Sleepless (SA)
Last one... and bed time!
Title: Sleepless
Author: sophie_03
Warnings: none.
Pairing/s: none/unspecified.
Disclaimer: not true, don't own them, etc.
Dedication: Jen, again, for being so lovely
Summary: Getting to sleep is hard sometimes... especially when you're feeling so alone and the rain is hitting the window, harder and harder.
Notes: like this one. comments please. and lyrics are from Chills in the Evening -V/Mcfly
Sleepless
You know that I can’t sleep coz I’m terrified
It feels like I’m falling down really fast inside
And I’m wishing the night away
The wind was howling outside. The rain hit the glass of the window with a frightening clatter, unrelenting.
He was alone tonight, no arms wrapped around him, comforting him, nobody kisses his neck gently encouraging him to fall back to sleep, instead of sitting up right in that rigid position, with his arms clamped round his knees and his face blank and listening. The duvet was wrapped tightly around him, and he was sat in the middle of the huge double bed, feeling somehow safer there.
The room seemed much larger too, in the dark, in the middle of the night, with only the wailing wind outside for company.
Trying to get to sleep again he knew would be impossible. He’d slept, briefly, only to be woken by the unforgiving storm outside, which insisted on battling on. He shivered slightly and pulled the duvet closer. Just that feeling was reassuring.
As he sat there his eyes flickered shut, showing him how tired he was, but his brain wasn’t going to let his body relax. He stared into the darkness again, still feeling this irrational fear that wouldn’t let him sleep.
Unable to find anything reassuring to relax his brain, he thought over instead that evening. But that hurt. It had been lonely. One of those evenings, that had got dark too quickly, leaving everything lying in the shadows, making everything familiar that little more sinister than usual. Even the sounds of a crappy film on the TV couldn’t shake unsettling thoughts from his mind. Always there, lurking at the back, waiting to come back and laugh at him as he shrank away into his own shadow and nightmares. He hadn’t gone to bed early, knowing he wouldn’t sleep, but then he found he couldn’t stay awake any longer. So why was he now sitting there awake?
He didn’t want to move, not even to turn the light on - would that help? He wasn’t sure. His body was too numb to move… but it was only a few inches… and then only a few steps and he could sit on the sofa, with the TV blaring, masking the sounds of the storm outside. Making him forget.
Why was he so afraid? He tried to scorn himself, but still, he felt that fear. Being alone didn’t help. He had grown so used to having someone around, sharing a room, a house with someone that the feeling of the huge deserted building frightened him. he liked - needed - human company.
The rain persisted. Why did it do this? On and on it went. The clock on the table continued to flash its digits bright red, vivid in the darkness. He didn’t stare at them because that made it worse, watching the minutes disappear into the night.
He was numb now. He really felt he couldn’t move again. He wanted to, to change his position and kill the aches he felt but he couldn’t. It would feel so much better he knew.
Slowly he unfurled himself, wincing at the pain, feeling the cold sheets, making him shiver at the unexpected chill.
That was better.
He moved back, so he could lie his head on the pillow again, and lay on his side, staring into the darkness engulfing him still. The same feelings just wouldn’t stop. Why couldn’t he imagine himself some place else, somewhere else he wanted to?
Then he would forget this and fall asleep… deep into the night, far away from this lonely bed… why couldn’t sleep just overcome him, naturally, and easily?
He lay there, the duvet heaped upon him, covering him, keeping him safe.
And he lay, eyes open for a while, until they flickered shut.
The doorbell jerked him awake and he stared round in confusion. He lay there, his eyes accustoming to the brightness again.
The room was flooded with light, everything looked and felt so much more human now. It was day time. Somewhere in those dark hours he had drifted off.
He was exhausted and his head ached.
The doorbell was ringing.
He pushed himself out of bed picking a hoodie off the floor to cover his body and made his way to the door.
And when the morning did come everything looked so much better, and the strange fears of the night before were gone, so easily as if it hadn’t ever happened.
Just another nights bad sleep he thought to himself. A bad memory. Those moments came back to him, as if they of another person, a nightmare or a bad film that he had stumbled upon and felt part of - not him. Yet it had been him.
Even the carpet under his feet felt different and there was no one hiding in the shadows, because there were no shadows to be afraid of, not now. Not now the night had disappeared into the past and the far-gone memory of that darkness. He was alright now; and he would be okay. Of course he knew that, because now, even though he remembered that loneliness, that terror, he felt like life would be alright after all. He had made it through another night. Yet he still couldn’t shake that feeling away.
The chills in the evening, they won’t go away
Title: Sleepless
Author: sophie_03
Warnings: none.
Pairing/s: none/unspecified.
Disclaimer: not true, don't own them, etc.
Dedication: Jen, again, for being so lovely
Summary: Getting to sleep is hard sometimes... especially when you're feeling so alone and the rain is hitting the window, harder and harder.
Notes: like this one. comments please. and lyrics are from Chills in the Evening -V/Mcfly
Sleepless
You know that I can’t sleep coz I’m terrified
It feels like I’m falling down really fast inside
And I’m wishing the night away
The wind was howling outside. The rain hit the glass of the window with a frightening clatter, unrelenting.
He was alone tonight, no arms wrapped around him, comforting him, nobody kisses his neck gently encouraging him to fall back to sleep, instead of sitting up right in that rigid position, with his arms clamped round his knees and his face blank and listening. The duvet was wrapped tightly around him, and he was sat in the middle of the huge double bed, feeling somehow safer there.
The room seemed much larger too, in the dark, in the middle of the night, with only the wailing wind outside for company.
Trying to get to sleep again he knew would be impossible. He’d slept, briefly, only to be woken by the unforgiving storm outside, which insisted on battling on. He shivered slightly and pulled the duvet closer. Just that feeling was reassuring.
As he sat there his eyes flickered shut, showing him how tired he was, but his brain wasn’t going to let his body relax. He stared into the darkness again, still feeling this irrational fear that wouldn’t let him sleep.
Unable to find anything reassuring to relax his brain, he thought over instead that evening. But that hurt. It had been lonely. One of those evenings, that had got dark too quickly, leaving everything lying in the shadows, making everything familiar that little more sinister than usual. Even the sounds of a crappy film on the TV couldn’t shake unsettling thoughts from his mind. Always there, lurking at the back, waiting to come back and laugh at him as he shrank away into his own shadow and nightmares. He hadn’t gone to bed early, knowing he wouldn’t sleep, but then he found he couldn’t stay awake any longer. So why was he now sitting there awake?
He didn’t want to move, not even to turn the light on - would that help? He wasn’t sure. His body was too numb to move… but it was only a few inches… and then only a few steps and he could sit on the sofa, with the TV blaring, masking the sounds of the storm outside. Making him forget.
Why was he so afraid? He tried to scorn himself, but still, he felt that fear. Being alone didn’t help. He had grown so used to having someone around, sharing a room, a house with someone that the feeling of the huge deserted building frightened him. he liked - needed - human company.
The rain persisted. Why did it do this? On and on it went. The clock on the table continued to flash its digits bright red, vivid in the darkness. He didn’t stare at them because that made it worse, watching the minutes disappear into the night.
He was numb now. He really felt he couldn’t move again. He wanted to, to change his position and kill the aches he felt but he couldn’t. It would feel so much better he knew.
Slowly he unfurled himself, wincing at the pain, feeling the cold sheets, making him shiver at the unexpected chill.
That was better.
He moved back, so he could lie his head on the pillow again, and lay on his side, staring into the darkness engulfing him still. The same feelings just wouldn’t stop. Why couldn’t he imagine himself some place else, somewhere else he wanted to?
Then he would forget this and fall asleep… deep into the night, far away from this lonely bed… why couldn’t sleep just overcome him, naturally, and easily?
He lay there, the duvet heaped upon him, covering him, keeping him safe.
And he lay, eyes open for a while, until they flickered shut.
The doorbell jerked him awake and he stared round in confusion. He lay there, his eyes accustoming to the brightness again.
The room was flooded with light, everything looked and felt so much more human now. It was day time. Somewhere in those dark hours he had drifted off.
He was exhausted and his head ached.
The doorbell was ringing.
He pushed himself out of bed picking a hoodie off the floor to cover his body and made his way to the door.
And when the morning did come everything looked so much better, and the strange fears of the night before were gone, so easily as if it hadn’t ever happened.
Just another nights bad sleep he thought to himself. A bad memory. Those moments came back to him, as if they of another person, a nightmare or a bad film that he had stumbled upon and felt part of - not him. Yet it had been him.
Even the carpet under his feet felt different and there was no one hiding in the shadows, because there were no shadows to be afraid of, not now. Not now the night had disappeared into the past and the far-gone memory of that darkness. He was alright now; and he would be okay. Of course he knew that, because now, even though he remembered that loneliness, that terror, he felt like life would be alright after all. He had made it through another night. Yet he still couldn’t shake that feeling away.
The chills in the evening, they won’t go away