A mixed bag

[suelet]

The holidays were....interesting

Comments

[much_ado]

Since starting grad school and having to learn how to live much more simply, one of the constant surprises has been how little I've missed things that once used to be "important"... or at least took up a LOT of my time. And I think there's a confluence of ideas there that's worth picking apart: just because we allow something to usurp so much time, doesn't necessarily mean it *is* important, or that it remains important over the longer term. Whether it's a relationship, a job, or a hobby, sometimes it's a whole lot easier to let go of and *NOT* miss than we think it will be, because we've only been going through the motions and not really engaging like we once might have. And yes, it's sad because it *WAS* such a big thing for so long, but you know what? The things that are good about it remain good, and you can cherry-pick among those as time, energy, finances allow. The things that were maybe less-good but were taking up all of your time just because of inertia? No, you're not going to miss any of that. And that's okay

[suelet]

I don't know how to feel about it really. I love doing medieval stuff, and researching medieval stuff. The SCA is my excuse to do so. And I believe in supporting my communities...because it doesn't just happen without that.
But what I have to bring to the table isn't really wanted, and figuring out something new just doesn't seem like it's worth the effort. I don't know if that's being lazy or pouting (which no doubt would be some interpretations) or just making my life about my own priorities.

I miss the people, but the people who miss *me* make the effort outside of the hobby.

[much_ado]

Priorities can and do shift over time, so regardless of how other people interpret the absence, if your focus in the SCA is muddied or unclear for the nonce, it's okay that priorities with clarity get more focus. when something in the SCA becomes important enough to bring clarity, then re-evaluate. Self-care and needing to manage real-life stressors is an excellent reason for SCA involvement to drop off; ghods know, it's been my reasoning for years now.