ynwa - fic
You’ll Never Walk Alone
He had failed. That was his one chance to prove that he was better, that he had made the right decision and he hadn’t been able to prove anything. He was supposed to help lead Liverpool to victory over them instead it was they who were defeated, defeated in their own home. He felt heartbroken and yet without pain. There was no pain but then there was no anything. Simply an emptiness and the faint ghost of all the emotions he had left behind when he left Madrid.
He was one of the last ones in the locker room, just sitting there with his head in his hands, half-dressed. This is where Stevie found him after showering. While everyone knew of Fernando’s past with Atlético very few knew the full details. Normally Xabi took it upon himself to help the younger man on these occasions but the Basque was no longer here. That left Stevie and there was no way he was going to let this boy down.
Stevie took a seat on the bench beside Fernando, clasping his hands together in front of him. He rested his forearms on his knees and stared down at his shoes. They sat in silence for a moment until the last of their teammates left. Then it was just the two of them, still as statues in the locker room that smelled like sweat and grass. Stevie didn’t know what to say, couldn’t fathom what words might help the Spaniard in this moment. He could say a million things that were true, he could tell Fernando he had played well but it’s not what he wanted to hear, not what he needed to hear.
The longer he sat there the more he realized there really wasn’t anything to say. He wished he had the power to change the outcome of the game or to have made Fernando fit back when they played Atlético in their home. He was the captain he should be able to do something but the solution seemed too far away, too impossible.
“They still love you and they know how much you gave them.”
It wasn’t much but it was all he could think of to say. He could tell that Fernando doubted the words but he didn’t say anything.
“They know, Nando.”
When Fernando looked up his eyes were brimming with tears he refused to shed. Slowly he stood up and finished changing, pulling a shirt on over his head and stuffing his things into his bag. His actions were robotic, out of habit more than being in the present. He nodded to Stevie once, his eyes blank and emotionless before walking out of the room. With a sigh Stevie followed.
Later that night tight in Stevie’s arms Fernando finally let the tears fall. The pain was all too real and all too fresh for things to be better but he took comfort in Stevie’s presence. And once the pain and anger started to fade he would be glad he had found a place where ‘you’ll never walk alone ‘was so much more than a slogan. It was a way of life.
He had failed. That was his one chance to prove that he was better, that he had made the right decision and he hadn’t been able to prove anything. He was supposed to help lead Liverpool to victory over them instead it was they who were defeated, defeated in their own home. He felt heartbroken and yet without pain. There was no pain but then there was no anything. Simply an emptiness and the faint ghost of all the emotions he had left behind when he left Madrid.
He was one of the last ones in the locker room, just sitting there with his head in his hands, half-dressed. This is where Stevie found him after showering. While everyone knew of Fernando’s past with Atlético very few knew the full details. Normally Xabi took it upon himself to help the younger man on these occasions but the Basque was no longer here. That left Stevie and there was no way he was going to let this boy down.
Stevie took a seat on the bench beside Fernando, clasping his hands together in front of him. He rested his forearms on his knees and stared down at his shoes. They sat in silence for a moment until the last of their teammates left. Then it was just the two of them, still as statues in the locker room that smelled like sweat and grass. Stevie didn’t know what to say, couldn’t fathom what words might help the Spaniard in this moment. He could say a million things that were true, he could tell Fernando he had played well but it’s not what he wanted to hear, not what he needed to hear.
The longer he sat there the more he realized there really wasn’t anything to say. He wished he had the power to change the outcome of the game or to have made Fernando fit back when they played Atlético in their home. He was the captain he should be able to do something but the solution seemed too far away, too impossible.
“They still love you and they know how much you gave them.”
It wasn’t much but it was all he could think of to say. He could tell that Fernando doubted the words but he didn’t say anything.
“They know, Nando.”
When Fernando looked up his eyes were brimming with tears he refused to shed. Slowly he stood up and finished changing, pulling a shirt on over his head and stuffing his things into his bag. His actions were robotic, out of habit more than being in the present. He nodded to Stevie once, his eyes blank and emotionless before walking out of the room. With a sigh Stevie followed.
Later that night tight in Stevie’s arms Fernando finally let the tears fall. The pain was all too real and all too fresh for things to be better but he took comfort in Stevie’s presence. And once the pain and anger started to fade he would be glad he had found a place where ‘you’ll never walk alone ‘was so much more than a slogan. It was a way of life.