LJ Idol Week 4, Topic: “Nobody can ride your back if your back's not bent”
This is not a story about standing up for oneself. This is not a story of breaking shackles and gaining freedom. This is more a story about being ridden. Perhaps someday I'll stand up.....
~*~
Unbending one's back is hard when one has a low self esteem and an accompanying anxiety disorder.
Unbending one's back is difficult when one has always bent over backwards to help others and to not rock the boat.
Unbending one's back is impossible when one feels like they carry the weight of the world on their shoulders.
~*~
I have FMLA* granted to me at work due to my anxiety disorder. This seems to infuriate my Boss because I can take time off and they can't write me up for taking that time. So they have found a way to penalize me, without writing me up.
But first, a little background.....
I work as a housekeeper in a large hospital, in a medium size town. It's not a glamorous job, it's not a great job, and it's not generally well thought of. But it's a NEEDED job. You NEED to have someone come into the empty rooms to clean them. And clean them well. These people are SICK and the last thing you want is a dirty room for your immune compromised family member or yourself.
I'm working on my 4th year at this job and I'll be the first to tell you that being appreciated is not one of the perks you get. We do have a whole week dedicated to our department, but other than the one dinner they serve us for free and the token gift we get, I can promise you that Housekeeping week tends to pass like any other week. Very little thanks involved. So much so that when I am thanked by a nurse or a tech for the work I've done, it's strikes me as odd and feels like they are speaking a foreign language. You do not work in Housekeeping for accolade and glory.
~*~
In housekeeping there are usually jobs that no one wants to do. Areas that get messier than others. Places where dealing with the gross bits of human existence is more prevalent. One of those places is the ER. Most of the time you're just cleaning up a mildly dirty room. Removing used linen, wiping down the gurney, maybe emptying the trash. Occasionally you've got to deal with urine.
And then there's the Trauma rooms. I'll spare you the gory details of what we find, when the action is over and the patient is gone. But suffice it to say it's gross. Sometimes VERY gross.
The ER is also a lot of work. Turnover of rooms can come very quickly, if the patient isn't terribly sick. And there are 25 beds in the ER to get dirty. Add to this 7.5 hours of standing on your feet and the ER can leave one exhausted at the end of a shift.
No one really likes to work in the ER. Our Supervisor tends to rotate us around so that no one works too many shifts in the ER back to back.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I've been assigned there for over 20 shifts straight.
We're pretty sure it's due to the FMLA I've been able to take. We being my coworkers and I. Our management is sneaky like that. Which is sad. I'm used to jobs where you could trust your upper management to have your back on almost anything. But not here.
The first 7 or 8 shifts I was angry. SO ANGRY. I hated working in the ER, hated everything about it. I railed against the unfairness of it all. I went home in tears nightly. But I had a feeling that they were looking for me to come to them, perhaps begging and crawling, to be taken out of the ER and returned to my regular schedule. And that I could not do.
But after 23 shifts or so, I've found myself adapting to it. My feet no longer hurt as much, the work doesn't seem as hectic and rushed, the nurses and techs there actually SPEAK to me.
Here's a secret.....it's not so bad, not really. My supervisors pretty much leave me alone, I see them at 3 and at 11:30 when I leave. And that's it. I've spoken maybe 10 words to them in this entire time. And it sorta feels good to have disappointed them. And despite their efforts, I still use my FMLA time if I need to.
After all, what are they gonna do to me? Put me in the ER?
Image description: An ER trauma room.
*The Family and Medical Leave Act of 1993 (FMLA) is a United States federal law requiring covered employers to provide employees job-protected and unpaid leave for qualified medical and family reasons. Qualified medical and family reasons include: personal or family illness, family military leave, pregnancy, adoption, or the foster care placement of a child.[1] The FMLA is administered by the Wage and Hour Division of the United States Department of Labor.
~*~
Unbending one's back is hard when one has a low self esteem and an accompanying anxiety disorder.
Unbending one's back is difficult when one has always bent over backwards to help others and to not rock the boat.
Unbending one's back is impossible when one feels like they carry the weight of the world on their shoulders.
~*~
I have FMLA* granted to me at work due to my anxiety disorder. This seems to infuriate my Boss because I can take time off and they can't write me up for taking that time. So they have found a way to penalize me, without writing me up.
But first, a little background.....
I work as a housekeeper in a large hospital, in a medium size town. It's not a glamorous job, it's not a great job, and it's not generally well thought of. But it's a NEEDED job. You NEED to have someone come into the empty rooms to clean them. And clean them well. These people are SICK and the last thing you want is a dirty room for your immune compromised family member or yourself.
I'm working on my 4th year at this job and I'll be the first to tell you that being appreciated is not one of the perks you get. We do have a whole week dedicated to our department, but other than the one dinner they serve us for free and the token gift we get, I can promise you that Housekeeping week tends to pass like any other week. Very little thanks involved. So much so that when I am thanked by a nurse or a tech for the work I've done, it's strikes me as odd and feels like they are speaking a foreign language. You do not work in Housekeeping for accolade and glory.
~*~
In housekeeping there are usually jobs that no one wants to do. Areas that get messier than others. Places where dealing with the gross bits of human existence is more prevalent. One of those places is the ER. Most of the time you're just cleaning up a mildly dirty room. Removing used linen, wiping down the gurney, maybe emptying the trash. Occasionally you've got to deal with urine.
And then there's the Trauma rooms. I'll spare you the gory details of what we find, when the action is over and the patient is gone. But suffice it to say it's gross. Sometimes VERY gross.
The ER is also a lot of work. Turnover of rooms can come very quickly, if the patient isn't terribly sick. And there are 25 beds in the ER to get dirty. Add to this 7.5 hours of standing on your feet and the ER can leave one exhausted at the end of a shift.
No one really likes to work in the ER. Our Supervisor tends to rotate us around so that no one works too many shifts in the ER back to back.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I've been assigned there for over 20 shifts straight.
We're pretty sure it's due to the FMLA I've been able to take. We being my coworkers and I. Our management is sneaky like that. Which is sad. I'm used to jobs where you could trust your upper management to have your back on almost anything. But not here.
The first 7 or 8 shifts I was angry. SO ANGRY. I hated working in the ER, hated everything about it. I railed against the unfairness of it all. I went home in tears nightly. But I had a feeling that they were looking for me to come to them, perhaps begging and crawling, to be taken out of the ER and returned to my regular schedule. And that I could not do.
But after 23 shifts or so, I've found myself adapting to it. My feet no longer hurt as much, the work doesn't seem as hectic and rushed, the nurses and techs there actually SPEAK to me.
Here's a secret.....it's not so bad, not really. My supervisors pretty much leave me alone, I see them at 3 and at 11:30 when I leave. And that's it. I've spoken maybe 10 words to them in this entire time. And it sorta feels good to have disappointed them. And despite their efforts, I still use my FMLA time if I need to.
After all, what are they gonna do to me? Put me in the ER?
Image description: An ER trauma room.
*The Family and Medical Leave Act of 1993 (FMLA) is a United States federal law requiring covered employers to provide employees job-protected and unpaid leave for qualified medical and family reasons. Qualified medical and family reasons include: personal or family illness, family military leave, pregnancy, adoption, or the foster care placement of a child.[1] The FMLA is administered by the Wage and Hour Division of the United States Department of Labor.