Classic Everything But Imaginary: The Trouble With X-Ray Vision
Why no new TAI feature tonight, guys? Because after I got home from work, I sat down at my computer and -- instead of writing -- spent four freaking hours trying to get my iPod to work. Ever since the iTunes 7.0 upgrade came out, my iPod Shuffle hasn't worked for beans. I've got to restore the system virtually every time I plug it in, and then there are nights like tonight, where if I have the gall to try to load a second audio track onto the device the whole damn system freezes up. Yeah. I'm frustrated.
But anyway, how about a Classic Everything But Imaginary to quell the rage? This one is from August 20, 2003, and it's oddly prescient -- it's a discussion about how heroes should really behave.
THE TROUBLE WITH X-RAY VISION
So Marvel is expanding its MAX line of mature reader titles again, and this time out they’re apparently going to include a new version of Ant-Man. Makes sense to me. Of all the characters that have screamed for the “mature readers” treatment over the years, Ant-Man was always at the top of my list.
When asked about the series editor John Miesegaes reportedly said, “What would you do if you were two inches tall? You could do anything like hang out in supermodels’ panties.” Oddly, this quote expresses perfectly why I’m not entirely confident in some of the changes in the works for Superman.
Allow me to explain.
A few weeks ago everybody was buzzing about the announcement of the new writers and artists that will come on-board the Superman books next year, and while I like several of the choices, one of the writers did an interview where he started explaining that Superman should just be an average guy like anybody else, but one who happened to have super powers. This sent a chill of terror up my spine, because try as I might, I can’t think of a worse direction to take this character, this icon into. Superman isn’t a regular guy. Superman can’t be a regular guy, because the minute he is, you can’t believe he’s Superman anymore.
Think about that Ant-Man quote again. When I heard they were doing a MAX Ant-Man, before I even heard the editor’s explanation, my immediate reaction was, “What’s the book going to be about, shrinking down and sneaking into women’s shower rooms or something?
Because, let’s face it, no matter how cultured or evolved we’d like to believe we are, that’s the first thing most of us “regular guys” would think of doing if we suddenly had powers. I refuse to believe there’s anyone reading this column that hasn’t, at some point in their lives, thought about the less-than-noble potential in the abilities of our favorite comic book characters. And I really refuse to believe that most of us could resist the temptation all the time.
We’ve all had thoughts about tossing a bit of X-Ray vision at a cute girl on the street. We walk out of our offices after a bad day and imagine turning the tires on our boss’ car into a pool of melted rubber with a glance. We get mad at a snooty waiter and want to conjure up a gust of arctic breath to blow his stupid toupee off and freeze it to the wall. I do believe that the majority of us would do some good with our powers, if we had them, but I believe we’d abuse them from time to time as well. I know I would.
Superman doesn’t, though. He has to be above that. That isn’t to say he has to be an utterly inhuman character. I know he’s got the reputation as the stiff, as the boy scout, and that’s unfair. There’s no reason he can’t be charming and funny and somebody you want to hang around and read about. And he’ll feel temptation too, just like any ordinary man. But unlike an ordinary man, Superman can’t allow himself the luxury to give in to it, because he has learned what his power means. Alex Ross and Paul Dini’s Superman: Peace on Earth graphic novel from a few years back had a quote so good, so perfectly encapsulating this character, that I’ve never forgotten it.
“I look upon my powers as a gift,” Superman said. “Not mine alone, but for anyone who needs them.”
What “average guy” is strong enough to see it that way?
I think the Smallville TV show is a great series, but it is also very challenging in terms of characterization. John Schneider and Annette O’Toole, as Jonathan and Martha Kent, have the toughest jobs any actors have ever had translating this comic book to film. Clark is still young in this series, you understand. He’s allowed to falter. He’s allowed to make mistakes. Jonathan and Martha, however, have to be characters that we can believe would raise a child with great power that can resist the urge to use it for his own gains. That’s a remarkable thing.
This is one of the reasons I’ve been so impressed by the first two issues of Mark Waid and Leinil Yu’s Superman: Birthright. This is a Clark a bit older than the one we see in Smallville, a bit younger than the one we saw in John Byrne’s Man of Steel. He’s someone still walking down the path that will make him Earth’s greatest hero. A lot of people have argued about whether the series is in-continuity or not. If it’s this good, does it have to be? Call it Ultimate Superman, if you want. I see it as something different. It reads very much as a bridge between the two popular incarnations of this character as he exists right now -- the one that shows up on the WB network every Wednesday night and the one that shows up in your friendly neighborhood comic shop every Wednesday afternoon. Indeed, in issue two Clark even asks his parents if they’ve heard from “Lex,” a cryptic comment that you could imagine Tom Welling’s Clark asking six or seven years down the road, but that would be inappropriate for Byrne’s. It doesn’t matter. It works.
It works because this is a Clark who is human but who understands, due to the accident of his birth, he has to make himself slightly better than human. It’s a Clark we can picture harvesting wheat for his father or wasting quarters at an arcade, one that could agonize over Lana and Chloe and someday hand over a Kryptonite ring to Batman for safekeeping.
I really, really wish we could land ads for Birthright during Smallville each and every week, or at least once the collected edition comes out, because this is a title that fans of that show could get into, and then follow into the habit of reading comic books, which ultimately, is what it’s all about.
But it’ll sure help things if, once they get to the other side of the bridge, the Superman they find there fits with the one that lured them in.
FAVORITE OF THE WEEK: August 13, 2003
It’s incredible that in a week with JSA, 1602 and Fables, the book that got to me the most was Fantastic Four #502, the second part of the eight-issue “Reasons it Was Stupid to Axe Mark Waid” story arc. Okay, not really. It was part two of “The Fifth Wheel,” which itself was a coda to “Unthinkable.” The team is still reeling from the actions of Doctor Doom, and the way they handled things in this issue really spoke out to me. Johnny takes Reed on a trip for a little tough love, while Sue and Ben try to help Franklin deal with his ordeal in Hell.
What really stands out here is how these characters are shown in roles that aren’t typical for them. Uber-Parents Reed and Sue find themselves helpless, while Johnny displays real cleverness and understanding and Ben shows extraordinary compassion. This was a really touching issue, and just furthered my personal belief that the Thing is the gutsiest character in all of comicdom.
Blake M. Petit is the author of a novel, Other People’s Heroes. He hasn’t missed an issue of a monthly Superman title for 13 years, even during the Red/Blue fiasco. He hopes he doesn’t have to start now. E-mail him at Blakept@cox.net.
But anyway, how about a Classic Everything But Imaginary to quell the rage? This one is from August 20, 2003, and it's oddly prescient -- it's a discussion about how heroes should really behave.
THE TROUBLE WITH X-RAY VISION
So Marvel is expanding its MAX line of mature reader titles again, and this time out they’re apparently going to include a new version of Ant-Man. Makes sense to me. Of all the characters that have screamed for the “mature readers” treatment over the years, Ant-Man was always at the top of my list.
When asked about the series editor John Miesegaes reportedly said, “What would you do if you were two inches tall? You could do anything like hang out in supermodels’ panties.” Oddly, this quote expresses perfectly why I’m not entirely confident in some of the changes in the works for Superman.
Allow me to explain.
A few weeks ago everybody was buzzing about the announcement of the new writers and artists that will come on-board the Superman books next year, and while I like several of the choices, one of the writers did an interview where he started explaining that Superman should just be an average guy like anybody else, but one who happened to have super powers. This sent a chill of terror up my spine, because try as I might, I can’t think of a worse direction to take this character, this icon into. Superman isn’t a regular guy. Superman can’t be a regular guy, because the minute he is, you can’t believe he’s Superman anymore.
Think about that Ant-Man quote again. When I heard they were doing a MAX Ant-Man, before I even heard the editor’s explanation, my immediate reaction was, “What’s the book going to be about, shrinking down and sneaking into women’s shower rooms or something?
Because, let’s face it, no matter how cultured or evolved we’d like to believe we are, that’s the first thing most of us “regular guys” would think of doing if we suddenly had powers. I refuse to believe there’s anyone reading this column that hasn’t, at some point in their lives, thought about the less-than-noble potential in the abilities of our favorite comic book characters. And I really refuse to believe that most of us could resist the temptation all the time.
We’ve all had thoughts about tossing a bit of X-Ray vision at a cute girl on the street. We walk out of our offices after a bad day and imagine turning the tires on our boss’ car into a pool of melted rubber with a glance. We get mad at a snooty waiter and want to conjure up a gust of arctic breath to blow his stupid toupee off and freeze it to the wall. I do believe that the majority of us would do some good with our powers, if we had them, but I believe we’d abuse them from time to time as well. I know I would.
Superman doesn’t, though. He has to be above that. That isn’t to say he has to be an utterly inhuman character. I know he’s got the reputation as the stiff, as the boy scout, and that’s unfair. There’s no reason he can’t be charming and funny and somebody you want to hang around and read about. And he’ll feel temptation too, just like any ordinary man. But unlike an ordinary man, Superman can’t allow himself the luxury to give in to it, because he has learned what his power means. Alex Ross and Paul Dini’s Superman: Peace on Earth graphic novel from a few years back had a quote so good, so perfectly encapsulating this character, that I’ve never forgotten it.
“I look upon my powers as a gift,” Superman said. “Not mine alone, but for anyone who needs them.”
What “average guy” is strong enough to see it that way?
I think the Smallville TV show is a great series, but it is also very challenging in terms of characterization. John Schneider and Annette O’Toole, as Jonathan and Martha Kent, have the toughest jobs any actors have ever had translating this comic book to film. Clark is still young in this series, you understand. He’s allowed to falter. He’s allowed to make mistakes. Jonathan and Martha, however, have to be characters that we can believe would raise a child with great power that can resist the urge to use it for his own gains. That’s a remarkable thing.
This is one of the reasons I’ve been so impressed by the first two issues of Mark Waid and Leinil Yu’s Superman: Birthright. This is a Clark a bit older than the one we see in Smallville, a bit younger than the one we saw in John Byrne’s Man of Steel. He’s someone still walking down the path that will make him Earth’s greatest hero. A lot of people have argued about whether the series is in-continuity or not. If it’s this good, does it have to be? Call it Ultimate Superman, if you want. I see it as something different. It reads very much as a bridge between the two popular incarnations of this character as he exists right now -- the one that shows up on the WB network every Wednesday night and the one that shows up in your friendly neighborhood comic shop every Wednesday afternoon. Indeed, in issue two Clark even asks his parents if they’ve heard from “Lex,” a cryptic comment that you could imagine Tom Welling’s Clark asking six or seven years down the road, but that would be inappropriate for Byrne’s. It doesn’t matter. It works.
It works because this is a Clark who is human but who understands, due to the accident of his birth, he has to make himself slightly better than human. It’s a Clark we can picture harvesting wheat for his father or wasting quarters at an arcade, one that could agonize over Lana and Chloe and someday hand over a Kryptonite ring to Batman for safekeeping.
I really, really wish we could land ads for Birthright during Smallville each and every week, or at least once the collected edition comes out, because this is a title that fans of that show could get into, and then follow into the habit of reading comic books, which ultimately, is what it’s all about.
But it’ll sure help things if, once they get to the other side of the bridge, the Superman they find there fits with the one that lured them in.
FAVORITE OF THE WEEK: August 13, 2003
It’s incredible that in a week with JSA, 1602 and Fables, the book that got to me the most was Fantastic Four #502, the second part of the eight-issue “Reasons it Was Stupid to Axe Mark Waid” story arc. Okay, not really. It was part two of “The Fifth Wheel,” which itself was a coda to “Unthinkable.” The team is still reeling from the actions of Doctor Doom, and the way they handled things in this issue really spoke out to me. Johnny takes Reed on a trip for a little tough love, while Sue and Ben try to help Franklin deal with his ordeal in Hell.
What really stands out here is how these characters are shown in roles that aren’t typical for them. Uber-Parents Reed and Sue find themselves helpless, while Johnny displays real cleverness and understanding and Ben shows extraordinary compassion. This was a really touching issue, and just furthered my personal belief that the Thing is the gutsiest character in all of comicdom.
Blake M. Petit is the author of a novel, Other People’s Heroes. He hasn’t missed an issue of a monthly Superman title for 13 years, even during the Red/Blue fiasco. He hopes he doesn’t have to start now. E-mail him at Blakept@cox.net.