Is It Possible This LiveJournal Post Will Be Hella Long?
Hey, you guys! Remember that time I was in DeathPlay? It was the first play I'd been in since college, and I had an awesome time, and I've kinda been wanting to write about it so I don't forget how awesome a time it was. But there's so much! So many good memories! I don't even know where to begin.
ROOOOAAAAWWWWWRRRR!!!
What are you doing here, Gerald?
Remember that time you were in DeathPlay? Wasn't it awesome?
Yes, I just said that.
What was auditioning like?
Oh, I see what you're doing. Fine, I'll play your little game. Did you at least eat this time?
I make no promises.
When I get to the part about the cast dinner at Buca di Beppo, you'd better behave.
Dude-
SPOILER WARNING.
So I know you auditioned in December. How was that?
Well, I already knew that Thunderbird auditions were fun, and this was no exception. Although my scene partners, as I said, were not exactly tip-top. We did one exercise where we just went through the alphabet letter-by-letter but in-character (I did a terrible French accent), and the girl kept screwing up. As in, she skipped letters. Because she didn't know the alphabet. I don't know.
One of the best parts was reading excerpts from Craigslist ads as if they were a conversation in a bar. So I really wanted someone to just sit in my lap, and she had some other bizarre kinky fetish she wanted fulfilled.
Uh, did you actually do any scenes from the play?
Oh, yeah, we did that too! In some of those scenes, I thought my co-stars did okay.
Hey, I'll bet you were just reminded of something you forgot to tell me.
You're right! Because Sang, the writer, was excited and pleased to see me! He had seen me as Innocent Victim, I think.
Well, you must have done something right at the audition since they cast you.
I was cast as Lockstock, a role I hadn't even read for! I had read a scene with Drudge, the other union stagehand, but I had no idea what Lockstock was like. I was the very last person Bryce, the director, called, which made me think it was the smallest part in the play, but whatever, I knew I'd have fun. Since I was the last person, he could tell me who else was cast, and I recognized a few names from previous shows.
Did you get a script?
Eventually! It was still being finalized. We got it a few days before the readthrough on January 24, and I read it at work.
What'd you think?
Er.
Uh-oh.
It wasn't quite what I expected. Officially, it was a "full-length sketch" rather than a play, so it was sort of a collection of absurdist, surreal scenes connected by the semblance of a plot. It was funny in parts, but I wasn't sure I really...got it. Most of the funny jokes to me were the meta jokes about theatre, and I was afraid that would limit the audience. Also, it was surprisingly vulgar. I didn't know Sang, but I guessed it was his Thing. One of them, at least. Also: Star Wars references. There were a lot.
What about your part?
You mean parts! I had three roles!
Awesome!
Well, one role was Horse's Head, who just has one line in the first scene.
Oh.
But the other role was Carlyle, who was a stuffed cat.
What?
In the Land of Misfit Supporting Characters.
What?
Beyond the Fourth Wall.
What?
It'll make sense eventually.
I doubt that.
Anyway, I was sort of disappointed by my part(s). I didn't seem to be onstage very much, and I hardly got any funny lines! Instead, Drudge got the jokes, and he even got more lines when he was a puppet.
That sucks!
Oh, don't worry. My initial impressions were wrong. Our characters were stagehands, so we basically came in at the beginning and end of every scene to change the scene and comment on the action without actually taking part in the plot of the play. We were like walking meta jokes. And as for my other roles, I got to wear a fucking wire horse's head and come up with a hilarious cat voice. No, Gerald, I was wrong. You can't judge a show by just reading the script. It's only when you perform it that you see what it really is.
That is so profound. Now shut up and get on with the story.
The readthrough was traditionally at Tommy's Joynt in San Francisco. It was my Thunderbird initiation! Most of the cast was there as well as some of the crew. Plus significant others. Amusingly, Chris (Merci, the mime) brought a date. Tavis (Doc, the character actor) wasn't there, so Dan read for him, and we joked that he was pretty good and we were going to replace Tavis. The readthrough went well, a highlight being Shay's (Punch, the clown) Italian-esque accent for his character, which was perfect. In rehearsals, we played with dropping it when he wasn't "in-character," but in the end, it worked best to have him talk like that the whole time.
Did you offer anyone a ride home?
It's like you know the important parts of this tale before I tell them...
I watch a lot of Psych. It's made me kind of psychic.
Shawn's not really psychic. You know that, right?
...WHAT?!
Moving on.
Jaime Lee (Mouche, the supporting character) lived in Berkeley, and Dan had no problem with my taking her home. She, like me, was new to the Thunderbirds, but more than that, she was new to San Francisco. I don't remember what we talked about on the way, but it was a good bonding experience.
And she forgot her headband in my car so I brought it to rehearsal.
That is totally the beginning of a romantic comedy.
But she moved out here for her boyfriend, so it's not like that. Everyone had a boyfriend! Or a girlfriend! Or a friend. Hell, Randy (Drudge, the stagehand) and Annie (Fantomas, the balloon) were dating each other. I was the only single person in the cast. Except for Chris. Who was gay.
HMM.
No.
He did bring a date to the readthrough. Yeah, you're out of luck.
That's okay. I didn't get into theatre to meet women.
Yes you did.
Not just to meet women.
At least you're being honest. Anyway, what was the rehearsal process like?
Well, first of all, we rehearsed in the basement of a cigarette store.
Really?
Really.
Classy.
This is independent theatre, baby. We can't afford class.
Even better, next door was a woman who banged on the wall and yelled when we were loud or pumped up some Arabian techno, which made our work a bit challenging. But fun and entertaining.
Did you dive right into the show?
No, the first couple rehearsals were a lot of cast bonding and improv work. We declared our favorite animal, food, and color to a partner, and in the future, we would be called upon to tell the rest of the cast what our partner's favorites were. And then later, we would have to know the favorites of people who weren't our partner. It was a fun way to get to know each other.
We also acted out each other's wacky dreams. Among other warm-ups, mental and physical. It was fun.
But THEN you actually...rehearsed, right?
Yeah! Or I watched other people rehearse. Since I wasn't in the show very much. But watching rehearsal was immensely entertaining too since the Thunderbirds are funny folk, in addition to being good actors! There was one scene between Matt (Harold, the improv actor) and Sarose (Bina, the stage manager) that Bryce made them do over and over again, and it kept getting better and better. Directing! Acting! Bryce wanted everyone to come up with backstories for their characters, to know what our characters were doing when they were not onstage. Even lowly Lockstock. It was weird, but I think it was the first time a director had ever really told me to focus on character before. And I was in fucking Wit. It's such a basic part of acting, but I don't think I'd done it. I'd said the words and had fake emotions, but I hadn't really thought about my character and who he was, really. That I remember. It had been a while.
Of course, Bryce also wanted me to come up with a backstory for Carlyle. Who was a stuffed cat. He kept giving us homework!
You had HOMEWORK?
Yeah! I...didn't really do it. Except for watching The Red Balloon since it was a good excuse to watch it. I did think about my character(s), but I didn't write diary entries and paragraphs and whatever. He assigned us various movies or television episodes to watch to get an idea of the tone he wanted. He frequently used TV and movies as examples of what he was looking for.
He thinks like you!
I considered myself the obvious weak link in the cast, the one who had the least experience, so I was incredibly self-conscious. To make matters worse, I was almost immediately off-book since I had so few lines to memorize that I was able to know my five lines for whatever scene we were doing that night, and Bryce praised me as his "favorite person."
That sounds like a good thing.
No! I felt like I was showing off! I considered carrying my script with me even though I didn't need it, just so I didn't look like I was showing everyone up, especially Randy, the only person I had scenes with for most of the show. But if there's one thing I'm good at, it's memorizing lines.
I decided to use my higher register for Lockstock since it felt more in line with his character. It was my Acting Voice! Many times during rehearsal, though, Bryce would tell me I was speaking unnaturally. He would tell me to tell him about something normally, not in-character, and I would instinctively still use my Acting Voice, and it would be a mess. Maybe I did talk like that normally, but he wanted me to deliver my lines more naturally. I worked on it.
Some deliveries developed over time. In my first scene, I ask Drudge three exposition-heavy questions that build to a very long and elaborate spoiler of the plot to come. I asked Bryce how he wanted me to do it, and at first I tried to do them sort of robotically, but I couldn't get the build right. The more I did it, however, the more I learned where they came from, what I was thinking when I said them, and I could add some nuances that maybe no one would catch but made me feel like I was doing something. Bryce liked what I was doing, so when I made him laugh, that was a win.
So you were doing okay?
I was never really sure, but there was this one night after rehearsal...
See, several of us walked back toward BART and Muni together. One night, though, I must have stayed later for some reason, and I didn't walk back with Bryce and Sang. When I got down to the platform, though, I saw them waiting for the accursed Dublin/Pleasanton train. I walked toward them to say hi when I heard Sang say, "The more I see of Randy and Sunil..."
OH SHIT.
I stopped and didn't say anything.
"...the more I like them."
WHEW.
I walked away to avoid eavesdropping more, but I felt relieved that I was doing something right, somehow. I let them converse in private.
They like you! They really like you!
I suppose.
They didn't like you?
Well, there were various things I did that were not well received. Like, for instance, my original Carlyle voice, which was airy and light and featured extended vowels. I had a feeling it wasn't right when other people had sillier, cartoony voices, so I asked Bryce straight-out whether it was working and he said, bluntly, no, so I set to work figuring out another voice.
(I think it was that very night that I came up with my Carlyle voice, which was sort of Muppet-y. Then I ordered Chicken McNuggets at the drive-thru in said voice. It was awesome. And Bryce liked that voice much better. As did Kathy, his wife, but we'll get to that later.)
Also, there was the Sunil Shuffle.
The Sunil Shuffle?
Lockstock is a very timid character, and Drudge is mean and nasty to him, so in many scenes, I would be cautious around him, and I would reflect this by walking toward him and then, I guess, shuffling backward. Bryce tried to break me out of that habit, asking me to make sure every step I took was deliberate and with a purpose. It was fine to be timid, but be timid with a purpose. Make each step back count. I tried to be better about it. It was hard to step with a purpose in our empty rehearsal space. I had to figure out what I was doing with invisible props and checking invisible tape and looking up for no reason and I was the only person who had issues with this! Randy could work with invisible things quite easily! I didn't know what the hell to do when I wasn't speaking. ACTING IS HARD.
Stop whining, baby. You got to wear a fucking wire horse's head.
Yeah, about that...
Uh-oh.
I have one line as Horse's Head, who is in the play-within-the-play at the start of the show. Well, he's not actually in the play, but he's in the curtain call. The one line is "I have a name." With that one line, I had to figure out who this person was and how to deliver it. There were so many ways! At the readthrough, I told Sang I had come up with a bunch of ways to deliver it. He told me that no one likes an overachiever. Anyway, I was a Horse's Head. And my line was "I have a name." I have. A name.
...You didn't.
"I have...a neeeeeeiiiiiigggghhh-me!"
Oh my God.
There were groans and laughter and death threats. I said I had to do it at least once. Maybe they would go for it. It had to be done. Sang couldn't believe I had done it, and he hoped I died in a fire.
Positive feedback!
That's Sang for you. Anyway, I did the line in my regular voice, but irritated, making it the third voice I was using in the show. Well, technically, the first.
Did you do ANYTHING right?
I did have one triumph! In one exchange, Drudge is trying to explain the DeathPlay to Lockstock, and he says, "You know that glazed look people get when someone talks about their babies or pets?"
And I say, "Yes." And, naturally, I got said glazed look and spoke as if in a trance for my next couple lines, as I mused, "What about baby pets?" and "What about babies as pets?" Sang loved that I'd taken the "glazed look" cue from Drudge's line, as he hadn't even thought of that. Bryce also thought it was hilarious, but he wanted me to make "What about babies as pets?" bigger, as if it were the BEST IDEA EVER. I worked on it. Sang loved that I turned up the creep factor.
Of course, I had done the wrong glazed look, as I had played it as if I were enthralled, when the glazed look he had meant was that you were totally bored. So I adjusted my "Yes" to account for that, but then let the gears turn as I came around to the idea of baby pets and babies as pets.
Also, weeks later, I looked at the script and realized that one of the "What about"s was actually a "How about." I asked Sang if he minded, and he said that he loved the way I was doing, so keep it.
Was it weird to have the writer at rehearsal all the time?
Well, he was also the stage manager, and that was why he was there. He tried to stay out of the actual process and let Bryce be the director, but it was good to have him there if we had any questions about the script. Like what Bothans were.
Ha!!!
Wait, you got that?
I've seen Star Wars three hundred times, man.
I would not have called that.
What, I can't have layers?
I also worked on my monologue a lot.
Ooh, you got a monologue?
A short one at the top of Act II. It was another bit that changed and progressed over the course of rehearsal as I kept discovering new things about the lines and my character. In the weeks before opening, I finally realized how I wanted to do it, and I asked Bryce to see if he liked it, and he did. Sang liked that I found the existentialism in the speech. I went for a more serious interpretation and let the humor come from the lines themselves rather than playing up my exasperation at the futility of my existence. Besides, then I got choked.
Choked?
Choked. Even though I wasn't in any actual fights, I still had a couple fight calls with Kai, our fight choreographer. The first was the "techie drag," where I had to lead Randy offstage, and he fought me off. There were chairs involved. Interestingly, Kai played director a little bit during these scenes; as fight choreographer, he was also choreographing our emotions and motivation. The techie choke was more complicated because I had to fake being choked. Kai hoped I'd never actually been choked before, but he explained to me how to best pretend I was, flailing about and gasping for breath and closing my eyes. I had to deliver a line while being choked, and I had trouble not overdoing it; it was another line Bryce had issues with until he stopped having issues with it, either because I was doing it right or he gave up.
The choking got better and better, though, and it got to the point where Sang was actually worried for my safety, which meant I had done a great job. My neck was always a little sore afterward, and Kai wouldn't have been pleased to hear that, but I didn't say anything because if Randy choked me a tiny bit, it helped me sell the rest.
So how much did Randy enjoy choking you all the time?
A LITTLE TOO MUCH IF YOU ASK ME. There were times when I wondered whether he liked me-like when I thought he thought I was showing him up by being off-book-but I think he was just joking. The Thunderbirds are a sarcastic lot, but they're nice people.
Tell me more about the cast! Spill some dirt!
There will be no dirt here!
Annie was very sweet. She had two great characters to play, an evil balloon and a talking tumor, and she did hilarious voices for both of them, although she went through several before settling. She also helped do the costumes for the show, and by costumes I mean we wore a lot of our own clothes or stuff she found in a thrift store.
Sarose was the youngest member of the cast, still in college. She was an odd duck who had the habit of saying nonsense words like "poopsie pie." She also had the habit of smacking my ass with her umbrella. This happened on at least two occasions. I glared at her. On one occasion, I gave her a return volley, but she said I was not allowed to do that.
Matt seemed to be very serious, but he had a very silly side to him. One time walking to rehearsal, I spied him and walked up to him, umbrella in hand. He thanked me for not hitting his butt; I told him I had indeed considered it. He was very geeky.
As was Tavis, who wore Star Wars and Spider-Man shirts. He ad-libbed a lot and added in crazy things, half of which Bryce told him to lose but half of which he let him keep. A lot of his ad-libs were really hilarious.
Shay was also a big nerd. One day I wore my "This Is Not a Pipe" shirt on the same day he wore his 1UP shirt. He's a jolly fellow, and it was his first time playing the villain.
Chris was a perfect mime. He'd never mimed before, but he looked like a pro. I think he took some miming classes to prepare. He was nice enough to give me rides back during tech week, when I discovered we lived in practically the same neighborhood.
Jaime and I had bonded before rehearsals started, and during rehearsal, we would give each other looks to appreciate particularly amusing turns of phrase like "sweet yam in the stocking," "balloon nightmares," and "pirate hate crimes." Those were from the script. Not from the script were "tardfuck," "shitpockets," and "vagina punch," all heard on the second day of rehearsal.
Jacquie (Stanley, the puppet drama teacher) was the oldest member of the cast, with children. Because she was only in the second act, she was called less often than the rest of us (Randy and I, despite being onstage very little, were in every scene, so we were called all the damn time). A couple times, I rode with Jacquie on BART, which gave us a chance to talk, and she was just as lovely as the rest of the cast.
Theresa (Hai-Kill, the Kabuki performer) was very sweet and always smiling. She exuded positive energy, and she always welcomed me. I didn't realize for the longest time that she wasn't a newbie; she'd been in Pride and Succubus.
Sang was not in the cast, but he gets a special mention for not only being a geek but also being a Daredevil fan!!
So it looks like you had a good cast.
Yeah. No offense to any of my previous casts, but I think this is the cast that I've bonded with most and grown closest to. I basically made ten new friends. Plus Sang and Bryce and other Thunderbirds. Sure, in other shows I've done, I've already had good friends in the cast or I made friends with fellow cast members, but I've never had the experience of liking every single one of my cast members (and having them like me) before. It was great.
Did you guys ever have some sort of cast bonding thing?
Oh man! I have to tell you about the cast dinner.
At Buca di Beppo?
How did you-oh yeah.
This is what you get, blabbermouth.
So the last Saturday in February, we had rehearsal. It was also Chinese New Year, so there was a parade outside. The woman next door actually yelled, "QUIET!" at us. It was pretty funny.
After rehearsal, though, we walked to Buca di Beppo. Sang was treating us to dinner because, you know, we were bringing his play to life and he was very grateful. On the way, Jaime Lee gave me some projecting and acting tips.
What a bitch!
No, I asked for them, stupid.
Oh. What a nice person!
That's better.
As we passed the Metreon, I told her about WonderCon, and she said she wanted to go. It turned out Shay went every year, and, if you remember, we did hang out there. Jaime didn't make it, but Tavis did.
We lost Chris and Tavis at some point during the walk over, and we waited and waited and waited, but they actually beat us to the restaurant! Oops.
There were about a dozen of us at the table.
Did you get the Pope table?
We did not have enough for the Pope table! But we did have enough for all kinds of discussion and lots of food. We discussed some past shows and some future shows, and I got a lot of Thunderbird history, including stories about actors who, like, didn't show up to performances.
And it turned out Matt and his fiancée, Claire, were Guild fans, which was neat. And they recommended The Legend of Neil to me, which I still hadn't gotten around to watching. There was some Dollhouse talk. And we pimped Fringe to Shay and Tavis.
It was a very geeky table.
Indeed it was, Gerald. Indeed it was.
This one time, Jaime was talking about her boyfriend, whose last name is Hart.
"Like Hart to Hart?" I said. At the same time, Sang said it too.
Sounds like your kind of people.
We all laughed, and Sang flipped out. "I have been waiting to make a Hart and Hart reference! I HAVE BEEN WAITING MY WHOLE LIFE FOR YOU!" He gave me a high-five from across the table.
"I'm just laughing that there was a high-five over Hart to Hart," laughed Tavis.
That is pretty random.
I've never even seen it!
Oh, so remember how I told you about the time Shay and I wore matching Mario Bros. shirts?
No. That was thousands of words ago.
Anyway, that was tonight. So Jaime and Shay and I geeked out about video games during dinner, and I told them about bonding with my brother. She said I reminded her of some of her friends who had a similar passion for video games and stories about their brothers. She said that the cast party should have various gaming systems set up. She mentioned Soul Calibur, and Sang's ears perked up. He claimed he would kick all of our asses. I volunteered to be the DD.
Shay or someone mentioned a cast where a lot of the actors didn't drink, so the actors who did drink went to get drinks, and the actors who didn't just left.
Jaime responded, "So they not only don't drink, they also don't have fun?"
I said that sometimes when the only thing that's happening is people are drinking, it's not that fun.
But she said that there are also conversations and such.
"I don't have conversations," I said.
She looked at me quizzically. "You don't have conversations? I'm pretty sure we were just talking about video games."
"That wasn't a conversation," I said. "That was two parallel dialogues."
"Oh," she said. "Maybe next time."
"Maybe next time," I agreed.
And on the subject of drinking, at one point, she said, "I'm planning to ask you to take me home." Just planning to, someone commented. She hadn't asked yet.
But did she?
I thought you didn't like spoilers.
HARUMPH.
During dinner, the subject of karaoke was brought up, and we spent a great deal of time planning how best to do it and where to go. In the end, we were a small group: Sang, Jaime, Sarose, Shay, and me. Randy and Annie were maybes.
We walked to Muni, Shay leading. He said we would need exact change to get through the turnstiles.
"I have transcended change," I said.
"You've transcended change?
"I have a TransLink card."
"Aha, you have transcended change!"
We took the Muni to Church and checked out the Mint, but it was way full, so we decided to take Randy up on his offer to drive us back to BART if we did karaoke in Japantown. Sarose tried to get us a cab. She and Jaime stood by the curb, and I was with them, but Sang pulled me back and told me to let them do the work, pull in the cab with their feminine wiles, and then we would surprise him and jump in. Except, hilariously, at that moment, Shay got us a cab on the cross-street. We squeezed in.
All five of you?
Shay in the front, the rest of us in the back. We were really bonding!
On the way, Sarose told us about someone she'd met who only seemed to ever say, "Hee-eeey." So we started making jokes.
"What kind of fever do you have?" "Haaaa-aaaay."
"What street did we just pass?" Jaime thought and then realized. "Haaaa-aaaight."
And then we also came to Hayes St. "Look what street we're at now," I said.
Where did you guys go? Not that I care or anything.
Do Re Mi had private karaoke rooms. I'd only been in one of those once before for a short while. The best part is the ridiculous videos they have. They're so fucking random. Sailboats, people in water parks, Polynesian dancers, ducks, birds, Third World children waving... Nothing at all to do with the song except by coincidence.
Sang enjoyed commenting on the images during the song, as did I. "We're here at the waterfall, singing this song!" He liked my "Waterfall Sailboat Action!"
Was anyone actually a good singer?
Jaime was in a cover band. She played drums and sangs, so she was great at karaokeness. She could really belt out those eighties ballads.
What about you?
The first song I sang was "Time Is Running Out" by Muse. They didn't have "Knights of Cydonia," which Sang and Shay would have loved to do.
Muse! At karaoke!
I KNOW! Except the lyrics were hilariously wrong. Instead of "Now that you know I'm trapped / Sense of elation," it said, "Now that you know I'm trapped / Since ovulation."
Um.
Yeah.
I saw that they had a lot of Green Day, and I was going to do "Letterbomb," but Sarose saw that they had "She" and said it was the best song and I should do it, so I said, "I'll do it for you." I think I've sung that one at karaoke before.
They had all your favorite bands, huh?
They had a wide, varied selection! There was a joke about Linkin Park in the play, so I wanted to do a Linkin Park song in honor of that, even though it wasn't one everyone would sing along to. I did "Faint," which was a little difficult but fun. Sang took the other microphone and tried to do backup vocals but he didn't know the song. So he did what he frequently did, which was just to go "What?" after various lines. Or, more accurately, "What!" He gave me a high-five afterward, though, because he could not believe I just did Linkin Park.
Sounds like fun.
Shay's girlfriend, Christina, arrived, and Randy came with beer.
I didn't think you were allowed to-
Shhh.
Randy put in songs that he knew everyone would sing along to, like "Buddy Holly" and "Say It Ain't So" and "Sweet Child o' Mine." And "I Will Follow You into the Dark." Just to bring the mood down.
Shay put on "Bullet with Butterfly Wings," so I took the other microphone, and it was awesome. I wasn't sure whether he would do it, but thankfully he also did the screaming "CAAAAAAAGE!" when appropriate. We also did "I'm on a Boat," which I totally rocked. And Shay was T-Pain.
That...that sounds amazing. I kinda wish I'd been there.
You wouldn't have fit in the room. Wings and tail and all.
Fucking speciesist karaoke rooms. That is so not ADA-compliant.
Don't tell me. American Dragon Act?
Got it in one.
That's not a real act. Can we get back to me, please? Because I sang "I'm on a Boat" and you did not. Everyone seemed very impressed with me. "I am so proud of you guys," said Sang. "I am so, so proud of you guys."
I guess it was definitely a side of me they had not seen before. But they really should take a good hard look at the motherfucking boat.
Sang sure was enjoying himself.
He was having a good time! He would also sometimes insert our names into the songs he was singing.
Did that go well?
I couldn't hear how it went sometimes, but it was funny. When Christina did "Born to Be Wild," he would pass us the microphone during the chorus so we could sing a line.
"Boooorn to be wiiiiild."
"Sunil P*tel!"
"Boooooorn to be wiiiiild."
"Jaime Lee Curtis!"
Seriously???
No, stupid.
Goddammit. I thought I was the rude one in this relationship.
As karaoke wound down, I turned to Jaime and said, "So are you still planning to ask me to take you home?"
"Oh! Yes!" she said. "Can you take me home?" Of course I would.
How long did you guys do karaoke?
Two hours, which cost a pretty penny, I tell you. I offered to cover it, since I'd just gotten my bonus and I thought it would make a good impression, being new to the group. Sang said I should ask for contributions first, so some people gave me money, and I covered the rest. He thanked me sincerely. It felt good.
Big spender!
Sometimes it's worth it. Nights like that are totally worth it.
Randy gave us a ride back to BART. Sarose was going to take Muni, but instead she found that she could catch a better train by Randy's place anyway, so she could continue with him. She hugged me and Sang and Jaime, giving us kisses on the cheek.
Sang and Jaime and I went down to the BART station, and Sang found her naivety about BART, having moved from New York, adorable. Sang had also moved from New York, but long ago. Jaime just moved here in August. And we were her first friends that weren't her boyfriend's friends. Aw.
On BART, Sang asked her where her stop was, and where mine was, and I saw where he was going and assured him I was taking her home. It was cute that he was looking out for her too. Jaime showed us pictures of her boyfriend on her phone. And some pictures from Halloween. Sang sat behind us and slept a bit, I think. He got off at 12th St. We got off at Macarthur.
She thanked me for giving her a ride home. "I live to give you rides home, Jaime."
You totally do!
She said it was really good on a night like this when her boyfriend was out of town and she couldn't call him when she left the BART station to let her know she was on her way so if she was not home in so many minutes, she was probably dead, so call the police. Well, she didn't say all that, but you know.
When she noticed my car had input for an iPod, she played a song for me that she wasn't sure I'd like, but it was all right even though it wasn't my thing.
What song?
I don't remember the name, but it was by the Dirty Projectors. Who, by chance, I saw a mention of in Entertainment Weekly a few days later.
Then she asked if I wanted to hear some songs from the musical she wrote. Of course I did! It was about rainbow kittens and cyborg cops and...stuff. It was an epic sci-fi musical.
You have interesting friends.
I sure do.
She gave me a hug when I dropped her off, and I made sure she got inside okay; she waved to me from the doorstep. And then I drove home. It had been good times.
That sounds like an awesome night! But holy fucking shit, are you ever going to get to THE GODDAMN PLAY??
Man, I haven't even gotten to the puppets yet.
Jesus Christ.
I'll tell you the rest tomorrow.
I WILL FUCKING EAT YOU IF YOU DON'T FINISH THIS STORY.
ROOOOAAAAWWWWWRRRR!!!
What are you doing here, Gerald?
Remember that time you were in DeathPlay? Wasn't it awesome?
Yes, I just said that.
What was auditioning like?
Oh, I see what you're doing. Fine, I'll play your little game. Did you at least eat this time?
I make no promises.
When I get to the part about the cast dinner at Buca di Beppo, you'd better behave.
Dude-
SPOILER WARNING.
So I know you auditioned in December. How was that?
Well, I already knew that Thunderbird auditions were fun, and this was no exception. Although my scene partners, as I said, were not exactly tip-top. We did one exercise where we just went through the alphabet letter-by-letter but in-character (I did a terrible French accent), and the girl kept screwing up. As in, she skipped letters. Because she didn't know the alphabet. I don't know.
One of the best parts was reading excerpts from Craigslist ads as if they were a conversation in a bar. So I really wanted someone to just sit in my lap, and she had some other bizarre kinky fetish she wanted fulfilled.
Uh, did you actually do any scenes from the play?
Oh, yeah, we did that too! In some of those scenes, I thought my co-stars did okay.
Hey, I'll bet you were just reminded of something you forgot to tell me.
You're right! Because Sang, the writer, was excited and pleased to see me! He had seen me as Innocent Victim, I think.
Well, you must have done something right at the audition since they cast you.
I was cast as Lockstock, a role I hadn't even read for! I had read a scene with Drudge, the other union stagehand, but I had no idea what Lockstock was like. I was the very last person Bryce, the director, called, which made me think it was the smallest part in the play, but whatever, I knew I'd have fun. Since I was the last person, he could tell me who else was cast, and I recognized a few names from previous shows.
Did you get a script?
Eventually! It was still being finalized. We got it a few days before the readthrough on January 24, and I read it at work.
What'd you think?
Er.
Uh-oh.
It wasn't quite what I expected. Officially, it was a "full-length sketch" rather than a play, so it was sort of a collection of absurdist, surreal scenes connected by the semblance of a plot. It was funny in parts, but I wasn't sure I really...got it. Most of the funny jokes to me were the meta jokes about theatre, and I was afraid that would limit the audience. Also, it was surprisingly vulgar. I didn't know Sang, but I guessed it was his Thing. One of them, at least. Also: Star Wars references. There were a lot.
What about your part?
You mean parts! I had three roles!
Awesome!
Well, one role was Horse's Head, who just has one line in the first scene.
Oh.
But the other role was Carlyle, who was a stuffed cat.
What?
In the Land of Misfit Supporting Characters.
What?
Beyond the Fourth Wall.
What?
It'll make sense eventually.
I doubt that.
Anyway, I was sort of disappointed by my part(s). I didn't seem to be onstage very much, and I hardly got any funny lines! Instead, Drudge got the jokes, and he even got more lines when he was a puppet.
That sucks!
Oh, don't worry. My initial impressions were wrong. Our characters were stagehands, so we basically came in at the beginning and end of every scene to change the scene and comment on the action without actually taking part in the plot of the play. We were like walking meta jokes. And as for my other roles, I got to wear a fucking wire horse's head and come up with a hilarious cat voice. No, Gerald, I was wrong. You can't judge a show by just reading the script. It's only when you perform it that you see what it really is.
That is so profound. Now shut up and get on with the story.
The readthrough was traditionally at Tommy's Joynt in San Francisco. It was my Thunderbird initiation! Most of the cast was there as well as some of the crew. Plus significant others. Amusingly, Chris (Merci, the mime) brought a date. Tavis (Doc, the character actor) wasn't there, so Dan read for him, and we joked that he was pretty good and we were going to replace Tavis. The readthrough went well, a highlight being Shay's (Punch, the clown) Italian-esque accent for his character, which was perfect. In rehearsals, we played with dropping it when he wasn't "in-character," but in the end, it worked best to have him talk like that the whole time.
Did you offer anyone a ride home?
It's like you know the important parts of this tale before I tell them...
I watch a lot of Psych. It's made me kind of psychic.
Shawn's not really psychic. You know that, right?
...WHAT?!
Moving on.
Jaime Lee (Mouche, the supporting character) lived in Berkeley, and Dan had no problem with my taking her home. She, like me, was new to the Thunderbirds, but more than that, she was new to San Francisco. I don't remember what we talked about on the way, but it was a good bonding experience.
And she forgot her headband in my car so I brought it to rehearsal.
That is totally the beginning of a romantic comedy.
But she moved out here for her boyfriend, so it's not like that. Everyone had a boyfriend! Or a girlfriend! Or a friend. Hell, Randy (Drudge, the stagehand) and Annie (Fantomas, the balloon) were dating each other. I was the only single person in the cast. Except for Chris. Who was gay.
HMM.
No.
He did bring a date to the readthrough. Yeah, you're out of luck.
That's okay. I didn't get into theatre to meet women.
Yes you did.
Not just to meet women.
At least you're being honest. Anyway, what was the rehearsal process like?
Well, first of all, we rehearsed in the basement of a cigarette store.
Really?
Really.
Classy.
This is independent theatre, baby. We can't afford class.
Even better, next door was a woman who banged on the wall and yelled when we were loud or pumped up some Arabian techno, which made our work a bit challenging. But fun and entertaining.
Did you dive right into the show?
No, the first couple rehearsals were a lot of cast bonding and improv work. We declared our favorite animal, food, and color to a partner, and in the future, we would be called upon to tell the rest of the cast what our partner's favorites were. And then later, we would have to know the favorites of people who weren't our partner. It was a fun way to get to know each other.
We also acted out each other's wacky dreams. Among other warm-ups, mental and physical. It was fun.
But THEN you actually...rehearsed, right?
Yeah! Or I watched other people rehearse. Since I wasn't in the show very much. But watching rehearsal was immensely entertaining too since the Thunderbirds are funny folk, in addition to being good actors! There was one scene between Matt (Harold, the improv actor) and Sarose (Bina, the stage manager) that Bryce made them do over and over again, and it kept getting better and better. Directing! Acting! Bryce wanted everyone to come up with backstories for their characters, to know what our characters were doing when they were not onstage. Even lowly Lockstock. It was weird, but I think it was the first time a director had ever really told me to focus on character before. And I was in fucking Wit. It's such a basic part of acting, but I don't think I'd done it. I'd said the words and had fake emotions, but I hadn't really thought about my character and who he was, really. That I remember. It had been a while.
Of course, Bryce also wanted me to come up with a backstory for Carlyle. Who was a stuffed cat. He kept giving us homework!
You had HOMEWORK?
Yeah! I...didn't really do it. Except for watching The Red Balloon since it was a good excuse to watch it. I did think about my character(s), but I didn't write diary entries and paragraphs and whatever. He assigned us various movies or television episodes to watch to get an idea of the tone he wanted. He frequently used TV and movies as examples of what he was looking for.
He thinks like you!
I considered myself the obvious weak link in the cast, the one who had the least experience, so I was incredibly self-conscious. To make matters worse, I was almost immediately off-book since I had so few lines to memorize that I was able to know my five lines for whatever scene we were doing that night, and Bryce praised me as his "favorite person."
That sounds like a good thing.
No! I felt like I was showing off! I considered carrying my script with me even though I didn't need it, just so I didn't look like I was showing everyone up, especially Randy, the only person I had scenes with for most of the show. But if there's one thing I'm good at, it's memorizing lines.
I decided to use my higher register for Lockstock since it felt more in line with his character. It was my Acting Voice! Many times during rehearsal, though, Bryce would tell me I was speaking unnaturally. He would tell me to tell him about something normally, not in-character, and I would instinctively still use my Acting Voice, and it would be a mess. Maybe I did talk like that normally, but he wanted me to deliver my lines more naturally. I worked on it.
Some deliveries developed over time. In my first scene, I ask Drudge three exposition-heavy questions that build to a very long and elaborate spoiler of the plot to come. I asked Bryce how he wanted me to do it, and at first I tried to do them sort of robotically, but I couldn't get the build right. The more I did it, however, the more I learned where they came from, what I was thinking when I said them, and I could add some nuances that maybe no one would catch but made me feel like I was doing something. Bryce liked what I was doing, so when I made him laugh, that was a win.
So you were doing okay?
I was never really sure, but there was this one night after rehearsal...
See, several of us walked back toward BART and Muni together. One night, though, I must have stayed later for some reason, and I didn't walk back with Bryce and Sang. When I got down to the platform, though, I saw them waiting for the accursed Dublin/Pleasanton train. I walked toward them to say hi when I heard Sang say, "The more I see of Randy and Sunil..."
OH SHIT.
I stopped and didn't say anything.
"...the more I like them."
WHEW.
I walked away to avoid eavesdropping more, but I felt relieved that I was doing something right, somehow. I let them converse in private.
They like you! They really like you!
I suppose.
They didn't like you?
Well, there were various things I did that were not well received. Like, for instance, my original Carlyle voice, which was airy and light and featured extended vowels. I had a feeling it wasn't right when other people had sillier, cartoony voices, so I asked Bryce straight-out whether it was working and he said, bluntly, no, so I set to work figuring out another voice.
(I think it was that very night that I came up with my Carlyle voice, which was sort of Muppet-y. Then I ordered Chicken McNuggets at the drive-thru in said voice. It was awesome. And Bryce liked that voice much better. As did Kathy, his wife, but we'll get to that later.)
Also, there was the Sunil Shuffle.
The Sunil Shuffle?
Lockstock is a very timid character, and Drudge is mean and nasty to him, so in many scenes, I would be cautious around him, and I would reflect this by walking toward him and then, I guess, shuffling backward. Bryce tried to break me out of that habit, asking me to make sure every step I took was deliberate and with a purpose. It was fine to be timid, but be timid with a purpose. Make each step back count. I tried to be better about it. It was hard to step with a purpose in our empty rehearsal space. I had to figure out what I was doing with invisible props and checking invisible tape and looking up for no reason and I was the only person who had issues with this! Randy could work with invisible things quite easily! I didn't know what the hell to do when I wasn't speaking. ACTING IS HARD.
Stop whining, baby. You got to wear a fucking wire horse's head.
Yeah, about that...
Uh-oh.
I have one line as Horse's Head, who is in the play-within-the-play at the start of the show. Well, he's not actually in the play, but he's in the curtain call. The one line is "I have a name." With that one line, I had to figure out who this person was and how to deliver it. There were so many ways! At the readthrough, I told Sang I had come up with a bunch of ways to deliver it. He told me that no one likes an overachiever. Anyway, I was a Horse's Head. And my line was "I have a name." I have. A name.
...You didn't.
"I have...a neeeeeeiiiiiigggghhh-me!"
Oh my God.
There were groans and laughter and death threats. I said I had to do it at least once. Maybe they would go for it. It had to be done. Sang couldn't believe I had done it, and he hoped I died in a fire.
Positive feedback!
That's Sang for you. Anyway, I did the line in my regular voice, but irritated, making it the third voice I was using in the show. Well, technically, the first.
Did you do ANYTHING right?
I did have one triumph! In one exchange, Drudge is trying to explain the DeathPlay to Lockstock, and he says, "You know that glazed look people get when someone talks about their babies or pets?"
And I say, "Yes." And, naturally, I got said glazed look and spoke as if in a trance for my next couple lines, as I mused, "What about baby pets?" and "What about babies as pets?" Sang loved that I'd taken the "glazed look" cue from Drudge's line, as he hadn't even thought of that. Bryce also thought it was hilarious, but he wanted me to make "What about babies as pets?" bigger, as if it were the BEST IDEA EVER. I worked on it. Sang loved that I turned up the creep factor.
Of course, I had done the wrong glazed look, as I had played it as if I were enthralled, when the glazed look he had meant was that you were totally bored. So I adjusted my "Yes" to account for that, but then let the gears turn as I came around to the idea of baby pets and babies as pets.
Also, weeks later, I looked at the script and realized that one of the "What about"s was actually a "How about." I asked Sang if he minded, and he said that he loved the way I was doing, so keep it.
Was it weird to have the writer at rehearsal all the time?
Well, he was also the stage manager, and that was why he was there. He tried to stay out of the actual process and let Bryce be the director, but it was good to have him there if we had any questions about the script. Like what Bothans were.
Ha!!!
Wait, you got that?
I've seen Star Wars three hundred times, man.
I would not have called that.
What, I can't have layers?
I also worked on my monologue a lot.
Ooh, you got a monologue?
A short one at the top of Act II. It was another bit that changed and progressed over the course of rehearsal as I kept discovering new things about the lines and my character. In the weeks before opening, I finally realized how I wanted to do it, and I asked Bryce to see if he liked it, and he did. Sang liked that I found the existentialism in the speech. I went for a more serious interpretation and let the humor come from the lines themselves rather than playing up my exasperation at the futility of my existence. Besides, then I got choked.
Choked?
Choked. Even though I wasn't in any actual fights, I still had a couple fight calls with Kai, our fight choreographer. The first was the "techie drag," where I had to lead Randy offstage, and he fought me off. There were chairs involved. Interestingly, Kai played director a little bit during these scenes; as fight choreographer, he was also choreographing our emotions and motivation. The techie choke was more complicated because I had to fake being choked. Kai hoped I'd never actually been choked before, but he explained to me how to best pretend I was, flailing about and gasping for breath and closing my eyes. I had to deliver a line while being choked, and I had trouble not overdoing it; it was another line Bryce had issues with until he stopped having issues with it, either because I was doing it right or he gave up.
The choking got better and better, though, and it got to the point where Sang was actually worried for my safety, which meant I had done a great job. My neck was always a little sore afterward, and Kai wouldn't have been pleased to hear that, but I didn't say anything because if Randy choked me a tiny bit, it helped me sell the rest.
So how much did Randy enjoy choking you all the time?
A LITTLE TOO MUCH IF YOU ASK ME. There were times when I wondered whether he liked me-like when I thought he thought I was showing him up by being off-book-but I think he was just joking. The Thunderbirds are a sarcastic lot, but they're nice people.
Tell me more about the cast! Spill some dirt!
There will be no dirt here!
Annie was very sweet. She had two great characters to play, an evil balloon and a talking tumor, and she did hilarious voices for both of them, although she went through several before settling. She also helped do the costumes for the show, and by costumes I mean we wore a lot of our own clothes or stuff she found in a thrift store.
Sarose was the youngest member of the cast, still in college. She was an odd duck who had the habit of saying nonsense words like "poopsie pie." She also had the habit of smacking my ass with her umbrella. This happened on at least two occasions. I glared at her. On one occasion, I gave her a return volley, but she said I was not allowed to do that.
Matt seemed to be very serious, but he had a very silly side to him. One time walking to rehearsal, I spied him and walked up to him, umbrella in hand. He thanked me for not hitting his butt; I told him I had indeed considered it. He was very geeky.
As was Tavis, who wore Star Wars and Spider-Man shirts. He ad-libbed a lot and added in crazy things, half of which Bryce told him to lose but half of which he let him keep. A lot of his ad-libs were really hilarious.
Shay was also a big nerd. One day I wore my "This Is Not a Pipe" shirt on the same day he wore his 1UP shirt. He's a jolly fellow, and it was his first time playing the villain.
Chris was a perfect mime. He'd never mimed before, but he looked like a pro. I think he took some miming classes to prepare. He was nice enough to give me rides back during tech week, when I discovered we lived in practically the same neighborhood.
Jaime and I had bonded before rehearsals started, and during rehearsal, we would give each other looks to appreciate particularly amusing turns of phrase like "sweet yam in the stocking," "balloon nightmares," and "pirate hate crimes." Those were from the script. Not from the script were "tardfuck," "shitpockets," and "vagina punch," all heard on the second day of rehearsal.
Jacquie (Stanley, the puppet drama teacher) was the oldest member of the cast, with children. Because she was only in the second act, she was called less often than the rest of us (Randy and I, despite being onstage very little, were in every scene, so we were called all the damn time). A couple times, I rode with Jacquie on BART, which gave us a chance to talk, and she was just as lovely as the rest of the cast.
Theresa (Hai-Kill, the Kabuki performer) was very sweet and always smiling. She exuded positive energy, and she always welcomed me. I didn't realize for the longest time that she wasn't a newbie; she'd been in Pride and Succubus.
Sang was not in the cast, but he gets a special mention for not only being a geek but also being a Daredevil fan!!
So it looks like you had a good cast.
Yeah. No offense to any of my previous casts, but I think this is the cast that I've bonded with most and grown closest to. I basically made ten new friends. Plus Sang and Bryce and other Thunderbirds. Sure, in other shows I've done, I've already had good friends in the cast or I made friends with fellow cast members, but I've never had the experience of liking every single one of my cast members (and having them like me) before. It was great.
Did you guys ever have some sort of cast bonding thing?
Oh man! I have to tell you about the cast dinner.
At Buca di Beppo?
How did you-oh yeah.
This is what you get, blabbermouth.
So the last Saturday in February, we had rehearsal. It was also Chinese New Year, so there was a parade outside. The woman next door actually yelled, "QUIET!" at us. It was pretty funny.
After rehearsal, though, we walked to Buca di Beppo. Sang was treating us to dinner because, you know, we were bringing his play to life and he was very grateful. On the way, Jaime Lee gave me some projecting and acting tips.
What a bitch!
No, I asked for them, stupid.
Oh. What a nice person!
That's better.
As we passed the Metreon, I told her about WonderCon, and she said she wanted to go. It turned out Shay went every year, and, if you remember, we did hang out there. Jaime didn't make it, but Tavis did.
We lost Chris and Tavis at some point during the walk over, and we waited and waited and waited, but they actually beat us to the restaurant! Oops.
There were about a dozen of us at the table.
Did you get the Pope table?
We did not have enough for the Pope table! But we did have enough for all kinds of discussion and lots of food. We discussed some past shows and some future shows, and I got a lot of Thunderbird history, including stories about actors who, like, didn't show up to performances.
And it turned out Matt and his fiancée, Claire, were Guild fans, which was neat. And they recommended The Legend of Neil to me, which I still hadn't gotten around to watching. There was some Dollhouse talk. And we pimped Fringe to Shay and Tavis.
It was a very geeky table.
Indeed it was, Gerald. Indeed it was.
This one time, Jaime was talking about her boyfriend, whose last name is Hart.
"Like Hart to Hart?" I said. At the same time, Sang said it too.
Sounds like your kind of people.
We all laughed, and Sang flipped out. "I have been waiting to make a Hart and Hart reference! I HAVE BEEN WAITING MY WHOLE LIFE FOR YOU!" He gave me a high-five from across the table.
"I'm just laughing that there was a high-five over Hart to Hart," laughed Tavis.
That is pretty random.
I've never even seen it!
Oh, so remember how I told you about the time Shay and I wore matching Mario Bros. shirts?
No. That was thousands of words ago.
Anyway, that was tonight. So Jaime and Shay and I geeked out about video games during dinner, and I told them about bonding with my brother. She said I reminded her of some of her friends who had a similar passion for video games and stories about their brothers. She said that the cast party should have various gaming systems set up. She mentioned Soul Calibur, and Sang's ears perked up. He claimed he would kick all of our asses. I volunteered to be the DD.
Shay or someone mentioned a cast where a lot of the actors didn't drink, so the actors who did drink went to get drinks, and the actors who didn't just left.
Jaime responded, "So they not only don't drink, they also don't have fun?"
I said that sometimes when the only thing that's happening is people are drinking, it's not that fun.
But she said that there are also conversations and such.
"I don't have conversations," I said.
She looked at me quizzically. "You don't have conversations? I'm pretty sure we were just talking about video games."
"That wasn't a conversation," I said. "That was two parallel dialogues."
"Oh," she said. "Maybe next time."
"Maybe next time," I agreed.
And on the subject of drinking, at one point, she said, "I'm planning to ask you to take me home." Just planning to, someone commented. She hadn't asked yet.
But did she?
I thought you didn't like spoilers.
HARUMPH.
During dinner, the subject of karaoke was brought up, and we spent a great deal of time planning how best to do it and where to go. In the end, we were a small group: Sang, Jaime, Sarose, Shay, and me. Randy and Annie were maybes.
We walked to Muni, Shay leading. He said we would need exact change to get through the turnstiles.
"I have transcended change," I said.
"You've transcended change?
"I have a TransLink card."
"Aha, you have transcended change!"
We took the Muni to Church and checked out the Mint, but it was way full, so we decided to take Randy up on his offer to drive us back to BART if we did karaoke in Japantown. Sarose tried to get us a cab. She and Jaime stood by the curb, and I was with them, but Sang pulled me back and told me to let them do the work, pull in the cab with their feminine wiles, and then we would surprise him and jump in. Except, hilariously, at that moment, Shay got us a cab on the cross-street. We squeezed in.
All five of you?
Shay in the front, the rest of us in the back. We were really bonding!
On the way, Sarose told us about someone she'd met who only seemed to ever say, "Hee-eeey." So we started making jokes.
"What kind of fever do you have?" "Haaaa-aaaay."
"What street did we just pass?" Jaime thought and then realized. "Haaaa-aaaight."
And then we also came to Hayes St. "Look what street we're at now," I said.
Where did you guys go? Not that I care or anything.
Do Re Mi had private karaoke rooms. I'd only been in one of those once before for a short while. The best part is the ridiculous videos they have. They're so fucking random. Sailboats, people in water parks, Polynesian dancers, ducks, birds, Third World children waving... Nothing at all to do with the song except by coincidence.
Sang enjoyed commenting on the images during the song, as did I. "We're here at the waterfall, singing this song!" He liked my "Waterfall Sailboat Action!"
Was anyone actually a good singer?
Jaime was in a cover band. She played drums and sangs, so she was great at karaokeness. She could really belt out those eighties ballads.
What about you?
The first song I sang was "Time Is Running Out" by Muse. They didn't have "Knights of Cydonia," which Sang and Shay would have loved to do.
Muse! At karaoke!
I KNOW! Except the lyrics were hilariously wrong. Instead of "Now that you know I'm trapped / Sense of elation," it said, "Now that you know I'm trapped / Since ovulation."
Um.
Yeah.
I saw that they had a lot of Green Day, and I was going to do "Letterbomb," but Sarose saw that they had "She" and said it was the best song and I should do it, so I said, "I'll do it for you." I think I've sung that one at karaoke before.
They had all your favorite bands, huh?
They had a wide, varied selection! There was a joke about Linkin Park in the play, so I wanted to do a Linkin Park song in honor of that, even though it wasn't one everyone would sing along to. I did "Faint," which was a little difficult but fun. Sang took the other microphone and tried to do backup vocals but he didn't know the song. So he did what he frequently did, which was just to go "What?" after various lines. Or, more accurately, "What!" He gave me a high-five afterward, though, because he could not believe I just did Linkin Park.
Sounds like fun.
Shay's girlfriend, Christina, arrived, and Randy came with beer.
I didn't think you were allowed to-
Shhh.
Randy put in songs that he knew everyone would sing along to, like "Buddy Holly" and "Say It Ain't So" and "Sweet Child o' Mine." And "I Will Follow You into the Dark." Just to bring the mood down.
Shay put on "Bullet with Butterfly Wings," so I took the other microphone, and it was awesome. I wasn't sure whether he would do it, but thankfully he also did the screaming "CAAAAAAAGE!" when appropriate. We also did "I'm on a Boat," which I totally rocked. And Shay was T-Pain.
That...that sounds amazing. I kinda wish I'd been there.
You wouldn't have fit in the room. Wings and tail and all.
Fucking speciesist karaoke rooms. That is so not ADA-compliant.
Don't tell me. American Dragon Act?
Got it in one.
That's not a real act. Can we get back to me, please? Because I sang "I'm on a Boat" and you did not. Everyone seemed very impressed with me. "I am so proud of you guys," said Sang. "I am so, so proud of you guys."
I guess it was definitely a side of me they had not seen before. But they really should take a good hard look at the motherfucking boat.
Sang sure was enjoying himself.
He was having a good time! He would also sometimes insert our names into the songs he was singing.
Did that go well?
I couldn't hear how it went sometimes, but it was funny. When Christina did "Born to Be Wild," he would pass us the microphone during the chorus so we could sing a line.
"Boooorn to be wiiiiild."
"Sunil P*tel!"
"Boooooorn to be wiiiiild."
"Jaime Lee Curtis!"
Seriously???
No, stupid.
Goddammit. I thought I was the rude one in this relationship.
As karaoke wound down, I turned to Jaime and said, "So are you still planning to ask me to take you home?"
"Oh! Yes!" she said. "Can you take me home?" Of course I would.
How long did you guys do karaoke?
Two hours, which cost a pretty penny, I tell you. I offered to cover it, since I'd just gotten my bonus and I thought it would make a good impression, being new to the group. Sang said I should ask for contributions first, so some people gave me money, and I covered the rest. He thanked me sincerely. It felt good.
Big spender!
Sometimes it's worth it. Nights like that are totally worth it.
Randy gave us a ride back to BART. Sarose was going to take Muni, but instead she found that she could catch a better train by Randy's place anyway, so she could continue with him. She hugged me and Sang and Jaime, giving us kisses on the cheek.
Sang and Jaime and I went down to the BART station, and Sang found her naivety about BART, having moved from New York, adorable. Sang had also moved from New York, but long ago. Jaime just moved here in August. And we were her first friends that weren't her boyfriend's friends. Aw.
On BART, Sang asked her where her stop was, and where mine was, and I saw where he was going and assured him I was taking her home. It was cute that he was looking out for her too. Jaime showed us pictures of her boyfriend on her phone. And some pictures from Halloween. Sang sat behind us and slept a bit, I think. He got off at 12th St. We got off at Macarthur.
She thanked me for giving her a ride home. "I live to give you rides home, Jaime."
You totally do!
She said it was really good on a night like this when her boyfriend was out of town and she couldn't call him when she left the BART station to let her know she was on her way so if she was not home in so many minutes, she was probably dead, so call the police. Well, she didn't say all that, but you know.
When she noticed my car had input for an iPod, she played a song for me that she wasn't sure I'd like, but it was all right even though it wasn't my thing.
What song?
I don't remember the name, but it was by the Dirty Projectors. Who, by chance, I saw a mention of in Entertainment Weekly a few days later.
Then she asked if I wanted to hear some songs from the musical she wrote. Of course I did! It was about rainbow kittens and cyborg cops and...stuff. It was an epic sci-fi musical.
You have interesting friends.
I sure do.
She gave me a hug when I dropped her off, and I made sure she got inside okay; she waved to me from the doorstep. And then I drove home. It had been good times.
That sounds like an awesome night! But holy fucking shit, are you ever going to get to THE GODDAMN PLAY??
Man, I haven't even gotten to the puppets yet.
Jesus Christ.
I'll tell you the rest tomorrow.
I WILL FUCKING EAT YOU IF YOU DON'T FINISH THIS STORY.