Your voices were spot on. There were lots of things I really liked about this, but for some reason that I can't begin to explain, I think my favorite momemnt was this:
The sun is too bright, and falls diagonally across her desk at the same angle Jack leans against doorways when he's trying to be nonchalant.
She knows this because he is leaning against her doorway.
It felt very Sorkin, even though there was no reason it should.
(I don't know if authors are supposed to have favourite lines - it seems like having a favourite kid, or something - but if we are, then that's one of mine.)
Comments 4
Your voices were spot on. There were lots of things I really liked about this, but for some reason that I can't begin to explain, I think my favorite momemnt was this:
The sun is too bright, and falls diagonally across her desk at the same angle Jack leans against doorways when he's trying to be nonchalant.
She knows this because he is leaning against her doorway.
It felt very Sorkin, even though there was no reason it should.
Great job, thanks for sharing!
I love the ending.
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(I don't know if authors are supposed to have favourite lines - it seems like having a favourite kid, or something - but if we are, then that's one of mine.)
(If we're not, it's probably one of mine anyway.)
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And you need to write more.
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I knoooooow. I just find it really difficult to find time.
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