Poetry lost is poetry found

[the_visigoth]

All ice
No water
Girl cries
I thought her
Stronger
More lies
She told me
Surprise
Won't hold me
No longer

© Sean Ramsden 21/02/2006

Comments

[nimnod]

Really like it except for the "No longer" bit - sounds a bit ebonics-y for the rest which is really eloquent, but can't see another word you could use to fit your syllable scheme so see why you chose it ;)

Anyway, it's cool. You should post it to echoes@mombe.org.