A Phoenix By Any Other Name (2/8)
Title: A Phoenix By Any Other Name
Character/Pairing: Wash/Taylor
Word Count: Total for all chapters ~21000; this chapter ~2100
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Drama, Romance
Rating: PG-13
Warning: Language, Mild Violence
Spoiler Alert: All Season 1 episodes
Summary: Waking up is, in itself, a surprise, but Wash is even more surprised by the help she gets with her efforts to get home.
Author’s Note: Meant to say in the initial author’s note, the Taylor/Wash relationship is the one described in my earlier story, Our Ghosts Stay With Us. It might help to read that one first, but it’s by no means a necessity. Disclaimer wise, I just wrote this because I enjoy writing, no copyright infringement intended, and I certainly do not own Terra Nova.
Part One
Terra Nova
Jim Shannon climbs the stairs to the command center, knowing he needs to talk to Taylor but dreading it at the same time. Talyor’s putting on a good front for the colonists, but Jim knows that he's a wreck. Ever since he and Elisabeth found out about Taylor’s relationship with Wash, Jim has been worried about what the fallout would be if something happened to one of them.
Now it has happened, and it’s even worse than Jim could’ve imagined. Not only did they lose Wash, but they lost her at the hand of Taylor’s own son. Watching Lucas shoot her was one of the hardest things he ever did, and he can’t even begin to imagine what it was like for Taylor. Jim shakes his head. He’s pretty impressed that Taylor can even make himself get out of bed in the morning, much less run the colony.
They’re all still bothered by the fact that, when they’d gotten back after blowing up the portal and Hope Plaza, all that was left of Wash was her things in her quarters and her tags, the tags left rather cruelly in the middle of the desk in Taylor’s office. Her body was nowhere to be found; even Boylan had no idea what the Phoenix Group soldiers had done with her.
Now standing at the partially-open door to Taylor’s office, Jim peers around the edge of it. He sees Taylor at the desk, staring blankly at the plex in his hands. Clearing his throat, Jim steps into the office. Taylor jumps a little, but Jim pretends not to notice. Instead, he just launches into his report on the work details he has running to repair the damage done to the colony, something that stings because it would usually be Wash running the project.
After about ten minutes, Jim finishes, and Taylor says absently, “OK, thanks, Shannon. Just let me know if any issues arise.” He nods to Jim, a clear dismissal.
Jim turns to go, but he pauses at the door. “Taylor?” The commander looks up. “Elisabeth wanted me to invite you for dinner tonight, or any other night this week.”
Taylor tries to smile, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Thanks, Shannon, but I’m good. Tell Elisabeth I appreciate the offer, though.”
Jim nods, not at all surprised by the response. “I’ll do that, but just know that our door is always open.” With that, he slips back out into the sunny afternoon.
Taylor tosses his plex onto the desk. He’s mad at himself for his lack of focus, and he has no idea how to pull himself together. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out her tags, staring at them and running a finger over the two small objects he has attached to them.
Just thinking about her brings memories of the morning of the eleventh pilgrimage to mind, waking up with her tucked into his side, her ebony hair fanned out over his shoulder and onto the pillow. In the years that they’d been together, they’d rarely indulged in staying all night, though the frequency had definitely increased in the last few months. That night, despite her irritation with him over his ordering her to stay in Terra Nova while he went to the portal, she’d asked him to stay.
As always happens now, the image of her sleeping soundly next to him is suddenly replaced by the image of his son shooting her in the head at point blank range. He knows Shannon was right, that going in to try and save her would have been suicide, but he can’t help but hate himself for not doing it, for not trying.
He also wishes that they’d just said to hell with it and been more open about their relationship for these past six years when it had been anything but a platonic friendship. He takes a moment to think about their first time together, not long after her arrival here following his 118 days on his own. After being alone for that long, all it had taken was him seeing her again to know that he missed her a lot more than you miss a friend or colleague. Lucky for him, she had missed him almost as much as he had missed her, and it hadn’t taken all that long for them to act on it.
Over the years, they’d been careful to guard the secret of their relationship, knowing that they could still be reprimanded for it, even millions of years in the past. Something had changed, though, after he’d been infected by the pathogen that had taken his mind back to 2138. In the hours after waking up from the stun blast from Alicia that saved his life, he’d come to realize how much he needed her and how bad he’d felt about being willing to kill himself after being told that Ayani was gone.
That night, he’d gone to see her, and somehow, without any real definitive action, their relationship had evolved into something even deeper and more significant. Things had changed more since then, but he can’t bring himself to think about those changes right now. They just make everything that happened hurt that much more.
He shakes his head and looks at the clock. Seeing that it’s already getting late, he’s surprised by the fact that he’s managed to make it through another day without her, though the days feel like trudging through sand.
He knows one thing for certain. At this point in his life, he can’t ever let anyone in again. Everyone he has ever loved is either dead, as Ayani and Alicia are; or irrevocably lost, as Lucas is. All three were lost by his own faults, at least it’s his belief that they were. What he is left with is the knowledge that he can’t ever lose anyone again, not if he wants to keep going. And he knows he needs to keep going, if only for the good of the colony, because the colony is all he has left.
After taking one last look at her tags, he slips them back into his pocket. Sighing, he gets up, leaves his office and wanders down the steps of the command center. He heads to the market to find something to eat and put on a show for the colonists that everything is fine.
Phoenix Group Convoy
When Alicia wakes up again, she has no idea how long she was out, but the truck is moving again. It’s easier for her to open her eyes this time, and her headache has diminished to a tolerably dull roar. Rolling her shoulders, she realizes that her wrists are no longer bound, just one wrist is secured to a metal slat on the truck instead. A small box with a bottle of water and some sort of fruit in it sits next to her on the floor. She picks up a piece of the fruit and examines it, even taking a whiff of it.
“It’s clean, Wash.” Mira eyes her from the back of the truck. “I’ll take a bite of it if you want.”
Alicia shrugs and takes a bite of the fruit, and it makes her realize how hungry she was. After eating a few more bites, she sets it down. “So, you’re calling me Wash now?”
Imitating Alicia’s shrug from a few moments earlier, Mira replies, “Lieutenant is too much of a mouthful, and I didn’t really think you’d appreciate me calling you Alicia. Wash seemed the safest option.”
“Fair enough.” Alicia takes a drink of the water and goes back to munching on the fruit. After a silent minute or two, Alicia asks sarcastically, “Are we there yet?”
Mira snorts. “We’ll actually be at the planned camp site soon.”
“How long was I out this time?”
“What, are you trying to figure out where we are based on how long we’ve been traveling?” Mira gives her a suspicious look.
Wash rolls her eyes, something she regrets when it makes her head pound. “Mira, I was a damned field medic long before I was second in command of Terra Nova. Considering that you told me I was out for two days, what I’m trying to figure out now is whether I have a catastrophic brain injury or just a really nasty concussion.”
“Ah. Sorry,” Mira responds, not sounding sorry at all, “Only about two hours. I’m guessing you’re likely fine.”
“Thanks, doc.” Wash knows she sounds about as sincere as Mira.
The truck comes to a stop before Mira can retort, and she just jumps out of the back. When she returns a few minutes later, it’s to tell Alicia that they’re getting the camp set up. “I’ll be back for you later. Don’t try anything, Wash. I’m posting one of my people at the back of the truck, and I’ve made it very clear to them that they can shoot you if it becomes necessary. Don’t make it necessary, because if you do, you’ll definitely still be at the top of my ‘people I hate’ list.”
“Frankly, even moving makes my head hurt. I’m not going anywhere,” Alicia pauses, and Mira turns to go, “Yet.”
Mira turns back to her, shooting her a dark look, but Alicia isn’t impressed. “I’m only going to sit tight and be a good girl for so long. You have to know that, Mira. Think about how long you’d be willing to wait, subtract a few days, and you’ll have an idea of how long I’ll last.”
For a moment, Mira looks so angry that Alicia wonders if she’s about to get another blow to the head. Then, her face twists into a wry, almost feral smile. “Understood, Wash. But keep in mind that your value to me will be based on cooperation. And part of what I’ll do to protect that value is keep Lucas away from you. I feel certain that is something of value to you, since he’d gleefully blow your brains out right now, given the opportunity.”
Alicia stares at Mira for a moment before giving her a slight nod. Mira returns the nod, and she jumps out of the back of the truck again, leaving Alicia alone in the low light. She sighs, finding a small amount of relief in the fact that she no longer feels a compelling need to close her eyes and sleep. That at least makes the medic in her happy.
She slumps back against the wall of the truck, wondering what the hell is really going on here. Mira has always disliked her, so she can’t quite figure out what the play is for Mira and the Sixers. Maybe if she can get Mira to tell her why the Phoenix Group left the colony, she’ll understand the big picture better. Suddenly, she sits up straight when it occurs to her that maybe Shannon got her message about Cu Lao Cham to Nathaniel. Maybe they blew the portal.
Her mind races at that thought. She doesn’t know why that would make the Phoenix Group abandon the colony, but if it did, she’s happy to know it. Leaning back against the wall again, she pulls her knees up to her chest, wrapping her free arm around her legs. Her thoughts turn to Nathaniel. It’s killing her to think that he probably doesn’t know she survived, not because she wants them to mount a rescue, but because she knows what kind of pain he must be in between her being gone and Lucas turning on him so spectacularly.
She closes her eyes, trying to push those thoughts away. Instead, she concentrates on the notion that she’s going to get out of this, with or without assistance from Mira and the Sixers. She’ll give them a little time, but then all bets will be off. All she wants right now is to go home, and come hell or high water, she knows she will make it.
Memories of the night before the eleventh pilgrimage flash unbidden to her mind, first of Nathaniel above her as they moved almost desperately against one another, and then later falling asleep in his arms, hoping that it wouldn’t be for the last time. A loud noise from the back of the truck suddenly shatters her reverie. Looking up to see a person standing there in the lengthening shadows, her stomach drops just a little, but her face doesn’t betray her. “Lucas.”
On to Part Three
Character/Pairing: Wash/Taylor
Word Count: Total for all chapters ~21000; this chapter ~2100
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Drama, Romance
Rating: PG-13
Warning: Language, Mild Violence
Spoiler Alert: All Season 1 episodes
Summary: Waking up is, in itself, a surprise, but Wash is even more surprised by the help she gets with her efforts to get home.
Author’s Note: Meant to say in the initial author’s note, the Taylor/Wash relationship is the one described in my earlier story, Our Ghosts Stay With Us. It might help to read that one first, but it’s by no means a necessity. Disclaimer wise, I just wrote this because I enjoy writing, no copyright infringement intended, and I certainly do not own Terra Nova.
Part One
Terra Nova
Jim Shannon climbs the stairs to the command center, knowing he needs to talk to Taylor but dreading it at the same time. Talyor’s putting on a good front for the colonists, but Jim knows that he's a wreck. Ever since he and Elisabeth found out about Taylor’s relationship with Wash, Jim has been worried about what the fallout would be if something happened to one of them.
Now it has happened, and it’s even worse than Jim could’ve imagined. Not only did they lose Wash, but they lost her at the hand of Taylor’s own son. Watching Lucas shoot her was one of the hardest things he ever did, and he can’t even begin to imagine what it was like for Taylor. Jim shakes his head. He’s pretty impressed that Taylor can even make himself get out of bed in the morning, much less run the colony.
They’re all still bothered by the fact that, when they’d gotten back after blowing up the portal and Hope Plaza, all that was left of Wash was her things in her quarters and her tags, the tags left rather cruelly in the middle of the desk in Taylor’s office. Her body was nowhere to be found; even Boylan had no idea what the Phoenix Group soldiers had done with her.
Now standing at the partially-open door to Taylor’s office, Jim peers around the edge of it. He sees Taylor at the desk, staring blankly at the plex in his hands. Clearing his throat, Jim steps into the office. Taylor jumps a little, but Jim pretends not to notice. Instead, he just launches into his report on the work details he has running to repair the damage done to the colony, something that stings because it would usually be Wash running the project.
After about ten minutes, Jim finishes, and Taylor says absently, “OK, thanks, Shannon. Just let me know if any issues arise.” He nods to Jim, a clear dismissal.
Jim turns to go, but he pauses at the door. “Taylor?” The commander looks up. “Elisabeth wanted me to invite you for dinner tonight, or any other night this week.”
Taylor tries to smile, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Thanks, Shannon, but I’m good. Tell Elisabeth I appreciate the offer, though.”
Jim nods, not at all surprised by the response. “I’ll do that, but just know that our door is always open.” With that, he slips back out into the sunny afternoon.
Taylor tosses his plex onto the desk. He’s mad at himself for his lack of focus, and he has no idea how to pull himself together. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out her tags, staring at them and running a finger over the two small objects he has attached to them.
Just thinking about her brings memories of the morning of the eleventh pilgrimage to mind, waking up with her tucked into his side, her ebony hair fanned out over his shoulder and onto the pillow. In the years that they’d been together, they’d rarely indulged in staying all night, though the frequency had definitely increased in the last few months. That night, despite her irritation with him over his ordering her to stay in Terra Nova while he went to the portal, she’d asked him to stay.
As always happens now, the image of her sleeping soundly next to him is suddenly replaced by the image of his son shooting her in the head at point blank range. He knows Shannon was right, that going in to try and save her would have been suicide, but he can’t help but hate himself for not doing it, for not trying.
He also wishes that they’d just said to hell with it and been more open about their relationship for these past six years when it had been anything but a platonic friendship. He takes a moment to think about their first time together, not long after her arrival here following his 118 days on his own. After being alone for that long, all it had taken was him seeing her again to know that he missed her a lot more than you miss a friend or colleague. Lucky for him, she had missed him almost as much as he had missed her, and it hadn’t taken all that long for them to act on it.
Over the years, they’d been careful to guard the secret of their relationship, knowing that they could still be reprimanded for it, even millions of years in the past. Something had changed, though, after he’d been infected by the pathogen that had taken his mind back to 2138. In the hours after waking up from the stun blast from Alicia that saved his life, he’d come to realize how much he needed her and how bad he’d felt about being willing to kill himself after being told that Ayani was gone.
That night, he’d gone to see her, and somehow, without any real definitive action, their relationship had evolved into something even deeper and more significant. Things had changed more since then, but he can’t bring himself to think about those changes right now. They just make everything that happened hurt that much more.
He shakes his head and looks at the clock. Seeing that it’s already getting late, he’s surprised by the fact that he’s managed to make it through another day without her, though the days feel like trudging through sand.
He knows one thing for certain. At this point in his life, he can’t ever let anyone in again. Everyone he has ever loved is either dead, as Ayani and Alicia are; or irrevocably lost, as Lucas is. All three were lost by his own faults, at least it’s his belief that they were. What he is left with is the knowledge that he can’t ever lose anyone again, not if he wants to keep going. And he knows he needs to keep going, if only for the good of the colony, because the colony is all he has left.
After taking one last look at her tags, he slips them back into his pocket. Sighing, he gets up, leaves his office and wanders down the steps of the command center. He heads to the market to find something to eat and put on a show for the colonists that everything is fine.
Phoenix Group Convoy
When Alicia wakes up again, she has no idea how long she was out, but the truck is moving again. It’s easier for her to open her eyes this time, and her headache has diminished to a tolerably dull roar. Rolling her shoulders, she realizes that her wrists are no longer bound, just one wrist is secured to a metal slat on the truck instead. A small box with a bottle of water and some sort of fruit in it sits next to her on the floor. She picks up a piece of the fruit and examines it, even taking a whiff of it.
“It’s clean, Wash.” Mira eyes her from the back of the truck. “I’ll take a bite of it if you want.”
Alicia shrugs and takes a bite of the fruit, and it makes her realize how hungry she was. After eating a few more bites, she sets it down. “So, you’re calling me Wash now?”
Imitating Alicia’s shrug from a few moments earlier, Mira replies, “Lieutenant is too much of a mouthful, and I didn’t really think you’d appreciate me calling you Alicia. Wash seemed the safest option.”
“Fair enough.” Alicia takes a drink of the water and goes back to munching on the fruit. After a silent minute or two, Alicia asks sarcastically, “Are we there yet?”
Mira snorts. “We’ll actually be at the planned camp site soon.”
“How long was I out this time?”
“What, are you trying to figure out where we are based on how long we’ve been traveling?” Mira gives her a suspicious look.
Wash rolls her eyes, something she regrets when it makes her head pound. “Mira, I was a damned field medic long before I was second in command of Terra Nova. Considering that you told me I was out for two days, what I’m trying to figure out now is whether I have a catastrophic brain injury or just a really nasty concussion.”
“Ah. Sorry,” Mira responds, not sounding sorry at all, “Only about two hours. I’m guessing you’re likely fine.”
“Thanks, doc.” Wash knows she sounds about as sincere as Mira.
The truck comes to a stop before Mira can retort, and she just jumps out of the back. When she returns a few minutes later, it’s to tell Alicia that they’re getting the camp set up. “I’ll be back for you later. Don’t try anything, Wash. I’m posting one of my people at the back of the truck, and I’ve made it very clear to them that they can shoot you if it becomes necessary. Don’t make it necessary, because if you do, you’ll definitely still be at the top of my ‘people I hate’ list.”
“Frankly, even moving makes my head hurt. I’m not going anywhere,” Alicia pauses, and Mira turns to go, “Yet.”
Mira turns back to her, shooting her a dark look, but Alicia isn’t impressed. “I’m only going to sit tight and be a good girl for so long. You have to know that, Mira. Think about how long you’d be willing to wait, subtract a few days, and you’ll have an idea of how long I’ll last.”
For a moment, Mira looks so angry that Alicia wonders if she’s about to get another blow to the head. Then, her face twists into a wry, almost feral smile. “Understood, Wash. But keep in mind that your value to me will be based on cooperation. And part of what I’ll do to protect that value is keep Lucas away from you. I feel certain that is something of value to you, since he’d gleefully blow your brains out right now, given the opportunity.”
Alicia stares at Mira for a moment before giving her a slight nod. Mira returns the nod, and she jumps out of the back of the truck again, leaving Alicia alone in the low light. She sighs, finding a small amount of relief in the fact that she no longer feels a compelling need to close her eyes and sleep. That at least makes the medic in her happy.
She slumps back against the wall of the truck, wondering what the hell is really going on here. Mira has always disliked her, so she can’t quite figure out what the play is for Mira and the Sixers. Maybe if she can get Mira to tell her why the Phoenix Group left the colony, she’ll understand the big picture better. Suddenly, she sits up straight when it occurs to her that maybe Shannon got her message about Cu Lao Cham to Nathaniel. Maybe they blew the portal.
Her mind races at that thought. She doesn’t know why that would make the Phoenix Group abandon the colony, but if it did, she’s happy to know it. Leaning back against the wall again, she pulls her knees up to her chest, wrapping her free arm around her legs. Her thoughts turn to Nathaniel. It’s killing her to think that he probably doesn’t know she survived, not because she wants them to mount a rescue, but because she knows what kind of pain he must be in between her being gone and Lucas turning on him so spectacularly.
She closes her eyes, trying to push those thoughts away. Instead, she concentrates on the notion that she’s going to get out of this, with or without assistance from Mira and the Sixers. She’ll give them a little time, but then all bets will be off. All she wants right now is to go home, and come hell or high water, she knows she will make it.
Memories of the night before the eleventh pilgrimage flash unbidden to her mind, first of Nathaniel above her as they moved almost desperately against one another, and then later falling asleep in his arms, hoping that it wouldn’t be for the last time. A loud noise from the back of the truck suddenly shatters her reverie. Looking up to see a person standing there in the lengthening shadows, her stomach drops just a little, but her face doesn’t betray her. “Lucas.”
On to Part Three