Fic resurrection: Black Sheep II, (PG)
Title: Black Sheep Interlude II: Ratchet
Rating: PG
Summary: Loyal servant, sadistic monster... The enigmatic creature known only as Blackout. And no one knows him better than his own creator... Introspective POV piece.
Companion to A Day in the Life of a Decepticon Psychopath and Interlude I: Megatron
A/N- So originally, A Day in the Life of a Decepticon Psychopath was supposed to be a loose series, with the Black Sheep snippets as interludes. The problem is that the rest of the 'series' sucked, which is why Black Sheep and A Day in the Life are posted separately. So now, months later, I'm typing up the introspective interludes and posting them anyway, despite the loss of the series. This one and the other I've got written and am editing are both in first person rather than third like Megatron's part, though. Why I did it that way, I'm not entirely sure, but Megatron's part does seem better in third, and this one is definitely better in first. :P
x-x-x
He wasn't supposed to be this way. I made him to help people, not hurt them...
And yet, there he is, the very worst of the worst, a sadistic monster. What did I do wrong?
I tried to give him everything he needed to be a good person, an aid to those in need... Strength to carry the largest of the wounded to safety, speed to get there in time, confidence to stay calm in the midst of terror and pain... and compassion, to drive him on.
But he uses his strength to intimidate and destroy, his speed to run down the very people he was to protect, and his compassion-
It's the most horrific part about him, his ability to show compassion and empathy even as he tortures. The few who survive his attention with some semblance of sanity tell me of the gentle voice that crooned to them even as it hurt them. A voice that haunts their dreams and leaves that dead look in their eyes.
And I'm responsible for all of it.
He was my creation, after all. He is what I made him to be. I can't even blame Megatron; my sparkling had a cruel streak long before Megatron knew of him. At first I tried to temper it, tried to teach him ethics and morals and love, but he soon proved himself uncontrollable. He did what he wanted, knowing that there was nothing I could do to stop him. Against my wishes, he ignored his training as a field medic in favor of his own pursuits.
To my dismay and dawning horror, he showed more interest in learning how to break a person than how to put them back together.
Then Megatron came, and any hope I still had of rehabilitating my wayward creation as lost. In retrospect, it wasn't a surprise that he choose to side with the Decepticons. They not only allowed him to pursue his 'studies,' they actively encouraged him, channeling his twisted passions into a weapon to be used against the Autobots.
Every time his name came up after a fight, it was like being stabbed in the spark. My creation was not only hurting people, he was hurting my friends. As the war escalated, more and more of my comrades came back, victims of a monster I created.
There are nights I can't look at my own reflection without seeing all the ones I couldn't save.
But no matter how I avoid it, one truth remains -
I killed them.
Rating: PG
Summary: Loyal servant, sadistic monster... The enigmatic creature known only as Blackout. And no one knows him better than his own creator... Introspective POV piece.
Companion to A Day in the Life of a Decepticon Psychopath and Interlude I: Megatron
A/N- So originally, A Day in the Life of a Decepticon Psychopath was supposed to be a loose series, with the Black Sheep snippets as interludes. The problem is that the rest of the 'series' sucked, which is why Black Sheep and A Day in the Life are posted separately. So now, months later, I'm typing up the introspective interludes and posting them anyway, despite the loss of the series. This one and the other I've got written and am editing are both in first person rather than third like Megatron's part, though. Why I did it that way, I'm not entirely sure, but Megatron's part does seem better in third, and this one is definitely better in first. :P
x-x-x
He wasn't supposed to be this way. I made him to help people, not hurt them...
And yet, there he is, the very worst of the worst, a sadistic monster. What did I do wrong?
I tried to give him everything he needed to be a good person, an aid to those in need... Strength to carry the largest of the wounded to safety, speed to get there in time, confidence to stay calm in the midst of terror and pain... and compassion, to drive him on.
But he uses his strength to intimidate and destroy, his speed to run down the very people he was to protect, and his compassion-
It's the most horrific part about him, his ability to show compassion and empathy even as he tortures. The few who survive his attention with some semblance of sanity tell me of the gentle voice that crooned to them even as it hurt them. A voice that haunts their dreams and leaves that dead look in their eyes.
And I'm responsible for all of it.
He was my creation, after all. He is what I made him to be. I can't even blame Megatron; my sparkling had a cruel streak long before Megatron knew of him. At first I tried to temper it, tried to teach him ethics and morals and love, but he soon proved himself uncontrollable. He did what he wanted, knowing that there was nothing I could do to stop him. Against my wishes, he ignored his training as a field medic in favor of his own pursuits.
To my dismay and dawning horror, he showed more interest in learning how to break a person than how to put them back together.
Then Megatron came, and any hope I still had of rehabilitating my wayward creation as lost. In retrospect, it wasn't a surprise that he choose to side with the Decepticons. They not only allowed him to pursue his 'studies,' they actively encouraged him, channeling his twisted passions into a weapon to be used against the Autobots.
Every time his name came up after a fight, it was like being stabbed in the spark. My creation was not only hurting people, he was hurting my friends. As the war escalated, more and more of my comrades came back, victims of a monster I created.
There are nights I can't look at my own reflection without seeing all the ones I couldn't save.
But no matter how I avoid it, one truth remains -
I killed them.