fanfic: Baby, don’t you break my heart slow. (5/?)
Title: Baby, don’t you break my heart slow. (5/?)
Author: sydneygirl1903
Rating: G
Pairing: Callie/Mark interaction, but it's all about Callie/Arizona
Summary: (song by Vonda Shepard) you’re a long way from somewhere you call home
there's a place in your heart, you're not alone. All of the happiness you seek, all of the joy for which you pray, is closer than you think, it's just 100 tears away.
Disclaimer: All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. I write for enjoyment only and I make no profit with this writing.
Author’s Note: Again, life keeping me busy, I wish I could write more than only on the weekends, but hey, you gotta earn some money, right? :) And thank you so much for all the nice comments so far! They make my day!
“I cannot have another stupid romantic disaster in this hospital, Mark.” Callie was babbling. The bottle of Tequila had been emptied quite a while ago and they were now drinking the Whisky Mark brought. Mark couldn’t help but smile at drunken Callie. Drunken Callie was always fun to watch, even under those circumstances. He had known Callie for some time now and it pained him to see her struggling like that. He had seen that whole George and Izzie disaster happening and knew how long it had taken Callie to walk tall again. Then, when it finally seemed like she was getting back on track she discovered her very confusing feelings for Erica. He also had helped her to get through those, only to see his best friend broken and left in pieces for a second time. Followed by that Arizona had appeared on the scene, well, at Seattle Grace. And once again his best friend’s life took a dramatic turn when Callie came out to her father and he disowned her. Arizona had helped her through that and stood by her side, she never complained about the fact that Callie sometimes was still talking about Erica, and when George died she was the one that helped Callie to get through this.
When Erica had returned to Seattle about six months ago he had warned Callie to be careful. But she wouldn’t listen and now she was in serious trouble that he knew. But he didn’t know what exactly was going on. So what else could he do than just ask her.
“Cal, tell me, what happened? You haven’t talked to me in ages. I have no idea what has been going on between you and Erica. Did you…”
“Did I sleep with her? No Mark, I didn’t. But to be honest, I don’t really know what happened. When she first called and asked if we could get together for a drink I said no. I told her that I am with someone else now whom I love very much and that I am happy and her call comes two years late. But she said this wasn’t about winning me back and that she just wanted to talk. And you know I just wanted some answers. I wanted to know why she had left me. When we met it was awkward at first, but after a while it was like she had never left. We had as much fun as we had before we got together. I had my best friend back, Mark. We met for a drink more often and before I knew it Arizona and I were drifting apart. I saw it happening, however I couldn’t stop it. I knew it was wrong, I felt it with every inch of my body, but I couldn’t help it. I was too weak and I hated myself for being that weak, I was angry with myself for treating Arizona like that; I know she didn’t deserve it. I noticed that she suspected something to be wrong and she asked me about it so many times, I became aware of how much I was hurting her with my behaviour and how much she tried to fix things that weren’t hers to fix, that weren’t her fault. As much as I was scared that she would find out, I am relieved she knows now. At least the lying will come to an end now, well I hope though. If only I would know how to figure things out. And I still can’t believe she actually read my SMS!”
Mark had listened to Callie without interrupting her once. He knew her well enough to let her get it all off her chest. But he also knew she loved Arizona with all her heart, but given her relationship past she had the habit of making it harder than it actually was and to create problems that hadn’t been there before.
“Cal, do you remember how you felt when that George and Izzie disaster happened? When you sensed something was wrong but didn’t know what it was? Do you bear in mind those feelings? I mean, no, she shouldn’t have read your SMS. However, I think, that you of all people should be able to understand how she felt and what made her take that radical step.Don’t you think?!”
Callie was staring at Mark, his words slowly sinking in, slowly making their way through her brain till they would get to the right place. It took them a while to get there. Too much alcohol was preventing them from reaching their destination any faster. But then, “Wham”, they just hit the right spot.
“Holy Crap! Mark!!!” Callie exclaimed so sudden that it made Mark almost jump out of his skin. “Erica almost became my Izzie, didn’t she? I mean, not that I am married to Arizona, but…oh my god!” Realization flooded through Callie’s alcohol soaked body, her eyes widened in shock.
Mark let out a sigh of relieve. Not that anything was solved yet, but at least Callie seemed to be seeing a bit clearer now. Well, her vision was probably still very much blurry, because of all the alcohol consumed, but she was on the right track now.
Callie was by now resting her head on her arms, shaking it in disbelief permanently. “I am a horrible, horrible person.” She sighed.
“No, Callie, you are not a horrible person. Just a really stupid one.”
“Thank you, Mark, thanks a lot. How is it that you always seem to find the right words?” Callie managed to give him a weak smile. She knew he was right.
“That is…”, he said, giving her a huge, drunken smile, “because remember? I am good for more than sex!” They were both laughing now. “Listen Cal, this is how I see it: Figure out what you want, give yourself a couple of days, or even weeks to do that, if you need to. But honestly, I think everything you have been looking for, everything you wanted since George cheated on you and Erica left you, all the happiness you seek and all the joy you want is way closer than you think it is. It’s all right there in front of you with Arizona. And I really don’t understand why you can’t see it or why you keep pushing it away. The most important thing is: talk to her! Move your drunken ass and talk to her. Ok, no, I take that back, wait and take your sober ass to wherever she is now and talk, explain to her your feelings and don’t forget to apologize and to point out what an idiot you have been. And then, hope she’ll forgive you eventually and take you back.”
“Mark, you know what? And this might come as much as a shck to you as it came to me, I think you might be right.”
“You think? And I might? You wanna try that one again?”
“Ok ok, I know you are right! There! Better? Jesus Mark, sometimes you can be a pain in the ass, you know that don’t you? I hate you for that!””
“Nah, Torres, you love me and you know it!”
“No, well, yes, I do love you, really Mark, and I think you are more than right. For once in my life I had someone who needed me and I needed her, and I still do. And what did I do?! I drove her away. The only person who has ever been there for me with all her heart, with all she had to give. How could I have been so incredibly stupid, Mark? ... NO, don’t you dare to answer! … With her I finally didn’t feel alone anymore and I always thought as long as I had her I could make it, could handle anything … Uh, that is good. Maybe I should write this down … Mark, I am going to win her back. I swear.” Hope appeared in Callie’s eyes. Mark could see she was already making plans in her head to win Arizona back. But the, all of a sudden that glimmer of hope disappeared from her eyes again, making room for another strong feeling, but one that wasn’t welcomed very much. He saw fear in his friend’s eyes.
“What if she doens t want me back?” Callie asked with a shaken and trembling voice. “What if it is too late What if I have already ruined things for us? What if she won’t have me back?”
“Oh then” Mark replied once again with a mischievous grin on his face “I’ll just have beat some sense into her. That was my second option for you as well by the way. You know, just in case you wouldn’t have seen it yourself.” He said, still smiling like he had slept with a coat hanger in his mouth.
He gave her another encouraging, heart warming smile, putting his arm around her shoulder and pulling her closer into a comforting hug. “I know you will win her back, and I know she’ll take you back, because you two are perfect for each other, and if she doesn’t know that already, she’s an idiot, and I’ll do anything to help you win her back.”
“Mark?” Callie lifted her hear head, looking at him. “I am glad you are good for more than sex.” It felt good to have a friend like Mark by her side, someone to lean on and someone who was not afraid of telling her the truth when she had screwed up like she had done this time. Now that she had figured out what she wanted to do all she could hope for was that Arizona would be willing to give her another chance. She was desperately hoping Arizona would talk to her. Or at least listen to what she had to say.