Tales, Ch. 8
Jack barely had time to recover when River leapt gracefully out of the basket and pressed her lips to his in a quick but scintillating greeting.
“Ouch,” the Doctor mouthed as he met Jack’s eyes.
Jack winked merrily and rubbed his thumb over River's jaw.
“Alright. I guess I deserved that…” he sighed as he looked into her eyes.
River pouted as she crossed her arms.
“You certainly did! Letting me rot in the Queen’s prison for all this time! Why didn’t you come break me out?” she demanded.
“Goldi, baby,” Jack supplicated, “Having the Queen of Hearts as an enemy wasn’t a risk I could afford to take. I’m sorry, I really am, but sometimes the affairs of the kingdom take precedence. Besides, I knew I'd see you soon, with my help or not.”
He blinked innocently at River until she conceded, almost against her own will.
“Fine. I forgive you," she said unconvincingly. "Let’s get inside so we can talk about it…in private.”
“Oh course,” Jack said as he waggled his eyebrows.
The Doctor coughed as he walked forward with an extended hand.
“Excuse me, Emperor,” he broke in. “I just wanted to say what a pleasure it is to finally meet you.”
“Friend of mine,” River added.
“Hello,” Jack said flirtily as he accepted the proffered hand. “Any friend of Goldi’s… “
He appeared to have an epiphany even as he said the words.
“Speaking of,” he said animatedly as he turned to River, "why don't we celebrate your homecoming?"
The crowd cheered as Jack led the way, followed by River and the Doctor.
It didn’t take long for the party to get into full swing. Wine, food and a retinue of entertainers seemed to appear from nowhere. As a festive dance broke out, the Doctor marveled at the sudden spectacle from his seat at a long banquet table.
“How did you throw all this together, in literally no time?” he prodded his host.
Jack just smiled and shrugged lazily as he cradled River against his shoulder.
“Let’s just say I have my ways,” he hinted.
River rolled her eyes.
“Or a magic lamp that grants your every desire,” she said dully.
The Doctor blinked and set down his drink with sudden interest.
“A magic lamp? Really!” he said excitedly.
“It’s just next to the hoard of golden eggs from his enchanted goose,” River revealed.
“Whoah, Goldi!” Jack said with his hands in the air. “Don’t give away all my secrets!”
“Like your font of eternal youth?” River said angrily. "I swear this man is actually 200 years old, but he still acts like a complete infant sometimes."
She pushed away from the table and stormed off without any further explanation.
“Oh, she is ticked,” Jack said worriedly. “I knew she hadn’t really forgiven me. Passive aggressive.”
“I think she really did want to talk to you in private,” the Doctor offered. “Maybe you should go talk to her.”
Jack sighed and drained the rest of his glass glumly.
“Anything else I can get you, before I walk the plank?” he asked.
The Doctor frowned and traced the outline of the thick wood grain against the table.
“Actually, have you heard anything about a young lady named Rose Red? I need to find her,” he said solemnly.
Jack placed one finger on his chin and looked thoughtful.
“Goldi’s friend? Yeah, I almost remember hearing something, but I’m sure it was just a rumor. There’s a little shepherd boy who lives in the next village who claims to have seen her, but his reputation is dubious, to say the least.”
“What do you mean?” the Doctor asked as Jack stood up, already looking regretfully in the direction River had gone.
Jack started to turn away, but stopped to throw one glance over his shoulder.
“That boy?” Jack grimaced, “He’s always crying wolf.”
The Doctor felt a shudder go down his spine at Jack’s ominous choice of words, but tried to play it off as he gazed back into the mirthful crowd. All around him, people were dancing, laughing and having a great time. Maybe he should try to relax for one evening.
It was then that he noticed a hooded figure at the edge of the room, staring directly at him. The Doctor stood up, and knew it wasn’t a coincidence that the watcher flinched and moved to leave just as quickly. The Doctor navigated deftly through the dancing bodies as he tried to catch up, hoping to find the mysterious person before they could disappear under the cover of night.
The Doctor ran outside, and caught a glimpse of the figure as they made to run away under the moonlight.
“Hey!” he yelled. “Wait just one minute!”
It didn’t take long for him to catch up, and in a diving leap, he grabbed the lower half of their body and sent both of them tumbling to the ground.
“Gotcha!” the Doctor cried excitedly. “And just who are…”
His voice died on his lips as he looked into the terrified eyes of Amy Pond, or Gretel rather.
“Gretel!” the Doctor said in surprise after he had time to recover. “What on earth are you doing here? Why are you running from me?”
Amy scooted away and dropped her hood shamefully as she peered up at the Doctor.
“I live here,” she explained. “And I saw you when you landed in that big balloon. I just knew wherever you were going was someplace wonderful, and I wanted to go with you.”
“Oh, Gretel,” the Doctor said in a gentle voice.
He blinked then and looked around quickly as he stood to his full height.
“But not just you, right? Wherever you go…he goes. Isn’t that right, Rory?”
The Doctor accented his former companion’s name in a condescending voice as Amy giggled, still sitting on the ground.
“Its Hansel!” an exasperated voice answered as Rory appeared from around the corner.
“You know,” the Doctor said with a suspicious scowl. “I don’t think you wanted to go with me at all. Knowing you two trouble makers, I’ve half a mind to guess that you were planning to steal that balloon and take off adventuring on your own.”
Rory’s mouth dropped as the Doctor exposed their ill-advised plan.
“How did you know?” he asked in a flabbergasted voice.
“Hansel!” Amy whined. “Don’t tell him that!”
The Doctor crossed his arms and glowered as he lectured to them.
“Listen. Where I’m going is far too dangerous for the likes of you two. There’s evil witches, demented serial killers and mysterious curses, just to name a few of the perils. It’s not a place for children, especially ones who have a habit of wandering off. So forget it.”
Amy stood up and shook her head sadly as Rory stuck his hands in his pockets.
“So that’s that, right?” the Doctor asked rhetorically.
But suddenly Amy brightened, and she revealed a large bag that had been concealed under her cloak.
“I don’t suppose this would change your mind?” she asked as she allowed him to peek at the contents.
Inside was a beautiful antique golden lamp, a live goose clucking happily to itself, and a stopper filled with clear liquid.
“Please tell me that’s not what I think it is…” the Doctor warned.
The conversation was cut short however, when a dinn broke out overhead from the castle balcony. Seconds later, a number of silk shirts and trousers were sent aloft, and fell slowly to the ground around the Doctor and his friends.
"...could've freed me at any time with that magic lamp or one of your other devices!" River was shouting.
“Oh come on, baby!” Jack’s voice supplicated. “I’m gonna have to go naked again! What are you doing?”
“Insensitive bastard!” River’s voice followed. “Would serve you right!”
They continued to argue as the Doctor turned to Amy and Rory, a knowing look forming on his face.
“Perhaps your company would be preferable,” he admitted.
Amy and Rory looked at him hopefully, glee filling their eyes.
“Well don’t just stand there!” the Doctor cajoled. “We’ve got a kingdom to save! Come along Ponds!”
He turned on his heel as his friends followed, neither of them questioning for one second just who he was referring to.
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