You call that a kangaroo? I call THIS a - fuck.

[kirk_lazarus]

Kirk could sleep through all kinds'a weather. Rain, hail, snow, thunder, lightnin', you name it - he probably been unconscious in it. Came wit' the territory o' bein' an army vet, you either learned to sleep over the sound o' gunfire an' explosions or you went crazy and ran out into it

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[of_the_oath]

"Kirk, are you alright?"

She stood in the rec room doorway with a curious frown, a thin smear of clay on her cheekbone and a bowl of glaze she'd been mixing in her hands.

"What is that? Is that a kangaroo?"

[kirk_lazarus]

"No, I'm not a'ight, and yes this is a bl- this is a motherfuckin' kangaroo! Only a few months old, if I be any judge an' I ain't, and I found the god damn thing on my god damn doorstep! What am I s'posed to do?" Kirk said, all at once, a thin note of panic to his usually gravelly, self-assured Osiris-voice.

"If it starts makin' them Skippy sounds I'ma kill it," he added. The kangaroo just looked at him.

[of_the_oath]

"You will not," she said sternly, stepping further into the room, her glaze set aside, forgotten. "It's helpless. It needs someone to look after it."

[kirk_lazarus]

"Here!" Kirk said, thrustin' out his arms, complete wit' roo-bundle. "Take it, then! I don't want no kangaroo! I only know how to shoot 'em, not how to keep the motherfuckers alive!"

Far as he knew they jus' hopped 'round fields an' shit and annoyed farmers 'til they hired a guy like him to shoot 'em.

[wigsbylionel]

The last thing, perhaps, that Lionel expected to take with his morning tea that day was the sight of his self-proclaimed negro doppelganger darting about, wild-eyed, with an infant-sized bundle cradled in his arms.

Not that he was one to treat a thing like that out of the ordinary.

"You look a bit lost," he observed quietly, from the doorway leading back to the kitchen.

[kirk_lazarus]

"Lost? What the fuck you mean, lost?! I ain't lost! I know where I am!" Kirk near-hollered at the weird-ass dude with the mask on. He sounded familiar, which was even more fuckin' disturbin', considerin' the circumstances.

He glared fo' a while. "...You know anythin' about kangaroos?" he axed, 'ventually.

[wigsbylionel]

It certainly was a shame that Lionel hadn't recalled the man's volume control deficiency before it was too late. If he had, he most likely would have reconsidered calling extra attention to himself.

However, some clear identification of the thing in his arms entrapped Lionel's interest, and he took a step forward to observe the animal, his head cocked thoughtfully to one side. "I raised a nutria when I was young, care of a Giant Rat exhibit. But I'm afraid I can't tell you...much about marsupials. Have you fed it?"

[kirk_lazarus]

"No," said Kirk, decidin' to ignore the parts o' what he said that din't interest him, which was most of it. "I don't know what to feed it." He was pretty sure kangaroos ate grass an' farmer's crops, which was why he'd been hired to catch 'em an' shoot 'em back in Coober-Pedy, but his up-close-and-personal experiences with roos ended there.

Until now.

"I need a book or some shit," he grumbled.

[dr_robchase]

Chase had Nate curled protectively in his arms when he was going out and nearly ran right into Kirk with his own seeming bundle. Unless Chase was severely underestimating what some people would do, though, that definitely wasn't any baby a normal person could have.

"Wh-" he managed, utterly unhelpful. "Where'd that come from?"

[kirk_lazarus]

Ah. Aussie Chase dude. Jus' what the doctor ordered, so to speak.

"I found it," he said. "Where'd you get yours? Oh," he said when he realized. "That ain't a kangaroo."

[dr_robchase]

Chase had the feeling that, in his mind, he would constantly be thinking of Nate as the little 'roo now, without even meaning to. "No, mine's definitely a baby," he said with a bemused little grin on his lips, shifting Nate up to see. "Where'd you find a kangaroo in this weather? And a joey, at that."

[kirk_lazarus]

"It's warmin' up," said Kirk. "Maybe he migrated."

The kangaroo's tail hung limply over Kirk's arm and he frowned at it some. "What the fuck am I supposed to do wit' it?"

[jill_langston]

Having been up in the lab for most of the morning already, Jill had stopped by the kitchen for a cup of coffee and was now headed to the rec room for a bit of a break. Coming up behind Kirk and what looked to be a baby kangaroo wasn't exactly expected, but at the same time she could hardly be surprised for some reason.

"Where did you get a kangaroo?" she asked curiously, watching it lie in Kirk's arms.

[kirk_lazarus]

Kirk whirled and glared at her.

"The kangaroo store, where the fuck do you think I got a fuckin' kangaroo?" he said. "Fuck if I know, man! Jus' showed up on my goddamn doorstep like the stork brought it or some shit, hell, what the fuck am I supposed to do with a kangaroo on a god damn island?!"

Yeah, 'fice to say he was more than a li'l upset 'bout the whole thang. Otherwise he woulda been nicer to hot bitches like Jill. But he was too flustered fo that.

[jill_langston]

"I think," Jill said, trying not to laugh, "you're supposed to take care of it."

It seemed an awful lot like Lucifer's present the year before, the little kitten that really wasn't so little anymore and she had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from smiling too widely. "This happens every year," she explained, her voice a little strained from keeping her laughter in check. "People get things. Presents... kangaroos."

[kirk_lazarus]

"The fuck you say!" Kirk yelped, his eyes all wide 'n shit. "I can't take care of no kangaroo!"

The thing made an adorably cute squeaky sound in his arms, an' he almost dropped it.