Also, to prepare for my court appearance, I engaged in xxxTREME hair and beard cutting. As usual, I cut my hair too short, so that strands from my freakishly low hairline fall out of the ponytail and I have to loop them back over my ears. It's a look that works if you're some kind of bishi pretty-boy, but not on a big lumbering sack of suet like
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The judge was blind.
This is not a joke.
(Or maybe I should say I'm not lying, but it was pretty funny. Except about the going blind part. Actually it wasn't funny at all, since I got busted. By a blind judge. But I had a nice haircut. I give up. I'll be ashamed of this comment in the morning.)
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