[01/01] Comeback
title. Comeback
pairing. akame (je)
rating. pg
summary. five scenes of jin and kame. two right before jin goes to LA. three in the months after he comes back.
author’s note. i write a disgusting amount of akame and a disgusting amount of akame-after-jin's-comeback. i need to branch out. umm. later. more yakuza to come. happy new year! i meant to post this tomorrow but uhhh, i'll either be in a lot of trouble or not lucid! anyway, i've been writing fic for ~a year now and you've all been great to me! so thanks. a lot. i'm surprised i've been writing for this fandom so long. :x
word count. 01950
one.
"I don't understand you," Jin admits. It is already known, simply unsaid, usually, but today he says it to Kame's face. "I try hard, but I can't."
"I know," Kame says, and doesn't offer more.
"We're still friends though," Jin says, uncertainly, like he's not quite sure if Kame believes the statement.
"Not like then, though." And Jin thinks of Okinawa. Jin thinks back to their early Junior days, when Kame threw himself upon Jin and Jin accepted him with wide, open arms.
"We do our best," Jin says, finally. "We try our best," he says, and sucks in a breath. "I'm going to LA."
two.
He remembers it, crystal clear. It is the last memory he has of Japan, because everything after that is blurry and hazy.
Kame had been angry, so angry. Jin could tell from the way his shoulders quivered, from the tension in his balled fists. Kame’s eyes narrowed to slits and his teeth held back a flood of venomous words.
After several moments of shock, it took several more moments of recovery for Kame to speak. His words were very even and calm and controlled, and he said that he respected Jin's wishes and understood Jin's decisions. Then, after empty practiced laughter, "Man, you have balls to leave the agency for six months."
"I knew you'd understand," Jin said, after a small smile. But he wasn't sure if he believed it.
There was more silence after that, silence before Kame finally asked, "But why?" He reached for Jin's forearm, gripped it hard enough to bruise. "Why?" he whispered, and his widened eyes looked young and scared and offended. Like he was again fifteen and Ryo had just called him ugly.
When Jin steps back into Japan after six months abroad, that memory is the first that comes to mind. He does not think of homecooked meals or Pi or his own face returning to the spotlight. He thinks of Kame, miserable-looking and near tears, holding onto Jin like he is a lifeline.
three.
Kame is Jin's constant. He is always there, hovering in the background like an old photograph beneath a layer of dust on the bureau. It feels empty without Kame, and though the emptiness is felt instantly, the cause takes a very long time to pinpoint.
Jin sees KAT-TUN for the first time since his return at the press conference. They don't get much chance to speak beforehand, but afterwards, they go to Jimusho Headquarters and are left alone in one of the many conference rooms.
Jin speaks animatedly to Ueda, and Junno periodically interrupts with bad puns using English words. Koki attempts to ignore Jin, but even he is drawn in when Maru asks if all the chicks there actually have huge tits and long blonde hair. Kame doesn't say much, but Jin doesn't think much of it because he is there, which means that he doesn't hate Jin so much that he can't stand to look at his face.
But Jin searches for his eyes just to make sure, and it feels good when Kame looks at him instead of turning away.
But, then, he looks to Kame in the middle of his ramen-shop story, and Kame is nowhere to be found. Jin feels like he did a lot of the time in LA, far from home and kind of confused.
four.
They are all allowed to leave except Jin, who spends a harrowing hour and a half in Mary's office. He is leaving and on his ways to the elevators when he sees Kame sitting on a bench with his elbows on his knees and cheeks in his hands. His eyes are closed.
"She's not busy right now," Jin says, and Kame's eyes open slowly. He stands and straightens himself. Jin continues toward the elevators, and he has pressed the 'down' button and is waiting when he hears a voice from down the empty hall.
"It's not that."
Jin turns and he sees Kame standing at the end of the hall. Kame looking tired, kind of like how he looked in New York City.
"It's not that," Kame repeats when he is by Jin's side, and he shoves his hands into his pockets and waits for the elevator.
"Then what?" Jin asks after a few silent moments. "LA didn't teach me to read minds." He laughs and Kame looks up at Jin and Jin looks down at Kame. He looks young again for some reason that Jin doesn't understand.
"Good." Kame smiles.
"Huh?" The elevator finally comes, and they enter together. "Why are you here, then?" He asks again.
Kame ignores him. "Did you get what you wanted in LA?" And Jin is reminded of their last one-on-one meeting. When Kame held onto him and refused to let go.
"Ah," Jin replies. "Maybe," he says.
"You are still Akanishi Jin," Kame says, and he sounds relieved. "I thought you'd come back American, I thought you'd come back with amnesia."
"What?" Jin laughs.
"I thought you'd forget-"
"-KAT-TUN? Japan? My friends?"
"Me," Kame says, and the elevators open on the ground floor. "I have to go to an interview now," he says. "I'm late." He exits before Jin and begins to walk away, sunglasses on and hat pulled low. "I'll teach you the choreography for the concerts," he calls back, raises one hand in a farewell.
Jin watches him, tries to process everything. Kame is cryptic like a girl. Jin cups his hands around his mouth and tries to say something, but the words won't come.
I still don't understand you.
But Kame's already gone.
He still doesn't understand Kame, but he is Kame. Jin needs him around.
five.
"Thank you for helping me," Jin says. He has been working with the choreographers, but they get paid by the hour. Kame helps him fill in a lot of the gaps.
Kame shrugs and tosses him a water bottle. "I said I would, didn't I?"
"Ah," Jin says. "Press conference day, right?"
"Right," Kame says. "Now, Peak-from the top."
"Again? Seriously, Kame-"
"Again," Kame says, definitively. "I'll buy dinner tonight." He smiles.
Jin hadn't been aware that they were going to eat together. "All right," he says, and only makes two mistakes.
---
Jin misses Kame. Jin used to think that he only missed Kazuya, the little, nervous junior who stuck to him like glue. But now, he thinks, he just misses Kame. Cute, tiny Kazuya or stressed, mature Kamenashi. They are two facets of the same person, because some things don't change, like Kame's need for approval or his carefully chosen words.
"I miss being best friends," Jin says wistfully at dinner. They've both showered and their hair is wet and unkempt. Kame hides his under a cap, but Jin's threatens to engulf his entire head if the humidity increases anymore.
"With who?" Kame asks, and hisses. The ramen is very hot.
Jin suddenly feels distressed. "Um," he says.
Kame watches Jin as he blows cold air on a spoonful of broth. He looks concerned. "Well?"
"You," Jin says quickly, like a gust of wind, and his eyes drop to his bowl. He hears Kame's spoon clack against his teeth, hears him slurp the soup and shift in his seat.
"Ah," Kame says. "You thought-"
Jin wants to stop this conversation right now, but he forces himself to keep going. "Yeah, you know, then," he says.
Kame laughs and Jin wants to sink into the ground. "Really?" He asks, and sounds incredulous. "I always thought-" He pauses, sucks in a breath. "I always thought that was one-sided. On my part."
"Hm?" Jin's head snaps up, but Kame's eyes look at the table. "I definitely told you that we were best friends," he says.
"You were friends with everyone," Kame says, slowly, carefully, quietly. "I never took you seriously."
"Oh," Jin says. "Well, we were."
"We were," Kame says.
---
Over the period of time that Kame helps Jin with his choreography, the two talk a lot. They talk the most that they've talked in a long time. They reminisce, and Jin finds that they have a lot of misunderstandings. They have a tendency to interpret things differently. Jin has a habit of pushing forward his own opinion while Kame keeps his to himself unless he's absolutely sure about it.
---
"When did you hate me most?" Kame asks. "I won't get angry," he says, and Jin knows that he is telling the truth.
Jin isn't really sure. It was a falling out at first, a gradual process. They grew up and apart, and before he knew it, Jin wasn't aware of Kame's most recent cell phone number.
"Seishun Amigo," Jin says, slowly, carefully, like Kame.
"You weren't angry at Pi, then," Kame says it like it's incredibly unfair. It is.
"I never said anything though," Jin says earnestly. He'd attempted to keep it inside. "I'm glad I didn't. I didn't know the circumstances, then."
"Ah," Kame says.
"When did you hate me most?" Jin dares to ask.
"When you left," Kame says. "But I never said anything. I only asked you why."
"Circumstances," Jin answers. He hadn't before.
"Ah," Kame replies.
Finally, "Those six months were hard."
"Because you were away from everything familiar? Japan? Family?"
"Something like that," Jin says, and his stomach knots when Kame smiles at him.
"Stupid." Kame laughs.
"You," Jin says.
"Bakanishi," Kame says, and Jin hasn't heard that from his lips in a long time. "I'm not the stupid one."
That's not what Jin means. But Kame wouldn't know that.
---
"We've never gotten drunk together before," Kame says.
"Not legally," Jin reminds him.
"Shut up. Does your brother still have the pictures?"
Jin laughs. "Maybe."
Kame giggles.
Like a girl. High and-
"I missed you a lot in LA," Jin says, and Kame's smile fades.
"Why?"
"Not used to not having you around."
"We didn't talk very much before you left. And we were busy. I never saw you much-"
"It's not that," Jin says. His eyebrows furrow and he runs his hands through his hair.
"Then-"
"I don't know. I just wanted you there."
"You wanted me to be there, or-"
"I don't know." Jin doesn't understand what he means himself, sometimes.
---
Kame makes him feel young. Not the boyish, immature kind of young that he feels with Yamapi, but something more innocent. It's refreshing.
---
Kame finally finishes teaching him choreography. Jin whoops in happiness, jumps in the air as he finishes a dance almost-impeccably. He rushes to Kame and grabs him round the shoulders, presses against him and feels those small hands on his shoulder blades. Kame laughs into his neck and Jin grins into his hair.
"Thank you," Jin says. "Thank you. Thank you. For everything," he says, and it's not limited to the choreography.
"No problem," Kame says.
Jin's arms slacken, but Kame doesn't let go. Jin feels Kame press his face harder into his neck, and he's not sure if the wetness is because of sweat or because of tears.
"Kame?"
"Hold on," Kame breathes, and Jin reaches one hand up to his hair. "Hold on, before you go."
"You say it like I'm leaving Japan again." Jin laughs.
"Before you go to the Us before you left," Kame explains. "To our misunderstandings. To the times when we avoided each other's eyes, to when we weren't friends."
"It's not that," Jin says.
"So what is it?" Kame asks, and he laughs.
"I don't know," Jin says.
"Ah," Kame replies, and Jin squirms when he feels hot air on his neck, on his collar bone.
idk 2007.09.?? → 2007.09.21