(no subject)
Original post: here. Silly ficlet inspired by #11 of the April Pic Prompts. Completely ignores canon. Doomsday? What's that?! Once again not Beta'd, cos if I wait I'll lose the nerve to post. *g* Concrit welcomed. :)
Title: Bump
Author: christn7
Rating: G
Characters: Ten/Rose
Summary: She waddles over, best she can, and swats him on the arm. “Your bloody fault, you know.”
Bump
--
“Did you get my ice cream?” Rose asks, eyeing the Doctor and his suspiciously empty hands. She waits, ever so patiently, for him to answer but he just stands in her mother’s doorway, staring at her with wide eyes.
His mouth moves soundlessly. “That’s a no, then?”
“You’re huge!” he says, finally finding his voice, and she has to blink.
“Doctor!” She’s trying to muster up some anger, but he’s whipped on his glasses and is staring at her belly as if he’s expecting it’ll change suddenly. She waddles over, best she can, and swats his arm playfully. “Your bloody fault, you know.”
“Yes, well... wait, what? My fault? How is that my fault?” He waves ineffectively, eyes still glued to her middle. “I mean... you’re huge! Just look at you! Big as a house, you are. Leave you here for five minutes and you’re... I mean... How can that possibly be my fault?”
“Did you hit your head?” she asks, only slightly concerned. “Lose your balance and knock it on the way in?”
“What? No, of course not. My head is fine. Perfect. Balance is too, thank you. Vision’s a little funny, sure, but not that poor. You, on the other hand, are... huge! You've a got a baby be- a belly. A big one. It's pointing at me. Not that I mind, you see, but how the hell did that happen?”
“Are you sure you didn’t knock your head,” she asks, running her hand over his scalp. “It’s been swollen for months now, so I wouldn’t be surprised if you’d smacked it on the door on your way in.”
A frown crinkles his brow and he reaches inside his coat, fumbling for his sonic screwdriver with one hand. “I leave you alone for five minutes and you’re... when you can't be. So there must be something wrong. Are you sick? Did you eat something? Swallowing something? Someone, maybe? A whole tribe of someones, perhaps. Because you obviously can’t be... I mean... you’re not.”
Her eyes sparkle with sudden understanding and she waits a beat before replying. “Are you sure it’s been five minutes?”
He blinks. “It’s still May?”
She nods.
“And it’s 2006?”
She shakes her head. “No.”
“Oh,” he says, realisation springing on him like a smack in the face. His eyes widen even further as he waves at her belly. “And that’s my fault?”
“Entirely.”
He grins. “Oh, that’s brilliant.”
Title: Bump
Author: christn7
Rating: G
Characters: Ten/Rose
Summary: She waddles over, best she can, and swats him on the arm. “Your bloody fault, you know.”
Bump
--
“Did you get my ice cream?” Rose asks, eyeing the Doctor and his suspiciously empty hands. She waits, ever so patiently, for him to answer but he just stands in her mother’s doorway, staring at her with wide eyes.
His mouth moves soundlessly. “That’s a no, then?”
“You’re huge!” he says, finally finding his voice, and she has to blink.
“Doctor!” She’s trying to muster up some anger, but he’s whipped on his glasses and is staring at her belly as if he’s expecting it’ll change suddenly. She waddles over, best she can, and swats his arm playfully. “Your bloody fault, you know.”
“Yes, well... wait, what? My fault? How is that my fault?” He waves ineffectively, eyes still glued to her middle. “I mean... you’re huge! Just look at you! Big as a house, you are. Leave you here for five minutes and you’re... I mean... How can that possibly be my fault?”
“Did you hit your head?” she asks, only slightly concerned. “Lose your balance and knock it on the way in?”
“What? No, of course not. My head is fine. Perfect. Balance is too, thank you. Vision’s a little funny, sure, but not that poor. You, on the other hand, are... huge! You've a got a baby be- a belly. A big one. It's pointing at me. Not that I mind, you see, but how the hell did that happen?”
“Are you sure you didn’t knock your head,” she asks, running her hand over his scalp. “It’s been swollen for months now, so I wouldn’t be surprised if you’d smacked it on the door on your way in.”
A frown crinkles his brow and he reaches inside his coat, fumbling for his sonic screwdriver with one hand. “I leave you alone for five minutes and you’re... when you can't be. So there must be something wrong. Are you sick? Did you eat something? Swallowing something? Someone, maybe? A whole tribe of someones, perhaps. Because you obviously can’t be... I mean... you’re not.”
Her eyes sparkle with sudden understanding and she waits a beat before replying. “Are you sure it’s been five minutes?”
He blinks. “It’s still May?”
She nods.
“And it’s 2006?”
She shakes her head. “No.”
“Oh,” he says, realisation springing on him like a smack in the face. His eyes widen even further as he waves at her belly. “And that’s my fault?”
“Entirely.”
He grins. “Oh, that’s brilliant.”