Picspam/Cara Recap: 2.11 Torn, 2.12 Hunger
This one got away from me a little, especially Hunger. First half is very Kahlan heavy, second half is almost entirely Cara (and Cara/Kahlan) Also this is like halfway between a recap, an ode to Cara's feeeelings and a fanfic because I got a little carried away with the commentary on Hunger.
2.11 Torn
So they’re talking about a Romantic Waterfall. Or something. (I mock but I love these little random bits at the start of episodes). Kahlan is all gushy and romantic and Cara’s all ITS WHERE A BATTLE TOOK PLACE which she talks about at some length. It’s unclear if she does actually consider this to be romantic, though since it’s Cara she probably does. It’s cute how they share their interests. They find tortured bodies (Cara: “Not very inspired work.”) and there’s some plot about Prince Feyran taking over Aydindril.
A Wizard teleports to them and they grab their weapons unf. Plot plot plot. Kahlan says she has to go to Aydindril and Cara’s all BUT THAT’S MILES AWAY and really it’s because she doesn’t want Kahlan to go. Zedd and Kahlan are going to go, Richard and Cara will stay to continue the quest. Zedd does the spell and Kahlan looks over at Cara and Richard and says “I WISH I DIDN’T HAVE TO GO” and due to unfortunate editing it looks like she says this to Cara who has her feelings face on and of whom we get a reaction shot from AND REALLY THE EDITORS ARE DOING MY JOB FOR ME HERE.
AND THEN AND THEN THE AMULET SPLITS KAHLAN IN TWO AND REALLY THIS SHOW IS DOING MY WORK FOR ME. And it’s feeeeelings Kahlan and Confessor Kahlan and suddenly my banging on about Love Feeeelings vs. Duty makes more sense doesn’t it? Confessor Kahlan is toppy as hell and part of me is sad Cara isn’t there cuz honestly I think they’d get on like a house on fire.
ANYWAY. In the plot C!Kahlan is all GET OUT OF MY CHAIR BITCH and confesses Feyran and she’s all bad ass and HBIC. She’s all THE RULE OF LAW WILL BE RETURNED TO THE MIDLANDS. And this is the theme you guys, this is THE THEME.
F!Kahlan, Richard and Cara fight some bad guys and Cara looks especially hot whilst doing so. AND THEN F!Kahlan’s power doesn’t work duh duh duuuuh. And I could make a joke about ~performing especially when Kahlan is like THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE I SWEAR. Hilariously, Cara is like I ASKED OUR FRIENDS IF I COULD BORROW THEIR HORSES *cuts to dead bodies of the bad guys* THEY DIDN’T OBJECT. And guys, I just love her so much. I don’t even know what that says about me.
Then C!Kahlan is observing the letter of the law in a way that she normally wouldn’t and Zedd is all SOMETHING IS WRONG. I love that it takes him this long to figure it out. Like Zedd’s totally cool with her being a badass until she refuses to let a guy grow his hand back.
F!Kahlan wakes up Richard all, I ER NEED TO TALK TO YOU. Cara (who is on watch) LOLs like I know where you’re going. Kahlan is all sexytiems plz and sadly it’s Richard who steps up rather than Cara. Also it’s hilarious yet sad how F!Kahlan still can’t say any words relating to sex. Even her unbridled Feeeelings are repressed.
C!Kahlan meanwhile tops the hell out of Prince Feyran to ~further the line of Confessors and my lord Bridget Regan knows how to wear a corset. Then we’re treated to a sex montage and just - UNF.
The next morning F!Kahlan is still trying to jump Richard. Richard gets dressed and says they have to get back. Cara’s all HIGH FIVE BRO with Richard and pulls a leaf out of his hair. F!Kahlan is like WTF BITCH MY MAAAAN. Hilariously, Kahlan is like YOU HAD YOUR HANDS ALL OVER HIM. Cara, utterly perplexed (and her perplexed face is adorable you guys) is like I was taking a leaf out of his hair! Then Kahlan says YOU CAN’T STAND THAT RICHARD AND I WERE TOGETHER LAST NIGHT CAN YOU. Cara VERY QUICKLY replies WHY WOULD I CARE? But it’s... defensive but also a little amused like CAN’T YOU SEE I LOVE YOU, and you guys she totally does care but not for the reasons F!Kahlan thinks. Also hilarious is Kahlan saying Cara has been after Richard since he “rescued” her from the Mord’Sith and Cara’s voice gets all low and dangerous like NO ONE RESCUED ME. Also of note, Cara says If I wanted HIM I would have had him already. SHE TOTALLY DOESN’T WANT HIM SHE WANTS KAHLAN AND ALMOST ADMITTED IT. F!Kahlan flounces off to write in her feelings journal and we’re left with Cara looking equal parts horrified and amused. Like THIS IS WHAT FEELINGS DO TO A PERSON (ILU). F!Kahlan asks Richard to run away with her but he refuses because now Richard is playing the part of her sense of duty. “Something’s wrong with you. You didn’t just lose your powers, you lost... something else.” Her sanity perhaps? So they shoot off to Aydindril to find C!Kahlan.
Back with C!Kahlan, Zedd is all WTF YOU SLEPT WITH FEYRAN? “I don’t have the luxury of LOVE, I have a DUTY.” Then C!Kahlan disbands the Council of the Midlands and becomes srs HBIC. Then she threatens Zedd and tells him to bugger off back to Richard and Cara. Zedd conspires with another Wizard who C!Kahlan has confessed and gets caught. C!Kahlan CONDEMNS ZEDD TO DEATH just as F!Kahlan, Richard and Cara arrive. F!Kahlan: “Who is that?” Cara: “It’s you!” Like her best dream is coming true now that there are two Kahlans one of which is a top.
Plot plot plot but what’s important is that Kahlan has split heart/head love/duty etc. Richard speaks out for Zedd but C!Kahlan is having none of it. Richard does the big reveal and both halves are face to face with each other and DO I REALLY NEED TO POINT OUT THAT THERE ARE TWO BRIDGET REGANS ON THE SCREEN AND I’M FINDING IT HARD TO THINK? F!Kahlan looks really cute and vulnerable. She tries to bargain with Richard to stay separate and be his wife and when’s she saying I CAN BE EVERYTHING THAT YOU WANT we cut to Cara who looks... IDK disappointed? Like she doesn’t want them to get married? She’s having feelings you guys is what I’m trying to say. ALSO F!KAHLAN SAYS I’D LOVE CARA LIKE A SISTER AND YOU CAN HAVE HER TOO IF THAT’S WHAT YOU WANT. C!Kahlan snorts a little at this because she knows Cara totally wants Kahlan.
FIGHT. Cara is hot and hits people in many glorious ways. THEN KAHLAN CONFESSES HERSELF FJKDJFLKSD. THEN CARA AWESOMELY CAPTURES C!KAHLAN BECAUSE SHE GETS SHIT DONE and C!Kahlan is totally turned on as she stares at Cara’s magic dildo agiel. They totally have eye!sex and I’m glad because it’s been a while. THEN THE WITH CHILD MOMENT HAPPENS and I think the lolz are well documented in fandom. Go and look, I’ll wait. Zedd puts them back together while Cara stands in the background all butch and hot and does she really have to stand like that all the time? UNF. Of course, Kahlan doesn’t remember anything that happened so she doesn’t remember the sexytiems which LOL. Blah Blah Kahlan says she’ll always be torn but her place is with Cara Richard.
RANDOM CAP TANGENT: Cara's face in this cap kills me. Like she's just realised Richard has leaves in his hair - and what that means - and she's so sad because he gets Kahlan and she doesn't but she can't say anything cuz he's her Lord Rahl. (Yes I got all of that from one pic.)
2.12 Hunger
I spent much of this episode doing this: OH CARA *FLAIL*. Just fyi. Thaddicus takes Sebastian some Shadow Water which may or may not be a plot point later and can I just say OH HAI JOXER TED RAIMI ILU. A damsel in distress comes riding up to Richard and asks for help and Cara is all WE HAVE A QUEST, WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO REMEMBERS THIS. Anyway, Banelings have kidnapped people and they go to help despite Cara’s barely concealed anger. SHE ACTUALLY TWITCHES IN DISGUST. I love her.
They find the Banelings and fighting ensues and seriously the fights are usually hot but my god Cara and Kahlan kick some ass in this scene. Plus Cara looks really happy when she’s torturing people with her agiels which I like. Richard sends Cara to go track the driver. The driver gets the drop on Cara (literally from a tree) slits her throat, Cara kills him, demands to know where the captives are, he tells her, then she dies. IN THAT ORDER. I JUST LOVE HER COMMITMENT TO THE CAUSE. Like she didn’t need to ask where the captives were, she’s dying, she could just kill him to get revenge and then die BUT SHE DIDN’T. Feeelings.
Hilariously, Cara wakes up in the underworld and unlike everyone else is all OH WHATEV UNDERWORLD WHERE’S RAHL? RAHL MAKE ME A BANELING. LIKE YESTERDAY. Also Cara does that smirky smile thing a lot in this scene which I AM A FAN OF. There’s exposition in which Rahl explains baneling mythology slowly in a way that can be repeated later but what’s important is that Cara looks HOT. Also she has a few feelings.
She wakes up and kicks the guy who killed her in that awesome way she does. Richard is all WHATS THAT ON YOUR NECK? Cara tells them where the guy took the prisoners and then eyes up the confessed guy like he’s a piece of soon to be dead meat. Kahlan steps in her way to stop her and STANDS VERY CLOSE and they have eye!sex some more.
The good guys break up a baneling party and Cara doesn’t manage to kill anyone who’s actually alive, which sucks for her though she tries to go after one guy but her sense of duty gets in the way and she has to save Richard from a guy who creeps up on him.
A Baneling realises Cara’s dilemma and asks why she took the bargain. Cara looks over at Richard, Kahlan and Zedd with her feelings face on and then says I DID IT TO STAY ALIVE AND PROTECT THE SEEKER. And while she’s not lying, she’s not telling the whole truth either. Not to belabour the point but this is Cara’s equivalent to Torn. This is how she learns to balance her head and heart, her duty and her love. This is what happens when her feelings take over.
ANYWAY, the baneling tells them about the Shadow Water and then dies while Cara looks on and what she’s gotten herself into is starting to hit home. That night when they make camp, Cara runs off to kill someone before running back in the morning, and it’s clear she thinks she’s got them fooled, but the only person she’s really fooling is herself. She gets back to camp and everyone agrees she looks better this morning. Kahlan wordlessly tosses Cara her pack like HERE’S YOUR EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE DEAR and they carry on like nothing is wrong.
(If your heart does not break a little when you look at these caps you are probably dead inside.) Meanwhile Thaddicus and Sebastian are watering the Shadow Water down and scamming people. A baneling is about to kill them when the gang come in and fighting happens. Cara looks both menacing and conflicted in the background. Her feelings are starting to show. I think it’s interesting that the closer she comes to death the more her feelings start to show. When she gives up everything she just lets herself FEEL and it’s heartbreaking.
Zedd and Thaddicus talk about the Shadow Water and Cara dares to look hopeful. And if anyone wondered why she’s asking selfless questions like “Is there more? Can you make more?” they don’t say anything. Zedd uses Sebastian’s mapmaker to er make a map to take them to the source of Shadow Water while Cara looks utterly devastated and vulnerable when she realises it’s three days away. That night she runs off again and kills a D’Haran that is conveniently located nearby.
The next night there aren’t any nearby evil doers. Rahl appears to her in a dream all WHY ARE YOU NOT KILLING PEOPLE INDISRIMINATELY LIKE YOU USED TO? WHY DON’T YOU KILL ONE OF THEM? ALTERNATIVELY YOU CAN TELL ME WHERE THE SHADOW WATER IS THANKS. Cara point blank refuses, because she’s a hero now, and Rahl tells her to kill Thaddicus because no one cares about him. She wakes up, grabs a knife and creeps over to Thaddicus. She hesitates then stops herself and Thaddicus realises she’s a baneling.
Cara just looks devastated. Kahlan is looking equally heartbroken and asks why she took the deal and Cara, staring into her eyes, voice breaking says, I HAD TO, TO GET BACK AND TELL YOU WHERE THE KIDNAPPER HAD TAKEN THE CAPTIVES. She had to help. She had to be the hero. She’s trying to find redemption, and falling in love, and she couldn’t leave that, not now. Not now Kahlan is finally seeing Cara for who she is trying to be. Then with an afterthought - because that means she cares too much and she needs to retreat back to her duty - “And I had to protect you, Richard.”
Kahlan looks like she doesn’t know whether to cry or kiss Cara right now, I swear to god. And it’s like that time when Cara apologised to Dennee and Kahlan realised that she loved Cara and when Cara tells them to go because she doesn’t want them to see her like this with tears in her voice, all Kahlan can do is hope for one tiny moment that Zedd can help her, but he can’t. So then Kahlan does the only thing she can which is kneel in front of Cara, put her hand on her shoulder, stare into her eyes and ask the Creator to watch over her, because the one thing Kahlan has that Cara doesn’t is faith. Faith in the Creator, faith that if people do the right thing they get rewarded, faith in Cara to be brave and face this down like the Mord’Sith she is. They share a moment, and Cara takes a little gasping breathe like she can’t believe it takes nearly dying to get Kahlan to touch her and look at her like that when all it used to take was an agiel.
And then Thaddicus uses the knife in Cara’s hand to kill himself so she can go on living. And Kahlan’s hand is still on Cara’s shoulder like she can’t let go of her now she’s truly seen her and when Cara’s face heals itself Kahlan stares as if she’s seeing her for the first time. AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE SYMBOLISM OF HER HEALING FACE FOR A SECOND? Her baneling face is her ugly Mord’Sith past and she’s trying, one day at a time, to kill that part off but it just keeps coming back. This time when her past fades it isn’t because she’s killed it, it’s because someone else saw her worth and made the choice to forfeit their life for hers. Like Leo saw her and accepted her for who she was and how Kahlan is looking at her now. When Kahlan sees Cara’s face heal she sees that finally someone else sees what she’s already seen in Cara and she’s grateful because maybe now Cara might start to believe it. (She won’t but that’s the story of another episode.)
Richard and Cara take off running for the Shadow Water while Rahl tortures Thaddicus in the underworld so he can destroy the source and Cara will remain a baneling. Richard and Cara just about make it and Cara drinks enough to come back to life. She gives Thaddicus the Breath of Life to bring him back and then stands around all nervous like she doesn’t know how to behave now she’s shown so much of herself to them. Cara asks Thaddicus why he did it, and he says because Cara’s important and her life is more valuable than his. Cara gets tears in her eyes because this is her Achilles heel and the one thing she will never believe.
Afterwards Cara tries to put them back on familiar ground by being self flagellating and all I BET YOU THINK I’M A MONSTER FOR TAKING THE DEAL. Kahlan says she might have done the same thing and she frames it like it’s about duty and protecting Richard but really it’s about being with the ones you love. They have eye!sex and both smile a little like we understand each other now, and this is when they first acknowledge their feelings I think and it starts to become something more tangible and real for them both. Which is why in the next episode Cara is willing to do whatever it takes EVEN DEFER TO HER MASCULINE BETTERS (there’s no such thing) in order to rescue Kahlan.
2.11 Torn
So they’re talking about a Romantic Waterfall. Or something. (I mock but I love these little random bits at the start of episodes). Kahlan is all gushy and romantic and Cara’s all ITS WHERE A BATTLE TOOK PLACE which she talks about at some length. It’s unclear if she does actually consider this to be romantic, though since it’s Cara she probably does. It’s cute how they share their interests. They find tortured bodies (Cara: “Not very inspired work.”) and there’s some plot about Prince Feyran taking over Aydindril.
A Wizard teleports to them and they grab their weapons unf. Plot plot plot. Kahlan says she has to go to Aydindril and Cara’s all BUT THAT’S MILES AWAY and really it’s because she doesn’t want Kahlan to go. Zedd and Kahlan are going to go, Richard and Cara will stay to continue the quest. Zedd does the spell and Kahlan looks over at Cara and Richard and says “I WISH I DIDN’T HAVE TO GO” and due to unfortunate editing it looks like she says this to Cara who has her feelings face on and of whom we get a reaction shot from AND REALLY THE EDITORS ARE DOING MY JOB FOR ME HERE.
AND THEN AND THEN THE AMULET SPLITS KAHLAN IN TWO AND REALLY THIS SHOW IS DOING MY WORK FOR ME. And it’s feeeeelings Kahlan and Confessor Kahlan and suddenly my banging on about Love Feeeelings vs. Duty makes more sense doesn’t it? Confessor Kahlan is toppy as hell and part of me is sad Cara isn’t there cuz honestly I think they’d get on like a house on fire.
ANYWAY. In the plot C!Kahlan is all GET OUT OF MY CHAIR BITCH and confesses Feyran and she’s all bad ass and HBIC. She’s all THE RULE OF LAW WILL BE RETURNED TO THE MIDLANDS. And this is the theme you guys, this is THE THEME.
F!Kahlan, Richard and Cara fight some bad guys and Cara looks especially hot whilst doing so. AND THEN F!Kahlan’s power doesn’t work duh duh duuuuh. And I could make a joke about ~performing especially when Kahlan is like THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE I SWEAR. Hilariously, Cara is like I ASKED OUR FRIENDS IF I COULD BORROW THEIR HORSES *cuts to dead bodies of the bad guys* THEY DIDN’T OBJECT. And guys, I just love her so much. I don’t even know what that says about me.
Then C!Kahlan is observing the letter of the law in a way that she normally wouldn’t and Zedd is all SOMETHING IS WRONG. I love that it takes him this long to figure it out. Like Zedd’s totally cool with her being a badass until she refuses to let a guy grow his hand back.
F!Kahlan wakes up Richard all, I ER NEED TO TALK TO YOU. Cara (who is on watch) LOLs like I know where you’re going. Kahlan is all sexytiems plz and sadly it’s Richard who steps up rather than Cara. Also it’s hilarious yet sad how F!Kahlan still can’t say any words relating to sex. Even her unbridled Feeeelings are repressed.
C!Kahlan meanwhile tops the hell out of Prince Feyran to ~further the line of Confessors and my lord Bridget Regan knows how to wear a corset. Then we’re treated to a sex montage and just - UNF.
The next morning F!Kahlan is still trying to jump Richard. Richard gets dressed and says they have to get back. Cara’s all HIGH FIVE BRO with Richard and pulls a leaf out of his hair. F!Kahlan is like WTF BITCH MY MAAAAN. Hilariously, Kahlan is like YOU HAD YOUR HANDS ALL OVER HIM. Cara, utterly perplexed (and her perplexed face is adorable you guys) is like I was taking a leaf out of his hair! Then Kahlan says YOU CAN’T STAND THAT RICHARD AND I WERE TOGETHER LAST NIGHT CAN YOU. Cara VERY QUICKLY replies WHY WOULD I CARE? But it’s... defensive but also a little amused like CAN’T YOU SEE I LOVE YOU, and you guys she totally does care but not for the reasons F!Kahlan thinks. Also hilarious is Kahlan saying Cara has been after Richard since he “rescued” her from the Mord’Sith and Cara’s voice gets all low and dangerous like NO ONE RESCUED ME. Also of note, Cara says If I wanted HIM I would have had him already. SHE TOTALLY DOESN’T WANT HIM SHE WANTS KAHLAN AND ALMOST ADMITTED IT. F!Kahlan flounces off to write in her feelings journal and we’re left with Cara looking equal parts horrified and amused. Like THIS IS WHAT FEELINGS DO TO A PERSON (ILU). F!Kahlan asks Richard to run away with her but he refuses because now Richard is playing the part of her sense of duty. “Something’s wrong with you. You didn’t just lose your powers, you lost... something else.” Her sanity perhaps? So they shoot off to Aydindril to find C!Kahlan.
Back with C!Kahlan, Zedd is all WTF YOU SLEPT WITH FEYRAN? “I don’t have the luxury of LOVE, I have a DUTY.” Then C!Kahlan disbands the Council of the Midlands and becomes srs HBIC. Then she threatens Zedd and tells him to bugger off back to Richard and Cara. Zedd conspires with another Wizard who C!Kahlan has confessed and gets caught. C!Kahlan CONDEMNS ZEDD TO DEATH just as F!Kahlan, Richard and Cara arrive. F!Kahlan: “Who is that?” Cara: “It’s you!” Like her best dream is coming true now that there are two Kahlans one of which is a top.
Plot plot plot but what’s important is that Kahlan has split heart/head love/duty etc. Richard speaks out for Zedd but C!Kahlan is having none of it. Richard does the big reveal and both halves are face to face with each other and DO I REALLY NEED TO POINT OUT THAT THERE ARE TWO BRIDGET REGANS ON THE SCREEN AND I’M FINDING IT HARD TO THINK? F!Kahlan looks really cute and vulnerable. She tries to bargain with Richard to stay separate and be his wife and when’s she saying I CAN BE EVERYTHING THAT YOU WANT we cut to Cara who looks... IDK disappointed? Like she doesn’t want them to get married? She’s having feelings you guys is what I’m trying to say. ALSO F!KAHLAN SAYS I’D LOVE CARA LIKE A SISTER AND YOU CAN HAVE HER TOO IF THAT’S WHAT YOU WANT. C!Kahlan snorts a little at this because she knows Cara totally wants Kahlan.
FIGHT. Cara is hot and hits people in many glorious ways. THEN KAHLAN CONFESSES HERSELF FJKDJFLKSD. THEN CARA AWESOMELY CAPTURES C!KAHLAN BECAUSE SHE GETS SHIT DONE and C!Kahlan is totally turned on as she stares at Cara’s magic dildo agiel. They totally have eye!sex and I’m glad because it’s been a while. THEN THE WITH CHILD MOMENT HAPPENS and I think the lolz are well documented in fandom. Go and look, I’ll wait. Zedd puts them back together while Cara stands in the background all butch and hot and does she really have to stand like that all the time? UNF. Of course, Kahlan doesn’t remember anything that happened so she doesn’t remember the sexytiems which LOL. Blah Blah Kahlan says she’ll always be torn but her place is with Cara Richard.
RANDOM CAP TANGENT: Cara's face in this cap kills me. Like she's just realised Richard has leaves in his hair - and what that means - and she's so sad because he gets Kahlan and she doesn't but she can't say anything cuz he's her Lord Rahl. (Yes I got all of that from one pic.)
2.12 Hunger
I spent much of this episode doing this: OH CARA *FLAIL*. Just fyi. Thaddicus takes Sebastian some Shadow Water which may or may not be a plot point later and can I just say OH HAI JOXER TED RAIMI ILU. A damsel in distress comes riding up to Richard and asks for help and Cara is all WE HAVE A QUEST, WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO REMEMBERS THIS. Anyway, Banelings have kidnapped people and they go to help despite Cara’s barely concealed anger. SHE ACTUALLY TWITCHES IN DISGUST. I love her.
They find the Banelings and fighting ensues and seriously the fights are usually hot but my god Cara and Kahlan kick some ass in this scene. Plus Cara looks really happy when she’s torturing people with her agiels which I like. Richard sends Cara to go track the driver. The driver gets the drop on Cara (literally from a tree) slits her throat, Cara kills him, demands to know where the captives are, he tells her, then she dies. IN THAT ORDER. I JUST LOVE HER COMMITMENT TO THE CAUSE. Like she didn’t need to ask where the captives were, she’s dying, she could just kill him to get revenge and then die BUT SHE DIDN’T. Feeelings.
Hilariously, Cara wakes up in the underworld and unlike everyone else is all OH WHATEV UNDERWORLD WHERE’S RAHL? RAHL MAKE ME A BANELING. LIKE YESTERDAY. Also Cara does that smirky smile thing a lot in this scene which I AM A FAN OF. There’s exposition in which Rahl explains baneling mythology slowly in a way that can be repeated later but what’s important is that Cara looks HOT. Also she has a few feelings.
She wakes up and kicks the guy who killed her in that awesome way she does. Richard is all WHATS THAT ON YOUR NECK? Cara tells them where the guy took the prisoners and then eyes up the confessed guy like he’s a piece of soon to be dead meat. Kahlan steps in her way to stop her and STANDS VERY CLOSE and they have eye!sex some more.
The good guys break up a baneling party and Cara doesn’t manage to kill anyone who’s actually alive, which sucks for her though she tries to go after one guy but her sense of duty gets in the way and she has to save Richard from a guy who creeps up on him.
A Baneling realises Cara’s dilemma and asks why she took the bargain. Cara looks over at Richard, Kahlan and Zedd with her feelings face on and then says I DID IT TO STAY ALIVE AND PROTECT THE SEEKER. And while she’s not lying, she’s not telling the whole truth either. Not to belabour the point but this is Cara’s equivalent to Torn. This is how she learns to balance her head and heart, her duty and her love. This is what happens when her feelings take over.
ANYWAY, the baneling tells them about the Shadow Water and then dies while Cara looks on and what she’s gotten herself into is starting to hit home. That night when they make camp, Cara runs off to kill someone before running back in the morning, and it’s clear she thinks she’s got them fooled, but the only person she’s really fooling is herself. She gets back to camp and everyone agrees she looks better this morning. Kahlan wordlessly tosses Cara her pack like HERE’S YOUR EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE DEAR and they carry on like nothing is wrong.
(If your heart does not break a little when you look at these caps you are probably dead inside.) Meanwhile Thaddicus and Sebastian are watering the Shadow Water down and scamming people. A baneling is about to kill them when the gang come in and fighting happens. Cara looks both menacing and conflicted in the background. Her feelings are starting to show. I think it’s interesting that the closer she comes to death the more her feelings start to show. When she gives up everything she just lets herself FEEL and it’s heartbreaking.
Zedd and Thaddicus talk about the Shadow Water and Cara dares to look hopeful. And if anyone wondered why she’s asking selfless questions like “Is there more? Can you make more?” they don’t say anything. Zedd uses Sebastian’s mapmaker to er make a map to take them to the source of Shadow Water while Cara looks utterly devastated and vulnerable when she realises it’s three days away. That night she runs off again and kills a D’Haran that is conveniently located nearby.
The next night there aren’t any nearby evil doers. Rahl appears to her in a dream all WHY ARE YOU NOT KILLING PEOPLE INDISRIMINATELY LIKE YOU USED TO? WHY DON’T YOU KILL ONE OF THEM? ALTERNATIVELY YOU CAN TELL ME WHERE THE SHADOW WATER IS THANKS. Cara point blank refuses, because she’s a hero now, and Rahl tells her to kill Thaddicus because no one cares about him. She wakes up, grabs a knife and creeps over to Thaddicus. She hesitates then stops herself and Thaddicus realises she’s a baneling.
Cara just looks devastated. Kahlan is looking equally heartbroken and asks why she took the deal and Cara, staring into her eyes, voice breaking says, I HAD TO, TO GET BACK AND TELL YOU WHERE THE KIDNAPPER HAD TAKEN THE CAPTIVES. She had to help. She had to be the hero. She’s trying to find redemption, and falling in love, and she couldn’t leave that, not now. Not now Kahlan is finally seeing Cara for who she is trying to be. Then with an afterthought - because that means she cares too much and she needs to retreat back to her duty - “And I had to protect you, Richard.”
Kahlan looks like she doesn’t know whether to cry or kiss Cara right now, I swear to god. And it’s like that time when Cara apologised to Dennee and Kahlan realised that she loved Cara and when Cara tells them to go because she doesn’t want them to see her like this with tears in her voice, all Kahlan can do is hope for one tiny moment that Zedd can help her, but he can’t. So then Kahlan does the only thing she can which is kneel in front of Cara, put her hand on her shoulder, stare into her eyes and ask the Creator to watch over her, because the one thing Kahlan has that Cara doesn’t is faith. Faith in the Creator, faith that if people do the right thing they get rewarded, faith in Cara to be brave and face this down like the Mord’Sith she is. They share a moment, and Cara takes a little gasping breathe like she can’t believe it takes nearly dying to get Kahlan to touch her and look at her like that when all it used to take was an agiel.
And then Thaddicus uses the knife in Cara’s hand to kill himself so she can go on living. And Kahlan’s hand is still on Cara’s shoulder like she can’t let go of her now she’s truly seen her and when Cara’s face heals itself Kahlan stares as if she’s seeing her for the first time. AND CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE SYMBOLISM OF HER HEALING FACE FOR A SECOND? Her baneling face is her ugly Mord’Sith past and she’s trying, one day at a time, to kill that part off but it just keeps coming back. This time when her past fades it isn’t because she’s killed it, it’s because someone else saw her worth and made the choice to forfeit their life for hers. Like Leo saw her and accepted her for who she was and how Kahlan is looking at her now. When Kahlan sees Cara’s face heal she sees that finally someone else sees what she’s already seen in Cara and she’s grateful because maybe now Cara might start to believe it. (She won’t but that’s the story of another episode.)
Richard and Cara take off running for the Shadow Water while Rahl tortures Thaddicus in the underworld so he can destroy the source and Cara will remain a baneling. Richard and Cara just about make it and Cara drinks enough to come back to life. She gives Thaddicus the Breath of Life to bring him back and then stands around all nervous like she doesn’t know how to behave now she’s shown so much of herself to them. Cara asks Thaddicus why he did it, and he says because Cara’s important and her life is more valuable than his. Cara gets tears in her eyes because this is her Achilles heel and the one thing she will never believe.
Afterwards Cara tries to put them back on familiar ground by being self flagellating and all I BET YOU THINK I’M A MONSTER FOR TAKING THE DEAL. Kahlan says she might have done the same thing and she frames it like it’s about duty and protecting Richard but really it’s about being with the ones you love. They have eye!sex and both smile a little like we understand each other now, and this is when they first acknowledge their feelings I think and it starts to become something more tangible and real for them both. Which is why in the next episode Cara is willing to do whatever it takes EVEN DEFER TO HER MASCULINE BETTERS (there’s no such thing) in order to rescue Kahlan.