Meta-What? My Problem With Varian Wrynn

[the__ivorytower]

I needed to get this out, it's been stewing, and unlike my Thrall post, I have more than enough energy to hate at Varian Wrynn.

Comments

[mel_redcap]

*waves flag for your headcanons* XD

Yeah, Varian's a dick. :P I didn't actually know about all this evidence of dickishness that you have collected here (awesome, ty, I like reading your rants!) but I knew enough; plus, there's a couple more bits that annoy me.

First of all, Varian blames Thrall for the Apothecaries' revolt, because he was in charge (of the whole Horde) and therefore is responsible for whatever his subjects do. (Paraphrased 'cause it's been a while since I did Wrathgate.) In which case, turning the logic around, Varian is technically responsible for the Defias riots and his own wife's death, because hey, he was in charge... :P (And really, he IS responsible, because of the whole not-paying thing, but does he admit that? Noooo.)

Second, although Cata-era Stormwind is still half in ruins and there are countless starving refugees in Westfall that it's apparently too hard/expensive to help, Varian has had the time and money to have a giant statue of himself built in front of the keep. PRIORITIES, DUDE!

[the__ivorytower]

I did actually miss a few things

[mel_redcap]

I waver between refusing to believe that the comics exist let alone believing they're canon, and thinking that okay, maybe the comics are canon-ish but there's no way Thrall allows slavery, it's all underground. Bleh.

...Maybe the statue was a gift the way rebuilding Stormwind was "free". :P :3

[yukie1013]

Oh god lol that statue. WTF man. When I saw that thing I started giggling forever.

it would have been kinda cool if that was of like - King Llane, or King Adamant (I...think he was the house's big famous founder dude? BLAH LORE), or Anduin Lothar. Hell, maybe even BOLVAR - he and Varian were BFFsies and if they wanted to play up Varian's NEVAR FORG3T side in a positive way, they could've put a monument to Bolvar there.

With the statue as it is he looks like a narcissistic doofus.

[blazecheetah]

I'm waiting on him to insult Elune in front of a group of night elves and get mobbed/mauled by druids in cat form.

Please just give me this, anyone.

[the__ivorytower]

He's Malfurion's bff and got invited to his wedding and all. Also, shows up to his dinner parties, insults all the guests and leaves. But he respects them too much to sleep in his ship instead of the building that makes him uncomfortable.

Fuck you, Varian. Forever. Also, Knaak.

[blazecheetah]

I swear I think all that sleeping gave Malfurion brain damage.

[dragonhawker]

I still can't get over that they invited Varian to the wedding AND NOT JAINA.

[shahrizai]

I'm still trying to figure out what the fuck happened at Blizzard between Warcraft III and WoW. I think all the WIII writers jumped ship to start plotting Starcraft II or Diablo III as soon as they were done. And then they probably moved on to Titan, because there sure as hell isn't any story in the WoW era that compares to the earlier canon.

[the__ivorytower]

No, unfortunately, the core writer (Chris Metzen) has been there from WCI to WoW: MoP. Truthfully, there's some level of continuity in each stage, and some level of 'wtf are you on?' (see Uther), but the later WoW expansions and their heavier reliance on their tie in writers is really killing their characters' personalities.

[shahrizai]

I know metzen has the keys to the castle, but I feel like the supporting writers have changed so much. There's just so many inconsistencies and retcons.

[dragonhawker]

Basically everyone I discuss Varian with re: the stonemasons pull out the line that Varian wanted to pay the stonemasons, but the Council of Nobles blocked him. I dunno. I don't buy it. I don't know what the political setup of checks and balances is like in Stormwind, but if Varian was able to get a big-ass statue of himself erected in the courtyard outside the palace, he obviously had some form of funds available. Did he even try?

[edit] Eh, well, I suppose one statue doesn't count for much in the long run; I'm not too good at keeping track of when various things where supposed to happen. Who built the harbor? Was that supposed to have 'always been there' or did it appear only after the Defias shenanigans? Because I really wonder why in hell ANY guild in the city of Stormwind would be willing to deal with Varian after what happened to the Stonemasons. At best, you run the risk of bankruptcy because your client can't be assed to (or just can't) pay you; at worst you'll get banished from the city and adventurers come after your head.

[the__ivorytower]

I can only assume the harbour was supposed to be there from the beginning, even though Stormwind was originally designed as landlocked. The reason I assume this is because VanCleef's plan to bombard it from the Defiant simply would not have worked if there was a whole huge range of mountains in the way.

The strong implication is that the nobles in Stormwind are all thoroughly corrupt, greedy, selfish bastards, and that we're supposed to feel bad for Varian because he can't keep them in check. Or something.

[dragonhawker]

Not gonna lie -- I was thrilled when I heard we get to off Garrosh in the next expansion, but... not pleased that there was no equivalent chance to unseat Varian on the Alliance side. Plus even if we get to take down Garrosh, there's still Sylvanas... some people have even suggested having Sylvanas take over as Warchief after Garrosh, which I -- what?

I like both Alliance and Horde and usually pay no mind to people complaining about Blizzard favoring one over the other (plus your earlier comment about how lore should rely on story coherency and not on "balance" is still relevant) But this... this is pretty unbalanced. It's sort of like my reaction to the Alliance/Horde text in the Panda faction choice screen. It really makes you wonder why any pandaren in their right mind would ever choose Horde based on the text offered.