Slightly Outside of Jurisdiction (2/3)
Title: Slightly Outside of Jurisdiction (2/3)
Author: tcbg77
Fandom: Criminal Minds and Legend of the Seeker (crossover)
Pairings: JJ/Emily and Kahlan/Cara
Rating: PG-13
Summary: It's D&D for reals, y'all! What do fake dragons, excessive sartorial speculation, amateurish psychological analysis, totally gratuitous uses of battle wounds and/or woodchopping as stand-ins for sex, and a largely unnecessary and convoluted plot have in common? They're all in this fic!
Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds or Legend of the Seeker
A/N: You guys, this might be the most ridiculous thing I've ever written. Not because it's an AU where hot FBI agents travel to the LotS fantasy land, because that's just good fun, but because I think I actually got kind of into it and decided to devote time to things like epic battle porn. Parts are utterly, unforgivably silly.
Part 1
"Fuuuuck," was all Emily could manage as she stared down at the corpse with its magical forehead of fire.
"I know," JJ agreed miserably. "This is not good." She rubbed her temples where she was afraid a migraine was beginning to settle. Prentiss turned towards JJ, a question in her face.
"I don’t know if we're hallucinating, or if you're not really here and I'm sitting in a padded cell rocking back and forth and talking to my bedpost, or if we really did get sucked into some kind of fantasy world. But whatever the case, I think it's time we stop pretending that magic doesn't exist and that all of this isn't, on some level, real."
JJ took a deep breath, then exhaled.
"For the record, I don't like magic. At all. But for now, you're right. I don't think we have any other option than to just go with this." Emily nodded and then turned towards Cara and Kahlan, who were eyeing them curiously.
"Well?" Cara asked impatiently. "What do you think?"
"I think someone really doesn't like women," Emily responded tersely. "But I can't tell you much more until we see the other bodies."
"There's only one other one to see," Kahlan interjected. "The second woman has a similar mage-mark on her forehead, so no one dared bury her, though they did cast a preservation spell to keep her from…deteriorating."
"What about the first victim?" JJ asked.
"She was cut across the throat like the other two, but the word 'Harlot' was carved into her forehead with a knife, not with a rune. She's buried in her family plot." Kahlan's voice was filled with sympathy, but her eyes also held a hint of determined anger that suggested she would not rest until something very unpleasant was done to the perpetrator of the crime.
"Interesting," JJ was musing. "The unsub is escalating, making his murders more ostentatious, trying to get people's attention."
"Well, he got it," Cara spat, looking down at the body. "And what's an 'unsub?'
"An unknown subject of an investigation," JJ explained. "It's what we call a person who commits a crime before we know his or her identity."
"What's wrong with using 'killer'?" Cara asked, her voice holding a trace of derision at the profilers' terminology.
"Does it look like this person is just a killer?" Emily snapped, then drew in a breath and steadied her voice. "Look, if you want our help, you need to respect our methods."
"I still think this would be faster if you would just confess some villagers," Cara said, turning towards Kahlan. Then her expression turned wheedling. "Or, better yet, let me talk to some of them?" By the way she touched her agiels, Emily could tell that Cara's version of 'talking' would not be particularly enjoyable for both parties.
"Cara," Kahlan said warningly. "We summoned them-let's see how they can help."
"Fine," Cara pouted. "But I can't make any promises for when we find the man."
"Yes, we probably are looking for a man," Emily said, frowning and kneeling beside the victim's body. She looked up at Kahlan. "Can you describe the other two victims? Did they have anything in common-age, skin color, hair color, level of wealth, occupation?"
"Well, the first, Emma, was 17, the second was 21, and Alda here is-was-20. All were pale-skinned, different hair colors. None were particularly wealthy, though none were overly poor. Jessmin was a seamstress, Alda helped at the local bar, and Emma helped her family on her farm. None of them knew each other in more than a passing way." Emily nodded and stood up, looking at JJ.
"What do you think?"
"Intimate method of killing suggests a man, one with some deep-seated issues with women," JJ mused. "Based on his victims and precedent, probably white. Although," she frowned, "it's not like a murderer here would have many other options. Have you noticed any non-white people here?" Emily shrugged.
"A few, but that just means it's even more likely we've got a caucasian unsub. You thinking middle-class?"
"Yeah, probably insubstantial wealth and a menial job exacerbate his need to demonstrate control. Though what exactly does having less wealth mean here? You own fewer cows?" Emily snorted.
"Something like that. Probably suffered early trauma in childhood, likely lost one or both of his parents." She turned to Cara and Kahlan, who were glancing questioningly back and forth between them. "What's the deal with these runes? Can anyone use them?"
"No," Kahlan answered. "Only those with at least a bit of magic in their blood. Those with enough magic become wizards, but many people have only a trace of magic-enough to activate magical talismans, but not much else."
"Are the talismans expensive?" JJ asked.
"Yes, depending on how powerful they are. And the ones used here were fairly powerful." JJ pursed her lips, then looked towards Emily for confirmation, who nodded an unspoken agreement.
"So we're looking for a white male between the age of 18 and 35 who possesses a moderate level of magical ability. He probably works at a menial job, but he makes enough money to live a comfortable lifestyle. His parents were likely killed when he was young, and his relationships with women, if he's had any, have been largely disastrous. He may be impotent and he doesn't like to draw attention to himself, but he's prone to sudden outbursts of anger before he retreats back to a more submissive demeanor."
"How do you know this?" Kahlan asked, her expression incredulous. JJ and Emily exchanged a look.
"Magic," they answered in unison.
When they left the hut, it was already dark. Jathmin appeared at their sides and ushered them towards his home, where his wife brought them some sort of stew that, despite Emily and JJ's trepidation, turned out to be pretty good.
As they were leaving Jathmin's home, he stopped the four of them and handed Emily and JJ a bundle of clothing.
"I saw that you had no extra clothing, and I thought you would like some fresh garments. Particularly as you seem to have, ah, encountered some trouble." And he looked pointedly at JJ's shirt, the bottom half of which was shredded and stained with blood. JJ flushed-she had almost forgotten, amid all the excitement. "I also included some medicine for your wound, as well as one of these for each of you." And he held out four necklaces for each of the women to take. "These are protection talismans," he explained. "They don't provide protection from physical threats, but they dull the power of other magic."
"Thank you," Kahlan said warmly, taking his hand. "We already have a better idea of who is doing this-in the morning we should be able to pursue our suspects."
"Just let me know if I can help," Jathmin replied, waving them off.
Kahlan and Cara accompanied Emily and JJ to their sleeping quarters.
"I'm sorry they couldn't provide you with roomier accommodations," Kahlan said apologetically at the entrance to the single-room building. "Space is tight at the moment-there's a large trade show here and many beds are filled. But I personally saw to it that you received the most comfortable furs the village could offer." Emily peered into the room, where a single bed and a solitary table filled the space.
"I'm sure it will be fine," she said graciously. And, in truth, they'd probably slept in worse hotel rooms while on a case.
"Do you need anything else?" Kahlan asked.
"No, thank you," JJ said warmly. "Hopefully tomorrow we'll be able to make more headway."
"I hope so too." Kahlan turned towards the thus-far silent Cara. "Ready?"
"Yes," Cara replied laconically. Then she spoke to JJ and Emily. "And I would suggest you keep your weapons near-it would be inconvenient if something were to happen to you."
"We will," Emily said, repressing a smile. She suspected this was the closest to a warm 'goodnight' they would ever get from the woman. JJ and Prentiss watched as Cara and Kahlan walked off together into the night, just catching Kahlan's,
"I liked what you did to that fourth D'Haran-do you think you could show me the spinning side kick you used?" And they didn't miss the way Cara dipped her head in thinly-veiled pleasure at the compliment before the shadows swallowed them up.
"Well," JJ said, letting out a breath. "This might be one of the longer days I've ever had."
"Mm," Emily said in agreement, turning to follow JJ into the room. She dumped her bundle on the solitary chair and rifled through it-a large white tunic, probably for sleeping, and another shirt and breeches. She crinkled her nose at the latter two. She was going to do her damndest to dress like an employee of the FBI-it would help her cling to at least some small shred of normalcy. But there was no point in getting her shirt wrinkled in sleep, so she quickly unbuttoned it and slipped on the sleeping-tunic. Then she heard a slight hiss of pain from JJ. She turned to see the other woman attempting to do what Emily had just done, but some of the fabric had apparently stuck to the wound.
"Oh, JJ," Emily said in consternation, quickly closing the distance between them. "I'm so sorry-I wasn't even thinking. Let me help." JJ nodded, dropping her hands to her sides, and Emily gently undid the last few buttons of the shirt. As delicately as she could, she peeled off the part of the shirt nearest the wound. Then she rose and slid her hands along JJ's shoulders, slipping the shirt off her arms and letting it fall to the ground. She swallowed as her hands met JJ's skin, averting her eyes from the sight of JJ standing before her in only her bra, even as she tried to hide the fact that she was averting her gaze. She mentally shook herself and steadied her expression-she wasn't the compartmentalizing queen for nothing.
She turned to look around the room and spotted a basin and cloth. She moved over to it and dipped the cloth in the water, then grabbed the medicine from JJ's bundle and returned to her side.
"It doesn't look too bad," she told JJ reassuringly, kneeling in front of her to examine the cut. "It should heal just fine." JJ nodded but didn't say anything. "This might sting," Emily added, and she felt JJ's hand settle on her shoulder for support. Carefully, Emily ran the wet cloth over the wound, ensuring it was clean. JJ's hand on her shoulder tightened slightly, but that was her only sign of discomfort. Then she took out the medicine-some kind of salve-and applied it to JJ's belly, making her touch as delicate as she could. When she finished, she let her fingers run lightly across JJ's stomach one final time, as if to reassure herself that she had done everything she could. Then she looked up at JJ, about to tell her she was finished. JJ's eyes were closed, her lips half-parted, and her chest was moving up and down in slight, erratic movements. Emily's eyes went wide. Was that…arousal? No, it couldn't be. Emily had always had largely-unexamined feelings for JJ that she generally did her best to ignore, but never in a million years did she think JJ returned those feelings. And even now, she wasn't sure if she was letting her own desires cloud her perceptions, so she cleared her throat and stood up. JJ opened her eyes and Emily thought she detected a faint flush to her cheeks.
"Does it look ok?"
"Yeah," Emily said, smiling. "Supposedly that's magic medicine, so maybe you'll be magically healed by tomorrow." Instead of laughing, JJ sighed.
"You know, I know we should be trying to figure out this other world magic stuff, but I'm exhausted, and I don't have the energy to contradict what my eyes are seeing. Are you ready to turn in?"
"Sure," Prentiss said easily. "Do you, um, need some help with your shirt?"
"What?" JJ asked, then looked down and the flush to her cheeks deepened. "Would you mind?"
"Not at all," and Emily held out JJ's white tunic for JJ to slip on. Then JJ took off her bra from under her shirt, a strangely chaste high-school maneuver, but Emily didn't question it.
The two of them slipped into the bed which was, thankfully, softer than they expected. Emily leaned over to blow out the candle on bed-side table and they were suddenly cast into darkness. Though the bed wasn't large, they had at least two feet between them. Despite the distance, Emily could almost feel the heat radiating from the other side of the bed, and she had a sudden urge to close the distance between them and wrap JJ up in her arms. Though she almost immediately dismissed the thought, she wondered if that brief flash she had seen in JJ's eyes meant she was thinking the same thing. After a moment, she heard JJ's tentative voice.
"Emily?"
"Yes?" Prentiss responded softly, expectantly.
"Have you noticed that a lot of people here sound Australian? I don't know if that means anything, but I thought I should mention it." Emily suppressed a self-deprecating laugh and buried her face in the pillow.
"Yeah, Jayje, I thought I noticed that. We can investigate it tomorrow."
"Ok," JJ responded sleepily. "Goodnight."
"Goodnight, JJ."
When Emily woke up, she felt the chill of morning tracing fingers of cold up her back, but her front was strangely warm. She opened her eyes and was met by a mess of tousled blonde hair. She blinked and moved her head back a bit. JJ was tucked into the curve of her body, her head resting easily just below Emily's chin. They had somehow ended up like this in the night, Emily's left arm loosely encircling JJ's waist. Emily took a moment to marvel at how perfectly they fit, how easy it would be to kiss JJ just under her ear, to hold her tighter and bury her face in her neck. But then she sighed, her breath barely tickling across the fine hairs at JJ's nape. She was glad JJ was still sleeping, because this might require some explaining, and at the very least a very awkward awakening.
As carefully as she could, Emily disentangled her limbs from JJ's and slid off the bed, suppressing a little shiver as her feet hit the cold ground. She reached over to one of the furs that had been kicked off the bed during the night and carefully placed it over JJ. Then she took off her tunic and put her red collared shirt back on and buckled her gun around her waist. She breathed a sigh of relief as she did so-somehow she felt more complete now.
Yawning, she opened the door and stepped outside, squinting at the morning light. Almost immediately, she caught sight of Kahlan, who was clothed in the same dress as before, holding a bundle in her hands and staring off to her left. Emily cleared her throat.
"G'morning." Kahlan started at the noise, then turned to Emily with a smile.
"Good morning, Emily," she said. "I hope you slept well."
"You know, I actually did," Prentiss responded, a touch of surprise to her voice.
"Is JJ up?" Kahlan inquired.
"Not yet," Emily replied. Kahlan nodded and held up her bundle.
"I brought you breakfast. Jathmin's wife makes excellent pastries."
"Thank you," Emily said, reaching for the parcel. They stood together companionably for a moment, feeling the crisp morning air and watching as the remnants of the colorful dawn faded with the rising sun. Suddenly, Emily heard a loud "thwack" and looked to her left, to where Kahlan had been looking before Emily interrupted her. There she saw Cara, blonde hair glinting as the morning light danced off her, attacking a piece of wood with an ax as if the wood was personally responsible for the death of her father. There was another "thwack" as her ax fell and the log she was chopping split in two, the force of her blow sending one of the pieces flying.
"Isn't it a little early to be chopping wood?" Emily asked, raising her eyebrows. "And isn't there already enough kindling?" She nodded towards a not insignificant stack leaning against the wall.
"That's just Cara," Kahlan said with an indulgent smile as she watched the other woman work. "Sometimes she has a lot of…energy…she needs to get rid of. I find chopping wood is less destructive than certain other methods." Instead of watching Cara, Emily watched Kahlan watching Cara. She had to bite back a smile as she noticed how the other woman's gaze seemed to linger on the play of Cara's muscles beneath her leather, how she seemed a little too interested in the single bead of sweat that ran down Cara's face, and on the way she brushed her hair from her eyes before taking another swing. Realizing they couldn't stand here forever, Emily ventured,
"Kahlan?"
"Hm? What?" Kahlan said, jolting out of her reverie. She cleared her throat. "Yes?"
"Once JJ is up, I think we'd like to meet with Emma's parents. In cases like these, the unsub often has a personal connection to the first victim."
"Of course," Kahlan said. "We'll be here when you two are ready." Emily cast a last look at Cara, who she had to admit looked pretty good swinging an ax, and then reentered the building.
To her surprise, JJ was already up. She was wearing the shirt Jathmin had provided her, a loose-fitting white cotton garment that JJ had tucked into the black pants she had been wearing yesterday morning. It was really a men's shirt-its v-neck dipped a little too much for female modesty-but it fit JJ well, and Emily found herself wishing JJ would adopt this look for the office.
JJ looked up when Emily came in and a wave of relief crossed her face.
"I'm glad you're back. I was pretty sure you just stepped out, but you never know with the way things are here."
"Sorry about that," Emily apologized. Then she held out Kahlan's bag. "I brought breakfast."
They ate the pastries-they tasted like a mixture between raisin scones and apple danishes-on the bed, brushing the crumbs off the coverlet when they were done.
"How's your cut?" Emily asked when the finished.
"I can't believe I forgot to tell you!" JJ exclaimed. She lifted her shirt so Emily could see the cut, which was now almost just a scar. Emily whistled and reached out to touch it tentatively.
"It's like it healed a week in one night."
"I know," JJ agreed. "I'm seriously starting to reconsider my position on this whole magic thing." Emily murmured her agreement, then brushed her hands off.
"So I spoke to Kahlan, and they're ready to visit Emma's mother whenever we are." JJ nodded, then reached over to grab her gun off the side table. She strapped it to her side, the combination of her suit-pants, gun, and flowy white shirt giving her the odd appearance of an FBI-pirate hybrid.
"Let's go."
Kahlan and Cara were waiting for them outside, Cara's relatively calm expression an indication that her wood-chopping had served its purpose. They all walked across the village, past Jathmin's house, a number of small shops, and an awful lot of chickens. Kahlan spent the walk trying to fill the two profilers in on the situation in the Midlands, who the Seeker was, and what the Keeper wanted. It all sounded hopelessly complicated, and, quite frankly, ridiculous.
Finally they arrived outside a small, neat thatched house. Kahlan knocked on the door.
"Mistress Henna? This is the Mother Confessor. Would you mind if we asked you a few questions?" A moment later, the door creaked open and they were met by two frightened eyes staring out.
"M-Mother Confessor," the woman stuttered, trying to open the door wider and curtsy at the same time, and succeeding at neither. "P-please, come in." Kahlan smiled at her reassuringly and the four of them trekked inside, almost filling the tiny central room with its one table.
"How can I help you?" the woman asked in an awed tone of voice.
"We're trying to find out who might have wanted to hurt your daughter," Kahlan replied. "Emily and JJ here are trying to help us, and they have a few questions for you."
"It's about Emma?" The woman asked. "What do you want to know?"
"First of all, is there anyone who might have wanted to hurt her?" Emily asked, taking over.
"No," Henna replied, shaking her head. "Emma was a sweet girl-no one hated her."
"What about boys?" JJ interjected gently. "Was there any boy who took a particular interest in her?" The woman hesitated. Then her eyes flickered to Kahlan and Cara and she shook her head mutely. Emily cleared her throat.
"Henna, why don't you talk to JJ. I need to discuss a few things with Cara and Kahlan." The two women looked at Emily quizzically as she ushered them outside.
"What was that about?" Cara asked irritably.
"I think it would be best if you two sit this one out," Emily said tactfully. "That woman is clearly intimidated by you, and she'll open up more if she can just talk to JJ. Trust me, JJ's very good at this kind of thing."
"Why should she be intimidated by us?" Cara asked, frowning. "You would think she'd be happy to have people helping her who want to tear out the heart of her daughter's killer and eat it like a shadrin liver." Emily blanched at that image, but Kahlan eyed Cara in amusement.
"I thought you considered catching this man the equivalent of prying a thorn from a horse's hoof." Cara shrugged.
"I just don’t like the idea of someone killing indiscriminately unless it's me. In the service of the Seeker, of course."
"Of course," Kahlan responded seriously, the corners of her mouth twitching upwards.
It wasn't long before JJ came through the door.
"Find anything out?" Emily inquired. JJ nodded.
"There was a boy, named Krais. He tried to woo Emma, but she rejected him-apparently she felt like there was something off about him. Sounds like he was normally shy, but did a couple of nasty things when she rejected him. Also, both his parents died in the war. Or one of the wars." JJ furrowed her brow. "You seem to have a lot of wars."
Emily "Hmm'd."
"Well that sounds a lot like a potential unsub. Did she tell you where he lives?"
"Yes. You should go check him out, but I think I'd like to stay here and see if I can get more information." Emily frowned.
"I don't know, JJ. I don't like the idea of leaving you alone here."
"I can take care of myself, Emily," JJ responded dryly.
"Trust me, I know," Prentiss said with an appeasing smile. "But you have to admit a little caution in this place wouldn't be the worst idea."
"I'll stay with her, if you're so concerned," Cara said coolly. "I don't understand why you're so worried about leaving her with one feeble old woman, but if it will make this all go faster, I'll stay behind."
"That would be appreciated," Emily responded, surprised that after knowing Cara for only a day she already felt more relaxed knowing she was near JJ.
"Fine with me," JJ said. "I hope you don't mind, but it might be best if you remain outside while I talk to Henna." Cara shrugged noncommittally.
"That's settled then," Kahlan said. "Emily and I will visit Krais-you can meet up with us when you're done." She and Emily turned and began walking in the direction they had come, Emily feeling strangely as if she had just gained a new partner.
As the walked, Kahlan looked at Emily.
"You mustn't mind Cara, you know. I know she comes across as a bit…abrasive, but she has a good heart. She's just had a rather tough upbringing-all Mord'Sith do.
"I don't doubt it," Emily responded. "Early separation from her parents? Physically and emotionally abusive childhood? Inculcated into some kind of gang mentality that demanded violent physical prowess but proscribed emotional displays of affection?" Kahlan blinked.
"How did you know?"
Emily smiled.
"She exhibits textbook signs of displaced fear, avoidance, and trust inhibitions. I'm surprised she functions as well as she does, frankly. She seems fond of you, though." Kahlan dismissed Emily's somewhat suggestive comment with a shrug.
"She's attached to all of us-Richard, Zedd, me-even though she tries not to show it. You should have seen her a year ago," Kahlan continued with a chuckle. "At least she's not trying to kill us anymore." Emily felt that last comment deserved a little further delving into, but her next words were interrupted by a terrible, inhuman shrieking followed by screams of fear. She looked towards where the sound originated from and her mouth fell open.
There, standing not a hundred yards from them, was an twenty-foot-long lizard-like beast with wings, its shimmering scales a fluctuating mixture of cerulean blue and emerald green. In its deadly-looking talons it held the remnants of some unfortunate villager, and its elongated muzzle was flecked with blood.
"A Valkin," Kahlan hissed, drawing one of her knives.
"A Valkin my ass!" Emily yelped. "Where I come from we call that a dragon!" Emily drew her gun and took aim, about to fire on the beast, when Kahlan held out a restraining hand.
"Your weapon won't do any good. The Valkin's scales are impenetrable. The only way to wound it is by piercing the vulnerable skin in between its scales. Unfortunately, that means you have to be very close to it."
"How close?" Emily asked suspiciously. Kahlan twirled one of her knives and grinned.
"Very."
Just then, a soldier dashed by them, panic clear in his eyes. Several other soldiers were holding the Valkin at bay, but none could get close enough to do any damage. Kahlan reached out to grab the panting soldier, and he looked as if he was terrified that she would send him back into the fray.
"Give me your sword," Kahlan commanded curtly. Wordlessly, the man fumbled at his belt and handed the sword and sheath to her, then took off running again. Kahlan drew the sword, and then to Emily's extreme consternation, handed it to her hilt-first. Emily's hand automatically closed around the handle.
"What the hell am I supposed to do with this?" she demanded, her voice reaching a high pitch she hadn't realize she was capable of achieving.
"I should think that would be obvious," Kahlan replied with a quirk of her lips, and Emily wanted to smack that smirk right off her face, a smirk that was a clear indication of just how much Cara had rubbed off on her. Then Kahlan's expression softened. "This isn't your battle-I'm just giving you the option. Now I really need to go before that thing kills another person." And with that, she took off running towards the Valkin, drawing her second knife as she did so. Emily stared at the sword in her hand, a battered but undeniably sharp weapon that felt solid and evenly-balanced on her palm.
"Fuck me," Emily breathed. Then, swallowing hard and with her heart pounding, she followed after Kahlan.
Apparently, Valkins are not easy to kill. This did not particularly surprise Emily Prentiss.*
Emily slowed as she reached the animal, taking stock of the situation. Several soldiers were making jabs at it, and two had already fallen victim to its talons and teeth. Kahlan was circling it warily, searching for openings. At this distance, Emily could see better what she had meant when she described the thing's armor. The blades of the soldiers bounced off its skin with no effect, but each time the animal moved, its scales shifted and Emily could see the fleshy crevices where the scales overlapped. Kahlan finished her circuit and arrived at Emily's side.
"Glad you made up your mind," she said, her eyes never leaving the monster. "I think it's most vulnerable behind its neck. If you can distract it for long enough, I think I can kill it."
"Distract it?" Emily replied, swallowing hard. Then she squared her shoulders as she felt an odd thrill of excitement run through her-you don't read The Lord of the Rings as many times as she had as a child and not have at least some fantasy about slaying a dragon. "Ok," she continued, inhaling and nodding resolutely. She moved towards the dragon's (to hell with "Valkin's", she thought) head. It already seemed pretty distracted by the soldiers, but Emily knew Kahlan needed it focusing on one fixed point in the same way the BAU team often used a diversion to divide the attention of an armed unsub. She cleared her throat.
"Hey, uh, dragon," she called. The Valkin ignored her. Emily tried again. "Hey!" she shouted. The dragon's head whipped around until its yellow, cat-like eyes were staring right at her. "Oh, shit," Emily breathed, just before the Valkin lunged at her.
Just in time, she brought up her sword and swung it so it connected with the animal's face. The blade ricocheted off the dragon's muzzle and Emily felt the vibrations run up her hands and all the way down to her toes. The blow forced the Valkin's head to retreat, but it didn't seem particularly fazed. Out of the corner of her eye, Emily could see Kahlan hovering with knives drawn, waiting for the moment to spring. Emily realized that no matter how hard she hit the Valkin, it would have little more effect than slapping a puppy with a rolled-up newspaper. So, deciding to fall back on what she knew, she plunged the sword blade into the ground and in one fluid motion drew her Glock. The Valkin was already coming towards her for a second try. Aiming coolly, Emily squeezed the trigger and shot the thing square in the eye. It was relatively effective.
The dragon screamed in rage and pain as blood dripped from its now useless left eye. And that's when Kahlan sprang, leaping onto its back and burying both knives at the base of its neck. The Valkin reared, tossing Kahlan off. Emily's relief that Kahlan had made contact disappeared when she realized the knives might not have penetrated far enough-the wounded animal was still deadly, swinging a talon out almost haphazardly to crash into one of the soldiers. Steeling herself, Emily holstered her gun and drew her sword out of the ground. Waiting until the dragon was looking in the opposite direction, Emily drew a deep breath and closed the distance between them. Flipping the sword over so its point faced down, Emily held the sword in both hands and plunged it into the Valkin's side, just at the point where two of its scales met. The blade sank in almost to the hilt, and the Valkin gave one last primal scream before collapsing to the ground.
Emily stood, breathing heavily and staring down at the dead monster's side where a dark blue puddle of blood was forming. Suddenly, she heard someone call her name. Turning, she saw JJ belting towards her. JJ stopped just in front of Emily, her eyes wild.
"Are you alright?" she gasped, her hands almost unconsciously running over different parts of Emily, ensuring that she was all in one piece.
"I-I don't know," Emily managed, still in a daze. Having assured herself that Emily had no visible injuries, JJ suddenly drew her into a strong, tight hug. Emily's eyes cleared and she let herself wrap her arms around the other woman, enjoying the much-needed solidity. Then JJ pulled away from her, clenched her fist, and punched Emily in the shoulder.
"What the hell were you thinking, Prentiss?" she demanded, glaring at her fiercely. "A sword?"
"I, uh, guess I wasn't thinking," Emily replied, wincing and rubbing her shoulder.
"Emily, you killed a fucking dragon." And now JJ's voice had more incredulity to it than anger.
"A Valkin, actually," corrected Cara, who stood not far behind JJ. They both ignored her.
"I know," said Emily, grinning weakly. "I'm still processing that."
"You were wonderful," came Kahlan's voice as she walked up to them, cleaning dark blue Valkin blood from one of her knives. "It was a little harder to slay than I thought it would be." Emily snorted at that understatement.
"I can't believe you killed a Valkin without me," Cara accused Kahlan, a pout to her voice. Kahlan sighed.
"I promise that next time I meet a deadly monster I'll let it kill a few more innocent people and wait for you to catch up."
"Really?" Cara asked hopefully.
"No." Kahlan responded, shaking her head in exasperation. Then she frowned. "What I want to know is what a Valkin was doing here in the first place. They usually stick to the countryside and prey on farm animals." Kahlan moved closer to the hulk of the dead monster, the others following behind. She examined the beast's face, and then her eyes widened.
"Do you see that?" she said, pointing to its forehead where they could just make out the faint trace of a star symbol etched into its scales. "That's a mage mark-someone summoned it here to kill us."
Emily sighed. The damn plot just insisted on thickening.
To be continued…
*And thus begins perhaps the most ludicrous passage of my life: Emily Prentiss fights a dragon with a sword.
Part 3
Author: tcbg77
Fandom: Criminal Minds and Legend of the Seeker (crossover)
Pairings: JJ/Emily and Kahlan/Cara
Rating: PG-13
Summary: It's D&D for reals, y'all! What do fake dragons, excessive sartorial speculation, amateurish psychological analysis, totally gratuitous uses of battle wounds and/or woodchopping as stand-ins for sex, and a largely unnecessary and convoluted plot have in common? They're all in this fic!
Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds or Legend of the Seeker
A/N: You guys, this might be the most ridiculous thing I've ever written. Not because it's an AU where hot FBI agents travel to the LotS fantasy land, because that's just good fun, but because I think I actually got kind of into it and decided to devote time to things like epic battle porn. Parts are utterly, unforgivably silly.
Part 1
"Fuuuuck," was all Emily could manage as she stared down at the corpse with its magical forehead of fire.
"I know," JJ agreed miserably. "This is not good." She rubbed her temples where she was afraid a migraine was beginning to settle. Prentiss turned towards JJ, a question in her face.
"I don’t know if we're hallucinating, or if you're not really here and I'm sitting in a padded cell rocking back and forth and talking to my bedpost, or if we really did get sucked into some kind of fantasy world. But whatever the case, I think it's time we stop pretending that magic doesn't exist and that all of this isn't, on some level, real."
JJ took a deep breath, then exhaled.
"For the record, I don't like magic. At all. But for now, you're right. I don't think we have any other option than to just go with this." Emily nodded and then turned towards Cara and Kahlan, who were eyeing them curiously.
"Well?" Cara asked impatiently. "What do you think?"
"I think someone really doesn't like women," Emily responded tersely. "But I can't tell you much more until we see the other bodies."
"There's only one other one to see," Kahlan interjected. "The second woman has a similar mage-mark on her forehead, so no one dared bury her, though they did cast a preservation spell to keep her from…deteriorating."
"What about the first victim?" JJ asked.
"She was cut across the throat like the other two, but the word 'Harlot' was carved into her forehead with a knife, not with a rune. She's buried in her family plot." Kahlan's voice was filled with sympathy, but her eyes also held a hint of determined anger that suggested she would not rest until something very unpleasant was done to the perpetrator of the crime.
"Interesting," JJ was musing. "The unsub is escalating, making his murders more ostentatious, trying to get people's attention."
"Well, he got it," Cara spat, looking down at the body. "And what's an 'unsub?'
"An unknown subject of an investigation," JJ explained. "It's what we call a person who commits a crime before we know his or her identity."
"What's wrong with using 'killer'?" Cara asked, her voice holding a trace of derision at the profilers' terminology.
"Does it look like this person is just a killer?" Emily snapped, then drew in a breath and steadied her voice. "Look, if you want our help, you need to respect our methods."
"I still think this would be faster if you would just confess some villagers," Cara said, turning towards Kahlan. Then her expression turned wheedling. "Or, better yet, let me talk to some of them?" By the way she touched her agiels, Emily could tell that Cara's version of 'talking' would not be particularly enjoyable for both parties.
"Cara," Kahlan said warningly. "We summoned them-let's see how they can help."
"Fine," Cara pouted. "But I can't make any promises for when we find the man."
"Yes, we probably are looking for a man," Emily said, frowning and kneeling beside the victim's body. She looked up at Kahlan. "Can you describe the other two victims? Did they have anything in common-age, skin color, hair color, level of wealth, occupation?"
"Well, the first, Emma, was 17, the second was 21, and Alda here is-was-20. All were pale-skinned, different hair colors. None were particularly wealthy, though none were overly poor. Jessmin was a seamstress, Alda helped at the local bar, and Emma helped her family on her farm. None of them knew each other in more than a passing way." Emily nodded and stood up, looking at JJ.
"What do you think?"
"Intimate method of killing suggests a man, one with some deep-seated issues with women," JJ mused. "Based on his victims and precedent, probably white. Although," she frowned, "it's not like a murderer here would have many other options. Have you noticed any non-white people here?" Emily shrugged.
"A few, but that just means it's even more likely we've got a caucasian unsub. You thinking middle-class?"
"Yeah, probably insubstantial wealth and a menial job exacerbate his need to demonstrate control. Though what exactly does having less wealth mean here? You own fewer cows?" Emily snorted.
"Something like that. Probably suffered early trauma in childhood, likely lost one or both of his parents." She turned to Cara and Kahlan, who were glancing questioningly back and forth between them. "What's the deal with these runes? Can anyone use them?"
"No," Kahlan answered. "Only those with at least a bit of magic in their blood. Those with enough magic become wizards, but many people have only a trace of magic-enough to activate magical talismans, but not much else."
"Are the talismans expensive?" JJ asked.
"Yes, depending on how powerful they are. And the ones used here were fairly powerful." JJ pursed her lips, then looked towards Emily for confirmation, who nodded an unspoken agreement.
"So we're looking for a white male between the age of 18 and 35 who possesses a moderate level of magical ability. He probably works at a menial job, but he makes enough money to live a comfortable lifestyle. His parents were likely killed when he was young, and his relationships with women, if he's had any, have been largely disastrous. He may be impotent and he doesn't like to draw attention to himself, but he's prone to sudden outbursts of anger before he retreats back to a more submissive demeanor."
"How do you know this?" Kahlan asked, her expression incredulous. JJ and Emily exchanged a look.
"Magic," they answered in unison.
When they left the hut, it was already dark. Jathmin appeared at their sides and ushered them towards his home, where his wife brought them some sort of stew that, despite Emily and JJ's trepidation, turned out to be pretty good.
As they were leaving Jathmin's home, he stopped the four of them and handed Emily and JJ a bundle of clothing.
"I saw that you had no extra clothing, and I thought you would like some fresh garments. Particularly as you seem to have, ah, encountered some trouble." And he looked pointedly at JJ's shirt, the bottom half of which was shredded and stained with blood. JJ flushed-she had almost forgotten, amid all the excitement. "I also included some medicine for your wound, as well as one of these for each of you." And he held out four necklaces for each of the women to take. "These are protection talismans," he explained. "They don't provide protection from physical threats, but they dull the power of other magic."
"Thank you," Kahlan said warmly, taking his hand. "We already have a better idea of who is doing this-in the morning we should be able to pursue our suspects."
"Just let me know if I can help," Jathmin replied, waving them off.
Kahlan and Cara accompanied Emily and JJ to their sleeping quarters.
"I'm sorry they couldn't provide you with roomier accommodations," Kahlan said apologetically at the entrance to the single-room building. "Space is tight at the moment-there's a large trade show here and many beds are filled. But I personally saw to it that you received the most comfortable furs the village could offer." Emily peered into the room, where a single bed and a solitary table filled the space.
"I'm sure it will be fine," she said graciously. And, in truth, they'd probably slept in worse hotel rooms while on a case.
"Do you need anything else?" Kahlan asked.
"No, thank you," JJ said warmly. "Hopefully tomorrow we'll be able to make more headway."
"I hope so too." Kahlan turned towards the thus-far silent Cara. "Ready?"
"Yes," Cara replied laconically. Then she spoke to JJ and Emily. "And I would suggest you keep your weapons near-it would be inconvenient if something were to happen to you."
"We will," Emily said, repressing a smile. She suspected this was the closest to a warm 'goodnight' they would ever get from the woman. JJ and Prentiss watched as Cara and Kahlan walked off together into the night, just catching Kahlan's,
"I liked what you did to that fourth D'Haran-do you think you could show me the spinning side kick you used?" And they didn't miss the way Cara dipped her head in thinly-veiled pleasure at the compliment before the shadows swallowed them up.
"Well," JJ said, letting out a breath. "This might be one of the longer days I've ever had."
"Mm," Emily said in agreement, turning to follow JJ into the room. She dumped her bundle on the solitary chair and rifled through it-a large white tunic, probably for sleeping, and another shirt and breeches. She crinkled her nose at the latter two. She was going to do her damndest to dress like an employee of the FBI-it would help her cling to at least some small shred of normalcy. But there was no point in getting her shirt wrinkled in sleep, so she quickly unbuttoned it and slipped on the sleeping-tunic. Then she heard a slight hiss of pain from JJ. She turned to see the other woman attempting to do what Emily had just done, but some of the fabric had apparently stuck to the wound.
"Oh, JJ," Emily said in consternation, quickly closing the distance between them. "I'm so sorry-I wasn't even thinking. Let me help." JJ nodded, dropping her hands to her sides, and Emily gently undid the last few buttons of the shirt. As delicately as she could, she peeled off the part of the shirt nearest the wound. Then she rose and slid her hands along JJ's shoulders, slipping the shirt off her arms and letting it fall to the ground. She swallowed as her hands met JJ's skin, averting her eyes from the sight of JJ standing before her in only her bra, even as she tried to hide the fact that she was averting her gaze. She mentally shook herself and steadied her expression-she wasn't the compartmentalizing queen for nothing.
She turned to look around the room and spotted a basin and cloth. She moved over to it and dipped the cloth in the water, then grabbed the medicine from JJ's bundle and returned to her side.
"It doesn't look too bad," she told JJ reassuringly, kneeling in front of her to examine the cut. "It should heal just fine." JJ nodded but didn't say anything. "This might sting," Emily added, and she felt JJ's hand settle on her shoulder for support. Carefully, Emily ran the wet cloth over the wound, ensuring it was clean. JJ's hand on her shoulder tightened slightly, but that was her only sign of discomfort. Then she took out the medicine-some kind of salve-and applied it to JJ's belly, making her touch as delicate as she could. When she finished, she let her fingers run lightly across JJ's stomach one final time, as if to reassure herself that she had done everything she could. Then she looked up at JJ, about to tell her she was finished. JJ's eyes were closed, her lips half-parted, and her chest was moving up and down in slight, erratic movements. Emily's eyes went wide. Was that…arousal? No, it couldn't be. Emily had always had largely-unexamined feelings for JJ that she generally did her best to ignore, but never in a million years did she think JJ returned those feelings. And even now, she wasn't sure if she was letting her own desires cloud her perceptions, so she cleared her throat and stood up. JJ opened her eyes and Emily thought she detected a faint flush to her cheeks.
"Does it look ok?"
"Yeah," Emily said, smiling. "Supposedly that's magic medicine, so maybe you'll be magically healed by tomorrow." Instead of laughing, JJ sighed.
"You know, I know we should be trying to figure out this other world magic stuff, but I'm exhausted, and I don't have the energy to contradict what my eyes are seeing. Are you ready to turn in?"
"Sure," Prentiss said easily. "Do you, um, need some help with your shirt?"
"What?" JJ asked, then looked down and the flush to her cheeks deepened. "Would you mind?"
"Not at all," and Emily held out JJ's white tunic for JJ to slip on. Then JJ took off her bra from under her shirt, a strangely chaste high-school maneuver, but Emily didn't question it.
The two of them slipped into the bed which was, thankfully, softer than they expected. Emily leaned over to blow out the candle on bed-side table and they were suddenly cast into darkness. Though the bed wasn't large, they had at least two feet between them. Despite the distance, Emily could almost feel the heat radiating from the other side of the bed, and she had a sudden urge to close the distance between them and wrap JJ up in her arms. Though she almost immediately dismissed the thought, she wondered if that brief flash she had seen in JJ's eyes meant she was thinking the same thing. After a moment, she heard JJ's tentative voice.
"Emily?"
"Yes?" Prentiss responded softly, expectantly.
"Have you noticed that a lot of people here sound Australian? I don't know if that means anything, but I thought I should mention it." Emily suppressed a self-deprecating laugh and buried her face in the pillow.
"Yeah, Jayje, I thought I noticed that. We can investigate it tomorrow."
"Ok," JJ responded sleepily. "Goodnight."
"Goodnight, JJ."
When Emily woke up, she felt the chill of morning tracing fingers of cold up her back, but her front was strangely warm. She opened her eyes and was met by a mess of tousled blonde hair. She blinked and moved her head back a bit. JJ was tucked into the curve of her body, her head resting easily just below Emily's chin. They had somehow ended up like this in the night, Emily's left arm loosely encircling JJ's waist. Emily took a moment to marvel at how perfectly they fit, how easy it would be to kiss JJ just under her ear, to hold her tighter and bury her face in her neck. But then she sighed, her breath barely tickling across the fine hairs at JJ's nape. She was glad JJ was still sleeping, because this might require some explaining, and at the very least a very awkward awakening.
As carefully as she could, Emily disentangled her limbs from JJ's and slid off the bed, suppressing a little shiver as her feet hit the cold ground. She reached over to one of the furs that had been kicked off the bed during the night and carefully placed it over JJ. Then she took off her tunic and put her red collared shirt back on and buckled her gun around her waist. She breathed a sigh of relief as she did so-somehow she felt more complete now.
Yawning, she opened the door and stepped outside, squinting at the morning light. Almost immediately, she caught sight of Kahlan, who was clothed in the same dress as before, holding a bundle in her hands and staring off to her left. Emily cleared her throat.
"G'morning." Kahlan started at the noise, then turned to Emily with a smile.
"Good morning, Emily," she said. "I hope you slept well."
"You know, I actually did," Prentiss responded, a touch of surprise to her voice.
"Is JJ up?" Kahlan inquired.
"Not yet," Emily replied. Kahlan nodded and held up her bundle.
"I brought you breakfast. Jathmin's wife makes excellent pastries."
"Thank you," Emily said, reaching for the parcel. They stood together companionably for a moment, feeling the crisp morning air and watching as the remnants of the colorful dawn faded with the rising sun. Suddenly, Emily heard a loud "thwack" and looked to her left, to where Kahlan had been looking before Emily interrupted her. There she saw Cara, blonde hair glinting as the morning light danced off her, attacking a piece of wood with an ax as if the wood was personally responsible for the death of her father. There was another "thwack" as her ax fell and the log she was chopping split in two, the force of her blow sending one of the pieces flying.
"Isn't it a little early to be chopping wood?" Emily asked, raising her eyebrows. "And isn't there already enough kindling?" She nodded towards a not insignificant stack leaning against the wall.
"That's just Cara," Kahlan said with an indulgent smile as she watched the other woman work. "Sometimes she has a lot of…energy…she needs to get rid of. I find chopping wood is less destructive than certain other methods." Instead of watching Cara, Emily watched Kahlan watching Cara. She had to bite back a smile as she noticed how the other woman's gaze seemed to linger on the play of Cara's muscles beneath her leather, how she seemed a little too interested in the single bead of sweat that ran down Cara's face, and on the way she brushed her hair from her eyes before taking another swing. Realizing they couldn't stand here forever, Emily ventured,
"Kahlan?"
"Hm? What?" Kahlan said, jolting out of her reverie. She cleared her throat. "Yes?"
"Once JJ is up, I think we'd like to meet with Emma's parents. In cases like these, the unsub often has a personal connection to the first victim."
"Of course," Kahlan said. "We'll be here when you two are ready." Emily cast a last look at Cara, who she had to admit looked pretty good swinging an ax, and then reentered the building.
To her surprise, JJ was already up. She was wearing the shirt Jathmin had provided her, a loose-fitting white cotton garment that JJ had tucked into the black pants she had been wearing yesterday morning. It was really a men's shirt-its v-neck dipped a little too much for female modesty-but it fit JJ well, and Emily found herself wishing JJ would adopt this look for the office.
JJ looked up when Emily came in and a wave of relief crossed her face.
"I'm glad you're back. I was pretty sure you just stepped out, but you never know with the way things are here."
"Sorry about that," Emily apologized. Then she held out Kahlan's bag. "I brought breakfast."
They ate the pastries-they tasted like a mixture between raisin scones and apple danishes-on the bed, brushing the crumbs off the coverlet when they were done.
"How's your cut?" Emily asked when the finished.
"I can't believe I forgot to tell you!" JJ exclaimed. She lifted her shirt so Emily could see the cut, which was now almost just a scar. Emily whistled and reached out to touch it tentatively.
"It's like it healed a week in one night."
"I know," JJ agreed. "I'm seriously starting to reconsider my position on this whole magic thing." Emily murmured her agreement, then brushed her hands off.
"So I spoke to Kahlan, and they're ready to visit Emma's mother whenever we are." JJ nodded, then reached over to grab her gun off the side table. She strapped it to her side, the combination of her suit-pants, gun, and flowy white shirt giving her the odd appearance of an FBI-pirate hybrid.
"Let's go."
Kahlan and Cara were waiting for them outside, Cara's relatively calm expression an indication that her wood-chopping had served its purpose. They all walked across the village, past Jathmin's house, a number of small shops, and an awful lot of chickens. Kahlan spent the walk trying to fill the two profilers in on the situation in the Midlands, who the Seeker was, and what the Keeper wanted. It all sounded hopelessly complicated, and, quite frankly, ridiculous.
Finally they arrived outside a small, neat thatched house. Kahlan knocked on the door.
"Mistress Henna? This is the Mother Confessor. Would you mind if we asked you a few questions?" A moment later, the door creaked open and they were met by two frightened eyes staring out.
"M-Mother Confessor," the woman stuttered, trying to open the door wider and curtsy at the same time, and succeeding at neither. "P-please, come in." Kahlan smiled at her reassuringly and the four of them trekked inside, almost filling the tiny central room with its one table.
"How can I help you?" the woman asked in an awed tone of voice.
"We're trying to find out who might have wanted to hurt your daughter," Kahlan replied. "Emily and JJ here are trying to help us, and they have a few questions for you."
"It's about Emma?" The woman asked. "What do you want to know?"
"First of all, is there anyone who might have wanted to hurt her?" Emily asked, taking over.
"No," Henna replied, shaking her head. "Emma was a sweet girl-no one hated her."
"What about boys?" JJ interjected gently. "Was there any boy who took a particular interest in her?" The woman hesitated. Then her eyes flickered to Kahlan and Cara and she shook her head mutely. Emily cleared her throat.
"Henna, why don't you talk to JJ. I need to discuss a few things with Cara and Kahlan." The two women looked at Emily quizzically as she ushered them outside.
"What was that about?" Cara asked irritably.
"I think it would be best if you two sit this one out," Emily said tactfully. "That woman is clearly intimidated by you, and she'll open up more if she can just talk to JJ. Trust me, JJ's very good at this kind of thing."
"Why should she be intimidated by us?" Cara asked, frowning. "You would think she'd be happy to have people helping her who want to tear out the heart of her daughter's killer and eat it like a shadrin liver." Emily blanched at that image, but Kahlan eyed Cara in amusement.
"I thought you considered catching this man the equivalent of prying a thorn from a horse's hoof." Cara shrugged.
"I just don’t like the idea of someone killing indiscriminately unless it's me. In the service of the Seeker, of course."
"Of course," Kahlan responded seriously, the corners of her mouth twitching upwards.
It wasn't long before JJ came through the door.
"Find anything out?" Emily inquired. JJ nodded.
"There was a boy, named Krais. He tried to woo Emma, but she rejected him-apparently she felt like there was something off about him. Sounds like he was normally shy, but did a couple of nasty things when she rejected him. Also, both his parents died in the war. Or one of the wars." JJ furrowed her brow. "You seem to have a lot of wars."
Emily "Hmm'd."
"Well that sounds a lot like a potential unsub. Did she tell you where he lives?"
"Yes. You should go check him out, but I think I'd like to stay here and see if I can get more information." Emily frowned.
"I don't know, JJ. I don't like the idea of leaving you alone here."
"I can take care of myself, Emily," JJ responded dryly.
"Trust me, I know," Prentiss said with an appeasing smile. "But you have to admit a little caution in this place wouldn't be the worst idea."
"I'll stay with her, if you're so concerned," Cara said coolly. "I don't understand why you're so worried about leaving her with one feeble old woman, but if it will make this all go faster, I'll stay behind."
"That would be appreciated," Emily responded, surprised that after knowing Cara for only a day she already felt more relaxed knowing she was near JJ.
"Fine with me," JJ said. "I hope you don't mind, but it might be best if you remain outside while I talk to Henna." Cara shrugged noncommittally.
"That's settled then," Kahlan said. "Emily and I will visit Krais-you can meet up with us when you're done." She and Emily turned and began walking in the direction they had come, Emily feeling strangely as if she had just gained a new partner.
As the walked, Kahlan looked at Emily.
"You mustn't mind Cara, you know. I know she comes across as a bit…abrasive, but she has a good heart. She's just had a rather tough upbringing-all Mord'Sith do.
"I don't doubt it," Emily responded. "Early separation from her parents? Physically and emotionally abusive childhood? Inculcated into some kind of gang mentality that demanded violent physical prowess but proscribed emotional displays of affection?" Kahlan blinked.
"How did you know?"
Emily smiled.
"She exhibits textbook signs of displaced fear, avoidance, and trust inhibitions. I'm surprised she functions as well as she does, frankly. She seems fond of you, though." Kahlan dismissed Emily's somewhat suggestive comment with a shrug.
"She's attached to all of us-Richard, Zedd, me-even though she tries not to show it. You should have seen her a year ago," Kahlan continued with a chuckle. "At least she's not trying to kill us anymore." Emily felt that last comment deserved a little further delving into, but her next words were interrupted by a terrible, inhuman shrieking followed by screams of fear. She looked towards where the sound originated from and her mouth fell open.
There, standing not a hundred yards from them, was an twenty-foot-long lizard-like beast with wings, its shimmering scales a fluctuating mixture of cerulean blue and emerald green. In its deadly-looking talons it held the remnants of some unfortunate villager, and its elongated muzzle was flecked with blood.
"A Valkin," Kahlan hissed, drawing one of her knives.
"A Valkin my ass!" Emily yelped. "Where I come from we call that a dragon!" Emily drew her gun and took aim, about to fire on the beast, when Kahlan held out a restraining hand.
"Your weapon won't do any good. The Valkin's scales are impenetrable. The only way to wound it is by piercing the vulnerable skin in between its scales. Unfortunately, that means you have to be very close to it."
"How close?" Emily asked suspiciously. Kahlan twirled one of her knives and grinned.
"Very."
Just then, a soldier dashed by them, panic clear in his eyes. Several other soldiers were holding the Valkin at bay, but none could get close enough to do any damage. Kahlan reached out to grab the panting soldier, and he looked as if he was terrified that she would send him back into the fray.
"Give me your sword," Kahlan commanded curtly. Wordlessly, the man fumbled at his belt and handed the sword and sheath to her, then took off running again. Kahlan drew the sword, and then to Emily's extreme consternation, handed it to her hilt-first. Emily's hand automatically closed around the handle.
"What the hell am I supposed to do with this?" she demanded, her voice reaching a high pitch she hadn't realize she was capable of achieving.
"I should think that would be obvious," Kahlan replied with a quirk of her lips, and Emily wanted to smack that smirk right off her face, a smirk that was a clear indication of just how much Cara had rubbed off on her. Then Kahlan's expression softened. "This isn't your battle-I'm just giving you the option. Now I really need to go before that thing kills another person." And with that, she took off running towards the Valkin, drawing her second knife as she did so. Emily stared at the sword in her hand, a battered but undeniably sharp weapon that felt solid and evenly-balanced on her palm.
"Fuck me," Emily breathed. Then, swallowing hard and with her heart pounding, she followed after Kahlan.
Apparently, Valkins are not easy to kill. This did not particularly surprise Emily Prentiss.*
Emily slowed as she reached the animal, taking stock of the situation. Several soldiers were making jabs at it, and two had already fallen victim to its talons and teeth. Kahlan was circling it warily, searching for openings. At this distance, Emily could see better what she had meant when she described the thing's armor. The blades of the soldiers bounced off its skin with no effect, but each time the animal moved, its scales shifted and Emily could see the fleshy crevices where the scales overlapped. Kahlan finished her circuit and arrived at Emily's side.
"Glad you made up your mind," she said, her eyes never leaving the monster. "I think it's most vulnerable behind its neck. If you can distract it for long enough, I think I can kill it."
"Distract it?" Emily replied, swallowing hard. Then she squared her shoulders as she felt an odd thrill of excitement run through her-you don't read The Lord of the Rings as many times as she had as a child and not have at least some fantasy about slaying a dragon. "Ok," she continued, inhaling and nodding resolutely. She moved towards the dragon's (to hell with "Valkin's", she thought) head. It already seemed pretty distracted by the soldiers, but Emily knew Kahlan needed it focusing on one fixed point in the same way the BAU team often used a diversion to divide the attention of an armed unsub. She cleared her throat.
"Hey, uh, dragon," she called. The Valkin ignored her. Emily tried again. "Hey!" she shouted. The dragon's head whipped around until its yellow, cat-like eyes were staring right at her. "Oh, shit," Emily breathed, just before the Valkin lunged at her.
Just in time, she brought up her sword and swung it so it connected with the animal's face. The blade ricocheted off the dragon's muzzle and Emily felt the vibrations run up her hands and all the way down to her toes. The blow forced the Valkin's head to retreat, but it didn't seem particularly fazed. Out of the corner of her eye, Emily could see Kahlan hovering with knives drawn, waiting for the moment to spring. Emily realized that no matter how hard she hit the Valkin, it would have little more effect than slapping a puppy with a rolled-up newspaper. So, deciding to fall back on what she knew, she plunged the sword blade into the ground and in one fluid motion drew her Glock. The Valkin was already coming towards her for a second try. Aiming coolly, Emily squeezed the trigger and shot the thing square in the eye. It was relatively effective.
The dragon screamed in rage and pain as blood dripped from its now useless left eye. And that's when Kahlan sprang, leaping onto its back and burying both knives at the base of its neck. The Valkin reared, tossing Kahlan off. Emily's relief that Kahlan had made contact disappeared when she realized the knives might not have penetrated far enough-the wounded animal was still deadly, swinging a talon out almost haphazardly to crash into one of the soldiers. Steeling herself, Emily holstered her gun and drew her sword out of the ground. Waiting until the dragon was looking in the opposite direction, Emily drew a deep breath and closed the distance between them. Flipping the sword over so its point faced down, Emily held the sword in both hands and plunged it into the Valkin's side, just at the point where two of its scales met. The blade sank in almost to the hilt, and the Valkin gave one last primal scream before collapsing to the ground.
Emily stood, breathing heavily and staring down at the dead monster's side where a dark blue puddle of blood was forming. Suddenly, she heard someone call her name. Turning, she saw JJ belting towards her. JJ stopped just in front of Emily, her eyes wild.
"Are you alright?" she gasped, her hands almost unconsciously running over different parts of Emily, ensuring that she was all in one piece.
"I-I don't know," Emily managed, still in a daze. Having assured herself that Emily had no visible injuries, JJ suddenly drew her into a strong, tight hug. Emily's eyes cleared and she let herself wrap her arms around the other woman, enjoying the much-needed solidity. Then JJ pulled away from her, clenched her fist, and punched Emily in the shoulder.
"What the hell were you thinking, Prentiss?" she demanded, glaring at her fiercely. "A sword?"
"I, uh, guess I wasn't thinking," Emily replied, wincing and rubbing her shoulder.
"Emily, you killed a fucking dragon." And now JJ's voice had more incredulity to it than anger.
"A Valkin, actually," corrected Cara, who stood not far behind JJ. They both ignored her.
"I know," said Emily, grinning weakly. "I'm still processing that."
"You were wonderful," came Kahlan's voice as she walked up to them, cleaning dark blue Valkin blood from one of her knives. "It was a little harder to slay than I thought it would be." Emily snorted at that understatement.
"I can't believe you killed a Valkin without me," Cara accused Kahlan, a pout to her voice. Kahlan sighed.
"I promise that next time I meet a deadly monster I'll let it kill a few more innocent people and wait for you to catch up."
"Really?" Cara asked hopefully.
"No." Kahlan responded, shaking her head in exasperation. Then she frowned. "What I want to know is what a Valkin was doing here in the first place. They usually stick to the countryside and prey on farm animals." Kahlan moved closer to the hulk of the dead monster, the others following behind. She examined the beast's face, and then her eyes widened.
"Do you see that?" she said, pointing to its forehead where they could just make out the faint trace of a star symbol etched into its scales. "That's a mage mark-someone summoned it here to kill us."
Emily sighed. The damn plot just insisted on thickening.
To be continued…
*And thus begins perhaps the most ludicrous passage of my life: Emily Prentiss fights a dragon with a sword.
Part 3