Springfic: "Good Intentions" for lazy_neutrino

[springmod]

Title: Good Intentions
Author: Turningleft
Recipient: lazy_neutrino
Character(s): Neville Longbottom, Millicent Bulstrode, Luna Lovegood, Ron Weasley
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: ~1,550
Warnings (highlight to view): None
Summary: "Perhaps they're concocting a nefarious plot," offers Luna. In which Luna and Neville have the best of - but very misguided - intentions, and

Comments

[vegablack62]

This was fun and entertaining. Very fun having Neville being over run by Luna's exuberance. I do think Neville would be horrified by taking something from another person's bag but would be unable to stop Luna. You did a great job with Millicent. I love her reaction to their theft. This line was priceless: "It's the Room of Requirement," Millicent says slowly, as though speaking to children. "All I had to do was require seeing the two of you, and here I am." She stares at them for a moment more and then says, "You are two of the weirdest people I've ever met. It's not poison, it's alcohol, you idiots. Muggle alcohol - got it from a girl in my town over summer holidays."

[lazy_neutrino]

I am just off to bed but I wanted you to know that I have seen this and will be back to gloat over my gift tomorrow... I shall look forward to it all day while I am at work!

[lazy_neutrino]

Ooh, this is fantastic. I love your clever characterisation - lots of showing not telling here, especially when we view Luna through Neville's eyes. Luna's lines are perfect - 'Perhaps we don't know what we need' for example, and as for slightly drunk Luna - I've never seen it done before and I shall judge future versions by this one. She seemed so right.

The characterisation of the incidental characters was good - Ron was Ron and even Snape's glowering fury had its own personality. I thought you nailed Neville here:

he can practically feel her gaze drilling into the back of his head. He knows, without a doubt, that Millicent knows it was him. Luna. Them. He isn't quite sure how she could know, but somehow, he knows that she does. Yes. Poor old Neville. Too decent to be true. I wonder that his guilt didn't show on his face (but then, of course, Millicent couldn't see his face

Good Intentions

[catsintheattic]

I liked the way you told this story, how you showed us the prejudices of Neville and Luna while at the same time taking their concern about Harry seriously. Milicent's reaction was really cool. I always think how hard it must be for the children sorted into Slytherin: they must form such a tightly knit group because no one from the other three Houses wants them around.

[virginia_bell]

Oh, I really liked this! The ending made me smile, and I thought it was a nice little reversal of roles for Millicent to be the one in possession of a Muggle object and for Luna and Neville to have ultimately unfounded suspicions. Well done!

[secretsolitaire]

This was fun!