The One True Free Life (26 + epilogue /26)
Title: The One True Free Life (26 + epilogue / 26)
Characters: Alt!Ten/Rose, and everyone else I can cram in to the Alt!Verse, plus several OCs
Rating: Teen
Spoilers: Everything
Summary: When Rose and Alt!Ten return to Pete's World, after a much longer absence than planned, they find that things have begun to go a bit pear-shaped there. Can Our Heroes save the British Republic while at the same time working out their own Byzantinely complicated personal issues?
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 17 | Chapter 18 | Chapter 19 | Chapter 20 | Chapter 21 | Chapter 22 | Chapter 23 | Chapter 24 | Chapter 25 | Chapter 26/ Epilogue | Whole story on Teaspoon
After he told her, she didn't speak to him for the rest of the day and went off to visit Donna in hospital alone, despite his preamble about please not blaming him.
Mucking about in the garden after she'd left, he fervently wished that their first row had been about leaving the toilet seat up or being late to supper and not the effect of a Time Lord metacrisis on a human body. He had insisted that he could have chosen to just not tell her the truth--she'd be none the wiser--and the fact that he had broken his promise to himself proved his dedication to their relationship and his respect for her.
She hadn't fully understood, and he remained unsure as to whether he'd ever be able to adequately convey the importance of his decision to, as she said,unpromise himself and reveal the tragic fate of Donna Noble.
"How could he?" Rose had asked, making it clear that by "he" she meant "you."
"I already told you, she would have died. There was no other way," he'd insisted.
"But to not even give her the choice.... God, that is so him."
The Doctor felt very much wounded by all of these third-person pronouns. "He does the best that he can," he said, trying to remain calm and not escalate the situation. "I do the best that I can. I always have done."
She'd turned her back to him to ask her final question. "Would you have done the same to me? Erase my memory, drop me back off with mum, like it never happened?"
"I couldn't let you just die. Never."
"But I'm going to," she said, still not meeting his eye. "Die, I mean. Some day I'm going to die, and you as well. Get used to the idea now, because you do not get to make that decision."
She hadn't been wrong of course, and it was this talk of life and death that had brought him to the garden after, to watch the whole process unfold before his eyes. The flip side of spending a life together is the ending of it.
"He didn't want me to tell you because he wanted you to be happy, here, with me. But neither he nor I get to make that call for you, and so I am telling you the truth. Hate me or love me. And him as well. Be angry or accept that he is the way that he is. He's not really free to be otherwise. But I am. I'm trying to learn."
She hadn't answered, but left the room and not long after left the house entirely and gone on the errand to visit Donna that they had originally planned together. Alone in her bedroom, the Doctor sat on the edge of her bed, to think, to second-guess his words and his choices, and then to third and fourth and fifth guess them in addition. He could see the whole of time and space, his mind now unfettered, but in these day-to-day relations he had to admit that none of this knowledge was an advantage. If anything, it was a massive liability.
He caught the glint of something shiny and familiar on her bedside table and moved to look closer. The TARDIS key, threaded on its plain metal chain, placed in a dish with other frequently-worn items of jewellery. He'd not noticed that she still wore it, and he felt that she must be making at least some effort to hide the fact from him. He hadn't quite known what to make of it. Was it simply a talisman or good luck charm, or did she truly hope that one day a blue police box would reappear in this world and take her away again?
She herself had perhaps not made that choice yet.
The Doctor was still in the garden when Rose returned, and he waited to see if she'd come and find him on her own, or if it would be back to the garishly floral guest room for him.
"How is she?" he asked when Rose approached him across the lawn.
She looked as if she was attempting to appear stern but failing, her cheeks constrained in a suppressed smile. "I think she's rather enjoying the morphine."
"So she'll be okay, then?" he asked hopefully, plucking a little yellow flower from a nearby shrub.
"Full recovery. She'll need some time in physical therapy to get that arm back up to snuff, but otherwise she's very lucky. Bullet went right through, didn't hit any major arteries. She'll be fine."
"And how about us?" He plucked a leaf from the bottom of the stem he was holding.
"What about us?"
"Are we okay?" He plucked another leaf and let it flutter to the ground, resisting the temptation to distract himself from Rose's answer by completely perceiving its progress through time and space.
"I think we'll live," she said quietly. "It wasn't your fault anyway, I was just shooting the messenger."
"I would have done the same. At least, I think I probably would have done. Things are looking a bit different to me these days."
She crossed her arms and gave a thin-lipped smile. "But you will be so bloody honest, for god's sake. Don't tell me that, all right? Sometimes, I just don't need to know every single thing that goes on in your head."
He didn't really pretend to understand that sentiment, but apologised anyway.
"So, does that mean he's alone now?" Rose looked up to where the first evening stars were beginning to poke through the early evening cloud cover and he followed her gaze.
"Well, you know him. He'll find someone else fun and clever and...." He looked down at her and noted she was pouting again. "Your choice, Rose. This is the way things are."
She stepped in to his space and he folded his arms around her by reflex, placing the flower behind her ear in the process. "I'll take this as an indication of your feelings on the matter," he said, his chin resting on the top of her head. "Though words are good too, I would just like to go on record as noting."
She pulled away and looked up at him seriously, nodding. "I'll put my semaphore flags away then, shall I?"
"You opted for the version who talks about his feelings. You may come to regret that yet."
"Who's to say I don't already?" she teased.
"Oi, the cheek!" He reached out to tickle a spot under her ribs that made her squeak which he'd discovered the night they'd been released from gaol, but she jumped back and took off at a run back towards the house.
The flower fell out from where he'd tucked it and landed in the middle of the lawn, reflecting the warm light of the setting sun as the grass around it turned a dark verdigris. Night flying insects began their evening cycle of life and death, aided by bats and martins and the nectar of the climbing moonflower . There was no need to rush back in to the artificial light of the house. Rose would be waiting whether he was quick or slow, but this moment would never happen again. She'd chosen to speed through it, and he stooped and picked up the flower she had dropped. Whether life is a happy accident or ticks with the precision of a watch, it doesn't really matter in the living of it. You make your choices and you take your chances, and release each moment after it happens to fly away and provide a bat with a calorie, or live on and drink the dew off a flower.
Rose was waiting at the french doors, her hand shading the window glare from her eyes in order to to see him in the gathering dark. He dropped the flower again to the ground and turned his back to it before it landed. Nothing ever really lands though, he thought. We're all falling through space together, some just more happily than others.
Epilogue
While watching the news report of some rather strange goings on in Nottingham, the Doctor began to make a series of odd faces. Rose suspected he may have been overdoing it just slightly, for Tony's benefit.
"No, that's not right," the Doctor said after a final round of what had looked like sniffing the air. "Not right at all." He looked over at Rose and raised an eyebrow.
She didn't even wait for the inevitable question. "No," she said flatly. "No, not tonight, I'm sorry. I've been minding Tony all day and I am absolutely knackered. I'm going to have to take a pass on this one."
The Doctor frowned. "But that's what you said last time."
"And it was true last time as well. Poor timing these aliens and other assorted baddies have, always popping up after Deepa's had a day off. Don't let me stand in your way, though." Rose basked in the bright glare of the smile that now began to take over the Doctor's face. "Well, go on then," she said, and he reached in to a pocket and pulled out his mobile.
Only hearing half of a phone conversation between the Doctor and Donna was always good for a laugh in and of itself and Rose sat back on the sofa, shushing Tony as he pestered her to hand him one of his toys.
"Were you watching the news just now?" the Doctor began, launching right in to it. "Oh yes! I mean, no, not right at all, of course. Quite definitely wrong. Fancy a trip? Of course in the Minor. I fixed the suspension! No, I did it myself, it's as good as new. Better than new! Rides like a dream. No, I promise, three stars and up on accommodations. You will continue to bring that one time up, won't you? A bloke's allowed to make a mistake every once in a while. You will? Oh, brilliant, just brilliant! Fantastic! Pick you up in an hour. Pack light!"
He rung off and jumped up from the sofa as if he was spring loaded. "Some people aren't too tired to go and save the world," he flung over his shoulder as he left the room.
"You just make sure you save a bit of that dashing hero energy for me, yeah? For when you get home?" She stood in the doorway to the family room and he turned from where he was about to go up the stairs and walked back over to her, looking quite smug indeed.
"You needn't worry on that score," he purred before placing a teasing little kiss on her lips. From behind them, they could hear Tony making fake-sick noises, and the newsreader announcing that several witnesses had reported seeing a man sprout a third eye, spontaneously and right in front of them, in the check-out line at Asda.
"Now that I have got to see!" the Doctor beamed as he took the stairs two at a time to go fetch his keys and coat.
Characters: Alt!Ten/Rose, and everyone else I can cram in to the Alt!Verse, plus several OCs
Rating: Teen
Spoilers: Everything
Summary: When Rose and Alt!Ten return to Pete's World, after a much longer absence than planned, they find that things have begun to go a bit pear-shaped there. Can Our Heroes save the British Republic while at the same time working out their own Byzantinely complicated personal issues?
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 17 | Chapter 18 | Chapter 19 | Chapter 20 | Chapter 21 | Chapter 22 | Chapter 23 | Chapter 24 | Chapter 25 | Chapter 26/ Epilogue | Whole story on Teaspoon
After he told her, she didn't speak to him for the rest of the day and went off to visit Donna in hospital alone, despite his preamble about please not blaming him.
Mucking about in the garden after she'd left, he fervently wished that their first row had been about leaving the toilet seat up or being late to supper and not the effect of a Time Lord metacrisis on a human body. He had insisted that he could have chosen to just not tell her the truth--she'd be none the wiser--and the fact that he had broken his promise to himself proved his dedication to their relationship and his respect for her.
She hadn't fully understood, and he remained unsure as to whether he'd ever be able to adequately convey the importance of his decision to, as she said,unpromise himself and reveal the tragic fate of Donna Noble.
"How could he?" Rose had asked, making it clear that by "he" she meant "you."
"I already told you, she would have died. There was no other way," he'd insisted.
"But to not even give her the choice.... God, that is so him."
The Doctor felt very much wounded by all of these third-person pronouns. "He does the best that he can," he said, trying to remain calm and not escalate the situation. "I do the best that I can. I always have done."
She'd turned her back to him to ask her final question. "Would you have done the same to me? Erase my memory, drop me back off with mum, like it never happened?"
"I couldn't let you just die. Never."
"But I'm going to," she said, still not meeting his eye. "Die, I mean. Some day I'm going to die, and you as well. Get used to the idea now, because you do not get to make that decision."
She hadn't been wrong of course, and it was this talk of life and death that had brought him to the garden after, to watch the whole process unfold before his eyes. The flip side of spending a life together is the ending of it.
"He didn't want me to tell you because he wanted you to be happy, here, with me. But neither he nor I get to make that call for you, and so I am telling you the truth. Hate me or love me. And him as well. Be angry or accept that he is the way that he is. He's not really free to be otherwise. But I am. I'm trying to learn."
She hadn't answered, but left the room and not long after left the house entirely and gone on the errand to visit Donna that they had originally planned together. Alone in her bedroom, the Doctor sat on the edge of her bed, to think, to second-guess his words and his choices, and then to third and fourth and fifth guess them in addition. He could see the whole of time and space, his mind now unfettered, but in these day-to-day relations he had to admit that none of this knowledge was an advantage. If anything, it was a massive liability.
He caught the glint of something shiny and familiar on her bedside table and moved to look closer. The TARDIS key, threaded on its plain metal chain, placed in a dish with other frequently-worn items of jewellery. He'd not noticed that she still wore it, and he felt that she must be making at least some effort to hide the fact from him. He hadn't quite known what to make of it. Was it simply a talisman or good luck charm, or did she truly hope that one day a blue police box would reappear in this world and take her away again?
She herself had perhaps not made that choice yet.
The Doctor was still in the garden when Rose returned, and he waited to see if she'd come and find him on her own, or if it would be back to the garishly floral guest room for him.
"How is she?" he asked when Rose approached him across the lawn.
She looked as if she was attempting to appear stern but failing, her cheeks constrained in a suppressed smile. "I think she's rather enjoying the morphine."
"So she'll be okay, then?" he asked hopefully, plucking a little yellow flower from a nearby shrub.
"Full recovery. She'll need some time in physical therapy to get that arm back up to snuff, but otherwise she's very lucky. Bullet went right through, didn't hit any major arteries. She'll be fine."
"And how about us?" He plucked a leaf from the bottom of the stem he was holding.
"What about us?"
"Are we okay?" He plucked another leaf and let it flutter to the ground, resisting the temptation to distract himself from Rose's answer by completely perceiving its progress through time and space.
"I think we'll live," she said quietly. "It wasn't your fault anyway, I was just shooting the messenger."
"I would have done the same. At least, I think I probably would have done. Things are looking a bit different to me these days."
She crossed her arms and gave a thin-lipped smile. "But you will be so bloody honest, for god's sake. Don't tell me that, all right? Sometimes, I just don't need to know every single thing that goes on in your head."
He didn't really pretend to understand that sentiment, but apologised anyway.
"So, does that mean he's alone now?" Rose looked up to where the first evening stars were beginning to poke through the early evening cloud cover and he followed her gaze.
"Well, you know him. He'll find someone else fun and clever and...." He looked down at her and noted she was pouting again. "Your choice, Rose. This is the way things are."
She stepped in to his space and he folded his arms around her by reflex, placing the flower behind her ear in the process. "I'll take this as an indication of your feelings on the matter," he said, his chin resting on the top of her head. "Though words are good too, I would just like to go on record as noting."
She pulled away and looked up at him seriously, nodding. "I'll put my semaphore flags away then, shall I?"
"You opted for the version who talks about his feelings. You may come to regret that yet."
"Who's to say I don't already?" she teased.
"Oi, the cheek!" He reached out to tickle a spot under her ribs that made her squeak which he'd discovered the night they'd been released from gaol, but she jumped back and took off at a run back towards the house.
The flower fell out from where he'd tucked it and landed in the middle of the lawn, reflecting the warm light of the setting sun as the grass around it turned a dark verdigris. Night flying insects began their evening cycle of life and death, aided by bats and martins and the nectar of the climbing moonflower . There was no need to rush back in to the artificial light of the house. Rose would be waiting whether he was quick or slow, but this moment would never happen again. She'd chosen to speed through it, and he stooped and picked up the flower she had dropped. Whether life is a happy accident or ticks with the precision of a watch, it doesn't really matter in the living of it. You make your choices and you take your chances, and release each moment after it happens to fly away and provide a bat with a calorie, or live on and drink the dew off a flower.
Rose was waiting at the french doors, her hand shading the window glare from her eyes in order to to see him in the gathering dark. He dropped the flower again to the ground and turned his back to it before it landed. Nothing ever really lands though, he thought. We're all falling through space together, some just more happily than others.
Epilogue
While watching the news report of some rather strange goings on in Nottingham, the Doctor began to make a series of odd faces. Rose suspected he may have been overdoing it just slightly, for Tony's benefit.
"No, that's not right," the Doctor said after a final round of what had looked like sniffing the air. "Not right at all." He looked over at Rose and raised an eyebrow.
She didn't even wait for the inevitable question. "No," she said flatly. "No, not tonight, I'm sorry. I've been minding Tony all day and I am absolutely knackered. I'm going to have to take a pass on this one."
The Doctor frowned. "But that's what you said last time."
"And it was true last time as well. Poor timing these aliens and other assorted baddies have, always popping up after Deepa's had a day off. Don't let me stand in your way, though." Rose basked in the bright glare of the smile that now began to take over the Doctor's face. "Well, go on then," she said, and he reached in to a pocket and pulled out his mobile.
Only hearing half of a phone conversation between the Doctor and Donna was always good for a laugh in and of itself and Rose sat back on the sofa, shushing Tony as he pestered her to hand him one of his toys.
"Were you watching the news just now?" the Doctor began, launching right in to it. "Oh yes! I mean, no, not right at all, of course. Quite definitely wrong. Fancy a trip? Of course in the Minor. I fixed the suspension! No, I did it myself, it's as good as new. Better than new! Rides like a dream. No, I promise, three stars and up on accommodations. You will continue to bring that one time up, won't you? A bloke's allowed to make a mistake every once in a while. You will? Oh, brilliant, just brilliant! Fantastic! Pick you up in an hour. Pack light!"
He rung off and jumped up from the sofa as if he was spring loaded. "Some people aren't too tired to go and save the world," he flung over his shoulder as he left the room.
"You just make sure you save a bit of that dashing hero energy for me, yeah? For when you get home?" She stood in the doorway to the family room and he turned from where he was about to go up the stairs and walked back over to her, looking quite smug indeed.
"You needn't worry on that score," he purred before placing a teasing little kiss on her lips. From behind them, they could hear Tony making fake-sick noises, and the newsreader announcing that several witnesses had reported seeing a man sprout a third eye, spontaneously and right in front of them, in the check-out line at Asda.
"Now that I have got to see!" the Doctor beamed as he took the stairs two at a time to go fetch his keys and coat.