fic: We Need to Talk
Title: We Need to Talk
Author Name: indiefairy
Original Prompt Number: 112
Pairing(s): Jack/Ianto mentions of Gwen/Rhys
Summary: When Jack left, Ianto decided that if he ever came back things would be different. Jack wouldn't be the one to set the terms of their relationship. But where Jack is involved nothing is ever easy.
Rating: NC17 (liberal use of bad language and scenes of an adult nature)
Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood I'm just playing in the sandpit.
Warnings: None
Word Count: 4698
Author's Notes: This fic is based around the events of episodes 2x01, 2x02 and 2x03. A huge thank you to my wonderful beta C, couldn't have written this without you hun.
When Jack left, Ianto decided that if he ever came back things would be different. Jack wouldn't be the one to set the terms of their relationship, he would. He'd no longer give in to Jack's sexual whims, whenever and wherever. They'd do things on his terms. He'd no longer be a fuck toy. And if Jack wouldn't play it his way, then whatever it was they were doing would have to end, completely. It wasn't healthy.
This plan was all well and good, whilst Ianto could sit and think about it in the Hub after hours, when Gwen, Tosh and Owen had gone home, and it was just him, the whirring of the computers and the occasional rustling from Myfanwy.
Ianto could play scenarios over in his head; carry out both sides of conversations that probably would never happen, but that he wanted to take place. He thought about Jack everyday of his absence, and after three months of giving it a lot of thought and planning - no that was a lie the first month of Jack's absence Ianto had just skated by, day by day, hoping that none of the others would notice how totally and completely lost he was without Jack. - Ianto had formulated a plan, a plan that worked around any variable Jack might throw into the mix upon his return.
The one variable Ianto hadn't factored in however, was how seeing Jack again would affect him. Sure he'd thought about what his reaction would be, he'd worked out at least fifty variations of how their first meeting would go. But he hadn't countered on the palpitations, the longing and the need.
All it took was hearing his voice and seeing that damned smile, and Ianto's plan was thrown off course. Damn Harkness.
He'd promised himself that he wouldn't show his feelings, wouldn't let Jack see how much he'd missed him or how glad he was that he was back. But he had to ruin it the first time he opened his mouth are you going back to him? he hadn't wanted to ask the question, hadn't wanted to know, but by asking the question he showed Jack everything he didn't want to show him, and he could kick himself for it. So much for being aloof. At least he'd managed to restrain himself by not letting Jack see how happy his answer had made him. Because Ianto had to admit despite himself, that, that answer, and Jack's bare openness in giving it, had given him the smallest glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe Jack didn't regard him and what they had together the way he'd thought he had. And in Ianto's grand scheme of things, that was no good at all.
Jealousy; that was the next mistake Ianto had made. He hadn't meant for his question towards John Hart to come across like that, but dammit he was jealous, and he had let Jack and John know he was. Things really weren't going to plan.
At least John being there had its benefits; it gave them all a distraction. An annoying, potentially dangerous distraction, but a distraction none the less. Just as long as he and Jack didn't have to be alone together any time soon.
That's it, Gwen was going to get the instant coffee treatment.
He knew why she'd done it, and her heart was in the right place, but he'd much rather have been teamed up with Tosh, or even Owen, hell he'd rather of been teamed up with John Hart than Jack. So much for keeping a respectable distance.
The car journey to the offices was, uncomfortable to say the least. Jack had tried to make small talk, flirted a little, and just generally babbled the entire journey. Ianto had spent the journey gripping the wheel tight, his focus dead ahead, and his mind on anything and everything. It worked reasonably well in keeping his mind off the man set next to him, and also reminded him that he'd used the last of the milk this morning, he'd have to pick some up before he went home.
Was now a good time to have the conversation he'd been planning for months? Look Jack I know we're currently on a mission, searching for dangerous canisters for your potentially psychopathic ex. But what exactly is going on between us?, So do you walk out on all your partners without an explanation?, Am I just a fuck toy to you?, Would you just fuck me already?
Ianto had to take a deep breath. Now really wasn't the time, and his brain really wasn't functioning well enough. Jack was so close to him though, the car was filled with his wonderful scent, 51st century pheromones indeed. And he hadn't had any intimate human contact for so long. Flexing his fingers on the steering wheel Ianto cast a furtive glance at Jack, he was still talking away, the words all jumbled noise in Ianto's head, and he was smiling, though Ianto knew that the smile was just a front.
Jack wasn't as good at hiding his emotions as he liked to believe. It was his eyes that gave him away every time, he could plaster on the biggest smile in the world, laugh and joke with the rest of them, but Ianto could always tell if Jack wasn't really in the moment. The others often missed it, But Ianto never did.
Well Ianto liked to tell himself that he never did. Truth was, when it mattered, when it really mattered. It was as though he couldn't read Jack at all. And that always happened when it was to do with him, with them.
It was frustrating. Ianto prided himself on his ability to read people, to read Jack. But when it came to them, he really didn't know what was going on.
Ianto longed for the day when Jack really was an open book to him.
Ianto's frustrating mix of thoughts came to an abrupt halt as they reached their destination. The tall office building loomed up into the darkness in front of them, and Ianto silently thanked Tosh for the scanner he had in his pocket. Without it they'd have to search every single floor. With it their search field would be dramatically reduced. Well that was the hope anyway.
The car ride had been awkward, but that was nothing compared to the ride up to the top floor in the lift. Ianto kept his focus on the scanner, and kept to the other side of the lift to Jack.
Jack had a thing about lifts, they were a confined space, they generally had mirrors, and there was only a short amount of time to get up to any mischief. Jack often liked to see what they could get up to before the lift doors opened. Which had led to numerous embarrassing situations, and had them kicked out of two hotels in Cardiff.
Thankfully, Jack seemed to have gotten the hint, he stayed to his side of the lift, his conversation was professional, though a little strange, and the ride went without incident.
Ianto exited the lift with his work head firmly screwed on; they were here to find a canister. Everything else could wait until John Hart was out of their lives.
The mood seemed to change considerably once they stepped foot into the offices, Jack was nervous, he was hiding it under a flirtatious bravado, but he was definitely nervous about something. Ianto pondered whether Jack had been nervous the entire trip here; it would have been easy to miss, owing to the fact that he was so distracted with his own confusing thoughts.
Jack made a crack about photocopiers, but Ianto ignored it, they were here to find a canister, and find a canister they were going to do. That and he wasn't quite ready to play along with Jack just yet. He couldn't even bring himself to look at Jack properly, lest he ruin his whole plan.
His manner seemed to subdue Jack, and the joking nervousness, ebbed away to be replaced by soft concern.
”How are you Ianto?” It was such a simple question, asked with concern, and Ianto had so many replies. Months of built up anger, resentment, longing and need could come spilling out with any reply that he might give. Now would be the perfect time to let Jack know exactly how he felt. Tell him all the things that he'd been preparing to say, to settle things between them, or at least get some idea of what was going on. Yet Ianto couldn't bring himself to start it.
His reply was a lie, having Jack back hadn't made things better, they'd made things ten times worse. He tried to distract himself, a half hearted attempt at looking around the room. Anything to keep away from the conversation he wasn't prepared to have yet.
If only he could find the canister then they could be out of... his mind must have been playing tricks on him, Jack surely didn't just ask him out on a date did he? Oh fuck he did. Now that really was unexpected.
Jack had just got the upper hand in the game they were playing. The game that only Ianto knew they were playing. That wasn't fair at all.
Shit!
Ianto had been caught off guard; maybe he did mean more to Jack than he'd thought. What if that nervously asked question, was the answer that he had been longing to hear?
Too stunned and taken aback, Ianto just about managed to make a crack about the date not being in an office. Which, in his shocked and confused mind was probably his way of saying yes; he hoped Jack had caught that, before he'd moved the conversation topic back on to the job at hand. Sending Jack up to the rooftop so that he could have some space to breathe and re-master his plan of action.
Before he could do that though, he let his insecurities show again by bringing John Hart back into the conversation. Jack obviously wasn't that thrilled about him being there. But Ianto needed to know, why they were helping him. Needed to know if Jack wanted this man around, needed to know if he was in anyway a threat, and not just to their lives.
Jack wanted John Hart out of their lives. That was a good thing. Jack really had asked him out on a date, and he'd really said yes. He wasn't sure if that was a good or a bad thing just yet.
He didn't really have that much time to dwell on it though, because shortly after Jack had left to make his way up to the roof, John Hart arrived, and things went to hell.
John Hart was a devious bastard; he was a stupid one, but a devious bastard none the less, and because of John Hart and his stupid actions, the four of them now had to spend a night avoiding themselves.
It gave Ianto a headache just thinking about two Owen's and two Jack's running around, and he couldn't quite decide which one was worse, at least he wasn't going to great lengths to avoid the correct Owen. Although how he'd ended up with a beer in hand, sat on Owen's couch he really couldn't comprehend, except to say that it was the safe option, he really couldn't trust himself around Jack just yet, and he and Owen had become slightly friendlier towards each other since Jack's departure.
Besides, spending time with Gwen was out, as she was making use of a 'night off' by spending it with Rhys. Tosh was busy stealthily watching their counterparts running around Cardiff for scientific purposes, and he really didn't want to spend the time by himself.
“You surprise me.”
Ianto took a sidelong glance at Owen, “Pray tell, in what way do I surprise you?”
Owen took a swig of his beer, “Well, given that we've all got the night off for once, and Jack's back, I thought you'd be off shagging each other senseless. You two not made up yet?”
“Can we not talk about this, please?” Ianto looked at Owen with a look that said, 'if you mention this again I'm going to shoot you' or he would've had he not been so tired.
Owen just shrugged it off, “He wasn't exactly forthcoming about the details of where he's been all this time was he? He must have said something to you though.”
He's back and that's all that matters. Ianto didn't vocalise his thoughts, lest he get any wisecracking comment directed back at him, and he really was too tired to deal with any snarky comments about him and Jack. After all he and Owen had put all that behind them two months into Jack's absence, when Ianto had pulled a gun on him a second time, this time aiming for just above his head instead of his shoulder.
Deciding it was better just to ignore the question, Ianto made his way over to Owen's fridge getting out a couple more beers before flopping back onto the sofa. Owen took the hint and fired up his x-box, nothing like killing a load of computer generated aliens to pass the night away, and avoid any meaningful conversations.
-/-/-/-
Jack's return hadn't heralded much change, things pretty much got back to normal, as if he were never away. A couple of times they'd caught themselves falling into their 'absent Jack' ways though, Gwen leading the way and the rest getting on with it, without Jack's input. Which Ianto could see both annoyed Jack and saddened him. Ianto caught himself feeling happy that their ability to function without him, got to Jack. If he was going to up and leave them without warning or explanation, then he deserved to be left out in the cold now and then, on the other hand though, it served as a reminder that Jack had indeed left them, and it reminded Ianto how much he'd missed him, and all the confused feelings that came with having him gone, and now having him back.
They hadn't gone on their date yet, and Ianto still wasn't allowing himself to get too close to Jack, the others often served as unwitting distractions in this game. It wasn't that Ianto didn't want to get close to Jack, he just didn't want to ruin his rather jumbled plan of action, until he'd got it un-jumbled that is, and figured out exactly what the hell he was going to do, and how he was going to play it out.
Jack's first night back had proved that Ianto wasn't in any way prepared, and he really didn't want to let things fall back into the same routine that they'd had before Jack's departure.
Not that Ianto was completely aloof and cold from Jack's advances. Far from it. They danced around each other, Ianto would throw Jack a bone now and then, and claim it back before Jack could get to it. He wanted to see how far he could push Jack, wanted to see how much power he had over him, over them. They'd flirt, they'd joke. Ianto would build Jack up just enough, and then walk away. Letting Jack know that he wasn't just going to fall back into his arms.
Ianto had a plan after all, and it may not have been going exactly as he wanted it to, but he wasn't going to let it crash off the rails completely.
The case with Tommy however derailed the train completely.
Tosh had been harbouring a soft spot for Tommy since she started working for Torchwood. He'd seen it first hand shortly after he'd joined, and Jack had told him about the previous defrostings during Tosh's time at Torchwood. It was sweet; doomed, but sweet. And it made Tosh so very happy, that she didn't want to see that this wasn't exactly the healthiest of relationships.
Tommy would never age, but Tosh would. They had no way of knowing exactly when Tommy would be needed, and when they'd lose this once a year friend forever. Tosh could be long dead before that ever happened. And Tommy was very much a man out of his own time.
The similarities between Tosh's relationship with Tommy, and his with Jack were scary, and made watching Tosh and Tommy together even more bittersweet.
Jack couldn't die, he didn't age, well not at a regular rate anyway, and Jack didn't belong in this time, not truly. Sure he looked comfortable, looked happy. But this wasn't his time. Ianto wasn't even sure if Jack had a 'time' any more. Why be stuck in the 21st century, or the 51st, when you've travelled with the Doctor? And The Doctor was who Jack had left them for after all.
When the box opened and Tommy's fate was sealed that's when it all came crashing down. Tosh left to spend one last night with Tommy, and Ianto decided he really needed to talk things over with Jack. He really didn't want to lose him again, not without knowing.
'Would you miss me?' Ask a stupid question, get an honest answer.
Of course he'd miss him, he did miss him, and he needed Jack to know that. His answer was simply stated, and to the point. No point in pussy footing around it. He was direct and honest. He hadn't been prepared for Jack to be so honest though, and so open.
Jack had shared with Ianto in the past, whether it be work related stuff that none of the others knew about like Flat Holm, or more personal stuff, like where he actually came from. Although those pieces of information had tended to come after Ianto had already pieced most of it together.
He'd seen the unguarded side of Jack before, he supposed it helped that they were in a physical relationship together, but it generally took some gentle prodding before Jack opened up. The fact that Jack did so, so easily in this instance gave Ianto a flutter of hope.
And the flutter of hope pushed Ianto into taking the plunge. Before his brain even registered what he was doing, Ianto's lips were on Jack's, and it felt so good. In that instance Ianto thanked the Doctor for taking Jack away, for the mere fact that it meant that Jack could return to them, and a moment like this could happen.
The kiss spoke volumes. They both needed it, they both wanted it, and somehow it was more than they'd had before. This kiss was different. It was new. Perhaps it heralded a new beginning for them.
-/-/-/-
The bullet ripped through the air with aggression, piercing the centre of the target with a practised ease. Ianto hated himself for the fact that he had fallen back into Jack's bed so easily, a moment of insecurity and he'd offered himself up to Jack, just like old times.
At least he'd initiated it. He'd been the one to initiate the kiss, and he'd been the one leading Jack down to his bunk. It was a small victory at least. They still hadn't talked though. Ianto still had no clear idea of where he stood, and what this thing between them really was. Sure there was the promise of a date, but what exactly did that mean? And that's all it was, just a promise, no follow through. Not that he'd been making it all that easy for Jack to pin him down and set an actual date.
As Ianto steadied his gun, preparing for another shot, the hairs on the back of his neck prickled, and in one swift motion Ianto turned round and fired.
Jack flinched as a bullet embedded itself into the wall precisely two inches away from his head. Ianto's aim had improved, at least Jack hoped it had, and that Ianto hadn't actually been aiming for his head.
“You knew I was here.”
Ianto looked steadily at Jack, and slowly lowered his gun, “I always know.”
Jack let Ianto's statement hang in the air, before pushing himself away from the wall, “I thought I told you to go home.”
“I did.” Ianto motioned towards his attire, the jeans and long sleeve top definitely not what he was wearing earlier, “but home was cold and empty, and I needed some target practice.”
Jack took a step forward, barely letting Ianto finish what he was saying before he spoke. “You've changed.”
“We've all changed Jack, we had to.”
“I'm sorry I left.”
Ianto placed the gun down on the table next to him with a heavy clunk of metal on metal, “no you're not. If you had the choice over you'd do it exactly the same. You'd leave us all without a seconds thought. It almost broke us Jack.” It almost broke me
“It didn't though,” Jack smiled, though the smile was full of sadness, “you're a brilliant team, and you worked so much better together now.”
Ianto grimaced, “now yes. But at the beginning we were a mess, Owen and I almost killed each other, things almost fell apart between Gwen and Rhys, and poor Tosh was stuck in the middle of it all. We found ourselves suddenly leaderless, we blamed ourselves, we blamed each other, and we almost let it destroy us.”
Jack closed the gap between him and Ianto, pulling him towards him, “but you didn't, and you're all stronger for it.” Jack paused and let his hands drop from Ianto's sides, “what's this really all about?”
Ianto closed his eyes and took a deep breath, it was now or never.
“I know you don't love me, and I doubt you ever will.” Ianto pressed a light kiss on Jack's lips to stop him from interrupting, “and that's fine. But what are we doing here, Jack?”
Jack looked Ianto straight in the eyes, and placed a lazy hand on the Welshman's hip. “Honestly?”
“Honestly.”
“The honest answer is I don't know. You've gotten under my skin Ianto Jones. When you first joined I thought it would be interesting to see what could happen. You pushed so hard to become a member of my Torchwood, and then you acted so unattainable once you were in, and it drove me crazy.” Jack's thumb was drawing lazy circles on Ianto's hip, but his eye contact never wavered.
“Then you let things happen, and I was having fun, I thought we were both having fun, and then…”
Ianto broke eye contact “and then my half converted cyber-girlfriend almost killed everyone.”
“Which made me realise,” Jack touched Ianto's chin gently, drawing the younger man's head upwards, so that he'd look at him, “that I cared more for you than I thought I did, and I'd been ignoring it so much, that I didn't see that you were distancing yourself so much from the team, from me.”
“And now?” Ianto asked with a shaky breath.
“I spent a lot of time thinking about you whilst I was away. I care about you a lot Ianto, maybe it's the kind of love you don't think I'm capable of, and maybe it isn't. But I've taken you for granted and I want to change that. I want to go on dates with you, I want to stay over at your place, and I want you to know that you're more than just an easy fuck.”
Ianto let slip a smile despite himself, “I doubt you could say I was always easy, Jack.”
And there it was, that smile that lit up the room, that smile that actually reached Jack's eyes, “I don't suppose I...”
Jack's sentence came to an abrupt halt, as his lips were silenced by Ianto's.
A guttural moan muffled against Ianto's mouth as Jack kissed back, pulling Ianto flush against him. The moan was quickly replaced by a growl though, as Ianto pulled away from Jack severing contact.
“You know that's not exactly fair play.”
Ianto ran his hand down Jack's chest, his fingers lingering on each of the buttons of Jack's shirt, “I want to be with you, Jack, but I want it to be on an equal footing.”
Jack opened his mouth to speak, but thought better of it, instead he licked his lips in anticipation of what Ianto would do or say next.
Ianto's heart was racing, they were here in the moment. Weeks and weeks of planning, and now it was finally here. No turning back now.
Fuck it.
Ianto pushed Jack against the wall, locking lips with him in a furious kiss, tearing at his shirt, and pressing up against him, his own erection rubbing up against Jack's through far too many layers of clothing.
Was this really the way he had wanted things to go though? Sure they had talked a little bit. Jack had opened up a little, and they'd sort of come to an understanding about what exactly their relationship was all about. But Ianto couldn't help thinking that the groping and the fumbling about with belt buckles, and Jack's uncanny ability to have lube at hand at all times seemed to have interrupted the conversation, and sex this soon really hadn't been part of Ianto's plan. He'd had this idea that he'd tease Jack, flirt with him, kiss him, engage in a little groping and foreplay, maybe get a blowjob or two, and then finally when he knew Jack was near breaking point, fuck him senseless.
Well the rest of his plan hadn't exactly gone smoothly. What was wrong with one more little slip up? It wasn't as if he had much use for the plan any more anyway, and he was horny as hell.
It was cold in the firing range, underground tunnels not exactly being known for their central heating, but the cold had no effect on Ianto, as he prepared to enter Jack. One hand was intertwined with Jack's braced up against the wall, while the other was wrapped around his own slick cock, pumping it gently before nudging it up against Jack's prepared entrance. With a gruff moan escaping his own lips, and what he assumed must've been an alien swearword escaping from Jack's, Ianto entered Jack roughly. Hands gripping together tightly and knuckles scraping the bare brickwork.
Ianto quickly found a rhythm, one hand gripping tightly onto Jack's hip whilst the other, now no longer entwined with Jack's hand pumped Jack's cock in time.
Their moans echoed off the cavernous walls, giving their lovemaking a surround sound soundtrack, which spurred them on even more. Ianto made a mental note make more use of the firing range in the future.
Jack came first, spilling come, over the wall and Ianto's hand, a couple of quick thrusts later and Ianto spilled his seed inside of Jack. Sweaty and sated the two of them stayed where they were, Jack's head resting against the cool, hard brickwork, Ianto still deep inside him, his head resting against Jack's back.
They stayed like that for a couple of minutes, both trying to get their breath back, and unwilling to break the moment.
With a lot of effort Ianto untangled himself from Jack, doing his best to ignore the mess of clothes scattered about their feet, and the CCTV footage he'd have to deal with later. His hand lingered on Jack's hip, staying there even as Jack turned to face him, a devilish look on his face.
“If that's the kind of welcome back sex I get after coming back from the Doctor, I may have to go on more trips with him.”
“I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that.”
Jack pulled Ianto into a tight hug, “as long as my team need me, I won't abandon them again. I won't abandon you again.”
“Promise?”
Pulling away slightly Jack looked Ianto straight in the eyes, and kissed him softly, “I promise.”
Author Name: indiefairy
Original Prompt Number: 112
Pairing(s): Jack/Ianto mentions of Gwen/Rhys
Summary: When Jack left, Ianto decided that if he ever came back things would be different. Jack wouldn't be the one to set the terms of their relationship. But where Jack is involved nothing is ever easy.
Rating: NC17 (liberal use of bad language and scenes of an adult nature)
Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood I'm just playing in the sandpit.
Warnings: None
Word Count: 4698
Author's Notes: This fic is based around the events of episodes 2x01, 2x02 and 2x03. A huge thank you to my wonderful beta C, couldn't have written this without you hun.
When Jack left, Ianto decided that if he ever came back things would be different. Jack wouldn't be the one to set the terms of their relationship, he would. He'd no longer give in to Jack's sexual whims, whenever and wherever. They'd do things on his terms. He'd no longer be a fuck toy. And if Jack wouldn't play it his way, then whatever it was they were doing would have to end, completely. It wasn't healthy.
This plan was all well and good, whilst Ianto could sit and think about it in the Hub after hours, when Gwen, Tosh and Owen had gone home, and it was just him, the whirring of the computers and the occasional rustling from Myfanwy.
Ianto could play scenarios over in his head; carry out both sides of conversations that probably would never happen, but that he wanted to take place. He thought about Jack everyday of his absence, and after three months of giving it a lot of thought and planning - no that was a lie the first month of Jack's absence Ianto had just skated by, day by day, hoping that none of the others would notice how totally and completely lost he was without Jack. - Ianto had formulated a plan, a plan that worked around any variable Jack might throw into the mix upon his return.
The one variable Ianto hadn't factored in however, was how seeing Jack again would affect him. Sure he'd thought about what his reaction would be, he'd worked out at least fifty variations of how their first meeting would go. But he hadn't countered on the palpitations, the longing and the need.
All it took was hearing his voice and seeing that damned smile, and Ianto's plan was thrown off course. Damn Harkness.
He'd promised himself that he wouldn't show his feelings, wouldn't let Jack see how much he'd missed him or how glad he was that he was back. But he had to ruin it the first time he opened his mouth are you going back to him? he hadn't wanted to ask the question, hadn't wanted to know, but by asking the question he showed Jack everything he didn't want to show him, and he could kick himself for it. So much for being aloof. At least he'd managed to restrain himself by not letting Jack see how happy his answer had made him. Because Ianto had to admit despite himself, that, that answer, and Jack's bare openness in giving it, had given him the smallest glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe Jack didn't regard him and what they had together the way he'd thought he had. And in Ianto's grand scheme of things, that was no good at all.
Jealousy; that was the next mistake Ianto had made. He hadn't meant for his question towards John Hart to come across like that, but dammit he was jealous, and he had let Jack and John know he was. Things really weren't going to plan.
At least John being there had its benefits; it gave them all a distraction. An annoying, potentially dangerous distraction, but a distraction none the less. Just as long as he and Jack didn't have to be alone together any time soon.
That's it, Gwen was going to get the instant coffee treatment.
He knew why she'd done it, and her heart was in the right place, but he'd much rather have been teamed up with Tosh, or even Owen, hell he'd rather of been teamed up with John Hart than Jack. So much for keeping a respectable distance.
The car journey to the offices was, uncomfortable to say the least. Jack had tried to make small talk, flirted a little, and just generally babbled the entire journey. Ianto had spent the journey gripping the wheel tight, his focus dead ahead, and his mind on anything and everything. It worked reasonably well in keeping his mind off the man set next to him, and also reminded him that he'd used the last of the milk this morning, he'd have to pick some up before he went home.
Was now a good time to have the conversation he'd been planning for months? Look Jack I know we're currently on a mission, searching for dangerous canisters for your potentially psychopathic ex. But what exactly is going on between us?, So do you walk out on all your partners without an explanation?, Am I just a fuck toy to you?, Would you just fuck me already?
Ianto had to take a deep breath. Now really wasn't the time, and his brain really wasn't functioning well enough. Jack was so close to him though, the car was filled with his wonderful scent, 51st century pheromones indeed. And he hadn't had any intimate human contact for so long. Flexing his fingers on the steering wheel Ianto cast a furtive glance at Jack, he was still talking away, the words all jumbled noise in Ianto's head, and he was smiling, though Ianto knew that the smile was just a front.
Jack wasn't as good at hiding his emotions as he liked to believe. It was his eyes that gave him away every time, he could plaster on the biggest smile in the world, laugh and joke with the rest of them, but Ianto could always tell if Jack wasn't really in the moment. The others often missed it, But Ianto never did.
Well Ianto liked to tell himself that he never did. Truth was, when it mattered, when it really mattered. It was as though he couldn't read Jack at all. And that always happened when it was to do with him, with them.
It was frustrating. Ianto prided himself on his ability to read people, to read Jack. But when it came to them, he really didn't know what was going on.
Ianto longed for the day when Jack really was an open book to him.
Ianto's frustrating mix of thoughts came to an abrupt halt as they reached their destination. The tall office building loomed up into the darkness in front of them, and Ianto silently thanked Tosh for the scanner he had in his pocket. Without it they'd have to search every single floor. With it their search field would be dramatically reduced. Well that was the hope anyway.
The car ride had been awkward, but that was nothing compared to the ride up to the top floor in the lift. Ianto kept his focus on the scanner, and kept to the other side of the lift to Jack.
Jack had a thing about lifts, they were a confined space, they generally had mirrors, and there was only a short amount of time to get up to any mischief. Jack often liked to see what they could get up to before the lift doors opened. Which had led to numerous embarrassing situations, and had them kicked out of two hotels in Cardiff.
Thankfully, Jack seemed to have gotten the hint, he stayed to his side of the lift, his conversation was professional, though a little strange, and the ride went without incident.
Ianto exited the lift with his work head firmly screwed on; they were here to find a canister. Everything else could wait until John Hart was out of their lives.
The mood seemed to change considerably once they stepped foot into the offices, Jack was nervous, he was hiding it under a flirtatious bravado, but he was definitely nervous about something. Ianto pondered whether Jack had been nervous the entire trip here; it would have been easy to miss, owing to the fact that he was so distracted with his own confusing thoughts.
Jack made a crack about photocopiers, but Ianto ignored it, they were here to find a canister, and find a canister they were going to do. That and he wasn't quite ready to play along with Jack just yet. He couldn't even bring himself to look at Jack properly, lest he ruin his whole plan.
His manner seemed to subdue Jack, and the joking nervousness, ebbed away to be replaced by soft concern.
”How are you Ianto?” It was such a simple question, asked with concern, and Ianto had so many replies. Months of built up anger, resentment, longing and need could come spilling out with any reply that he might give. Now would be the perfect time to let Jack know exactly how he felt. Tell him all the things that he'd been preparing to say, to settle things between them, or at least get some idea of what was going on. Yet Ianto couldn't bring himself to start it.
His reply was a lie, having Jack back hadn't made things better, they'd made things ten times worse. He tried to distract himself, a half hearted attempt at looking around the room. Anything to keep away from the conversation he wasn't prepared to have yet.
If only he could find the canister then they could be out of... his mind must have been playing tricks on him, Jack surely didn't just ask him out on a date did he? Oh fuck he did. Now that really was unexpected.
Jack had just got the upper hand in the game they were playing. The game that only Ianto knew they were playing. That wasn't fair at all.
Shit!
Ianto had been caught off guard; maybe he did mean more to Jack than he'd thought. What if that nervously asked question, was the answer that he had been longing to hear?
Too stunned and taken aback, Ianto just about managed to make a crack about the date not being in an office. Which, in his shocked and confused mind was probably his way of saying yes; he hoped Jack had caught that, before he'd moved the conversation topic back on to the job at hand. Sending Jack up to the rooftop so that he could have some space to breathe and re-master his plan of action.
Before he could do that though, he let his insecurities show again by bringing John Hart back into the conversation. Jack obviously wasn't that thrilled about him being there. But Ianto needed to know, why they were helping him. Needed to know if Jack wanted this man around, needed to know if he was in anyway a threat, and not just to their lives.
Jack wanted John Hart out of their lives. That was a good thing. Jack really had asked him out on a date, and he'd really said yes. He wasn't sure if that was a good or a bad thing just yet.
He didn't really have that much time to dwell on it though, because shortly after Jack had left to make his way up to the roof, John Hart arrived, and things went to hell.
John Hart was a devious bastard; he was a stupid one, but a devious bastard none the less, and because of John Hart and his stupid actions, the four of them now had to spend a night avoiding themselves.
It gave Ianto a headache just thinking about two Owen's and two Jack's running around, and he couldn't quite decide which one was worse, at least he wasn't going to great lengths to avoid the correct Owen. Although how he'd ended up with a beer in hand, sat on Owen's couch he really couldn't comprehend, except to say that it was the safe option, he really couldn't trust himself around Jack just yet, and he and Owen had become slightly friendlier towards each other since Jack's departure.
Besides, spending time with Gwen was out, as she was making use of a 'night off' by spending it with Rhys. Tosh was busy stealthily watching their counterparts running around Cardiff for scientific purposes, and he really didn't want to spend the time by himself.
“You surprise me.”
Ianto took a sidelong glance at Owen, “Pray tell, in what way do I surprise you?”
Owen took a swig of his beer, “Well, given that we've all got the night off for once, and Jack's back, I thought you'd be off shagging each other senseless. You two not made up yet?”
“Can we not talk about this, please?” Ianto looked at Owen with a look that said, 'if you mention this again I'm going to shoot you' or he would've had he not been so tired.
Owen just shrugged it off, “He wasn't exactly forthcoming about the details of where he's been all this time was he? He must have said something to you though.”
He's back and that's all that matters. Ianto didn't vocalise his thoughts, lest he get any wisecracking comment directed back at him, and he really was too tired to deal with any snarky comments about him and Jack. After all he and Owen had put all that behind them two months into Jack's absence, when Ianto had pulled a gun on him a second time, this time aiming for just above his head instead of his shoulder.
Deciding it was better just to ignore the question, Ianto made his way over to Owen's fridge getting out a couple more beers before flopping back onto the sofa. Owen took the hint and fired up his x-box, nothing like killing a load of computer generated aliens to pass the night away, and avoid any meaningful conversations.
-/-/-/-
Jack's return hadn't heralded much change, things pretty much got back to normal, as if he were never away. A couple of times they'd caught themselves falling into their 'absent Jack' ways though, Gwen leading the way and the rest getting on with it, without Jack's input. Which Ianto could see both annoyed Jack and saddened him. Ianto caught himself feeling happy that their ability to function without him, got to Jack. If he was going to up and leave them without warning or explanation, then he deserved to be left out in the cold now and then, on the other hand though, it served as a reminder that Jack had indeed left them, and it reminded Ianto how much he'd missed him, and all the confused feelings that came with having him gone, and now having him back.
They hadn't gone on their date yet, and Ianto still wasn't allowing himself to get too close to Jack, the others often served as unwitting distractions in this game. It wasn't that Ianto didn't want to get close to Jack, he just didn't want to ruin his rather jumbled plan of action, until he'd got it un-jumbled that is, and figured out exactly what the hell he was going to do, and how he was going to play it out.
Jack's first night back had proved that Ianto wasn't in any way prepared, and he really didn't want to let things fall back into the same routine that they'd had before Jack's departure.
Not that Ianto was completely aloof and cold from Jack's advances. Far from it. They danced around each other, Ianto would throw Jack a bone now and then, and claim it back before Jack could get to it. He wanted to see how far he could push Jack, wanted to see how much power he had over him, over them. They'd flirt, they'd joke. Ianto would build Jack up just enough, and then walk away. Letting Jack know that he wasn't just going to fall back into his arms.
Ianto had a plan after all, and it may not have been going exactly as he wanted it to, but he wasn't going to let it crash off the rails completely.
The case with Tommy however derailed the train completely.
Tosh had been harbouring a soft spot for Tommy since she started working for Torchwood. He'd seen it first hand shortly after he'd joined, and Jack had told him about the previous defrostings during Tosh's time at Torchwood. It was sweet; doomed, but sweet. And it made Tosh so very happy, that she didn't want to see that this wasn't exactly the healthiest of relationships.
Tommy would never age, but Tosh would. They had no way of knowing exactly when Tommy would be needed, and when they'd lose this once a year friend forever. Tosh could be long dead before that ever happened. And Tommy was very much a man out of his own time.
The similarities between Tosh's relationship with Tommy, and his with Jack were scary, and made watching Tosh and Tommy together even more bittersweet.
Jack couldn't die, he didn't age, well not at a regular rate anyway, and Jack didn't belong in this time, not truly. Sure he looked comfortable, looked happy. But this wasn't his time. Ianto wasn't even sure if Jack had a 'time' any more. Why be stuck in the 21st century, or the 51st, when you've travelled with the Doctor? And The Doctor was who Jack had left them for after all.
When the box opened and Tommy's fate was sealed that's when it all came crashing down. Tosh left to spend one last night with Tommy, and Ianto decided he really needed to talk things over with Jack. He really didn't want to lose him again, not without knowing.
'Would you miss me?' Ask a stupid question, get an honest answer.
Of course he'd miss him, he did miss him, and he needed Jack to know that. His answer was simply stated, and to the point. No point in pussy footing around it. He was direct and honest. He hadn't been prepared for Jack to be so honest though, and so open.
Jack had shared with Ianto in the past, whether it be work related stuff that none of the others knew about like Flat Holm, or more personal stuff, like where he actually came from. Although those pieces of information had tended to come after Ianto had already pieced most of it together.
He'd seen the unguarded side of Jack before, he supposed it helped that they were in a physical relationship together, but it generally took some gentle prodding before Jack opened up. The fact that Jack did so, so easily in this instance gave Ianto a flutter of hope.
And the flutter of hope pushed Ianto into taking the plunge. Before his brain even registered what he was doing, Ianto's lips were on Jack's, and it felt so good. In that instance Ianto thanked the Doctor for taking Jack away, for the mere fact that it meant that Jack could return to them, and a moment like this could happen.
The kiss spoke volumes. They both needed it, they both wanted it, and somehow it was more than they'd had before. This kiss was different. It was new. Perhaps it heralded a new beginning for them.
-/-/-/-
The bullet ripped through the air with aggression, piercing the centre of the target with a practised ease. Ianto hated himself for the fact that he had fallen back into Jack's bed so easily, a moment of insecurity and he'd offered himself up to Jack, just like old times.
At least he'd initiated it. He'd been the one to initiate the kiss, and he'd been the one leading Jack down to his bunk. It was a small victory at least. They still hadn't talked though. Ianto still had no clear idea of where he stood, and what this thing between them really was. Sure there was the promise of a date, but what exactly did that mean? And that's all it was, just a promise, no follow through. Not that he'd been making it all that easy for Jack to pin him down and set an actual date.
As Ianto steadied his gun, preparing for another shot, the hairs on the back of his neck prickled, and in one swift motion Ianto turned round and fired.
Jack flinched as a bullet embedded itself into the wall precisely two inches away from his head. Ianto's aim had improved, at least Jack hoped it had, and that Ianto hadn't actually been aiming for his head.
“You knew I was here.”
Ianto looked steadily at Jack, and slowly lowered his gun, “I always know.”
Jack let Ianto's statement hang in the air, before pushing himself away from the wall, “I thought I told you to go home.”
“I did.” Ianto motioned towards his attire, the jeans and long sleeve top definitely not what he was wearing earlier, “but home was cold and empty, and I needed some target practice.”
Jack took a step forward, barely letting Ianto finish what he was saying before he spoke. “You've changed.”
“We've all changed Jack, we had to.”
“I'm sorry I left.”
Ianto placed the gun down on the table next to him with a heavy clunk of metal on metal, “no you're not. If you had the choice over you'd do it exactly the same. You'd leave us all without a seconds thought. It almost broke us Jack.” It almost broke me
“It didn't though,” Jack smiled, though the smile was full of sadness, “you're a brilliant team, and you worked so much better together now.”
Ianto grimaced, “now yes. But at the beginning we were a mess, Owen and I almost killed each other, things almost fell apart between Gwen and Rhys, and poor Tosh was stuck in the middle of it all. We found ourselves suddenly leaderless, we blamed ourselves, we blamed each other, and we almost let it destroy us.”
Jack closed the gap between him and Ianto, pulling him towards him, “but you didn't, and you're all stronger for it.” Jack paused and let his hands drop from Ianto's sides, “what's this really all about?”
Ianto closed his eyes and took a deep breath, it was now or never.
“I know you don't love me, and I doubt you ever will.” Ianto pressed a light kiss on Jack's lips to stop him from interrupting, “and that's fine. But what are we doing here, Jack?”
Jack looked Ianto straight in the eyes, and placed a lazy hand on the Welshman's hip. “Honestly?”
“Honestly.”
“The honest answer is I don't know. You've gotten under my skin Ianto Jones. When you first joined I thought it would be interesting to see what could happen. You pushed so hard to become a member of my Torchwood, and then you acted so unattainable once you were in, and it drove me crazy.” Jack's thumb was drawing lazy circles on Ianto's hip, but his eye contact never wavered.
“Then you let things happen, and I was having fun, I thought we were both having fun, and then…”
Ianto broke eye contact “and then my half converted cyber-girlfriend almost killed everyone.”
“Which made me realise,” Jack touched Ianto's chin gently, drawing the younger man's head upwards, so that he'd look at him, “that I cared more for you than I thought I did, and I'd been ignoring it so much, that I didn't see that you were distancing yourself so much from the team, from me.”
“And now?” Ianto asked with a shaky breath.
“I spent a lot of time thinking about you whilst I was away. I care about you a lot Ianto, maybe it's the kind of love you don't think I'm capable of, and maybe it isn't. But I've taken you for granted and I want to change that. I want to go on dates with you, I want to stay over at your place, and I want you to know that you're more than just an easy fuck.”
Ianto let slip a smile despite himself, “I doubt you could say I was always easy, Jack.”
And there it was, that smile that lit up the room, that smile that actually reached Jack's eyes, “I don't suppose I...”
Jack's sentence came to an abrupt halt, as his lips were silenced by Ianto's.
A guttural moan muffled against Ianto's mouth as Jack kissed back, pulling Ianto flush against him. The moan was quickly replaced by a growl though, as Ianto pulled away from Jack severing contact.
“You know that's not exactly fair play.”
Ianto ran his hand down Jack's chest, his fingers lingering on each of the buttons of Jack's shirt, “I want to be with you, Jack, but I want it to be on an equal footing.”
Jack opened his mouth to speak, but thought better of it, instead he licked his lips in anticipation of what Ianto would do or say next.
Ianto's heart was racing, they were here in the moment. Weeks and weeks of planning, and now it was finally here. No turning back now.
Fuck it.
Ianto pushed Jack against the wall, locking lips with him in a furious kiss, tearing at his shirt, and pressing up against him, his own erection rubbing up against Jack's through far too many layers of clothing.
Was this really the way he had wanted things to go though? Sure they had talked a little bit. Jack had opened up a little, and they'd sort of come to an understanding about what exactly their relationship was all about. But Ianto couldn't help thinking that the groping and the fumbling about with belt buckles, and Jack's uncanny ability to have lube at hand at all times seemed to have interrupted the conversation, and sex this soon really hadn't been part of Ianto's plan. He'd had this idea that he'd tease Jack, flirt with him, kiss him, engage in a little groping and foreplay, maybe get a blowjob or two, and then finally when he knew Jack was near breaking point, fuck him senseless.
Well the rest of his plan hadn't exactly gone smoothly. What was wrong with one more little slip up? It wasn't as if he had much use for the plan any more anyway, and he was horny as hell.
It was cold in the firing range, underground tunnels not exactly being known for their central heating, but the cold had no effect on Ianto, as he prepared to enter Jack. One hand was intertwined with Jack's braced up against the wall, while the other was wrapped around his own slick cock, pumping it gently before nudging it up against Jack's prepared entrance. With a gruff moan escaping his own lips, and what he assumed must've been an alien swearword escaping from Jack's, Ianto entered Jack roughly. Hands gripping together tightly and knuckles scraping the bare brickwork.
Ianto quickly found a rhythm, one hand gripping tightly onto Jack's hip whilst the other, now no longer entwined with Jack's hand pumped Jack's cock in time.
Their moans echoed off the cavernous walls, giving their lovemaking a surround sound soundtrack, which spurred them on even more. Ianto made a mental note make more use of the firing range in the future.
Jack came first, spilling come, over the wall and Ianto's hand, a couple of quick thrusts later and Ianto spilled his seed inside of Jack. Sweaty and sated the two of them stayed where they were, Jack's head resting against the cool, hard brickwork, Ianto still deep inside him, his head resting against Jack's back.
They stayed like that for a couple of minutes, both trying to get their breath back, and unwilling to break the moment.
With a lot of effort Ianto untangled himself from Jack, doing his best to ignore the mess of clothes scattered about their feet, and the CCTV footage he'd have to deal with later. His hand lingered on Jack's hip, staying there even as Jack turned to face him, a devilish look on his face.
“If that's the kind of welcome back sex I get after coming back from the Doctor, I may have to go on more trips with him.”
“I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that.”
Jack pulled Ianto into a tight hug, “as long as my team need me, I won't abandon them again. I won't abandon you again.”
“Promise?”
Pulling away slightly Jack looked Ianto straight in the eyes, and kissed him softly, “I promise.”