In This World and the Next Intro and Chapter 1

[szaleniec1000]

We've seen some pretty terrible Rons in the almost two and a half years I've been doing these reviews. Dark Secrets gave us Ron the Death Eater in a very literal sense, who also abused Jaiden because he somehow thought that was the best way to keep her on his side. Betrayed Revenge gave us the previous Ron as a vengeful spirit given life by

Comments

[sickbritkid2]

We're not told why Ginny thinks it's so unreasonable that Harry should help one of his best friends find her memory-wiped parents. She's evil too, because she's a Weasley. This isn't an exaggeration: the summary of the fic even says "not for Weasley fans".

They're gingers, mate.

And, as we all know, GINGERS HAVE NO SOUL!!

[szaleniec1000]

I wouldn't be surprised if this actually turned out to be the author's reasoning, considering how often his characters (and these versions of Harry and Hermione are indeed his characters as they bear no resemblance to JKR's) describe them with terms such as "the red menace".

[sickbritkid2]

"The Red Menace?"

...seriously!?

[szaleniec1000]

"Yes well I figured out that the whole introduction to the red menace was planned on some level, when I didn't take the bait mother Molly grabbed my arm and started dragging me away. I screamed blue murder that I was being abducted and the last I saw of them they were being handcuffed by the police! All except Ron that is, I heard the first aider say I might have broken his jaw, not a bad beginning but things will get much worse for them if I have anything to do with it."

Note at this point that none of the Weasleys have actually done anything to Harry yet, on account of the whole "travelling back in time" thing. This fic is wrong on so many levels.

[sickbritkid2]

On a purely pedantic note, jumbo jets do not cruise at fifty thousand feet, but typically between thirty and forty thousand (depending on load and weather conditions) with a service ceiling of 41,000.

And not to mention: Couldn't they have just fuckin', I dunno, APPARATED to Australia!? Or, hell, maybe they could have gotten a secure location from Shacklebolt or some other dolt at the Ministry and taken the Floo Network!

[szaleniec1000]

It's a long way to Apparate and it's canon that it's hard to Apparate that far, but on the other hand this version of Harry is a Gary Stu.

[sickbritkid2]

Okay, but still, there's the Floo Network, magic carpets...

Hell, there are even broomsticks!

Is this author trying to tell me that the wizards never developed their own means of transcontinental transportation!?

[sickbritkid2]

This part of the story is presented in summary, even though it would be legitimately interesting to read about Hermione's search for and reunion with her parents in Australia.

Plus, wouldn't Hermione have had something of a general idea where they were in Australia, considering that she was the one who SENT them there!?

We shift from a summary of several days to a scene narrative with so little grace that you can almost hear the screech of brakes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IgMAMI_eD6c

[szaleniec1000]

At the very least she'd probably be able to track them by magic. But Hermione seems utterly incapable of any kind of magic in this fic. If she can't find them by magic and didn't give them a general idea where to go... well, they found them rather quickly considering that Australia isn't exactly a small country.

[sickbritkid2]

To be fair, most of Australia's population centers are coastal cities. Still, you'd think she would have instructed them to go live in, say, Sydney or Brisbane or Melbourne so that way she wouldn't have to go digging through every major Australian city to find them provided she survived the war.

[sickbritkid2]

Both Harry and Hermione were aware the magical world was corrupt but this had reached new lows, from what they could gather Kingsley was denied being minister when some archaic law was wheeled out stating that the holder had to be British and a pureblood, since he was neither Doloris Umbridge somehow weaselled her way into the job. The Malfoy's had not only escaped a stay in Azkaban but were back in the society pages as pillars of the community. The biggest shock though was the Weasleys, Ron and Molly were being hailed as the Heroes of Hogwarts for their part in defeating the forces of the evil half-blood who'd deceived the country' pureblood elite. Harry and Hermione had fought and won the bloody war for the Weasleys to claim the credit with the bigotry issue appearing worse than ever.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EOOUSRacNFw&t=0m07shttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=

[sickbritkid2]

Ron is a "shit wizard" (can't you just hear Harry's voice in this narration?) who can't even put a Body-Bind on two Muggles, but is somehow able to overpower Hermione.

Little did Ron know, but Harry and Hermione's sabbatical to Australia also included an extended layover in America!