Fic: Decisions
Title: Decisions
Recipient: aelora
Prompt: I Heard The Bells On Christmas Day
And in despair, I bow'd my head:
"There is no peace on earth," I said,
"For hate is strong and mocks the song,
Of Peace on earth, good will to men."
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Explicit sex
Summary: Gabriel Gray has a customer with something on his mind.
A/N: Originally written for the heroes_xmas fic exchange. This started out as a sweet and short Christmas story. Really, it did. Somewhere along the way, it turned into an NC-17 epic that happens to take place on Christmas Eve. I’m guessing that most of the people on my flist won’t have an issue with that, though…
“Can I help you?”
The words were just an automatic formality. It had been so quiet all afternoon that it took several seconds for the click of the door latch to really register in his mind; the greeting left his lips before he even looked up at the customer.
A man, darker than him, older than him, flecks of grey through the black hair at his temples. He smiled hesitantly as he said, “I’m very sorry to disturb you at this time. But I saw your sign, and hopefully this will only take a minute…”
Gabriel could tell by the light outside that it was practically closing time. A glance at the clocks confirmed for him, 4:52 pm. Of course, half the street had shut down already, but what else did he have to do today?
He turned the offered wristwatch over and raised his eyebrows. “This is a lovely piece.”
The man said, “Yes. It came from…a friend, who knows quite a lot about them.”
Gabriel looked up at the odd pause and studied the man more closely. Dark eyes were looking back at him just as intently from behind wire-rimmed glasses, until the man suddenly smiled at him and they crinkled appealingly. He quickly turned his attention back to the watch and headed over to his workbench, pulling his glasses on.
The problem was obvious: a tiny broken cog. What was strange was that he couldn’t think of any way that such a break could occur without a lot of additional damage being done to the mechanism. He frowned at the discrepancy, but then shook his head the tiniest bit at himself. Just take care of it, and then go home.
“Would you mind if I watched?”
Gabriel glanced over and again shook his head silently. As he leaned over to reach into a drawer, the man came to stand behind his left shoulder. He deftly replaced the broken part but faltered for a second as a hand rested on the back of his chair, fingers just grazing against his back. He felt weight pull the chair back downwards as the customer leaned forward, his coat brushing Gabriel’s arm.
“I don’t know that I’d have the patience for such delicate work.”
Gabriel smiled slightly.
“So which of the sons are you?”
“Neither,” Gabriel said. “My father was the older of them.”
“I see. Something of a tradition in your family.”
“Yeah. I guess I was destined to end up here. At least, my father insisted I was.”
The customer snorted. “I can sympathize.”
Gabriel replaced the watch’s back and returned it. The man held it and looked at it for several seconds before glancing back at him. “What do I owe you?”
Gabriel hesitated, then shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. It took me five minutes. Besides, it’s Christmas Eve. You know. Peace on earth, goodwill toward men, and all that.”
The customer looks startled. “Surely you don’t do this a lot? Giving things away can’t be good for your bottom line.”
Gabriel shrugged as he put the tools away. He shouldn’t have been surprised: offer to do something nice for someone, and they’re suspicious.
“Well, if you’re not going to let me pay you, at least let me do something nice for you. Let me take you out for dinner.”
It was Gabriel’s turn to be startled. He’d never been hit on quite that blatantly before. He looked intently at the man, wondering if he’d misunderstood - no, he was sure he hadn’t. Then the man smiled, big and genuine, and it was like the sun lighting up the room.
“I, uh...I don’t normally have dinner with strangers,” he managed to say.
“We can take care of that.” The man leaned forward and reached out a hand. “I’m Mohinder.”
He shook it - nice, firm grip, confident without being overwhelming. “Gabriel.”
“I’m sorry, this is presumptuous of me. You’ve probably got plans with family tonight.”
Gabriel laughed mirthlessly. “Midnight mass. That’s all.”
“Look, I’m killing a few hours while waiting for someone. I’d be grateful for the company; it would be much more pleasant than sitting alone with my thoughts. I saw that the place on the corner was open late tonight-”
“Oh, no - you don’t want to eat there.” Gabriel hesitated before saying, “I know a good place - Chinese, if you like that. It’s a bit of a walk, I’m afraid.” He doesn’t add, it’s not far from my apartment.
Mohinder smiled at him yet again. “Exercise is always good. It helps work up an appetite.”
* * * * * * *
Gabriel, who rarely went beyond small talk with people, was surprised at how easily the conversation came. Mohinder became animated, laughing frequently, waving chopsticks for emphasis as he argued a point. The only thing he wouldn’t talk about was his reason for being in New York, or the associate who was meeting him. “I’m not working right now,” he said. “I want to just relax and enjoy myself.”
Gabriel was enjoying himself as well, more than he’d ever expected to. He knew he was being an idiot, but he could barely take his eyes off the man sitting across from him.
When they finally finished, they headed out towards his apartment. Mohinder hadn’t said or done anything suspicious, had barely even touched him, but still, when he’d heard that Gabriel lived nearby, he’d immediately offered to walk over with him, saying it wasn’t that much further out of his way. Gabriel hadn’t been capable of refusing. He hadn’t felt this happy in a long time, couldn’t remember the last time he’d met someone who he clicked with like this.
He stopped in front of his building, and Mohinder cut off in the middle of a sentence. “Here already?” He didn’t sound any happier about it than Gabriel felt.
“I’m very glad you agreed to come out with me. It’s made the evening much more enjoyable than I’d expected.”
Gabriel hunched over a bit, hands in pockets. “You never did explain to me exactly why you’re in town.” He wasn’t sure why, but he was convinced that whatever the reason was, it was important.
Mohinder’s look was pensive. “I’ve been struggling to make a decision,” he said slowly. “I wasn’t sure what to do. But now…I am. You’ve helped me.”
“I haven’t done anything,” Gabriel said, though the words warmed him.
“But you have,” Mohinder said. Then he leaned forward and kissed Gabriel. Lightly, pulling back quickly, but still leaning into Gabriel’s space. So Gabriel slid both hands onto Mohinder’s neck, tilting his head backwards, and kissed him back hard, Mohinder’s tongue curling against his own almost instantly. Mohinder pulled them closer together, wrapping his arms around Gabriel, and after a few seconds Gabriel followed suit, sliding his hands downward. God…he barely knew this man, but yet he suddenly wished he could do so much more than this. He didn’t care that he was standing here kissing another man where the whole neighborhood could see, he just wanted…
He broke it off and Mohinder let out a barely audible sigh. He touched Mohinder’s neck again as he whispered, “Do you want to come inside?”
Mohinder’s eyes widened in surprise and Gabriel wondered why-what was he here for, if not an invitation? For a few agonizing seconds he looked away, and when his eyes came back they looked almost teary. But then he smiled and murmured back against Gabriel’s chin, “Yes. Oh, God, yes.”
Gabriel kissed him again as he fumbled in his coat pocket for the keys. For a second, over Mohinder’s shoulder, he glimpsed a dark figure at the end of the block. But then they were stumbling up the steps and down the hallway.
He latched the door behind them and looked self-consciously around his apartment. He’d brought a few men back here before, and a few women too, and he knew exactly what they’d thought about the décor. But Mohinder barely even glanced around, dropping his coat on a chair and pulling Gabriel into another kiss before he had his own jacket off.
Mohinder almost seemed to know the way to the bedroom. He pushed Gabriel back against the edge of the bed until Gabriel was on the verge of losing his balance and had to sit. Then Mohinder pulled his own shirt up and over his head, not bothering to unbutton it. Gabriel followed the movement, his long fingers sliding softly up Mohinder’s sides and chest.
Mohinder tilted Gabriel’s chin upwards and regarded him, running fingertips through his hair, almost like he was rearranging it. Gabriel dropped his hands to Mohinder’s zipper and in seconds had him exposed. He ran a finger up the underside of Mohinder’s cock and the man tiled his head back, sighing. Gabriel leaned forward and, without warning, slid his mouth over it.
Mohinder gasped, and he closed his eyes, enjoyed the feeling of skin sliding between his lips. When he looked up again, Mohinder was staring down at him, eyes and mouth wide open. Gabriel held his gaze as he licked and sucked and touched and drank in the little sounds Mohinder made in response to everything he did.
Suddenly Mohinder cupped his cheek and said unevenly, “Stop”.
Gabriel pulled back, disappointment flashing through him. “What is it?”
“I don’t want to come yet,” Mohinder whispered.
Gabriel smiled as hands tugged his sweater and shirt over his head. He moved back on the bed and raised his hips to make it easier for Mohinder to pull his pants off, fingertips dragging down his legs. Gabriel shivered. This was too slow for him - he wanted to be pressed up against Mohinder, inside him, wanted to hear him moaning his name. But God, Mohinder was beautiful as he slid his own jeans the rest of the way off and slowly crawled onto the bed, so if slow was what Mohinder wanted, then slow was what he’d get.
He closed his eyes as Mohinder lowered parted lips onto his. One of Mohinder’s legs was between his, and Mohinder’s hands were…they were everywhere, touching and scraping and caressing, seeming to already know exactly how he liked it. He dug his own nails in as Mohinder rubbed himself against his hip and thought, I could come from this alone.
When Mohinder finally took him from behind, he expected it to be fast and harsh, like with everyone else. But Mohinder did it with long, measured strokes while his hands kept moving, up Gabriel’s sides with a ghostly lightness, while he leaned forward and kissed and nipped at the skin between Gabriel’s shoulder blades. It hit him that this must be what making love was like, and he shivered. He put his head down on one arm and reached back with his left hand, just able to touch Mohinder’s cock where it moved in and out of him, to feel the slickness and the bottom of the condom, imagining what it must look like.
Mohinder laid all his weight against Gabriel’s back and wrapped an arm around his chest. He stroked fingertips down Gabriel’s erection, not jerking him off, just playing with him, moving through the wetness on the tip, across to his wrist, down to his balls. He pushed his hips back against Mohinder’s thrusts and realized he was moaning things, too incoherent to understand, but God was in there, along with please and yes and of course Mohinder, Mohinder, like nothing else mattered, like his whole life he’d just been holding his breath waiting for this to happen to him. Then he heard Mohinder order, “Come for me, Gabriel,” and he slid over the edge.
Mohinder held him through it but never quite let up that steady rhythm, in and out of him. When he was finally breathing halfway normally again, Mohinder threaded their fingers together and kissed his shoulder again.
“Are you ready?” Mohinder murmured, and he nodded as best he could.
Mohinder shifted and Gabriel suppressed a moan, thinking that if Mohinder had done that earlier, he would never have lasted as long as he did. Mohinder sped up, really fucking him now, and it felt as good as the gentleness did earlier. He drew in a deep jerky breath and moaned something against Gabriel’s back. Gabriel couldn’t quite make out what it was - something sibilant - but it didn’t matter, because he could feel Mohinder come, every little jerk and movement, and he tried to shut his mind off so that he could just take it all in.
After Mohinder stopped trembling, he pulled out carefully and leaned over to drop the rubber in the trash can near the bed. Gabriel reached for him before he was even finished, snaking arms around him to hold him close. Mohinder looked down at him, eyes suddenly round and sad. “I shouldn’t have done this,” he said.
“Why not?”
All expression dropped from Mohinder’s face. “Because I liked it too much,” he whispered, before pressing his forehead into Gabriel’s shoulder.
Part of Gabriel whispered He probably gives that line to everyone, but part of him exulted, especially when Mohinder raised his head and kissed him again, slow and deep.
Finally Mohinder smiled, looking more like himself. “Come on,” he said, pulling away from Gabriel.
“Where?”
“The shower,” said Mohinder. “I can’t very well send you off to church looking like this.”
When they got there, though, Mohinder was less interested in cleaning up than in touching him again, warm slick muscles sliding against Gabriel’s front as the hot water needled his back. Gabriel smiled to himself; he was pretty sure that if having sex with another man was a sin, doing so on the eve of Our Savior’s birthday was even worse. But he didn’t feel any guilt or shame. Not when it felt so right, like Mohinder had reached into him and adjusted something that was out of sync.
He wondered if Mohinder expected to always top, or if… He almost shoved Mohinder back against the tiled wall and ran a hand down his throat and chest. “You got to have your fun,” he whispered against the shorter man’s mouth. “Now I get to have mine.”
Mohinder’s answering grin was positively wicked. It was thrilling.
“How do you like it?” Gabriel asked.
“Hard,” Mohinder answered, staring into his eyes. “With you moaning my name.”
Gabriel slid an arm around Mohinder’s back as he bent to kiss him again.
* * * * * * *
Mohinder’s hair was still damp and he shivered a bit as he leaned against the signpost. It was only a couple of minutes before Peter out. Mohinder fell into step beside him. “Did it go all right?” he asked quietly.
Peter nodded. “He’ll wake up in a half-hour or so, and he’ll think he came straight home from work and took a long nap.”
They walked in silence for a half-block or so before Peter cleared his throat and said, “You know, I agreed with your argument for why it was worthwhile to see what he used to be like, but I didn’t realize you two…”
Mohinder reddened. Peter went on, “At least now I understand why you’re so willing to buy his story.”
“Peter…” He didn’t bother explaining himself; Peter could pull the full story from his memories faster and more accurately than he could ever tell it. After a few steps, though, he said, “Have you ever met someone who just made you happy? Happier than you’d ever been before? And then, long after you thought you’d lost them forever, you found them again?”
Peter doesn’t answer.
“How much longer do we have to walk?” Mohinder snapped.
“Till you admit to yourself that you can’t turn Sylar back into that man.”
Mohinder stopped and looked up at the sky. “Peter, don’t you ever get tired of hating?”
“This is Sylar we’re talking about,” Peter said. “He hates us, and he’s made sure we all hate him.”
“But don’t you ever get tired of it being that way?”
Peter studied his face. “You really think he’s changed, don’t you?”
A long silence. “When I first met him, he was pretending to be someone else. He was...he was almost exactly like that. I thought it was all a lie. But when he turned up on my doorstep last week, that’s how he was again. I thought he was just trying the same tired trick on me, but I can’t find any cracks in the act. And after seeing him here…” Mohinder shook his head. “I don’t think it’s an act. I don’t know what’s happened to him, but I think he wants to change. I think he really regrets what he's become.”
“So, what? We should just forgive and forget? That whole murdering act got old for him, so we should wipe the slate clean?”
“It’s Christmas Eve, Peter. Everyone keeps talking about ‘peace on earth’ and ‘goodwill towards men’. Maybe we’re being offered a chance to finally achieve the former without any loss…but we’ll have to show some of the latter first.” Peter just kept watching him.
Mohinder looked back down the street. “Are you sure you erased his entire memory?”
“I know what I’m doing,” Peter said irritably. Mohinder knew there was an unspoken question there: Do you?
“It’s just that…the first time I met him, he stared at me. So intently. Almost like he remembered me.”
“That was over nine years ago. And you still remember it, clear as day?” Peter smiled for the first time. “You do love him, don’t you?” Mohinder closed his eyes.
“I don’t trust him,” Peter continued.
“I don’t entirely, either.”
“Don’t have to trust someone to be in love with them.”
Mohinder said quickly, “If we can get him on our side, with everything he’s able to do-”
Peter laughed. “Don’t you ever get tired of trying to save the world?” He put a hand on Mohinder’s shoulder. “You’re a good person, Mohinder. I’ve never seen you do anything to hurt anyone for a selfish reason. You wouldn’t be pushing for this if you didn’t really believe he’d changed.” His face went serious. “And yeah. I get tired of it all sometimes, too. Maybe you’re right. Maybe it would be better to give him the chance to make up for everything he’s done instead of just wishing he were dead.”
Mohinder looked back again. He murmured, “Peter...I do love him.”
Peter squeezed his shoulder. “Can’t change the past. All we can do is go back and make the future.”
Mohinder nodded. "Let's go."
There's now a sequel (prequel?) to this fic called The First Time.
Recipient: aelora
Prompt: I Heard The Bells On Christmas Day
And in despair, I bow'd my head:
"There is no peace on earth," I said,
"For hate is strong and mocks the song,
Of Peace on earth, good will to men."
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Explicit sex
Summary: Gabriel Gray has a customer with something on his mind.
A/N: Originally written for the heroes_xmas fic exchange. This started out as a sweet and short Christmas story. Really, it did. Somewhere along the way, it turned into an NC-17 epic that happens to take place on Christmas Eve. I’m guessing that most of the people on my flist won’t have an issue with that, though…
“Can I help you?”
The words were just an automatic formality. It had been so quiet all afternoon that it took several seconds for the click of the door latch to really register in his mind; the greeting left his lips before he even looked up at the customer.
A man, darker than him, older than him, flecks of grey through the black hair at his temples. He smiled hesitantly as he said, “I’m very sorry to disturb you at this time. But I saw your sign, and hopefully this will only take a minute…”
Gabriel could tell by the light outside that it was practically closing time. A glance at the clocks confirmed for him, 4:52 pm. Of course, half the street had shut down already, but what else did he have to do today?
He turned the offered wristwatch over and raised his eyebrows. “This is a lovely piece.”
The man said, “Yes. It came from…a friend, who knows quite a lot about them.”
Gabriel looked up at the odd pause and studied the man more closely. Dark eyes were looking back at him just as intently from behind wire-rimmed glasses, until the man suddenly smiled at him and they crinkled appealingly. He quickly turned his attention back to the watch and headed over to his workbench, pulling his glasses on.
The problem was obvious: a tiny broken cog. What was strange was that he couldn’t think of any way that such a break could occur without a lot of additional damage being done to the mechanism. He frowned at the discrepancy, but then shook his head the tiniest bit at himself. Just take care of it, and then go home.
“Would you mind if I watched?”
Gabriel glanced over and again shook his head silently. As he leaned over to reach into a drawer, the man came to stand behind his left shoulder. He deftly replaced the broken part but faltered for a second as a hand rested on the back of his chair, fingers just grazing against his back. He felt weight pull the chair back downwards as the customer leaned forward, his coat brushing Gabriel’s arm.
“I don’t know that I’d have the patience for such delicate work.”
Gabriel smiled slightly.
“So which of the sons are you?”
“Neither,” Gabriel said. “My father was the older of them.”
“I see. Something of a tradition in your family.”
“Yeah. I guess I was destined to end up here. At least, my father insisted I was.”
The customer snorted. “I can sympathize.”
Gabriel replaced the watch’s back and returned it. The man held it and looked at it for several seconds before glancing back at him. “What do I owe you?”
Gabriel hesitated, then shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. It took me five minutes. Besides, it’s Christmas Eve. You know. Peace on earth, goodwill toward men, and all that.”
The customer looks startled. “Surely you don’t do this a lot? Giving things away can’t be good for your bottom line.”
Gabriel shrugged as he put the tools away. He shouldn’t have been surprised: offer to do something nice for someone, and they’re suspicious.
“Well, if you’re not going to let me pay you, at least let me do something nice for you. Let me take you out for dinner.”
It was Gabriel’s turn to be startled. He’d never been hit on quite that blatantly before. He looked intently at the man, wondering if he’d misunderstood - no, he was sure he hadn’t. Then the man smiled, big and genuine, and it was like the sun lighting up the room.
“I, uh...I don’t normally have dinner with strangers,” he managed to say.
“We can take care of that.” The man leaned forward and reached out a hand. “I’m Mohinder.”
He shook it - nice, firm grip, confident without being overwhelming. “Gabriel.”
“I’m sorry, this is presumptuous of me. You’ve probably got plans with family tonight.”
Gabriel laughed mirthlessly. “Midnight mass. That’s all.”
“Look, I’m killing a few hours while waiting for someone. I’d be grateful for the company; it would be much more pleasant than sitting alone with my thoughts. I saw that the place on the corner was open late tonight-”
“Oh, no - you don’t want to eat there.” Gabriel hesitated before saying, “I know a good place - Chinese, if you like that. It’s a bit of a walk, I’m afraid.” He doesn’t add, it’s not far from my apartment.
Mohinder smiled at him yet again. “Exercise is always good. It helps work up an appetite.”
* * * * * * *
Gabriel, who rarely went beyond small talk with people, was surprised at how easily the conversation came. Mohinder became animated, laughing frequently, waving chopsticks for emphasis as he argued a point. The only thing he wouldn’t talk about was his reason for being in New York, or the associate who was meeting him. “I’m not working right now,” he said. “I want to just relax and enjoy myself.”
Gabriel was enjoying himself as well, more than he’d ever expected to. He knew he was being an idiot, but he could barely take his eyes off the man sitting across from him.
When they finally finished, they headed out towards his apartment. Mohinder hadn’t said or done anything suspicious, had barely even touched him, but still, when he’d heard that Gabriel lived nearby, he’d immediately offered to walk over with him, saying it wasn’t that much further out of his way. Gabriel hadn’t been capable of refusing. He hadn’t felt this happy in a long time, couldn’t remember the last time he’d met someone who he clicked with like this.
He stopped in front of his building, and Mohinder cut off in the middle of a sentence. “Here already?” He didn’t sound any happier about it than Gabriel felt.
“I’m very glad you agreed to come out with me. It’s made the evening much more enjoyable than I’d expected.”
Gabriel hunched over a bit, hands in pockets. “You never did explain to me exactly why you’re in town.” He wasn’t sure why, but he was convinced that whatever the reason was, it was important.
Mohinder’s look was pensive. “I’ve been struggling to make a decision,” he said slowly. “I wasn’t sure what to do. But now…I am. You’ve helped me.”
“I haven’t done anything,” Gabriel said, though the words warmed him.
“But you have,” Mohinder said. Then he leaned forward and kissed Gabriel. Lightly, pulling back quickly, but still leaning into Gabriel’s space. So Gabriel slid both hands onto Mohinder’s neck, tilting his head backwards, and kissed him back hard, Mohinder’s tongue curling against his own almost instantly. Mohinder pulled them closer together, wrapping his arms around Gabriel, and after a few seconds Gabriel followed suit, sliding his hands downward. God…he barely knew this man, but yet he suddenly wished he could do so much more than this. He didn’t care that he was standing here kissing another man where the whole neighborhood could see, he just wanted…
He broke it off and Mohinder let out a barely audible sigh. He touched Mohinder’s neck again as he whispered, “Do you want to come inside?”
Mohinder’s eyes widened in surprise and Gabriel wondered why-what was he here for, if not an invitation? For a few agonizing seconds he looked away, and when his eyes came back they looked almost teary. But then he smiled and murmured back against Gabriel’s chin, “Yes. Oh, God, yes.”
Gabriel kissed him again as he fumbled in his coat pocket for the keys. For a second, over Mohinder’s shoulder, he glimpsed a dark figure at the end of the block. But then they were stumbling up the steps and down the hallway.
He latched the door behind them and looked self-consciously around his apartment. He’d brought a few men back here before, and a few women too, and he knew exactly what they’d thought about the décor. But Mohinder barely even glanced around, dropping his coat on a chair and pulling Gabriel into another kiss before he had his own jacket off.
Mohinder almost seemed to know the way to the bedroom. He pushed Gabriel back against the edge of the bed until Gabriel was on the verge of losing his balance and had to sit. Then Mohinder pulled his own shirt up and over his head, not bothering to unbutton it. Gabriel followed the movement, his long fingers sliding softly up Mohinder’s sides and chest.
Mohinder tilted Gabriel’s chin upwards and regarded him, running fingertips through his hair, almost like he was rearranging it. Gabriel dropped his hands to Mohinder’s zipper and in seconds had him exposed. He ran a finger up the underside of Mohinder’s cock and the man tiled his head back, sighing. Gabriel leaned forward and, without warning, slid his mouth over it.
Mohinder gasped, and he closed his eyes, enjoyed the feeling of skin sliding between his lips. When he looked up again, Mohinder was staring down at him, eyes and mouth wide open. Gabriel held his gaze as he licked and sucked and touched and drank in the little sounds Mohinder made in response to everything he did.
Suddenly Mohinder cupped his cheek and said unevenly, “Stop”.
Gabriel pulled back, disappointment flashing through him. “What is it?”
“I don’t want to come yet,” Mohinder whispered.
Gabriel smiled as hands tugged his sweater and shirt over his head. He moved back on the bed and raised his hips to make it easier for Mohinder to pull his pants off, fingertips dragging down his legs. Gabriel shivered. This was too slow for him - he wanted to be pressed up against Mohinder, inside him, wanted to hear him moaning his name. But God, Mohinder was beautiful as he slid his own jeans the rest of the way off and slowly crawled onto the bed, so if slow was what Mohinder wanted, then slow was what he’d get.
He closed his eyes as Mohinder lowered parted lips onto his. One of Mohinder’s legs was between his, and Mohinder’s hands were…they were everywhere, touching and scraping and caressing, seeming to already know exactly how he liked it. He dug his own nails in as Mohinder rubbed himself against his hip and thought, I could come from this alone.
When Mohinder finally took him from behind, he expected it to be fast and harsh, like with everyone else. But Mohinder did it with long, measured strokes while his hands kept moving, up Gabriel’s sides with a ghostly lightness, while he leaned forward and kissed and nipped at the skin between Gabriel’s shoulder blades. It hit him that this must be what making love was like, and he shivered. He put his head down on one arm and reached back with his left hand, just able to touch Mohinder’s cock where it moved in and out of him, to feel the slickness and the bottom of the condom, imagining what it must look like.
Mohinder laid all his weight against Gabriel’s back and wrapped an arm around his chest. He stroked fingertips down Gabriel’s erection, not jerking him off, just playing with him, moving through the wetness on the tip, across to his wrist, down to his balls. He pushed his hips back against Mohinder’s thrusts and realized he was moaning things, too incoherent to understand, but God was in there, along with please and yes and of course Mohinder, Mohinder, like nothing else mattered, like his whole life he’d just been holding his breath waiting for this to happen to him. Then he heard Mohinder order, “Come for me, Gabriel,” and he slid over the edge.
Mohinder held him through it but never quite let up that steady rhythm, in and out of him. When he was finally breathing halfway normally again, Mohinder threaded their fingers together and kissed his shoulder again.
“Are you ready?” Mohinder murmured, and he nodded as best he could.
Mohinder shifted and Gabriel suppressed a moan, thinking that if Mohinder had done that earlier, he would never have lasted as long as he did. Mohinder sped up, really fucking him now, and it felt as good as the gentleness did earlier. He drew in a deep jerky breath and moaned something against Gabriel’s back. Gabriel couldn’t quite make out what it was - something sibilant - but it didn’t matter, because he could feel Mohinder come, every little jerk and movement, and he tried to shut his mind off so that he could just take it all in.
After Mohinder stopped trembling, he pulled out carefully and leaned over to drop the rubber in the trash can near the bed. Gabriel reached for him before he was even finished, snaking arms around him to hold him close. Mohinder looked down at him, eyes suddenly round and sad. “I shouldn’t have done this,” he said.
“Why not?”
All expression dropped from Mohinder’s face. “Because I liked it too much,” he whispered, before pressing his forehead into Gabriel’s shoulder.
Part of Gabriel whispered He probably gives that line to everyone, but part of him exulted, especially when Mohinder raised his head and kissed him again, slow and deep.
Finally Mohinder smiled, looking more like himself. “Come on,” he said, pulling away from Gabriel.
“Where?”
“The shower,” said Mohinder. “I can’t very well send you off to church looking like this.”
When they got there, though, Mohinder was less interested in cleaning up than in touching him again, warm slick muscles sliding against Gabriel’s front as the hot water needled his back. Gabriel smiled to himself; he was pretty sure that if having sex with another man was a sin, doing so on the eve of Our Savior’s birthday was even worse. But he didn’t feel any guilt or shame. Not when it felt so right, like Mohinder had reached into him and adjusted something that was out of sync.
He wondered if Mohinder expected to always top, or if… He almost shoved Mohinder back against the tiled wall and ran a hand down his throat and chest. “You got to have your fun,” he whispered against the shorter man’s mouth. “Now I get to have mine.”
Mohinder’s answering grin was positively wicked. It was thrilling.
“How do you like it?” Gabriel asked.
“Hard,” Mohinder answered, staring into his eyes. “With you moaning my name.”
Gabriel slid an arm around Mohinder’s back as he bent to kiss him again.
* * * * * * *
Mohinder’s hair was still damp and he shivered a bit as he leaned against the signpost. It was only a couple of minutes before Peter out. Mohinder fell into step beside him. “Did it go all right?” he asked quietly.
Peter nodded. “He’ll wake up in a half-hour or so, and he’ll think he came straight home from work and took a long nap.”
They walked in silence for a half-block or so before Peter cleared his throat and said, “You know, I agreed with your argument for why it was worthwhile to see what he used to be like, but I didn’t realize you two…”
Mohinder reddened. Peter went on, “At least now I understand why you’re so willing to buy his story.”
“Peter…” He didn’t bother explaining himself; Peter could pull the full story from his memories faster and more accurately than he could ever tell it. After a few steps, though, he said, “Have you ever met someone who just made you happy? Happier than you’d ever been before? And then, long after you thought you’d lost them forever, you found them again?”
Peter doesn’t answer.
“How much longer do we have to walk?” Mohinder snapped.
“Till you admit to yourself that you can’t turn Sylar back into that man.”
Mohinder stopped and looked up at the sky. “Peter, don’t you ever get tired of hating?”
“This is Sylar we’re talking about,” Peter said. “He hates us, and he’s made sure we all hate him.”
“But don’t you ever get tired of it being that way?”
Peter studied his face. “You really think he’s changed, don’t you?”
A long silence. “When I first met him, he was pretending to be someone else. He was...he was almost exactly like that. I thought it was all a lie. But when he turned up on my doorstep last week, that’s how he was again. I thought he was just trying the same tired trick on me, but I can’t find any cracks in the act. And after seeing him here…” Mohinder shook his head. “I don’t think it’s an act. I don’t know what’s happened to him, but I think he wants to change. I think he really regrets what he's become.”
“So, what? We should just forgive and forget? That whole murdering act got old for him, so we should wipe the slate clean?”
“It’s Christmas Eve, Peter. Everyone keeps talking about ‘peace on earth’ and ‘goodwill towards men’. Maybe we’re being offered a chance to finally achieve the former without any loss…but we’ll have to show some of the latter first.” Peter just kept watching him.
Mohinder looked back down the street. “Are you sure you erased his entire memory?”
“I know what I’m doing,” Peter said irritably. Mohinder knew there was an unspoken question there: Do you?
“It’s just that…the first time I met him, he stared at me. So intently. Almost like he remembered me.”
“That was over nine years ago. And you still remember it, clear as day?” Peter smiled for the first time. “You do love him, don’t you?” Mohinder closed his eyes.
“I don’t trust him,” Peter continued.
“I don’t entirely, either.”
“Don’t have to trust someone to be in love with them.”
Mohinder said quickly, “If we can get him on our side, with everything he’s able to do-”
Peter laughed. “Don’t you ever get tired of trying to save the world?” He put a hand on Mohinder’s shoulder. “You’re a good person, Mohinder. I’ve never seen you do anything to hurt anyone for a selfish reason. You wouldn’t be pushing for this if you didn’t really believe he’d changed.” His face went serious. “And yeah. I get tired of it all sometimes, too. Maybe you’re right. Maybe it would be better to give him the chance to make up for everything he’s done instead of just wishing he were dead.”
Mohinder looked back again. He murmured, “Peter...I do love him.”
Peter squeezed his shoulder. “Can’t change the past. All we can do is go back and make the future.”
Mohinder nodded. "Let's go."
There's now a sequel (prequel?) to this fic called The First Time.