Comments | theboysofsummer: Strangers in the night (Part 3 of 3)

savvyfan in theboysofsummer

Strangers in the night (Part 3 of 3)

Jun 08, 2009 10:48

Title: Strangers in the night (Part 3, final chapter)
Characters: Clay Buchholz, Dusty Brown, various members of the Red Sox
Rating: R
Time: May 2009
Summary: On a bus ride from Columbus to Pawtucket, Buchholz dreams of Fenway
Disclaimer: A fictional story, written only for entertainment purposes

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team: boston red sox, rating: r, char.: clay buchholz, char.: dusty brown, author: savvyfan, team: minor leagues

Comments 14

offthepost June 8 2009, 20:39:52 UTC

:-O i don't know what to say! Wow, I loved this.

Behind him, Dusty paused for a moment and watched, then licked his lips, and smiled.

:-O :-O :D :D (that's all my brain is able to think right now....:D)

savvyfan June 8 2009, 21:01:46 UTC

Haha, thanks so much! :-) It was great fun to write.

99everafter June 8 2009, 23:31:14 UTC

awesome writing! I always love the way you tell a story and this is one of best. <3

I love how Clay watched his teammates play, how he realized it's just a dream and was okay with it, and then how he was surprised he could actually felt Dusty and decided to indulge himself with the new adventures. I love the sadness, loneliness, hotness, confusedness, mysteriousness, and yearning-ness Clay showed in the dream. I just want to hold him and tell him don't let go keep fighting you will be okay everything will be okay. oh. Clay...

my favorite lines:
"Buchholz liked invisibility dreams. He had them often, and he was sure a shrink would diagnose him with some kind of disorder because of it, but he didn't care. They were fun. Soothing."
"... he wanted to bottle this dream and hold on to it for the rest of his life. "

ps: the last line is so creepy. XDDD

savvyfan June 9 2009, 05:18:09 UTC

Thanks so much, that was quite lovely. :-)

But I just wonder... why is the last line creepy? I wasn't going for that, at all.

99everafter June 9 2009, 14:15:13 UTC

I meant it's creepy in a good way. it's like when Clay dreamed about Dusty I suspected it might be because Dusty was indeed doing something to him at that time. But it turned out that they were on the team bus so I assumed the dream was all in Clay's mind and all because of a weird kiss long long time ago. However, Dusty's smile behind Clay's back made me react like 'wait a min. maybe it had something to do with Dusty, maybe there will be a sequel, maybe they two will...'

it's as mysterious and intriguing as the end of the Godzilla movie that Godzilla was killed but an egg was intact and a little creature got out. .... Or maybe it's just me. ;-)

savvyfan June 9 2009, 14:25:54 UTC

LOL, yeah, that's pretty much it. You just expressed it a bit differently, I guess.

Dusty's an enigma, that's for sure. ;-)

Thread 6

wrennette June 9 2009, 03:03:05 UTC

love the juxtaposition of dream and reality here, and i did a little *gigglesnort* at the end, because of creepy dusty being creepy, and pervy.

savvyfan June 9 2009, 05:21:33 UTC

thank you, so much, but... Dusty? Creepy? Pervy? Really? Now I'm sad - I don't think Dusty is like that at all. I think he's quite mysterious and sneaky, and he obviously loves playing with his teammates' pysches, but creepy? Oh noes! :-(

wrennette June 9 2009, 20:36:57 UTC

it's not necessarily a bad thing, but the combination of clay's very lucid dream and dusty's smile at the end makes my brain go "wait, what?" and then go "oh, clay just got sexually assaulted by his teammate. dusty, you perv!" and then comes the *gigglesnort* because i evidently find that amusing. my brain, it does not necessarily make logical steps. but yeah, i think that's a bit creepy. hot, but creepy.

savvyfan June 10 2009, 05:59:29 UTC

OK, I see where you're coming from.

The question remains, of course, did he or didn't he? ;-)

jennyagain June 9 2009, 19:26:40 UTC

yay yay yay for the rich layering of details in your storytelling. you really work the dream-angle to great effect here, walking us through what's magical about it, what's real-life-like, what's WACKY but great. love dusty and the edge of mischief that comes with him, love that clay seems surprised that dusty is the one attending to him here - love that he notes whose hair it is NOT before figuring out whose it is. ;D the details of clay getting blown in the dugout - SO HOT.

i miss that kid. tell me he's coming home soon ... ?

great work, as always. you spoil me. ;D

savvyfan June 9 2009, 19:38:53 UTC

Haha, thanks so much. Dusty just always looks like he's up to no good... I still for the life of me can't figure him out. ;-)

Clay, we left a light on for you at Fenway!