dear 59-kun 10
A/N: TO NAPPO AND KIRI: Okay, so...Halloween is too far away. You guys are totes getting things in response in the next week or so. Your present gift baskets consist of FSTs for the both of you, gift artz (I'M SORRY IF IT'S FAIL, ORZ), and you guys are demanded to give me a pairing from a fandom so I can give you your little bundles of joy by Friday. :D
Other people! Sorry this took so long. :/ Is lazy. P: Also! If you'd like to send me a letter, drop it HERE! :D
Dear 59-kun
Climatically
When he found his eyes tired, but still open, at something close to four in the morning, he was unbelievably annoyed. He found himself destroying his pillows, and quickly following that, the nearest table. Unable to sleep again, thanks to the stupid baseball freak’s words echoing in his ears, he grabbed a cigarette from the bedside, shoved it in his mouth, and fumbled for his lighter. After the nicotine was slowly entering his lungs, he let out a sigh and watched the puffs cloud around his green eyes. Then he turned on his computer and sat down to finish reading some more messages on his advice column-blog-thing.
…
Dear Hayato,
I baked you cake to celebrate you finally confessing. Come over and we can share it with Reborn~ Do you think I should feed it to him? And hurry up, the kids are getting restless and want to eat it.
P.s: Stop being mean to people who just want advice, Or I'll personally go over there and stuff the cake in your face.
~Your Loving Sister
…
Dear How In The Hell Did You Even…Never Mind,
How did you find this, actually? …Never mind, Reborn-san told you. As for my confessing-does he know all of my business?! IS NOTHING SACRED?
As for your cake…how about a big fat damn no. I have no interest in, you know, dying, before I get an answer.
…
Dear 59-kun:
There is this person recently who saved my live and I really like the person a lot. But he is quite obsessed with harming another person, who is my boss, and I respect him a lot. What do you think I should do?
ChocoSkull
…
Dear What Is This I Don’t Even,
That sounds fucked up. You should go piss on him, and tell him that your job is more important than his petty grudge, or whatever the hell his beef is.
…
Dear 59-san,
I think there's something living in a certain piece of jewelry I own, and sometimes I get the feeling it's watching me or whispering suggestive things to me inside my head. I don't mind talking with people inside my head sometimes, but I'm starting to fear for my girlish virtue. What should I do?
-ixgxaxn
…
Dear Talks to Inanimate Objects,
It’s probably haunted, that’s what! Go consult a spiritual medium, and get that taken care of. Poltergeists can get to be fucking annoying if you keep ignoring them.
…
Dear 59-kun,
I think you should soften down on the anger replies. I worry about your blood pressure levels! I wouldn’t want you to die on me.
~dame
…
Dear Don’t I Know You?
I…what do you care about my blood pressure levels? I’m perfectly healthy, thanks.
I have someone to protect! I refuse to die unless it’s in the midst of protecting them.
…
I really don't like you 59-pyon,
But Hi anyway. Do you know why letters keep coming in? Because people love you. People LOVE how you reply to rudely and bastardly, if that's a word. I bet it's not, but don't use it against me because it would just show how idiotic you are because you can't use anything other than that against me, you know.
I don't care if you call me names, because I've been called names a lot of times. And to be honest, I think name calling is just childish. I suggest you grow up and start behaving like a proper right-hand man to your 'almighty god' Sawada Tsunayoshi. Maybe he would grow to become a great leader, but right now he's just pathetic. I bet a lot of people can second that.
So I bet you're wondering who I am? Well, that's something for me to know for you to shut your trap about, hahahahahahaa.
From,
A knowing super-awesome Mafioso.
…
Dear Well I Don’t Like Your Fucking Attitude,
Regardless of whether you like me, or anyone else on this damn thing, none of my concern. As for using ‘bastardly’ against you, there’s nothing that I could do to make you look bad-you kind of already look like a moron, asshole.
Well good, because I wouldn’t clean up my mouth for you, fucktard. As for ‘childish’, I think you should go look it up in the dictionary, because the last time I checked, trying to throw insults back wasn’t ‘mature’. What I call people doesn’t determine my age.
And, who the fuck are you to be telling me how to be a ‘proper’ right hand man? I bet you don’t even know how to find your way to a bathroom in a grocery store. Don’t you say one damn thing about the Tenth-I’ll come over there and blow your hands the hell off.
Am I wondering? HELL. NO. For all I care, you can go walk into the Varia’s headquarters and get your nuts blown off by Xanxus, and I hate the bastard.
…
59-san
Hi, just dropping a letter to say thank you for the info and number. I'm sure they'll be quite useful. :D Huh, am I the first person to actually WRITE thank you? Eh, who knows...
As for your question, only bastards who think like the bastard I'm after would understand why he did what he did, so it being you don't understand means you're not like him. Yay!
Once again, thank you very much!
~From "Yes, I enjoy my insanity"
…
Dear It’s About Damn Time,
Well, at least someone has some decency around here. I think you just might be the first one, actually.
Bastards like that were born spineless.
…
Beloved Hayato-chan,
I just wanted to know who did you have your first kiss with? I wished it had been with me though. Can't wait for your trashing words, they’re like wine to me!
P.s Wish you and Tsuna the best of luck, and I dig the hairdo as well!
~UMA’s are Real~
…
Dear Mind Your Own Fucking Business,
As the address says, myofb. If I knew who you were, I’d make your first kiss with my fist. Or dynamite. Make your choice.
Also, why is your postscript the only damn normal thing in your message?
…
Dear 59-san,
What is the best way to position dynamite so I can blow up this snobby show off?
~Wafia Primo Jen-chan
…
Dear Smart Cookie,
Up his ass.
…
Dear Mr 59
Thank You For your Advice. U R So Cool. I Want To Kidnap Dis Relly Hot Guy.
Any Ideas On How?11!
…
Dear If I Get A Message From You One More Fucking Time,
I refuse to dignify this with a proper response. For God’s sake, how hard is it to spell words from fucking KINDERGARTEN?!
…
Dear 59,
Well this is nostalgic.
Taking a chance to write this since Lambo, being the idiot he usually is, accidentally (debatable) set off that lovely bazooka of his again. A note from the future, never ever mention the word [encoding error] to him.
Regards,
-Future you.
…
Gokudera took a long time to pause and re-read that one, only shaking his head. He didn’t bother questioning the impossible any more, seeing as his life was one big compilation of such ‘insanity’.
…
Dear Me,
God, thank you. However, how in the seven hells do you expect ourself to remember that ten years from now?
…I’ll leave a note for myself. Thanks.
…
Dear 59-kun,
I care about finding out about who you'd go for outside of the ‘Tenth’. What do you like in a guy anyway? (Other than the ‘Tenth’, because he does not count.) And I honestly think you are very confused, because I saw what happened outside of your apartment. That boy who left looked rather hurt.
…
Now this message left Gokudera feeling a little violated. Although in retrospect, he supposed one of his neighbors had probably heard the commotion, found out about this, and was inquiring about such things.
With a long sigh, he settled for replying to it.
…
Dear Who Knows, Honestly,
I just…kind, patient, and accepting, I guess. But it’s more than that…the Tenth is just so special. As for my confusion, you aren’t fucking helping things. My head’s already screwed over because of a certain idiot’s actions.
But screw him anyways. It’s his fault.
…
Leaning back and looking at his burned out stub of a cigarette, he coughed briefly. From out of his window, he could see the bleeding sunrise, and he cradled his head in his hands.
Now I don’t know what to fucking think.
LONG CUT IS LONG
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Letter Page!
Other people! Sorry this took so long. :/ Is lazy. P: Also! If you'd like to send me a letter, drop it HERE! :D
Dear 59-kun
Climatically
When he found his eyes tired, but still open, at something close to four in the morning, he was unbelievably annoyed. He found himself destroying his pillows, and quickly following that, the nearest table. Unable to sleep again, thanks to the stupid baseball freak’s words echoing in his ears, he grabbed a cigarette from the bedside, shoved it in his mouth, and fumbled for his lighter. After the nicotine was slowly entering his lungs, he let out a sigh and watched the puffs cloud around his green eyes. Then he turned on his computer and sat down to finish reading some more messages on his advice column-blog-thing.
…
Dear Hayato,
I baked you cake to celebrate you finally confessing. Come over and we can share it with Reborn~ Do you think I should feed it to him? And hurry up, the kids are getting restless and want to eat it.
P.s: Stop being mean to people who just want advice, Or I'll personally go over there and stuff the cake in your face.
~Your Loving Sister
…
Dear How In The Hell Did You Even…Never Mind,
How did you find this, actually? …Never mind, Reborn-san told you. As for my confessing-does he know all of my business?! IS NOTHING SACRED?
As for your cake…how about a big fat damn no. I have no interest in, you know, dying, before I get an answer.
…
Dear 59-kun:
There is this person recently who saved my live and I really like the person a lot. But he is quite obsessed with harming another person, who is my boss, and I respect him a lot. What do you think I should do?
ChocoSkull
…
Dear What Is This I Don’t Even,
That sounds fucked up. You should go piss on him, and tell him that your job is more important than his petty grudge, or whatever the hell his beef is.
…
Dear 59-san,
I think there's something living in a certain piece of jewelry I own, and sometimes I get the feeling it's watching me or whispering suggestive things to me inside my head. I don't mind talking with people inside my head sometimes, but I'm starting to fear for my girlish virtue. What should I do?
-ixgxaxn
…
Dear Talks to Inanimate Objects,
It’s probably haunted, that’s what! Go consult a spiritual medium, and get that taken care of. Poltergeists can get to be fucking annoying if you keep ignoring them.
…
Dear 59-kun,
I think you should soften down on the anger replies. I worry about your blood pressure levels! I wouldn’t want you to die on me.
~dame
…
Dear Don’t I Know You?
I…what do you care about my blood pressure levels? I’m perfectly healthy, thanks.
I have someone to protect! I refuse to die unless it’s in the midst of protecting them.
…
I really don't like you 59-pyon,
But Hi anyway. Do you know why letters keep coming in? Because people love you. People LOVE how you reply to rudely and bastardly, if that's a word. I bet it's not, but don't use it against me because it would just show how idiotic you are because you can't use anything other than that against me, you know.
I don't care if you call me names, because I've been called names a lot of times. And to be honest, I think name calling is just childish. I suggest you grow up and start behaving like a proper right-hand man to your 'almighty god' Sawada Tsunayoshi. Maybe he would grow to become a great leader, but right now he's just pathetic. I bet a lot of people can second that.
So I bet you're wondering who I am? Well, that's something for me to know for you to shut your trap about, hahahahahahaa.
From,
A knowing super-awesome Mafioso.
…
Dear Well I Don’t Like Your Fucking Attitude,
Regardless of whether you like me, or anyone else on this damn thing, none of my concern. As for using ‘bastardly’ against you, there’s nothing that I could do to make you look bad-you kind of already look like a moron, asshole.
Well good, because I wouldn’t clean up my mouth for you, fucktard. As for ‘childish’, I think you should go look it up in the dictionary, because the last time I checked, trying to throw insults back wasn’t ‘mature’. What I call people doesn’t determine my age.
And, who the fuck are you to be telling me how to be a ‘proper’ right hand man? I bet you don’t even know how to find your way to a bathroom in a grocery store. Don’t you say one damn thing about the Tenth-I’ll come over there and blow your hands the hell off.
Am I wondering? HELL. NO. For all I care, you can go walk into the Varia’s headquarters and get your nuts blown off by Xanxus, and I hate the bastard.
…
59-san
Hi, just dropping a letter to say thank you for the info and number. I'm sure they'll be quite useful. :D Huh, am I the first person to actually WRITE thank you? Eh, who knows...
As for your question, only bastards who think like the bastard I'm after would understand why he did what he did, so it being you don't understand means you're not like him. Yay!
Once again, thank you very much!
~From "Yes, I enjoy my insanity"
…
Dear It’s About Damn Time,
Well, at least someone has some decency around here. I think you just might be the first one, actually.
Bastards like that were born spineless.
…
Beloved Hayato-chan,
I just wanted to know who did you have your first kiss with? I wished it had been with me though. Can't wait for your trashing words, they’re like wine to me!
P.s Wish you and Tsuna the best of luck, and I dig the hairdo as well!
~UMA’s are Real~
…
Dear Mind Your Own Fucking Business,
As the address says, myofb. If I knew who you were, I’d make your first kiss with my fist. Or dynamite. Make your choice.
Also, why is your postscript the only damn normal thing in your message?
…
Dear 59-san,
What is the best way to position dynamite so I can blow up this snobby show off?
~Wafia Primo Jen-chan
…
Dear Smart Cookie,
Up his ass.
…
Dear Mr 59
Thank You For your Advice. U R So Cool. I Want To Kidnap Dis Relly Hot Guy.
Any Ideas On How?11!
…
Dear If I Get A Message From You One More Fucking Time,
I refuse to dignify this with a proper response. For God’s sake, how hard is it to spell words from fucking KINDERGARTEN?!
…
Dear 59,
Well this is nostalgic.
Taking a chance to write this since Lambo, being the idiot he usually is, accidentally (debatable) set off that lovely bazooka of his again. A note from the future, never ever mention the word [encoding error] to him.
Regards,
-Future you.
…
Gokudera took a long time to pause and re-read that one, only shaking his head. He didn’t bother questioning the impossible any more, seeing as his life was one big compilation of such ‘insanity’.
…
Dear Me,
God, thank you. However, how in the seven hells do you expect ourself to remember that ten years from now?
…I’ll leave a note for myself. Thanks.
…
Dear 59-kun,
I care about finding out about who you'd go for outside of the ‘Tenth’. What do you like in a guy anyway? (Other than the ‘Tenth’, because he does not count.) And I honestly think you are very confused, because I saw what happened outside of your apartment. That boy who left looked rather hurt.
…
Now this message left Gokudera feeling a little violated. Although in retrospect, he supposed one of his neighbors had probably heard the commotion, found out about this, and was inquiring about such things.
With a long sigh, he settled for replying to it.
…
Dear Who Knows, Honestly,
I just…kind, patient, and accepting, I guess. But it’s more than that…the Tenth is just so special. As for my confusion, you aren’t fucking helping things. My head’s already screwed over because of a certain idiot’s actions.
But screw him anyways. It’s his fault.
…
Leaning back and looking at his burned out stub of a cigarette, he coughed briefly. From out of his window, he could see the bleeding sunrise, and he cradled his head in his hands.
Now I don’t know what to fucking think.
LONG CUT IS LONG
previous | next
ff.net
Letter Page!