Worth Having 1/2
title: worth having
rating: r
pairing: siwon/kyuhyun
genre: fantasy, romance
part: 1/2
word count: 2332
summary: it's a different world now and it sucks.
He's not sure how or when it happened but somewhere between losing everything he's loved and promising to never love anything again, he's stumbled across another liability. It's standing in the kitchen now. Tall, overbearing, annoying, needy, and incredibly naive. Kyuhyun never even said it was okay for him to stay one night, much less the next thirty that followed. He'd taken pity on him the night he found him in his apartment, nearly frozen to death from the coldest winter they'd seen in years. He'd managed not to speak to him, figuring he'd die or disappear soon anyway, but now here he was, eating his food, drinking his beer, and sleeping in his house. Kyuhyun watches him from where he sits at the small wooden table in the dining area. Despite the world descending into a constant state of evening and ash, the man's skin is still tan, his body healthy, and his smile so genuine you'd think this desolate place was a dream. Kyuhyun tries not to watch too often. Anytime he catches his mind wondering from anything other than pity, he stalks up the staircase and opens the rusty tin door to the roof, reminding himself that there's nothing in this place to live or die for and the only way to survive is to remember that.
***
It's about a month before Siwon speaks to him for the first time.
"What's your name?"
Kyuhyun glances up from the bowl of cereal in front of him, his long lashes touching the chocolate bangs that rest just below his thick eyebrows. He doesn't respond and Siwon shifts awkwardly under his gaze.
"Do you have a power?"
Kyuhyun's eyes narrow and Siwon swallows. Okay, obviously, a touchy subject.
"Um, how long have you lived here?"
Still nothing.
"Right. Well, I just want to say thank you. For letting me stay here. I mean, you seem like-" before he can finish, the younger boy across the table rolls his eyes, the metal chair screeching across the wooden floor as he stands and turns his back, walking toward the kitchen.
***
Siwon starts having regular conversations with himself. He likes to think Kyuhyun listens to them, and he'll throw in a question every now and then for good measure, but it always goes unanswered. Siwon does his best to prove himself valuable around the apartment. He cleans what little mess the other makes and even offers his not-so-expertise cooking sometimes (though the younger never takes it). It's sort of like living with a ghost.
He sleeps on the floor opposite of Kyuhyun's bed and figures the other must find him pretty pathetic with no blanket and no pillow. Siwon knows looking a little pathetic is still better than sleeping, or more likely, getting killed on the streets. Kyuhyun strips off his shirt next to the large window adjacent to his floor mattress, the pale moonlight streaming through, and it's the first time he sees the scars that decorate his back like a maze. Prior to this night, he'd only seen silhouttes dance across the room when the world went dark, but now it was one of those rare evenings when the clouds parted and the moon was brighter than any of the starlight the world had left. Siwon lies on the floor across the room, his head resting on his arm as his only support and licks his lips as he watches the younger roll his head from side to side, stretch his arms over his head, and fall in a heap onto the mattress. It's the first time in a long time he doesn't mind the deafening silence.
***
A month goes by and Siwon's learned a lot about the other boy without him having spoken a single word. It's amazing what you can learn from someone just by watching. He learns that Kyuhyun likes to spend at least six to seven hours a day on the rooftop. He learns that when Kyuhyun is on the roof, he shoots at random vermin that run through the allies surronding the building. He learns that Kyuhyun never misses. He learns that Kyuhyun, despite knowing the dangers of the outside world, walks down the empty streets with no worries. At first Siwon thinks this is because he doesn't care if he lives or dies. Then Siwon learns that Kyuhyun doesn't breathe at night when he sleeps. He notices Kyuhyun never takes off the slick leather gloves that cover his fingers, even when he eats. Siwon learns that Kyuhyun avoids physical contact at all costs and eats the same tasteless breakfast every morning. Siwon also learns that he's a slow learner because Kyuhyun's power is obviously Death.
***
Kyuhyun stumbles through the door of their dimly lit apartment in the early hours of what someone might call morning. It's not as if they have a clock to go by or even a sun anymore. The only way Siwon knows it's morning is because during the time they sleep, Kyuhyun will wake up in the darkest hour and leave. He doesn't know where he goes and he doesn't ask, but he does take note of fresh bruises along his face or neck.
"I know what your power is."
Kyuhyun freezes halfway to his bed and turns to look at him on the floor
"You're Death, right?"
He doesn't answer him but from all the things Siwon's learned, he can tell from his expression that it isn't one of denial. He grins, "You know, for someone as quiet and mysterious as you, you're not so difficult to read."
***
Siwon thinks he's becoming obsessed with Kyuhyun. It's not as if he has music or television to entertain him anymore and after nearly three months of nothing but this dank shack and shell of a person to keep him company, he's grown rather fond of watching him. He's even given him a nickname.
"Tiffany, can you pass me the rice?"
Kyuhyun stares at him as he raises a brow.
"What's wrong, Tiffany?"
No response.
"I've been here for almost three months now and you still haven't given me your real name. I just thought you should know I've taken it upon myself to give you one. I thought about it for hours, days even!" Siwon makes an exaggerated sigh of mock frustration. "And the only name I could come up with was Tiffany. You just look like a Tiffany."
Siwon learns that night that Kyuhyun can smile. It's the best thing he's seen since the sun went out.
***
Every night before bed he watches Kyuhyun strip and stretch. His body is long and lean, his skin as white as a ghost and his eyes always hooded with that thick brown hair. He tries not to think about what it feels like, what it'd be like to run his fingers through the silk strands before letting his hands move down his chest and around his waist. He fails miserably.
***
"I want to know how you do that."
Kyuhyun lowers the handgun and turns from his target to face the taller man behind him. The air is chilly this evening from so high up and the haze of ash that coats the skyline sends what little yellow starlight is left to more of a dull purple, shaded with streaks of grey. This world doesn't have a sun anymore, but it does have a star half as bright. Most of the time the sky is too thick with grey flakes and clouds to see it at all, but it is there sometimes - when the moon doesn't insist on hiding it. Kyuhyun eyes him wearily, his dark lashes and charcoal liner accenting the white skin that Siwon imagines must feel like porcelain. The sleek black turtle neck and slacks hug his slender frame in all the right ways and it's hard for him to keep his breathing at a normal pace when the younger boy motions him closer. Siwon wants to kick himself in the face for letting his feelings for the other person grow at such a fast rate. When he reaches the edge of the rooftop, Kyuhyun stands behind him, extending an arm in front of them and placing the gun in his hand. Siwon swallows at the weight of it. It's heavier than he imagined and the steel is cold and hard in his grasp. Kyuhyun places a gloved hand beneath his and pushes up and then back down over the ledge as he finds a target.
"Take it with both hands." Siwon feels a shiver run down his spine at the sound of the other's voice cutting through the silence, so close to his ear that he can feel his breath. His heart stops and he can hardly believe he just spoke five words to him. His voice isn't like he imagined, it's strong and confident but it's also low and almost threatening. Kyuhyun's body presses into his back as he brings his other leather laced hand over Siwon's, hooking his thumb around his and pushing it back to the hammer. "Cock it."
Siwon swallows, bringing back the metal plate and placing his index finger around the trigger, acutely aware of the fact that he's never even touched Kyuhyun before and now he was flush up against his body. He can still feel the other's breath skirt across the shell of his ear and he knows his lips must be a centimeter from his neck, sending goosebumps down his back. He hopes Kyuhyun doesn't notice. Forcing his mind to focus on the alley below, he sees it's littered with trash and vermin, filth and rotting corpses; there are a number of things to shoot at but Kyuhyun keeps moving his aim as if unsure of what to hit first. Siwon risks turning his head just a few inches to get a better look at the face next to his, just barely but not touching. The boy's lips are a pale pink, almost purple at the center, they look so soft that he can't stop himself from wondering what they might taste like, what he might do if he leaned just a little further. His head snaps back forward when he notices the corners of those lips twitch upward.
"What are you?"
"What?"
"You have to have some power. Your body is humming so loud it's practically singing."
Right, of course in this proximity he'd be able to sense that.
"Healer." Siwon finally responds. He feels a little satisfaction when the body behind him tenses. He knows his inheritance is a good one. "What's your name?"
Kyuhyun doesn't respond as he finally stops their movement, assuming a target. "There. See that bird on the post?"
"Can't I just shoot the post?"
Kyuhyun sighs next to him, clearly agitated with being asked such a stupid question.
"Alright, I'm sorry. The innocent bird will die if you want."
"You won't hit it anyway."
Suddenly annoyed with the surety in his voice that he'll definitely fail, Siwon rolls his shoulder and glares at the boy next to him. The brunette doesn't bother looking back, the cocky grin clear as day on his face. "Focus." Siwon does as he's told, bringing the gun back in his field of vision as he does his best to make a straight line between it and the bird. "It's too low." He blinks and tries to re-focus, is sure the gun is where it should be. Any higher and he'd miss it by one inch, maybe two. He pulls the trigger and watches in annoyance as the traitor flies away unharmed, the bullet hole several inches lower to where it sat.
"That's enough of my bullets you've wasted, I think." Kyuhyun roughly pulls the gun from his grasp and takes a step back as he turns to look at him.
"Sorry."
The boy shrugs in response, walks back to the ledge and fires the gun without hesitation, hitting the empty space where the bird sat minutes ago. Siwon rolls his eyes when he cocks the gun a second time and shoots the same exact spot.
"I get it. You're the best."
Kyuhyun looks at him, firing another round into the same spot.
Siwon bites his tongue but smiles despite himself, "How long have you been doing this?"
The boy doesn't answer him as he clips on the safety and tries to squeeze the gun into his already skin tight pants. He turns back to the street below, leaning over the concrete ledge and placing his elbows on either side of him for support. Siwon shifts awkwardly before taking a step forward and joining the younger, his gaze falling back to the street. He doesn't understand why Kyuhyun likes coming up here. The road below is a small wasteland of death and decay, nothing but sickness. He hates it. In this world you need to find all the good you can because if you focus on the bad, it'll swallow you whole. Siwon's eyes hesitantly make their way back to the tall male next to him as if he were a magnet. He's never been this close to him and he only just now notices the faint hint of acne scars in his cheeks, the slope of his nose, and the sharp angle of his jaw. He's been watching him for months but bringing the details into such a sharp focus makes it somehow different. His hair has sort of a dark amber tint to it at the fringe and as it moves with the breeze, Siwon's fingers itch to touch it. Jesus, when did he become such a sap?
"What's your name?" He asks again.
Siwon watches the boy swallow and knit his eyebrows together as if wrestling with a decision. So close, he thinks.
Suddenly, he turns to face him, a faint hint of a smile on his face and his eyes as dark as night as he says the word Siwon's been longing to hear for nearly four months, "Kyuhyun."
PART II
rating: r
pairing: siwon/kyuhyun
genre: fantasy, romance
part: 1/2
word count: 2332
summary: it's a different world now and it sucks.
He's not sure how or when it happened but somewhere between losing everything he's loved and promising to never love anything again, he's stumbled across another liability. It's standing in the kitchen now. Tall, overbearing, annoying, needy, and incredibly naive. Kyuhyun never even said it was okay for him to stay one night, much less the next thirty that followed. He'd taken pity on him the night he found him in his apartment, nearly frozen to death from the coldest winter they'd seen in years. He'd managed not to speak to him, figuring he'd die or disappear soon anyway, but now here he was, eating his food, drinking his beer, and sleeping in his house. Kyuhyun watches him from where he sits at the small wooden table in the dining area. Despite the world descending into a constant state of evening and ash, the man's skin is still tan, his body healthy, and his smile so genuine you'd think this desolate place was a dream. Kyuhyun tries not to watch too often. Anytime he catches his mind wondering from anything other than pity, he stalks up the staircase and opens the rusty tin door to the roof, reminding himself that there's nothing in this place to live or die for and the only way to survive is to remember that.
***
It's about a month before Siwon speaks to him for the first time.
"What's your name?"
Kyuhyun glances up from the bowl of cereal in front of him, his long lashes touching the chocolate bangs that rest just below his thick eyebrows. He doesn't respond and Siwon shifts awkwardly under his gaze.
"Do you have a power?"
Kyuhyun's eyes narrow and Siwon swallows. Okay, obviously, a touchy subject.
"Um, how long have you lived here?"
Still nothing.
"Right. Well, I just want to say thank you. For letting me stay here. I mean, you seem like-" before he can finish, the younger boy across the table rolls his eyes, the metal chair screeching across the wooden floor as he stands and turns his back, walking toward the kitchen.
***
Siwon starts having regular conversations with himself. He likes to think Kyuhyun listens to them, and he'll throw in a question every now and then for good measure, but it always goes unanswered. Siwon does his best to prove himself valuable around the apartment. He cleans what little mess the other makes and even offers his not-so-expertise cooking sometimes (though the younger never takes it). It's sort of like living with a ghost.
He sleeps on the floor opposite of Kyuhyun's bed and figures the other must find him pretty pathetic with no blanket and no pillow. Siwon knows looking a little pathetic is still better than sleeping, or more likely, getting killed on the streets. Kyuhyun strips off his shirt next to the large window adjacent to his floor mattress, the pale moonlight streaming through, and it's the first time he sees the scars that decorate his back like a maze. Prior to this night, he'd only seen silhouttes dance across the room when the world went dark, but now it was one of those rare evenings when the clouds parted and the moon was brighter than any of the starlight the world had left. Siwon lies on the floor across the room, his head resting on his arm as his only support and licks his lips as he watches the younger roll his head from side to side, stretch his arms over his head, and fall in a heap onto the mattress. It's the first time in a long time he doesn't mind the deafening silence.
***
A month goes by and Siwon's learned a lot about the other boy without him having spoken a single word. It's amazing what you can learn from someone just by watching. He learns that Kyuhyun likes to spend at least six to seven hours a day on the rooftop. He learns that when Kyuhyun is on the roof, he shoots at random vermin that run through the allies surronding the building. He learns that Kyuhyun never misses. He learns that Kyuhyun, despite knowing the dangers of the outside world, walks down the empty streets with no worries. At first Siwon thinks this is because he doesn't care if he lives or dies. Then Siwon learns that Kyuhyun doesn't breathe at night when he sleeps. He notices Kyuhyun never takes off the slick leather gloves that cover his fingers, even when he eats. Siwon learns that Kyuhyun avoids physical contact at all costs and eats the same tasteless breakfast every morning. Siwon also learns that he's a slow learner because Kyuhyun's power is obviously Death.
***
Kyuhyun stumbles through the door of their dimly lit apartment in the early hours of what someone might call morning. It's not as if they have a clock to go by or even a sun anymore. The only way Siwon knows it's morning is because during the time they sleep, Kyuhyun will wake up in the darkest hour and leave. He doesn't know where he goes and he doesn't ask, but he does take note of fresh bruises along his face or neck.
"I know what your power is."
Kyuhyun freezes halfway to his bed and turns to look at him on the floor
"You're Death, right?"
He doesn't answer him but from all the things Siwon's learned, he can tell from his expression that it isn't one of denial. He grins, "You know, for someone as quiet and mysterious as you, you're not so difficult to read."
***
Siwon thinks he's becoming obsessed with Kyuhyun. It's not as if he has music or television to entertain him anymore and after nearly three months of nothing but this dank shack and shell of a person to keep him company, he's grown rather fond of watching him. He's even given him a nickname.
"Tiffany, can you pass me the rice?"
Kyuhyun stares at him as he raises a brow.
"What's wrong, Tiffany?"
No response.
"I've been here for almost three months now and you still haven't given me your real name. I just thought you should know I've taken it upon myself to give you one. I thought about it for hours, days even!" Siwon makes an exaggerated sigh of mock frustration. "And the only name I could come up with was Tiffany. You just look like a Tiffany."
Siwon learns that night that Kyuhyun can smile. It's the best thing he's seen since the sun went out.
***
Every night before bed he watches Kyuhyun strip and stretch. His body is long and lean, his skin as white as a ghost and his eyes always hooded with that thick brown hair. He tries not to think about what it feels like, what it'd be like to run his fingers through the silk strands before letting his hands move down his chest and around his waist. He fails miserably.
***
"I want to know how you do that."
Kyuhyun lowers the handgun and turns from his target to face the taller man behind him. The air is chilly this evening from so high up and the haze of ash that coats the skyline sends what little yellow starlight is left to more of a dull purple, shaded with streaks of grey. This world doesn't have a sun anymore, but it does have a star half as bright. Most of the time the sky is too thick with grey flakes and clouds to see it at all, but it is there sometimes - when the moon doesn't insist on hiding it. Kyuhyun eyes him wearily, his dark lashes and charcoal liner accenting the white skin that Siwon imagines must feel like porcelain. The sleek black turtle neck and slacks hug his slender frame in all the right ways and it's hard for him to keep his breathing at a normal pace when the younger boy motions him closer. Siwon wants to kick himself in the face for letting his feelings for the other person grow at such a fast rate. When he reaches the edge of the rooftop, Kyuhyun stands behind him, extending an arm in front of them and placing the gun in his hand. Siwon swallows at the weight of it. It's heavier than he imagined and the steel is cold and hard in his grasp. Kyuhyun places a gloved hand beneath his and pushes up and then back down over the ledge as he finds a target.
"Take it with both hands." Siwon feels a shiver run down his spine at the sound of the other's voice cutting through the silence, so close to his ear that he can feel his breath. His heart stops and he can hardly believe he just spoke five words to him. His voice isn't like he imagined, it's strong and confident but it's also low and almost threatening. Kyuhyun's body presses into his back as he brings his other leather laced hand over Siwon's, hooking his thumb around his and pushing it back to the hammer. "Cock it."
Siwon swallows, bringing back the metal plate and placing his index finger around the trigger, acutely aware of the fact that he's never even touched Kyuhyun before and now he was flush up against his body. He can still feel the other's breath skirt across the shell of his ear and he knows his lips must be a centimeter from his neck, sending goosebumps down his back. He hopes Kyuhyun doesn't notice. Forcing his mind to focus on the alley below, he sees it's littered with trash and vermin, filth and rotting corpses; there are a number of things to shoot at but Kyuhyun keeps moving his aim as if unsure of what to hit first. Siwon risks turning his head just a few inches to get a better look at the face next to his, just barely but not touching. The boy's lips are a pale pink, almost purple at the center, they look so soft that he can't stop himself from wondering what they might taste like, what he might do if he leaned just a little further. His head snaps back forward when he notices the corners of those lips twitch upward.
"What are you?"
"What?"
"You have to have some power. Your body is humming so loud it's practically singing."
Right, of course in this proximity he'd be able to sense that.
"Healer." Siwon finally responds. He feels a little satisfaction when the body behind him tenses. He knows his inheritance is a good one. "What's your name?"
Kyuhyun doesn't respond as he finally stops their movement, assuming a target. "There. See that bird on the post?"
"Can't I just shoot the post?"
Kyuhyun sighs next to him, clearly agitated with being asked such a stupid question.
"Alright, I'm sorry. The innocent bird will die if you want."
"You won't hit it anyway."
Suddenly annoyed with the surety in his voice that he'll definitely fail, Siwon rolls his shoulder and glares at the boy next to him. The brunette doesn't bother looking back, the cocky grin clear as day on his face. "Focus." Siwon does as he's told, bringing the gun back in his field of vision as he does his best to make a straight line between it and the bird. "It's too low." He blinks and tries to re-focus, is sure the gun is where it should be. Any higher and he'd miss it by one inch, maybe two. He pulls the trigger and watches in annoyance as the traitor flies away unharmed, the bullet hole several inches lower to where it sat.
"That's enough of my bullets you've wasted, I think." Kyuhyun roughly pulls the gun from his grasp and takes a step back as he turns to look at him.
"Sorry."
The boy shrugs in response, walks back to the ledge and fires the gun without hesitation, hitting the empty space where the bird sat minutes ago. Siwon rolls his eyes when he cocks the gun a second time and shoots the same exact spot.
"I get it. You're the best."
Kyuhyun looks at him, firing another round into the same spot.
Siwon bites his tongue but smiles despite himself, "How long have you been doing this?"
The boy doesn't answer him as he clips on the safety and tries to squeeze the gun into his already skin tight pants. He turns back to the street below, leaning over the concrete ledge and placing his elbows on either side of him for support. Siwon shifts awkwardly before taking a step forward and joining the younger, his gaze falling back to the street. He doesn't understand why Kyuhyun likes coming up here. The road below is a small wasteland of death and decay, nothing but sickness. He hates it. In this world you need to find all the good you can because if you focus on the bad, it'll swallow you whole. Siwon's eyes hesitantly make their way back to the tall male next to him as if he were a magnet. He's never been this close to him and he only just now notices the faint hint of acne scars in his cheeks, the slope of his nose, and the sharp angle of his jaw. He's been watching him for months but bringing the details into such a sharp focus makes it somehow different. His hair has sort of a dark amber tint to it at the fringe and as it moves with the breeze, Siwon's fingers itch to touch it. Jesus, when did he become such a sap?
"What's your name?" He asks again.
Siwon watches the boy swallow and knit his eyebrows together as if wrestling with a decision. So close, he thinks.
Suddenly, he turns to face him, a faint hint of a smile on his face and his eyes as dark as night as he says the word Siwon's been longing to hear for nearly four months, "Kyuhyun."
PART II