How Trek is better than Wars
This was inspired another post on startrek (Check out the redneck post). Something I posted about a year ago.
How Star Wars Would be Different with Star Trek Characters. Maybe SW episodes 1-3 and 6 would have been much better.
1. Kirk (or Riker or Tom Paris) would have slept with Leia in her prison cell, punched out Tarkin and then blown up the Death Star while being transported to the ship at the last moment.
2. If 7 of 9 were rescuing a friend trapped in a frozen metal case, she'd have softened the room with grenades and come in firing, figuring her friend was basically in armor and safe from shrapnel or richochets.
3. If members of Chakotay's away team were denied access to a bar because of bigotry, he'd burn the place down before accepting "We don't serve their kind, here."
4. If Chekov had been in that garbage dump and gotten grabbed by a one-eyd monster, he would have had at least one sympathy-inducing wound when he escaped.
5. R2D2 were a Federation android, we could understand what the hell he was saying!
6. Darth Vader wouldn't have left McCoy's sickbay while still needing life support; Crusher's sickbay with all that scar tissue; Bashir's sickbay until his hair had grown back; the EMH's sickbay until his un-augmented voice was up to operatic standards; Phlox's sickbay until he worked through his many personal issues.
7. If Sisco found a friend on a leash, he'd have stuffed the toad-bowl down the big slug's throat.
8. If Picard found a planet subject to Federation law, but with a booming slave trade, he'd have freed more than one mop-haired kid.
9. If a wrinkled green toad told Spock that the way to enlightenment was to stop thinking, Spock would correct his logic, posture, and grammar.
10. While many Wars fans point out that no Federation ships are powerful enough to blow up a planet, remember that when Kirk met a ship that blew up planets, he blew it up.
11. Naboo: Under control of the Obsidian Order.
12. Anikan would get a long "I'm not angry, just disapointed" speech from Picard after he turned to the dark side.
13. Chewbaca would speak perfect English with the help of the universal translator.
14. Clones have rights too!
15. Lightsabers: now very thin so that Sulu (shirtless) and Darth Vader can fence to the death.
16. Amidala would have no problem starting up a hot affair with Kirk... or Riker... or Tom Paris.
17. If the Klingons had met JarJar Binks, they would have shot first, then asked questions.
18. Mr. Worf would rather fight Chewy rather than let him win the game.
19. Light sabers would be set to "stun."
20. Trip would be annoyed having to answer "garbage masher" questions.
21. Drinks in the cantina would cost 3 strips Gold Pressed Latinum.
22. Janeway would offer Republic technology to the Trade Federation in exchange for safe passage through the blocade.
Live long and giggle
How Star Wars Would be Different with Star Trek Characters. Maybe SW episodes 1-3 and 6 would have been much better.
1. Kirk (or Riker or Tom Paris) would have slept with Leia in her prison cell, punched out Tarkin and then blown up the Death Star while being transported to the ship at the last moment.
2. If 7 of 9 were rescuing a friend trapped in a frozen metal case, she'd have softened the room with grenades and come in firing, figuring her friend was basically in armor and safe from shrapnel or richochets.
3. If members of Chakotay's away team were denied access to a bar because of bigotry, he'd burn the place down before accepting "We don't serve their kind, here."
4. If Chekov had been in that garbage dump and gotten grabbed by a one-eyd monster, he would have had at least one sympathy-inducing wound when he escaped.
5. R2D2 were a Federation android, we could understand what the hell he was saying!
6. Darth Vader wouldn't have left McCoy's sickbay while still needing life support; Crusher's sickbay with all that scar tissue; Bashir's sickbay until his hair had grown back; the EMH's sickbay until his un-augmented voice was up to operatic standards; Phlox's sickbay until he worked through his many personal issues.
7. If Sisco found a friend on a leash, he'd have stuffed the toad-bowl down the big slug's throat.
8. If Picard found a planet subject to Federation law, but with a booming slave trade, he'd have freed more than one mop-haired kid.
9. If a wrinkled green toad told Spock that the way to enlightenment was to stop thinking, Spock would correct his logic, posture, and grammar.
10. While many Wars fans point out that no Federation ships are powerful enough to blow up a planet, remember that when Kirk met a ship that blew up planets, he blew it up.
11. Naboo: Under control of the Obsidian Order.
12. Anikan would get a long "I'm not angry, just disapointed" speech from Picard after he turned to the dark side.
13. Chewbaca would speak perfect English with the help of the universal translator.
14. Clones have rights too!
15. Lightsabers: now very thin so that Sulu (shirtless) and Darth Vader can fence to the death.
16. Amidala would have no problem starting up a hot affair with Kirk... or Riker... or Tom Paris.
17. If the Klingons had met JarJar Binks, they would have shot first, then asked questions.
18. Mr. Worf would rather fight Chewy rather than let him win the game.
19. Light sabers would be set to "stun."
20. Trip would be annoyed having to answer "garbage masher" questions.
21. Drinks in the cantina would cost 3 strips Gold Pressed Latinum.
22. Janeway would offer Republic technology to the Trade Federation in exchange for safe passage through the blocade.
Live long and giggle