today is going a little better...not by much...it amazes me to see how well i can hide things...i sometimes even fool myself...yea...i suck...i dont think i even know who i am anymore...

i feel really lost latley...dont know what i am doing with myself right now...anyways...chris came back...we had tons-o-fun...me and him two-steped to some Martyr AD at adams house...it was great...then he punched some random dude in the face...then he droped kicked some old fridge...it is good to have him home...well i am going for now...

NON LEVAL DEATHS DO NOT COUNT...

I cant get him out of my mind...the feel of his hand on my face...the way his look sends shivers down my spine...and i havnent even see him since saturday night/sunday morning...i felt safe sleeping in his arms...he is driving me crazy...i dont know what to do...Sierra (my little minion...gosh i ♥ that girl...) says that he looked happy with me on ( Read more... )

tell me how you manged to sweep me off of my feet so soon...you make me feel safe in your arms...i crave your touch...please tell me that you wont leave...you make me feel special...aahhuugg, i miss you already...on another note...i might be leaving for awhile...going to colorado...a friend of mine ((angela)) has a brain toumor...and her husband is ( Read more... )

It is amazing how things work out...life is funny thing....it is strange to see how life unflods...and for the first time in my life i am ok with it...i am not worried about what is gonna happen in the future...i have decided that i am just gonna live my lfe

I feel like i am not even in my own body...I feel like i am looking at myself through some one elses eyes...I dont even think I can even begin to explaine how that feels...I just need to record this feeling so I can remember this when i wake up...I dont even know who I am right now...I messed up pretty bad...i have done a complete 360 of who i was ( Read more... )

some time i sit and wonder how all of this works...how everyting seems to work out...things seem weird now...not to sure why...it is also weird to see back and look at who you were a year ago and how much things have changed...and how some things stay the same...and it is always the same thing that never changes...it is differnt for everyone...but ( Read more... )

it is almost time for me to go to my moms house...it feels strange to call it home...i kinda want austin to be here so i cal tell him bye...but i think i might cry if he is...ahh...i am such a loser...i went to lunch with russ, fat kyle, and kenny...i had fun...i hope that i dont have to wait for ever to get a new phone...i will i talk to people... ( Read more... )

I have this feeling like every one is out to get me...feeling a bit sktizo from it...i am moving back to my moms tomorrow...i think that it is for the best in a few ways...in some i am sad to see it end...i will miss austin...i feel like he is almost my brother...and i will miss seeing sarah all the time...I will miss you husband...well it is ( Read more... )