It wasn't as easy for Hisoka to pull away from it all. Though he was awake enough to see fuzzy little shapes and colors, he was still far too close to dead to start fathoming the concept of "hotel" for all it really meant.
He offered a small, weak smile, and reached out a hand for him to chew upon while the rest of his body recovered.
That finally managed to get through to him. Mello dragged himself to his knees slowly, crawling to the doorway and kneeling there without quite being able to look at Hisoka.
"I didn't want you to say that," he countered softly, too neutrally. "But I'll help."
At least his ribs weren't showing anymore. Mello swallowed thickly, scooting closer to help prop him up, slowly and carefully. He continued to avoid eye-contact, focusing only on his own breathing to keep from dissolving into another panic attack.
Mello's eyes widened and he flinched-- but he reminded himself not to move away. Though he felt rather ill again. Being near Hisoka just brought back images and tastes, and he'd never been so disgusted in his life. Mello clenched his jaw against the taste of bile rising in the back of his throat once ore.
His breath caught sharply and Mello stiffened, lifting a hand to push him off and then dropping it away because he knew he didn't have the right.
"St--" No. He didn't have the right to ask him to stop either. His jaw clenched again as he tried once more to shake off the nausea, still unable to summon the will to close his eyes and so staring in horror at Hisoka.
"I know you don't really want me," he continued, pausing for a moment to kiss him again. "But I just.. I want to hear you sing to me. I want to feed you. I'm sorry -- I shouldn't want it anymore.."
"Please--" he choked out, barely a whisper, and finally seemed to remember how to move. He didn't have the right, true, but Mello tried to shove Hisoka off of himself anyway, hyperventilating.
He offered a small, weak smile, and reached out a hand for him to chew upon while the rest of his body recovered.
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"I need your goddamned help, all right?! Is that what you wanted me to say?"
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"I didn't want you to say that," he countered softly, too neutrally. "But I'll help."
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"Just.. I can't get myself sitting up. It's humiliating."
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More licking now. His mouth traveled along the length of Mello's arm, kissing a needy path.
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"St--" No. He didn't have the right to ask him to stop either. His jaw clenched again as he tried once more to shake off the nausea, still unable to summon the will to close his eyes and so staring in horror at Hisoka.
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"It hurts when you don't sing..."
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