For muse_shuffle | April Disc Two
19. They hold my hand and ask me to pull through
A voice I know says dear, he probably can’t hear you...
[‘Air’ - Ben Folds Five]
Co-written with mrpublicity | Follows THIS
Aiden's eyeballs felt like they were hanging out of his head by the time he stepped off the elevator in the ICU at Mount Sinai. He hated this place. It reminded him too much of when Pat was in hospital after the Mexico trip, but it wouldn't be enough to keep him away. He had been stunned when Alex approached him at the party following the christening. He had recognised the face, but couldn't place it at first. It was only after Alex pulled him aside and filled him in on the whole story that Aiden started to follow what was happening... and he was stunned. It had been like his brain exploded then, trying to explain what had happened to Pat, and further explain he needed to go back to Princeton on some Men In Black spaceship and hopefully Alex didn't zap his memories en route. It had been a long flight, and Aiden was still reeling, but he just tried to focus on getting to Harri to keep him sane. He couldn't even begin to try and figure out what the fuck it all meant. He would need more info to attempt that.
He found James' room easy... and it was strange trying to think of the bastard as 'James'. It would take some getting used to. "Harri," he said breathlessly, skidding a little in the doorway from running too fast and nearly missing it. He grabbed the edge of the door to right himself, feeling like his heart was going to pound out of his chest.
Harri was still trying to work out if it was ironic that one of the nurses had given her a copy of Razor to pass the time. Being left with an issue of her own magazine was... well, it was hardly a distraction she welcomed. Her hand clasped James' tightly, and she watched him quietly, bare feet tucked under her. She hadn't put on any shoes in her rush to go in the ambulance. Her work clothes were very crinkled now after first sitting with James on the tiles, and then sitting by his bedside for hours. She'd taken little breaks here, and there, but she refused for the most part to leave his side. She hadn't even realised Ali was waiting outside until she'd walked past to get some tea. On her way back she'd asked the woman to join her, then Izzy had come. That had been awkward, and all three women had passed the time in silence.
Then Ali had left to spend some time with Andy and Jamie, and Harri had been left with Izzy. At first the two had said nothing, and then they'd started talking about Marc and James. Harri had been wanting to know if she'd known James, or Marc. It turned out she'd known both. Iz had quizzed her about Marc, and Harri could tell she hadn't liked everything she'd heard. Now she was alone again after Izzy had some message from her boss.
At the sound of Aiden's voice, Harri looked up slowly, her blue eyes lacking any of their usual life. She took one look at her best friend and burst into tears before she struggled out of her chair and quickly walked up to him, and threw her arms around Aiden. Truth was, no one had told her anything. All these people that kept coming in and out of James' room said nothing. Harri knew that it was significant that he was now James, and not Marc, but she didn't understand why. "Aiden," she choked out.
Aiden hugged her back securely, catching a disbelieving sight of James over her shoulder as he did. It was worse than surreal. He had been sure on the whole trip over that this Alex was taking him for a ride and he would show up to New York needing to hand over ransome for some hostage situation Marcus Fraser had gotten Harri into. That had to be it. The coma thing seemed to painful, but clearly the complete truth. "It's okay," he murmured against her ear. "It'll be okay." Not that he actually believed his own words, but he could at least try to make sure Harri was okay. Even if, according to what Alex had said, she had probably likely been sitting here waiting for close to two days now. Alex had done a fourteen hour round trip to get to Edinburgh to explain to Aiden and then accompany him on the SS jet back to NYC. Pat seemed to get what Alex was saying better than Aiden did and Aiden realised then he was probably missing vital portions of information. Not because he had chosen not to tell him, but more that there really hadn't been time to tell him. With Cameron's accident and Pat trying to get things back on track with his twin, and the drive up to Edinburgh for the christening where Pat and Riley officially became RJ's godfathers, it was just difficult to actually find a time for them to meet minds on the whole situation.
But if what Alex had been saying was the truth, Marc... James... was seriously ill and that meant Harri needed Aiden. No matter what was going to fill all the gaps, Aiden just knew he had to go to New York, and Pat agreed. Aiden apologised to Tara and Lachlan, explaining there was a family emergency in New York he had to get back for ASAP, and then left, leaving Pat in Britain with his family. "Please tell me I haven't stumbled into some fourth dimension and I'm now a cyborg with no brain, because I'm really not sure anymore. I still have my cock, which is a plus, but it may or may not be attached with a microchip now."
Harri managed a huff of breath in place of a laugh as she continued to cling to Aiden. She couldn't remember what it was like to get more than a couple of hours sleep, and her brain was slow. She'd only managed to eat small bites of a sandwich the day before, her stomach not able to cope with the idea of anything more. "There's no fourth dimension, but then maybe I'm the one imagining you. I never even got to call you... I thought you'd be busy in England. I didn't want to bother you. How did you even know?"
"No, fuck. You aren't imagining me. I really did just travel seven hours on the Millenium Falcon to get here in a rush." Aiden stepped back a little, exhaliing heavily. "Some dude called Alex showed up to the christening party all James Bond Men in Black shit. I recognised him. He was the bloke at the hospital in Liverpool, only not blond and without glasses. He started talking at me about all this shit, so I knew it was bloody Fraser. And it was, only I never expected him to tell me all that crap, you know? Anyway, something about Marc turning back into this James Campbell person because he needs to return to the FBI as some liaison for his case, which means he has to be Secret Service, only as himself so he can go back to his old job and be in the right place to infiltrate Zimbabwe at sunset to sacrifice a slaughtered goat with fairy dust." He stopped, looking stressed and bewildered, holding his hands up. "Do I still have my hair? Did he turn me into a Yoda clone on the flight?"
Harri shook her head as she rubbed his head, fingers knotting in his short hair. "You're not a Yoda clone. And he told you more than me. He just squeezed my shoulder, and walked out... He's Marc's--James'--partner. I didn't even know all that FBI bullshit." Harri dropped her hand and took Aiden's in hers as she pulled him towards the chairs so they could both sit down. "I'm sorry you had to go through all that, but truth be told I'm selfish enough to be glad you're here. I can't do this without you, love. I'm going out of my mind. I don't know if he's going to wake up. No one does."
Aiden sat down and stared blankly at James for a few moments. "If it helps, I know how this whole..." he waved hand in James' direction, "I know how it feels. I do. And it's fucked. Nothing anyone says will really make you feel better and that sick cold grip in your gut? Doesn't go away until they wake up and tell you themselves they're okay..."
He sighed and turned back to Harri, scratching his fingers through his hair to try and fix the sticking up bits, though it was an absentminded action as he studied Harri's face. He reached for her hand. "Have you eaten? Slept? Changed? I just... I'm not sure how much I can help with the details. I was zoning out through most of it. I just have a feeling you maybe weren't told for your own protection. He did this to himself. Did you know that? He made himself sick because there needed to be some way for him to come back from the dead or something." He shook his head. "It's too fucked up. I don't get it. But I guess at the end of the day, it can't be a bad thing right? He'll be himself and no lies. At least, not where it counts."
Harri's eyes went wide as she looked from Aiden to James. "No, I didn't know that," she said in a hoarse voice. Her hand shook as she pushed her fingers through her tangled locks. "And I tried to eat yesterday. I haven't changed. I haven't been back to the apartment to get any clothes... And I slept for two hours last night. And two hours the night before. I just feel too sick... that sick cold grip in my gut isn't letting me do much of anything."
Aiden nodded. He really understood, even if he hadn't been pregnant when Pat was sick. "I hate hospitals," he mumured quietly, not for any particular reason. "I won't push you. If you need anything, you just tell me and you'll have it. I just don't want to stress you out. I'm getting good at the secondary vigil thing. To think, the biggest thing I used to worry about was my tie matching my shirt. You know, the guy hasn't given me much to like about him up until now, but all of a sudden, I just think... I think he did this for you and the kid. Probably on the face of it he had a lot of reasons to go this way and do it how he did, which he didn't do it alone. I got the feeling this Alex dude was in on the whole thing. But I think right deep down, the decision came for some reason. A reason important enough to risk his life to get it."
Harri wiped away her tears and sniffed as she looked at Aiden. "I need you to go to the apartment and get me his Rugby jersey. Please... I want to wear that, not this fucking stupid suit. And I just need you here. I don't really... I don't know what I need. Besides him awake. If he did this for us, then he needs to wake up so I can smack him for scaring the shit out of me. I can still see him lying there in a pool of his vomit. He could have fucking choked!"
Aiden put his arm around and pulled her against him, kissing her head. "I don't buy that you finding him like that when you didn't was an accident, love. Alex said he knew you were coming. I feel like I should still want to tear the guy's balls off for pulling that stunt with Cameron, but at the same time, it's like looking at an entirely different person. And maybe he is. See, in my head, when you actually met a guy you started dating and falling for, he was like a rich lawyer with a trendy haircut and a goldfish who liked red wine and dabbled in the stock market."
Harri gripped at Aiden's clothing and let herself relax into his embrace. God, she'd needed him so much... If she ever saw Alex again she'd thank him. After tearing his balls off for lying to her. "I'd kill him if I didn't love him so fucking much. Bastard. And also, your head clearly forgot how much I hate lawyers."
Aiden waved his hand lightly. "That's irrelevant. He was still relatively normal and maybe even scratched his balls in private to not offend you. I'm just saying... all this, it's giving me a migraine. But it's okay. I guess we'll just deal with it. I mean, the whole hospital gown thing really doesn't suit him. We can't be too harsh on him. He's a fashion road smash and don't even get me started on the decor of this place. There is no Feng Shui whatsoever." He glanced at her with a small smirk. "Hypothetically... or not. What's going through your mind right now?"
"I want him out of that gown, and back home. I want him to be okay. I want us to be okay... I don't want him to wake up and realise he's made a mistake," she murmured. "I love him, Aiden. And I really hate this fucking suit right now... I don't know why. I just hate it."
Aiden tucked his arm around his stomach, but then shifted in his seat again, absentmindedly curling his wedding ring around his finger. "What if he's a different person now? What if it turns out you don't love this James Campbell? It could happen. I'm not saying it will, but if he's so different to his undercover persona, I guess there is a possibility. Or how are you going to take it now he doesn't have all the secrets and is actually part of this whole other... established life? With friends and family and old work colleagues?"
"Funny you should mention that," Harri replied with a wry smile. "I was talking to his partner... ex-wife. Whatever she is. Best friend... Apparently I knew more of James Campbell than I thought. I don't think it's possible for me to not love him. I just have to be prepared for what comes next. I don't know what that is, though. Getting to know his family and friends, I guess. Getting used to the fact that he doesn't have to hide. That we don't have to hide."
"He must've been pretty messed up to get to this point, love," Aiden guessed. "Last few times I saw him, there was just something disconnected about him. When you first met him, he seemed to have this real bitchy mischievous streak, but then it was just gone. He must've really been missing his life and feeling normal. Maybe you can help him find that again. It's pretty nice, you know. The whole normal thing. Not at all overrated."
"Can I tell you something?" Harri asked, moving back to look up at him.
Aiden met her eyes again, his forehead creasing. "Yeah, of course," he said, even though he was a little worried what might come.
"I want normal," she admitted in a rush of air. "I know I said I could take all that SS crap, but I just want normal. Maybe the FBI will be slightly more normal. I just want to sit at home getting fat and pregnant and have him next to me."
Aiden looked at her, his blue eyes intent on her face. Probably at any other time he would have made some crack or teased her about the admission. But was just silent at first. He soon smiled a little and shook his head. "No, you don't. You just want to be able to have that some days when you feel like it. I know you. You could never totally give up being Harriet Ryan just like he obviously couldn't totally give up being James Campbell," he said quietly.
Her head fell back against Aiden's shoulder, and she sighed. "Yeah, you're right. Besides, Harriet Ryan still has the best clothes."
Aiden looked at her outfit with a snigger. "You reckon? And you call yourself a fag hag," he teased.
"You try keeping your suit smooth after sitting in a hospital chair for two days. I reliquish my fag hag title until he's awake so I can wear his jersey and be comfortable in peace."
"My suits are perfection," Aiden said with a light shrug. "I'm gay. I'm born pressed and color-coordinated. And hey, I can't knock the jersey. I saw my husband in one for the first time the other day and it took all my effort not to jump him."
Harri managed a grin. "Your husband... I'm still getting used to that, but it definitely becomes you."
Aiden's face lit up and he nodded. "I know. Some days, it still feels unreal. I really have no clue what I did to deserve it, but I must've been fucking fantastic," he said with a smirk.
Harri nuzzled against him, and tried to take comfort in his happiness. "I'm sorry you had to leave him to come here."
Aiden shook his head. "It's okay. I mean, yeah, I miss him. But he's patched things up with Cameron, so he's going to stick around in Britain until Cameron can come back here. He's going to be doing his rehab in Princeton. I think they need to spend some time together. It'll be good for them. It was just a relief the fight got resolved. I think Cameron's accident just brought a lot home to them both. It's probably going to be the same with you and Marcus James Fraser Campbell over here."
"I'm glad they worked it out. I'm glad Cameron's okay. I'm sure Izzy will be relieved as well..." Harri wiped at her eyes again, and sniffed. "How long have I got you for?"
"Until I pass out cold? It's, like," Aiden looked at his watch, "two am in Britain right now. I've been up since around four am so we could drive from Liverpool to Edinburgh to make the christening at eleven am. Special Agent Suit nabbed me from the party at five pm British time. The flight was seven hours and we got stuck in the morning rush hour traffic to get here to the hospital. Probably got another hour in me until I start talking in tongues, but if I can catch some sleep, I can hang around for as long as you need me. It doesn't look like Pat and Cameron will actually be coming home for another week or so, at the very least, so I'll just stick around here until they do. Then if he's still in a coma, you'll probably have both me and Pat haunting you after that. I'll make sure he doesn't jump up on the bed singing football songs to the whole ward."
"Why do I feel like there's a story there?" Harri asked with a slight smile. She squeezed Aiden's hand. "You should go sleep at our place. Then bring me back the jersey when you're ready for hospital duty. At least one of us should be getting sleep."
Aiden stifled a small yawn. "Alex told me he's not going to wake up any time soon. Especially not in the next forty eight hours. You go home and sleep for a bit. I'll wait here until you come back and then we can switch off. If you don't look after yourself, the kid's going to suffer, if it isn't already," he told her pointedly.
Harri's hand drifted to her belly and she looked like this was the first time she'd remembered she was pregnant. It wasn't something she forgot, but it was something that hadn't been at the forefront of her mind. "Bugger," she cursed quietly. She looked at James, then at Aiden, and sighed. "Okay, but you will call me if anything changes, won't you?"
Aiden nodded. "Yeah, of course. But it won't. Just try and take comfort in that. He's not going to wake up, so don't go home thinking he will and you won't be here. He injected himself with glucose, love. That's like the equivalent of a drug overdose. It's a substance his body can't process without his insulin, which he wasn't taking. Alex said he'll be out until his system filters it. So, just try and get some rest. Take a shower and try and eat something too. I'll be right here when you get back," he promised.
Harri nodded as she pulled herself out of her chair and first gave James a kiss on the forehead before she gave Aiden a brief hug and kissed his temple. "Thank you so much for coming, love. I don't know what I'd do without you."
"You won't need to find out. I'm sure one day, our positions will be reversed and I'll be needing you to send me home to sleep, too..." Aiden murmured and squeezed her hand. "Love you."
"Love you too, Aiden. And if that day ever comes, I will definitely be there. I promise." She kissed the top of his head before dragging herself away from James' hospital room. There was still a concern that he might wake up while she was gone, but she trusted Aiden to look after him. She also realised that she really did need to go home and take care of herself, and her unborn child.
Words: 3615 | All muses referred to with permission and come from the princeton2nyc verse
A voice I know says dear, he probably can’t hear you...
[‘Air’ - Ben Folds Five]
Co-written with mrpublicity | Follows THIS
Aiden's eyeballs felt like they were hanging out of his head by the time he stepped off the elevator in the ICU at Mount Sinai. He hated this place. It reminded him too much of when Pat was in hospital after the Mexico trip, but it wouldn't be enough to keep him away. He had been stunned when Alex approached him at the party following the christening. He had recognised the face, but couldn't place it at first. It was only after Alex pulled him aside and filled him in on the whole story that Aiden started to follow what was happening... and he was stunned. It had been like his brain exploded then, trying to explain what had happened to Pat, and further explain he needed to go back to Princeton on some Men In Black spaceship and hopefully Alex didn't zap his memories en route. It had been a long flight, and Aiden was still reeling, but he just tried to focus on getting to Harri to keep him sane. He couldn't even begin to try and figure out what the fuck it all meant. He would need more info to attempt that.
He found James' room easy... and it was strange trying to think of the bastard as 'James'. It would take some getting used to. "Harri," he said breathlessly, skidding a little in the doorway from running too fast and nearly missing it. He grabbed the edge of the door to right himself, feeling like his heart was going to pound out of his chest.
Harri was still trying to work out if it was ironic that one of the nurses had given her a copy of Razor to pass the time. Being left with an issue of her own magazine was... well, it was hardly a distraction she welcomed. Her hand clasped James' tightly, and she watched him quietly, bare feet tucked under her. She hadn't put on any shoes in her rush to go in the ambulance. Her work clothes were very crinkled now after first sitting with James on the tiles, and then sitting by his bedside for hours. She'd taken little breaks here, and there, but she refused for the most part to leave his side. She hadn't even realised Ali was waiting outside until she'd walked past to get some tea. On her way back she'd asked the woman to join her, then Izzy had come. That had been awkward, and all three women had passed the time in silence.
Then Ali had left to spend some time with Andy and Jamie, and Harri had been left with Izzy. At first the two had said nothing, and then they'd started talking about Marc and James. Harri had been wanting to know if she'd known James, or Marc. It turned out she'd known both. Iz had quizzed her about Marc, and Harri could tell she hadn't liked everything she'd heard. Now she was alone again after Izzy had some message from her boss.
At the sound of Aiden's voice, Harri looked up slowly, her blue eyes lacking any of their usual life. She took one look at her best friend and burst into tears before she struggled out of her chair and quickly walked up to him, and threw her arms around Aiden. Truth was, no one had told her anything. All these people that kept coming in and out of James' room said nothing. Harri knew that it was significant that he was now James, and not Marc, but she didn't understand why. "Aiden," she choked out.
Aiden hugged her back securely, catching a disbelieving sight of James over her shoulder as he did. It was worse than surreal. He had been sure on the whole trip over that this Alex was taking him for a ride and he would show up to New York needing to hand over ransome for some hostage situation Marcus Fraser had gotten Harri into. That had to be it. The coma thing seemed to painful, but clearly the complete truth. "It's okay," he murmured against her ear. "It'll be okay." Not that he actually believed his own words, but he could at least try to make sure Harri was okay. Even if, according to what Alex had said, she had probably likely been sitting here waiting for close to two days now. Alex had done a fourteen hour round trip to get to Edinburgh to explain to Aiden and then accompany him on the SS jet back to NYC. Pat seemed to get what Alex was saying better than Aiden did and Aiden realised then he was probably missing vital portions of information. Not because he had chosen not to tell him, but more that there really hadn't been time to tell him. With Cameron's accident and Pat trying to get things back on track with his twin, and the drive up to Edinburgh for the christening where Pat and Riley officially became RJ's godfathers, it was just difficult to actually find a time for them to meet minds on the whole situation.
But if what Alex had been saying was the truth, Marc... James... was seriously ill and that meant Harri needed Aiden. No matter what was going to fill all the gaps, Aiden just knew he had to go to New York, and Pat agreed. Aiden apologised to Tara and Lachlan, explaining there was a family emergency in New York he had to get back for ASAP, and then left, leaving Pat in Britain with his family. "Please tell me I haven't stumbled into some fourth dimension and I'm now a cyborg with no brain, because I'm really not sure anymore. I still have my cock, which is a plus, but it may or may not be attached with a microchip now."
Harri managed a huff of breath in place of a laugh as she continued to cling to Aiden. She couldn't remember what it was like to get more than a couple of hours sleep, and her brain was slow. She'd only managed to eat small bites of a sandwich the day before, her stomach not able to cope with the idea of anything more. "There's no fourth dimension, but then maybe I'm the one imagining you. I never even got to call you... I thought you'd be busy in England. I didn't want to bother you. How did you even know?"
"No, fuck. You aren't imagining me. I really did just travel seven hours on the Millenium Falcon to get here in a rush." Aiden stepped back a little, exhaliing heavily. "Some dude called Alex showed up to the christening party all James Bond Men in Black shit. I recognised him. He was the bloke at the hospital in Liverpool, only not blond and without glasses. He started talking at me about all this shit, so I knew it was bloody Fraser. And it was, only I never expected him to tell me all that crap, you know? Anyway, something about Marc turning back into this James Campbell person because he needs to return to the FBI as some liaison for his case, which means he has to be Secret Service, only as himself so he can go back to his old job and be in the right place to infiltrate Zimbabwe at sunset to sacrifice a slaughtered goat with fairy dust." He stopped, looking stressed and bewildered, holding his hands up. "Do I still have my hair? Did he turn me into a Yoda clone on the flight?"
Harri shook her head as she rubbed his head, fingers knotting in his short hair. "You're not a Yoda clone. And he told you more than me. He just squeezed my shoulder, and walked out... He's Marc's--James'--partner. I didn't even know all that FBI bullshit." Harri dropped her hand and took Aiden's in hers as she pulled him towards the chairs so they could both sit down. "I'm sorry you had to go through all that, but truth be told I'm selfish enough to be glad you're here. I can't do this without you, love. I'm going out of my mind. I don't know if he's going to wake up. No one does."
Aiden sat down and stared blankly at James for a few moments. "If it helps, I know how this whole..." he waved hand in James' direction, "I know how it feels. I do. And it's fucked. Nothing anyone says will really make you feel better and that sick cold grip in your gut? Doesn't go away until they wake up and tell you themselves they're okay..."
He sighed and turned back to Harri, scratching his fingers through his hair to try and fix the sticking up bits, though it was an absentminded action as he studied Harri's face. He reached for her hand. "Have you eaten? Slept? Changed? I just... I'm not sure how much I can help with the details. I was zoning out through most of it. I just have a feeling you maybe weren't told for your own protection. He did this to himself. Did you know that? He made himself sick because there needed to be some way for him to come back from the dead or something." He shook his head. "It's too fucked up. I don't get it. But I guess at the end of the day, it can't be a bad thing right? He'll be himself and no lies. At least, not where it counts."
Harri's eyes went wide as she looked from Aiden to James. "No, I didn't know that," she said in a hoarse voice. Her hand shook as she pushed her fingers through her tangled locks. "And I tried to eat yesterday. I haven't changed. I haven't been back to the apartment to get any clothes... And I slept for two hours last night. And two hours the night before. I just feel too sick... that sick cold grip in my gut isn't letting me do much of anything."
Aiden nodded. He really understood, even if he hadn't been pregnant when Pat was sick. "I hate hospitals," he mumured quietly, not for any particular reason. "I won't push you. If you need anything, you just tell me and you'll have it. I just don't want to stress you out. I'm getting good at the secondary vigil thing. To think, the biggest thing I used to worry about was my tie matching my shirt. You know, the guy hasn't given me much to like about him up until now, but all of a sudden, I just think... I think he did this for you and the kid. Probably on the face of it he had a lot of reasons to go this way and do it how he did, which he didn't do it alone. I got the feeling this Alex dude was in on the whole thing. But I think right deep down, the decision came for some reason. A reason important enough to risk his life to get it."
Harri wiped away her tears and sniffed as she looked at Aiden. "I need you to go to the apartment and get me his Rugby jersey. Please... I want to wear that, not this fucking stupid suit. And I just need you here. I don't really... I don't know what I need. Besides him awake. If he did this for us, then he needs to wake up so I can smack him for scaring the shit out of me. I can still see him lying there in a pool of his vomit. He could have fucking choked!"
Aiden put his arm around and pulled her against him, kissing her head. "I don't buy that you finding him like that when you didn't was an accident, love. Alex said he knew you were coming. I feel like I should still want to tear the guy's balls off for pulling that stunt with Cameron, but at the same time, it's like looking at an entirely different person. And maybe he is. See, in my head, when you actually met a guy you started dating and falling for, he was like a rich lawyer with a trendy haircut and a goldfish who liked red wine and dabbled in the stock market."
Harri gripped at Aiden's clothing and let herself relax into his embrace. God, she'd needed him so much... If she ever saw Alex again she'd thank him. After tearing his balls off for lying to her. "I'd kill him if I didn't love him so fucking much. Bastard. And also, your head clearly forgot how much I hate lawyers."
Aiden waved his hand lightly. "That's irrelevant. He was still relatively normal and maybe even scratched his balls in private to not offend you. I'm just saying... all this, it's giving me a migraine. But it's okay. I guess we'll just deal with it. I mean, the whole hospital gown thing really doesn't suit him. We can't be too harsh on him. He's a fashion road smash and don't even get me started on the decor of this place. There is no Feng Shui whatsoever." He glanced at her with a small smirk. "Hypothetically... or not. What's going through your mind right now?"
"I want him out of that gown, and back home. I want him to be okay. I want us to be okay... I don't want him to wake up and realise he's made a mistake," she murmured. "I love him, Aiden. And I really hate this fucking suit right now... I don't know why. I just hate it."
Aiden tucked his arm around his stomach, but then shifted in his seat again, absentmindedly curling his wedding ring around his finger. "What if he's a different person now? What if it turns out you don't love this James Campbell? It could happen. I'm not saying it will, but if he's so different to his undercover persona, I guess there is a possibility. Or how are you going to take it now he doesn't have all the secrets and is actually part of this whole other... established life? With friends and family and old work colleagues?"
"Funny you should mention that," Harri replied with a wry smile. "I was talking to his partner... ex-wife. Whatever she is. Best friend... Apparently I knew more of James Campbell than I thought. I don't think it's possible for me to not love him. I just have to be prepared for what comes next. I don't know what that is, though. Getting to know his family and friends, I guess. Getting used to the fact that he doesn't have to hide. That we don't have to hide."
"He must've been pretty messed up to get to this point, love," Aiden guessed. "Last few times I saw him, there was just something disconnected about him. When you first met him, he seemed to have this real bitchy mischievous streak, but then it was just gone. He must've really been missing his life and feeling normal. Maybe you can help him find that again. It's pretty nice, you know. The whole normal thing. Not at all overrated."
"Can I tell you something?" Harri asked, moving back to look up at him.
Aiden met her eyes again, his forehead creasing. "Yeah, of course," he said, even though he was a little worried what might come.
"I want normal," she admitted in a rush of air. "I know I said I could take all that SS crap, but I just want normal. Maybe the FBI will be slightly more normal. I just want to sit at home getting fat and pregnant and have him next to me."
Aiden looked at her, his blue eyes intent on her face. Probably at any other time he would have made some crack or teased her about the admission. But was just silent at first. He soon smiled a little and shook his head. "No, you don't. You just want to be able to have that some days when you feel like it. I know you. You could never totally give up being Harriet Ryan just like he obviously couldn't totally give up being James Campbell," he said quietly.
Her head fell back against Aiden's shoulder, and she sighed. "Yeah, you're right. Besides, Harriet Ryan still has the best clothes."
Aiden looked at her outfit with a snigger. "You reckon? And you call yourself a fag hag," he teased.
"You try keeping your suit smooth after sitting in a hospital chair for two days. I reliquish my fag hag title until he's awake so I can wear his jersey and be comfortable in peace."
"My suits are perfection," Aiden said with a light shrug. "I'm gay. I'm born pressed and color-coordinated. And hey, I can't knock the jersey. I saw my husband in one for the first time the other day and it took all my effort not to jump him."
Harri managed a grin. "Your husband... I'm still getting used to that, but it definitely becomes you."
Aiden's face lit up and he nodded. "I know. Some days, it still feels unreal. I really have no clue what I did to deserve it, but I must've been fucking fantastic," he said with a smirk.
Harri nuzzled against him, and tried to take comfort in his happiness. "I'm sorry you had to leave him to come here."
Aiden shook his head. "It's okay. I mean, yeah, I miss him. But he's patched things up with Cameron, so he's going to stick around in Britain until Cameron can come back here. He's going to be doing his rehab in Princeton. I think they need to spend some time together. It'll be good for them. It was just a relief the fight got resolved. I think Cameron's accident just brought a lot home to them both. It's probably going to be the same with you and Marcus James Fraser Campbell over here."
"I'm glad they worked it out. I'm glad Cameron's okay. I'm sure Izzy will be relieved as well..." Harri wiped at her eyes again, and sniffed. "How long have I got you for?"
"Until I pass out cold? It's, like," Aiden looked at his watch, "two am in Britain right now. I've been up since around four am so we could drive from Liverpool to Edinburgh to make the christening at eleven am. Special Agent Suit nabbed me from the party at five pm British time. The flight was seven hours and we got stuck in the morning rush hour traffic to get here to the hospital. Probably got another hour in me until I start talking in tongues, but if I can catch some sleep, I can hang around for as long as you need me. It doesn't look like Pat and Cameron will actually be coming home for another week or so, at the very least, so I'll just stick around here until they do. Then if he's still in a coma, you'll probably have both me and Pat haunting you after that. I'll make sure he doesn't jump up on the bed singing football songs to the whole ward."
"Why do I feel like there's a story there?" Harri asked with a slight smile. She squeezed Aiden's hand. "You should go sleep at our place. Then bring me back the jersey when you're ready for hospital duty. At least one of us should be getting sleep."
Aiden stifled a small yawn. "Alex told me he's not going to wake up any time soon. Especially not in the next forty eight hours. You go home and sleep for a bit. I'll wait here until you come back and then we can switch off. If you don't look after yourself, the kid's going to suffer, if it isn't already," he told her pointedly.
Harri's hand drifted to her belly and she looked like this was the first time she'd remembered she was pregnant. It wasn't something she forgot, but it was something that hadn't been at the forefront of her mind. "Bugger," she cursed quietly. She looked at James, then at Aiden, and sighed. "Okay, but you will call me if anything changes, won't you?"
Aiden nodded. "Yeah, of course. But it won't. Just try and take comfort in that. He's not going to wake up, so don't go home thinking he will and you won't be here. He injected himself with glucose, love. That's like the equivalent of a drug overdose. It's a substance his body can't process without his insulin, which he wasn't taking. Alex said he'll be out until his system filters it. So, just try and get some rest. Take a shower and try and eat something too. I'll be right here when you get back," he promised.
Harri nodded as she pulled herself out of her chair and first gave James a kiss on the forehead before she gave Aiden a brief hug and kissed his temple. "Thank you so much for coming, love. I don't know what I'd do without you."
"You won't need to find out. I'm sure one day, our positions will be reversed and I'll be needing you to send me home to sleep, too..." Aiden murmured and squeezed her hand. "Love you."
"Love you too, Aiden. And if that day ever comes, I will definitely be there. I promise." She kissed the top of his head before dragging herself away from James' hospital room. There was still a concern that he might wake up while she was gone, but she trusted Aiden to look after him. She also realised that she really did need to go home and take care of herself, and her unborn child.
Words: 3615 | All muses referred to with permission and come from the princeton2nyc verse