things I like to do in my spare time

[spacefem]

question meme day

lantairvlea asks What do you like to do in your (I imagine often hypothetical) spare time?I feel like it's a requirement of motherhood to joke about our lack of spare time. You'll get friendly nods if you stand up in a meeting and say "I have two children under the age of 5. So my hobbies are... I don't know, showering

Comments

[aryanhwy]

people make the time to do the shit we want to do

Yeah.

You might think that between having a 3 year old and a full-time early-career academic post, I have no life. But that's not true at all. I have quite a bit of life. My husband and I eat pizza, drink beer, and watch Sci Fi every Saturday (that we're home). We travel regularly. I read every night before bed. I spent the weekend dyeing fabric and sewing new clothes out of it. I recently published a book of academic research wholly unrelated to my "day job". I've got plenty of hobbies, and I think that my ability to handle my academic responsibilities AND my parenting responsibilities is all the better for it.

[I also never understood the new-mother-not-showering trope. I never missed a shower; I figured no matter how unhappy she was (and she never was!), it wouldn't kill Gwen to roll around on the bathmat for 10 minutes until I was done.]

[lantairvlea]

I don't get the not showering thing either. It doesn't hurt a baby to have 10 minutes of tummy time by the shower or even hang out in its crib.

[lantairvlea]

That's awesome you have your hand in so many things and keep fairly active in them. Sorry the weather doesn't usually cooperate with your flying.

I know I don't out the time I used to into my hobbies (except for the horses at this point), but I am trying to do better about that and even getting the boys to take part in what ways they can right now.

[sandokai]

Do your kids cry and scream and clutch and beg and whatnot though? It seems like the "go off and play" thing would work better with some personalities of kids than others. Sometimes I ignore their crying so I can do the dishes or whatever but it doesn't necessarily make them go off and play.

[spacefem]

I'm pretty determined on it though. Yes they do whine cry complain, but as long as I've spent or will spend some time with them that evening I don't feel terribly guilty.

[lavenderspark]

I actually have time to myself now, but have trouble finding things to do. When my daughter started school last fall, I realized I have no hobbies.

But over the school year I re-taught myself how to crochet, I've done some sewing, gotten back into icon making a bit, and tried to make more of a social life for myself online.

I've also tried to learn/understand things that go on in society that I was unaware of before. Things like feminism and equality for ALL so that I can be a better person and so I can pass on the things I learn to my daughter.

[spacefem]

woohoo!

[mrs_dragon]

There is a "cult of busy" in our culture. If you say you are "soo busy" people shower you with sympathy and attention (and some competition to be the busiest). But if you say, "screw it, I manage my time to make time for the things that matter and no I am not doing that thing you want me to do", then you are a colossal bitch.

(Also, having a supportive partner makes this so much more doable.)