
- explain with if/then statements
i use when/then. when you turn the light on, then mama will get up.
- let him know the game plan for the day, and that a lot of it depends on him
lol. that would imply that I know the plan for the day ( ... )
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Of course, that means I have to have a plan and actually stick to it, or have an alternative lined up. It's a challenge for me most days, but it's a healthy challenge. :D
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It really does get easier. But those days are so nightmarish.
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i gave in and am cooking two hot dogs because i can't bring him to MIL's unfed.
this had better not become the norm though ...
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