Penelo Supports Sobriety (for Vaan) [Cast]
Canon Status: in-game, Rabanastre
Genre: General, Humour.
Rating: PG.
Characters: Cast (Vaan, Penelo, Balthier, Ashe, Fran, Basch).
Pairing: None.
Warnings: Alcohol. Whee!
Notes: Scenes from a Salvation series. Inspired by a rant about Drunk!Abusive!Vaan.
Summary: Vaan is never, ever allowed to get drunk. Ever.
In Vaan's studied opinion, there was no point in going on an adventure if you had to bring along your own personal surrogate-mother cunningly disguised as a best friend.
Penelo swiped Vaan's drink and deftly switched it with Balthier's empty tankard. "Haven't you learned better by now, Vaan?"
"Hrrumph," Vaan said eloquently. He'd thought he was being subtle, ordering his drink while Penelo had been checking the notice board for new marks.
"Why, exactly, are you so determined to prevent the boy having a single drink?" asked Balthier. "Unless I'm much mistaken, this is the third bar running where he hasn't had even a drop. Not that I mind particularly," he added, taking a sip from the full tankard now before him. "Only, if you're taking this roundabout way of buying me a drink, I would have to tell you--"
"Don't be silly," Penelo interrupted.
Balthier faked an injured expression. "Am I so repulsive? And here I thought I was something of a desirable property!"
Penelo was not affected by either look or words. "If I wanted to buy you a drink (which I don't), I would. I just don't want Vaan to have one, and you can handle the extra alcohol."
"Dare I ask why it's so important to you that Vaan remain sober?"
Penelo grinned. Vaan whimpered internally (well, mostly internally; Fran gave him a very strange look). "You've never seen him drunk, have you?"
"I must admit I have yet to have the pleasure. And whose fault is that if not your own?"
"Well, you just have to take a good look at Vaan to know he's a total lightweight, right?" Balthier nodded. So did Ashe. Vaan kind of felt like committing treason. "And he is--gets completely sloshed on half a pint and can't tell he shouldn't have another. The first and last time I ever saw him drink, well…" Vaan could tell that even Basch was listening. He wanted to die. "…let's just say he dances on tables like a professional."
There was a long moment of silence, in which Vaan cursed the floor for its utter failure to open up and swallow him. Then Ashe, of all people, started laughing, muffling her giggles in her hand. Penelo and Balthier joined in, her laughter underscored by his deeper chuckling. Basch did not laugh, Vaan convinced himself. That muffled snort was a sneeze. It was! Even the corners of Fran's mouth twitched upward.
If he buried his head in his arms, they couldn’t see that he was blushing. "I hate you, Penelo," Vaan told the bar top.
Genre: General, Humour.
Rating: PG.
Characters: Cast (Vaan, Penelo, Balthier, Ashe, Fran, Basch).
Pairing: None.
Warnings: Alcohol. Whee!
Notes: Scenes from a Salvation series. Inspired by a rant about Drunk!Abusive!Vaan.
Summary: Vaan is never, ever allowed to get drunk. Ever.
In Vaan's studied opinion, there was no point in going on an adventure if you had to bring along your own personal surrogate-mother cunningly disguised as a best friend.
Penelo swiped Vaan's drink and deftly switched it with Balthier's empty tankard. "Haven't you learned better by now, Vaan?"
"Hrrumph," Vaan said eloquently. He'd thought he was being subtle, ordering his drink while Penelo had been checking the notice board for new marks.
"Why, exactly, are you so determined to prevent the boy having a single drink?" asked Balthier. "Unless I'm much mistaken, this is the third bar running where he hasn't had even a drop. Not that I mind particularly," he added, taking a sip from the full tankard now before him. "Only, if you're taking this roundabout way of buying me a drink, I would have to tell you--"
"Don't be silly," Penelo interrupted.
Balthier faked an injured expression. "Am I so repulsive? And here I thought I was something of a desirable property!"
Penelo was not affected by either look or words. "If I wanted to buy you a drink (which I don't), I would. I just don't want Vaan to have one, and you can handle the extra alcohol."
"Dare I ask why it's so important to you that Vaan remain sober?"
Penelo grinned. Vaan whimpered internally (well, mostly internally; Fran gave him a very strange look). "You've never seen him drunk, have you?"
"I must admit I have yet to have the pleasure. And whose fault is that if not your own?"
"Well, you just have to take a good look at Vaan to know he's a total lightweight, right?" Balthier nodded. So did Ashe. Vaan kind of felt like committing treason. "And he is--gets completely sloshed on half a pint and can't tell he shouldn't have another. The first and last time I ever saw him drink, well…" Vaan could tell that even Basch was listening. He wanted to die. "…let's just say he dances on tables like a professional."
There was a long moment of silence, in which Vaan cursed the floor for its utter failure to open up and swallow him. Then Ashe, of all people, started laughing, muffling her giggles in her hand. Penelo and Balthier joined in, her laughter underscored by his deeper chuckling. Basch did not laugh, Vaan convinced himself. That muffled snort was a sneeze. It was! Even the corners of Fran's mouth twitched upward.
If he buried his head in his arms, they couldn’t see that he was blushing. "I hate you, Penelo," Vaan told the bar top.