After Cassie Ran Out of the Diner
This one is for June.
An excerpt from "My Life" by Ennis Del Mar as told to Soulan and annotated by Jack Twist.
I couldn't take another bite of pie. I thought about all the time she'd invested in me and realized that she really had believed in what we had. I think I'd tried to believe, but deep down I'd known that I would cut her loose one day. I still wish I'd done it with more dignity, that I hadn't been such a coward.1 I didn't think about how she must have been feeling when I ignored her messages; I simply wanted to put her behind me and was just surprised that she was so persistent. And I never thought she'd cry over me. When I saw that tear, I knew that only one person in my world understood me.2 I stared at the tabletop for a long time, sensing people come and go, and felt creep through me the fear that I'd finally exhausted the vein of understanding I'd been mining in Jack's heart for so many years.3
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1 It would a been so easy for Ennis to quit me the way he dumped that gal. He could a just sent a card sayin there'd be no more fishin trips. He could a just not showed up. He didn't have no phone and I didnt know where he worked. But he never did and I never once feared he would, even tho once in a while I almost wished for it.
2 Soon as he mentioned her I knew by the way he talked bout her that she wasn't important. Knew I had a come back with somethin to show I wasn't savin it up for months since I told him the truth bout me and Lureen. Good thing I'd never told him any stories bout Lashawn and her mouth or he'd a known right away I was tellin a wopper.
3 That is just your fancy way a sayin he knew I was at the end a my rope.