These ceremonies, they're important. Not because you're petty or selfish but because a baby shower marks the community's recognition of impending motherhood. You should totally have a meet the baby party. And think of it this way -- Zara is going to LOVE looking at all those cards someday!!!
One problem with watching a friend go through adoption is the fear that the adoption won't actually happen - that the birth mother will change her mind.
Indeed I have this problem with baby showers anyway - call me superstitious but I'd rather wait until baby is here and OK before celebrating anything. I guess there is a "blessings" ceremony which focuses on the mother prior to her going through the birth process, not the baby - not quite appropriate for your sitution, but could have been adapted as you prepared to embark on motherhood
I think a baby welcoming is much better. Kiss goodbye to the shower, it's just a chance for women to talk about their episiotomies anyway, and have a secular or religious baptism instead. Definitely.
First of all, I don't think that what you are feeling means you are being selfish or ungrateful. On the contrary, I think what you are feeling is normal under the circumstances.
I think a meet the baby party is a great idea. Also, I don't know if you are planning a christening, baby naming, or something along those lines, but that would also be a wonderful opportunity to celebrate Zara's arrival into your lives.
YES. I didn't have a baby shower either, although I had a mamablessing - very ceremonial. I had planned on a "meet the baby" party, after her birth, but when the birth became what it was, I just couldn't stomach it. THere were moments after that I wish I had... but we finally had a big party for her birthday. DON'T WAIT A YEAR! do it do it do it. Creating the time and space to be honored as the mother you are, is so important.
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Indeed I have this problem with baby showers anyway - call me superstitious but I'd rather wait until baby is here and OK before celebrating anything. I guess there is a "blessings" ceremony which focuses on the mother prior to her going through the birth process, not the baby - not quite appropriate for your sitution, but could have been adapted as you prepared to embark on motherhood
I think a baby welcoming is much better. Kiss goodbye to the shower, it's just a chance for women to talk about their episiotomies anyway, and have a secular or religious baptism instead. Definitely.
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I think a meet the baby party is a great idea. Also, I don't know if you are planning a christening, baby naming, or something along those lines, but that would also be a wonderful opportunity to celebrate Zara's arrival into your lives.
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DON'T WAIT A YEAR! do it do it do it. Creating the time and space to be honored as the mother you are, is so important.
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