Livejournal policies
uses of my journal
This is no longer my main journal; my main journal is over on dreamwidth. This is a mirror of that journal, for people who do not have dreamwidth accounts, and as of April 2009, it's completely friends-locked. I still read my friends list over here, but I post first over there, and the old posts I link back to when I'm trying to give context are the dreamwidth versions, not the LJ versions. I have a strong preference that people who have dreamwidth accounts follow me over there, because I import all of my LJ-based comments over there, so that is where the entire discussion ends up living. (If you would like a dreamwidth account, let me know and I can hook you up with one.)
I use this journal for several purposes simultaneously. I don't make public entries anymore, but some are still left up from when I did, and these tend to be pretty impersonal (or, if personal, quite general). Friends-only entries are reserved for talking about my day-to-day life or other things I don't want to discuss with strangers. Highly personal things are usually filtered (visible to a subgroup of people on my friends list whom I know well) or private (visible only to me).
terminology
Some people who dislike livejournal's "friends list" terminology have started referring to it as a "reading list," and while I like that idea, I'm not going to do it myself. For one thing, I think it's probably fighting a losing battle to get livejournal to change the name, but mainly it's because I don't really treat my friends list as purely a reading list, and don't feel I really can until The Powers That Be divorce the two pieces of functionality of the friends list into "those whose journals you want to read" and "those people who you want to give access to your protected entries" (the fact that dreamwidth has already done this is the main reason why I prefer dreamwidth over livejournal). I am, however, going to start trying to pick up the habit of referring to "friending" and "unfriending" journals rather than people, simply because I think it's more accurate.
linking
Because it's part of how I view the web in general, I don't ask before linking to other people's livejournal entries. Conversely, people who want to link to an entry of mine should feel free to go ahead and do so without asking first.
when my journal is "friended" and when I "friend" other people's journals
I used to say that people who want to add me to their friends lists should feel free to go ahead and do so without asking first, and that in the absence of any other indications, I would assume that they were doing so because they wanted to make it easier for themselves to read my public entries. I also used to say that I didn't automatically reciprocate when people would add me to their friends lists, because 1) I'm happier when I have a fairly short friends list of people whose journals I want to read every day, 2) I'm happier when I know that the people I'm letting read my friends-only entries actually want to read them, 3) I'm happier when the people who are allowed to read those entries are people I've interacted with in person, or extensively online.
But now that any new entries in this journal are automatically friends-only, this policy doesn't make much sense anymore. So how about this: if you'd be interested in "friending" each other's journals, drop me a line as a private message here on livejournal (or as an email to therealjae@livejournal.com). It's true that I am a private sort of person, but if we do know each other a little already, and you're interested in getting to know each other even better by reading and commenting on on each other's journals, I might be interested too.
If you'd simply like to read the kinds of posts that used to be public, though, without the baggage around "friending" my journal, that's just fine. You're going to have to do that reading on dreamwidth, where I still do make public posts, but it's definitely possible. You can do that either by getting a dreamwidth account yourself and following me as a part of your reading list, or by adding my dreamwidth journal to your rss reader and following it as if it were a more conventional blog.
when my journal is "unfriended"
I don't monitor adds and deletions as closely as a lot of people do, but I do look sometimes. If I notice that someone has deleted my journal from their list, then (to paraphrase this entry by stakebait) I might get somewhat paranoid about why, especially if we've actually interacted, but I will also get over it. If someone unfriends my journal, and I'm enjoying reading theirs, I will leave that journal on my own list unless the fact that they unfriended my journal has left me without access to the posts of theirs I was enjoying reading. (Have I mentioned yet that I detest the fact that these two pieces of functionality are intertwined here on livejournal? I do, I really do.)
languages
Warning: this livejournal is trilingual.
Achtung: dieses Livejournal ist dreisprachig.
Let op: dit livejournal is drietalig.
This means that although most of my posts are in English (the ones that aren't are on special filters for people who speak those languages), the comments sections will often include discussion in English, German, and/or Dutch. Please feel free to respond in any or all of those languages; I really want this journal to be a space where people with those three languages can mix and match them as they feel like it! You can even feel free to respond in other languages if you want, but you'll probably just get an amused look (although I do read French and Spanish).
when I "unfriend" other people's journals
When I take people's journals off my friends list, I do so for one of several reasons, including the following: 1) I'm unhappy with the length of my list and am trying to make it shorter, so I remove the journals I often skip things in, or 2) I've gotten the impression that those people would rather not interact with me in my journal anyway (see "comments" below), or 3) I've realized that the ways I use livejournal aren't compatible with that person's ways of using his or her journal (see "comments" below). It doesn't imply anything about what I think of them personally, or whether I consider them friends. In any case, it's very, very rare for me to unsubscribe from a journal just because a person has irritated or offended me, so it's probably not that. I swear!
comments
I try to comment on everything I think to comment on, but sometimes I get busy and either don't comment or don't comment at length. I do respond to comments, but if a response doesn't seem necessary, I won't write one. Similarly, I don't expect a response to my comments in other people's journals unless those comments imply one.
That said, for me, livejournal's main strength is the way it (in contrast to other kinds of blogging software) facilitates interactivity. I tend to comment a lot, and I tend to be happiest when most of the journals I have on my friends list are kept by people who approach livejournal in a similarly interactive way rather than simply by reading passively. I don't take it personally when people read but don't comment often, but if it's consistent over a long period of time, I am likely to take it as an indication that they would rather not be a part of my day-to-day life, and unfriend accordingly. The whole point of being here for me is to interact with other people, so if you stop having conversations with me in my journal, I will probably stop having conversations with you in yours, too. There's absolutely no offense intended by this; I just prefer a chatty friends list.
This is no longer my main journal; my main journal is over on dreamwidth. This is a mirror of that journal, for people who do not have dreamwidth accounts, and as of April 2009, it's completely friends-locked. I still read my friends list over here, but I post first over there, and the old posts I link back to when I'm trying to give context are the dreamwidth versions, not the LJ versions. I have a strong preference that people who have dreamwidth accounts follow me over there, because I import all of my LJ-based comments over there, so that is where the entire discussion ends up living. (If you would like a dreamwidth account, let me know and I can hook you up with one.)
I use this journal for several purposes simultaneously. I don't make public entries anymore, but some are still left up from when I did, and these tend to be pretty impersonal (or, if personal, quite general). Friends-only entries are reserved for talking about my day-to-day life or other things I don't want to discuss with strangers. Highly personal things are usually filtered (visible to a subgroup of people on my friends list whom I know well) or private (visible only to me).
terminology
Some people who dislike livejournal's "friends list" terminology have started referring to it as a "reading list," and while I like that idea, I'm not going to do it myself. For one thing, I think it's probably fighting a losing battle to get livejournal to change the name, but mainly it's because I don't really treat my friends list as purely a reading list, and don't feel I really can until The Powers That Be divorce the two pieces of functionality of the friends list into "those whose journals you want to read" and "those people who you want to give access to your protected entries" (the fact that dreamwidth has already done this is the main reason why I prefer dreamwidth over livejournal). I am, however, going to start trying to pick up the habit of referring to "friending" and "unfriending" journals rather than people, simply because I think it's more accurate.
linking
Because it's part of how I view the web in general, I don't ask before linking to other people's livejournal entries. Conversely, people who want to link to an entry of mine should feel free to go ahead and do so without asking first.
when my journal is "friended" and when I "friend" other people's journals
I used to say that people who want to add me to their friends lists should feel free to go ahead and do so without asking first, and that in the absence of any other indications, I would assume that they were doing so because they wanted to make it easier for themselves to read my public entries. I also used to say that I didn't automatically reciprocate when people would add me to their friends lists, because 1) I'm happier when I have a fairly short friends list of people whose journals I want to read every day, 2) I'm happier when I know that the people I'm letting read my friends-only entries actually want to read them, 3) I'm happier when the people who are allowed to read those entries are people I've interacted with in person, or extensively online.
But now that any new entries in this journal are automatically friends-only, this policy doesn't make much sense anymore. So how about this: if you'd be interested in "friending" each other's journals, drop me a line as a private message here on livejournal (or as an email to therealjae@livejournal.com). It's true that I am a private sort of person, but if we do know each other a little already, and you're interested in getting to know each other even better by reading and commenting on on each other's journals, I might be interested too.
If you'd simply like to read the kinds of posts that used to be public, though, without the baggage around "friending" my journal, that's just fine. You're going to have to do that reading on dreamwidth, where I still do make public posts, but it's definitely possible. You can do that either by getting a dreamwidth account yourself and following me as a part of your reading list, or by adding my dreamwidth journal to your rss reader and following it as if it were a more conventional blog.
when my journal is "unfriended"
I don't monitor adds and deletions as closely as a lot of people do, but I do look sometimes. If I notice that someone has deleted my journal from their list, then (to paraphrase this entry by stakebait) I might get somewhat paranoid about why, especially if we've actually interacted, but I will also get over it. If someone unfriends my journal, and I'm enjoying reading theirs, I will leave that journal on my own list unless the fact that they unfriended my journal has left me without access to the posts of theirs I was enjoying reading. (Have I mentioned yet that I detest the fact that these two pieces of functionality are intertwined here on livejournal? I do, I really do.)
languages
Warning: this livejournal is trilingual.
Achtung: dieses Livejournal ist dreisprachig.
Let op: dit livejournal is drietalig.
This means that although most of my posts are in English (the ones that aren't are on special filters for people who speak those languages), the comments sections will often include discussion in English, German, and/or Dutch. Please feel free to respond in any or all of those languages; I really want this journal to be a space where people with those three languages can mix and match them as they feel like it! You can even feel free to respond in other languages if you want, but you'll probably just get an amused look (although I do read French and Spanish).
when I "unfriend" other people's journals
When I take people's journals off my friends list, I do so for one of several reasons, including the following: 1) I'm unhappy with the length of my list and am trying to make it shorter, so I remove the journals I often skip things in, or 2) I've gotten the impression that those people would rather not interact with me in my journal anyway (see "comments" below), or 3) I've realized that the ways I use livejournal aren't compatible with that person's ways of using his or her journal (see "comments" below). It doesn't imply anything about what I think of them personally, or whether I consider them friends. In any case, it's very, very rare for me to unsubscribe from a journal just because a person has irritated or offended me, so it's probably not that. I swear!
comments
I try to comment on everything I think to comment on, but sometimes I get busy and either don't comment or don't comment at length. I do respond to comments, but if a response doesn't seem necessary, I won't write one. Similarly, I don't expect a response to my comments in other people's journals unless those comments imply one.
That said, for me, livejournal's main strength is the way it (in contrast to other kinds of blogging software) facilitates interactivity. I tend to comment a lot, and I tend to be happiest when most of the journals I have on my friends list are kept by people who approach livejournal in a similarly interactive way rather than simply by reading passively. I don't take it personally when people read but don't comment often, but if it's consistent over a long period of time, I am likely to take it as an indication that they would rather not be a part of my day-to-day life, and unfriend accordingly. The whole point of being here for me is to interact with other people, so if you stop having conversations with me in my journal, I will probably stop having conversations with you in yours, too. There's absolutely no offense intended by this; I just prefer a chatty friends list.