TORNtainment - Back off (Chapter Five)
Hi, here I am with a new chapter!
Thanks to all of you for your support of this story, I deeply appreciate that ^^
**
Title: TORNtainment
Author: lalois
Fandom: Kanjani8
Pairings: RyOhkura, mention of Ohkura x Yoshitaka Yuriko
Rating: PG-13
Length: chaptered
Words: 1166
Genre: romance, angst, slice-of-life
Disclaimer: sadly I don’t own anything about Kanjani8, just my worship for my OTP.
Prompt: based on real facts happened on 2016 mainly, old and new pieces of Eito summed up together to get a glimpse of the actual relationship/distance (or lack of) between Ryo and Ohkura. Mainly set during the Takoyaki EighterTainment tour.
Summary: is TORN one dead concept? They can't make up, but the EighterTainment tour is opening up...
Written on: 29th January 2017
Previous chapters: 1 - Sayonara wa itsumo, 2 - Kanashii koi, 3 - no-no-no, 4 - Sorry sorry love
Also available on Ao3
**
The Tokyo Dome had welcomed a few more venues for Kanjani8, and Ryo was glad they were over. He felt exhausted, and quite eager he could put some distance between him and Ohkura.
Being physically close to the drummer while feasting with Kanjani8 music felt as much enthralling as sad; he couldn't tell how much he loved sitting at the acoustic session and knowing his favourite band member was right behind him, his drum sticks hitting more strongly than ever.
At the same time, he knew he didn't have to misinterpret Ohkura's excitement. His smiles were addressed to their audience, to Maru and maybe even to him, fleeting and courteously-like, sometimes.
But not the way he wanted it to be, and it crushed his inner self.
He was the worse for fear.
Also, there had been another incident between the two of them.
Ohkura’s missing the sync during the acoustic session had been done on purpose, in order to “eighter-tain” their fans better, but his messed up part during Omoidama was all but expected.
When Ryo had made fun of it like their band mates had, Ohkura had glared bitterly at him only.
"As if it wasn't your fault!" the drummer spit at him.
"EH?! Why me?!" Ryo couldn't believe his ears.
"Wait a moment," Shingo objected, frowning while looking from the guitarist to the drummer and back. "Didn't you make up last time like we severely recommended you to?"
"I can't remember such a thing," Ohkura replied, his voice razor-like.
He looked accusingly at Ryo together with Shingo, and so did the other five Kanjani8 members after some awkward moment of silence.
"Hey, I had apologized already!" Ryo told them, flushing pink at the memory.
"Oh, really? And when should that have happened?" The drummer scornfully asked.
Ryo rolled his eyes.
"Okay, so can we have a little talk right now?" he suggested, gesturing for the corridor beyond the greenroom.
"Oh, I wonder," Ohkura bluntly replied, the sarcasm clear in his velvety voice.
"Please, Ohkura..." Ryo insisted, looking firmly at the drummer's eyes, who openly avoided his piercing gaze. Right then, Maru patted Ohkura not so gently on the back; the latter glared at him in disbelief, but couldn't avoid even Shota's concerned face beside the bassist.
"Alright," he sighed, and followed Ryo outside the room and inside the nearest empty one.
"Okay, listen, I'm sorry for acting like an asshole," Ryo cornered him without wasting any other time. "I am indeed, I know. But I don't want things between us to be visibly awkward on stage also, so if you want me to feel sorry you don't have to worry... because I am, okay?"
"I'd wanna believe you," Ohkura murmured, his voice a little softer than before, "but what happened on stage..." He paused, looking tortured and shaking his head. “It’s distracting me. It’s you! My mistakes, they were your fault,” he insisted.
“Eh?! Are you nuts, Ohkura?! You’ve been the one-"
“YOU have been, Ryochan!" the drummer suddenly cried out, gesticulating. "Whatever thing about me is obsessing you lately, it seems it's fucking distracting me also! And I hate it, for I really don't need any of this for sure right now..." he concluded, sulking aloud. “Leave me alone, can you?! Can you, please?"
Their eyes met. Ohkura looked like he was really and completely at a loss, and his torn expression was what eventually made Ryo feel suddenly bold and resolute about his not reciprocated feelings.
“So there’s something, right?” Ryo questioned him. “Yeah, maybe you’re okay with having a girlfriend because she’s cute and famous and all lovey dovey around you and you're such a diva and everything, but you still haven’t realized you’re... well, not over me yet. Not completely. It troubles you, and that's something, indeed.”
Ohkura looked speechless, his mouth agape in shock.
“I should be what?!”
“You heard me quite well,” Ryo insisted, narrowing his eyes.
“It’s ridiculous," Ohkura pointed out. "That has honestly nothing to do with feelings, Ryochan!"
"I don't think so," Ryo replied, his heart galloping in his chest. He didn't like the way they were talking to each other, but somehow, he also felt like they actually needed it, to cleanse the mutual discomfort away.
"It doesn't," Ohkura stubbornly went on. “Why don’t you get it? It’s scare instead! Yeah, I’m scared, for having to see you acting this miserably around me. Can’t you see it yourself? It’s definitely not like you, Ryochan…” he argued, his voice seriously determined. “I don’t know what’s troubling you lately and I don’t even wanna know, but if you think this has something to do with me, then it’s you who is wrong.” His eyes were flaring, and he looked almost out of breath. Tired, also.
Ohkura looked intensely up at him.
“Because I won’t feel back, Ryochan.”
Ryo swallowed hard.
So Ohkura did know, in the end. Despite the harsh talks, the only thing they seemed to share lately, he had got it right. His hidden feelings, the ones that Ryo was so sure he’d not give so easily away.
Ryo opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. And after an awkward silence, he finally talked.
“Well, at least I know what I really want, Tatsu, and for once, I’m not the one staying oblivious,” he replied, not even bothering to question the truth behind Ohkura’s blunt words. “Maybe one day you’ll realize it too, but maybe it will be already over for us both and for real, and forever.”
"I don't need to realize anything, please," the drummer insisted. "I just need you to stop harass me to no end. Give it a rest, Ryochan… please. Please."
“Oh, you don’t have to worry about that," Ryo told him. “I already promised I’d stop.”
Ohkura raised an eyebrow.
“I don’t even remember such a thing happening, and believe me, I think I would. Were you drunk, Ryochan?”
“You’re not funny, you know...” Ryo whined, scratching his head. But the truth was, that after the stolen kiss incident, he felt all but ready to confess the other what had really happened that night. And for what purpose, even?
In Sapporo, Ryo had secretly told himself that he’d have stopped acting stupidly for him.
It did hurt, having feelings, but it did hurt also feeling like a fool. And it did hurt even more being rejected one day after another, continuously, not to mention seeing Ohkura acting so defensively from him. Maybe that was what hurt him the most.
And maybe he was too tired to fight all by himself a useless war.
"Alright,” he sighed. “You win, Ohkura. I'll stop being a pain in the ass, starting now and forever, okay?"
He looked up at the drummer, who slowly nodded in confirmation.
His lips parted to pronounce a silent thanks of appreciation, and Ryo couldn't help but feel his cheeks going slightly pink during such a sad moment. A moment he thinks he’ll hardly forget.
**
So, about the true facts here, we've got Ohkura fumbling over Roller Coaster at acoustic sessions ;)
Chapter 6 - Monologue
Thanks to all of you for your support of this story, I deeply appreciate that ^^
**
Title: TORNtainment
Author: lalois
Fandom: Kanjani8
Pairings: RyOhkura, mention of Ohkura x Yoshitaka Yuriko
Rating: PG-13
Length: chaptered
Words: 1166
Genre: romance, angst, slice-of-life
Disclaimer: sadly I don’t own anything about Kanjani8, just my worship for my OTP.
Prompt: based on real facts happened on 2016 mainly, old and new pieces of Eito summed up together to get a glimpse of the actual relationship/distance (or lack of) between Ryo and Ohkura. Mainly set during the Takoyaki EighterTainment tour.
Summary: is TORN one dead concept? They can't make up, but the EighterTainment tour is opening up...
Written on: 29th January 2017
Previous chapters: 1 - Sayonara wa itsumo, 2 - Kanashii koi, 3 - no-no-no, 4 - Sorry sorry love
Also available on Ao3
**
The Tokyo Dome had welcomed a few more venues for Kanjani8, and Ryo was glad they were over. He felt exhausted, and quite eager he could put some distance between him and Ohkura.
Being physically close to the drummer while feasting with Kanjani8 music felt as much enthralling as sad; he couldn't tell how much he loved sitting at the acoustic session and knowing his favourite band member was right behind him, his drum sticks hitting more strongly than ever.
At the same time, he knew he didn't have to misinterpret Ohkura's excitement. His smiles were addressed to their audience, to Maru and maybe even to him, fleeting and courteously-like, sometimes.
But not the way he wanted it to be, and it crushed his inner self.
He was the worse for fear.
Also, there had been another incident between the two of them.
Ohkura’s missing the sync during the acoustic session had been done on purpose, in order to “eighter-tain” their fans better, but his messed up part during Omoidama was all but expected.
When Ryo had made fun of it like their band mates had, Ohkura had glared bitterly at him only.
"As if it wasn't your fault!" the drummer spit at him.
"EH?! Why me?!" Ryo couldn't believe his ears.
"Wait a moment," Shingo objected, frowning while looking from the guitarist to the drummer and back. "Didn't you make up last time like we severely recommended you to?"
"I can't remember such a thing," Ohkura replied, his voice razor-like.
He looked accusingly at Ryo together with Shingo, and so did the other five Kanjani8 members after some awkward moment of silence.
"Hey, I had apologized already!" Ryo told them, flushing pink at the memory.
"Oh, really? And when should that have happened?" The drummer scornfully asked.
Ryo rolled his eyes.
"Okay, so can we have a little talk right now?" he suggested, gesturing for the corridor beyond the greenroom.
"Oh, I wonder," Ohkura bluntly replied, the sarcasm clear in his velvety voice.
"Please, Ohkura..." Ryo insisted, looking firmly at the drummer's eyes, who openly avoided his piercing gaze. Right then, Maru patted Ohkura not so gently on the back; the latter glared at him in disbelief, but couldn't avoid even Shota's concerned face beside the bassist.
"Alright," he sighed, and followed Ryo outside the room and inside the nearest empty one.
"Okay, listen, I'm sorry for acting like an asshole," Ryo cornered him without wasting any other time. "I am indeed, I know. But I don't want things between us to be visibly awkward on stage also, so if you want me to feel sorry you don't have to worry... because I am, okay?"
"I'd wanna believe you," Ohkura murmured, his voice a little softer than before, "but what happened on stage..." He paused, looking tortured and shaking his head. “It’s distracting me. It’s you! My mistakes, they were your fault,” he insisted.
“Eh?! Are you nuts, Ohkura?! You’ve been the one-"
“YOU have been, Ryochan!" the drummer suddenly cried out, gesticulating. "Whatever thing about me is obsessing you lately, it seems it's fucking distracting me also! And I hate it, for I really don't need any of this for sure right now..." he concluded, sulking aloud. “Leave me alone, can you?! Can you, please?"
Their eyes met. Ohkura looked like he was really and completely at a loss, and his torn expression was what eventually made Ryo feel suddenly bold and resolute about his not reciprocated feelings.
“So there’s something, right?” Ryo questioned him. “Yeah, maybe you’re okay with having a girlfriend because she’s cute and famous and all lovey dovey around you and you're such a diva and everything, but you still haven’t realized you’re... well, not over me yet. Not completely. It troubles you, and that's something, indeed.”
Ohkura looked speechless, his mouth agape in shock.
“I should be what?!”
“You heard me quite well,” Ryo insisted, narrowing his eyes.
“It’s ridiculous," Ohkura pointed out. "That has honestly nothing to do with feelings, Ryochan!"
"I don't think so," Ryo replied, his heart galloping in his chest. He didn't like the way they were talking to each other, but somehow, he also felt like they actually needed it, to cleanse the mutual discomfort away.
"It doesn't," Ohkura stubbornly went on. “Why don’t you get it? It’s scare instead! Yeah, I’m scared, for having to see you acting this miserably around me. Can’t you see it yourself? It’s definitely not like you, Ryochan…” he argued, his voice seriously determined. “I don’t know what’s troubling you lately and I don’t even wanna know, but if you think this has something to do with me, then it’s you who is wrong.” His eyes were flaring, and he looked almost out of breath. Tired, also.
Ohkura looked intensely up at him.
“Because I won’t feel back, Ryochan.”
Ryo swallowed hard.
So Ohkura did know, in the end. Despite the harsh talks, the only thing they seemed to share lately, he had got it right. His hidden feelings, the ones that Ryo was so sure he’d not give so easily away.
Ryo opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. And after an awkward silence, he finally talked.
“Well, at least I know what I really want, Tatsu, and for once, I’m not the one staying oblivious,” he replied, not even bothering to question the truth behind Ohkura’s blunt words. “Maybe one day you’ll realize it too, but maybe it will be already over for us both and for real, and forever.”
"I don't need to realize anything, please," the drummer insisted. "I just need you to stop harass me to no end. Give it a rest, Ryochan… please. Please."
“Oh, you don’t have to worry about that," Ryo told him. “I already promised I’d stop.”
Ohkura raised an eyebrow.
“I don’t even remember such a thing happening, and believe me, I think I would. Were you drunk, Ryochan?”
“You’re not funny, you know...” Ryo whined, scratching his head. But the truth was, that after the stolen kiss incident, he felt all but ready to confess the other what had really happened that night. And for what purpose, even?
In Sapporo, Ryo had secretly told himself that he’d have stopped acting stupidly for him.
It did hurt, having feelings, but it did hurt also feeling like a fool. And it did hurt even more being rejected one day after another, continuously, not to mention seeing Ohkura acting so defensively from him. Maybe that was what hurt him the most.
And maybe he was too tired to fight all by himself a useless war.
"Alright,” he sighed. “You win, Ohkura. I'll stop being a pain in the ass, starting now and forever, okay?"
He looked up at the drummer, who slowly nodded in confirmation.
His lips parted to pronounce a silent thanks of appreciation, and Ryo couldn't help but feel his cheeks going slightly pink during such a sad moment. A moment he thinks he’ll hardly forget.
**
So, about the true facts here, we've got Ohkura fumbling over Roller Coaster at acoustic sessions ;)
Chapter 6 - Monologue