Cool, I like dark poems. Just felt like it was missing one more line though.
I fucking hate you, I wish you'd die You're the one that I despise. Left me laying in the dark You're the one who left this mark.
Your face is written in my mind An image, never forgotten or left behind. Torn and tatterd you left me here You lied, your smiles hid the fear.
But when all is said and done The next moment you were gone. You laughed, you smerked, you had your fun That's when I'll be there with a fucking gun.
Heh, sorry if I ruined the effect by adding a cheezy line there. I think that last line needs to be a bit stronger. How about, "Then why aren't you laughing, at the end of my gun."
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I fucking hate you, I wish you'd die
You're the one that I despise.
Left me laying in the dark
You're the one who left this mark.
Your face is written in my mind
An image, never forgotten or left behind.
Torn and tatterd you left me here
You lied, your smiles hid the fear.
But when all is said and done
The next moment you were gone.
You laughed, you smerked, you had your fun
That's when I'll be there with a fucking gun.
Heh, sorry if I ruined the effect by adding a cheezy line there. I think that last line needs to be a bit stronger. How about, "Then why aren't you laughing, at the end of my gun."
Heh
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