Letting Go (SA)
Title: Letting Go
Author: sophie_03
Warnings: slash.
Pairing/s: any. I wrote it with Pudd in mind, but it can be any.
Disclaimer: not true, don't own them etc.
Dedication: jen. And all my readers.
Summary: it's hard letting go of someone.
Notes: a/n song lyrics at start and end from What Good is Love? from Britannia High. don't own them either.
and its another quite short one.
Letting Go.
What good is love
When it goes and takes its toll on us
Is anybody out there
‘Do you have to go?’
‘I have to.’ But he faltered.
The other boy held onto his arms tighter.
‘So you don’t.’
‘I do. You know I do.’
He shook his head, but he was biting his lip as if he knew but he didn’t want to let go.
He didn’t want to acknowledge the truth because it hurt.
‘I’m sorry.’ He whispered for the hundredth time.
‘Please.’
This time he shook his head. It wasn’t the first time he’d heard the same plea. The grip on his arms was becoming tighter and tighter, as if, if he held on even tighter it would stop him leaving, keep him there, keep them both routed to the spot and stop time, completely. Both knew they couldn’t stop time, that they couldn’t pause it, but both hoped fervently that it would magically stop. If only they could… but then they would be there for the rest of their lives, not wanting to move time and that wouldn’t give either of them anything. They wouldn’t be able to move on with anything then, and wouldn’t that defeat the point? They both knew it.
If they never let go now there would never be a future, never be a future for them, and they were relying on that.
This was just a small glitch in it all.
Time would pass, and then they would be standing on the other side, and it would all be alright. Wouldn’t it?
‘I love you.’ He whispered desperately, as if that would change anything, nothing but their longing to stay; there in that moment - actually not in that moment, if anywhere this wouldn’t be happening, they wouldn’t be there, saying goodbye.
They were still hanging onto each other; but what was the point, when they knew, it would only be minutes until they were separated, and for how long, they didn’t know.
The world was lost around them. They had only eyes for each other as they stood there, staring into each other’s eyes.
‘I really am sorry; you know that?’
The words were whispered and gentle; but words that still wouldn’t change anything. They were just words, words that had been repeated, over and over; not just by them, but by generations of humans, trying to make up for all their failings and mistakes, even when they couldn’t. They had to try.
Neither wanted to let go. They couldn’t. Neither wanted to say the words, to say goodbye.
‘I love you too, you know. Don’t you forget it.’
‘I won’t.’
‘It won’t be long, one day, I’ll be back here, with you.’
Their grip was loosening. They didn’t want it to, but it had to.
One of them opened his mouth to speak, to just say bye but he couldn’t get the word out.
‘See you soon, yeah?’ The other said; telling himself to let go. But it was so hard, too hard. Why did it have to be so hard?
Yet they couldn’t stay like that forever; their hands were slipping away, they were losing each other.
‘See you then.’ He agreed, trying to smile. But it was too hard. It was fake, this smiling, this pretending that it would be alright; because both of them knew, somehow, that maybe it wouldn’t. they just didn’t know.
They had to hope.
That’s all they had.
As the taller boy finally let go, and turned his back, walking away, saying goodbye, the smaller, fragile boy who was left standing there, finally let the tears he had been holding back roll down his face, as he watched his life walk away from him.
He was left, standing there, so alone. Never had he been so lost in this world, so separated, just by barriers and fate. Such simple things. Or were they? They complicated everything, and he couldn’t cope with that.
He wouldn’t be able to let go, ever.
This hope was all he had left.
He waited until every possibility of him coming back had passed, and he knew, really, that this was it. He had to walk away, and start again. If he didn’t try, he would be waiting a long time.
And then he turned and walked away.
Hope you know
I hope you know
In spite of everything this world has put us through
I loved you
And still do
Author: sophie_03
Warnings: slash.
Pairing/s: any. I wrote it with Pudd in mind, but it can be any.
Disclaimer: not true, don't own them etc.
Dedication: jen. And all my readers.
Summary: it's hard letting go of someone.
Notes: a/n song lyrics at start and end from What Good is Love? from Britannia High. don't own them either.
and its another quite short one.
Letting Go.
What good is love
When it goes and takes its toll on us
Is anybody out there
‘Do you have to go?’
‘I have to.’ But he faltered.
The other boy held onto his arms tighter.
‘So you don’t.’
‘I do. You know I do.’
He shook his head, but he was biting his lip as if he knew but he didn’t want to let go.
He didn’t want to acknowledge the truth because it hurt.
‘I’m sorry.’ He whispered for the hundredth time.
‘Please.’
This time he shook his head. It wasn’t the first time he’d heard the same plea. The grip on his arms was becoming tighter and tighter, as if, if he held on even tighter it would stop him leaving, keep him there, keep them both routed to the spot and stop time, completely. Both knew they couldn’t stop time, that they couldn’t pause it, but both hoped fervently that it would magically stop. If only they could… but then they would be there for the rest of their lives, not wanting to move time and that wouldn’t give either of them anything. They wouldn’t be able to move on with anything then, and wouldn’t that defeat the point? They both knew it.
If they never let go now there would never be a future, never be a future for them, and they were relying on that.
This was just a small glitch in it all.
Time would pass, and then they would be standing on the other side, and it would all be alright. Wouldn’t it?
‘I love you.’ He whispered desperately, as if that would change anything, nothing but their longing to stay; there in that moment - actually not in that moment, if anywhere this wouldn’t be happening, they wouldn’t be there, saying goodbye.
They were still hanging onto each other; but what was the point, when they knew, it would only be minutes until they were separated, and for how long, they didn’t know.
The world was lost around them. They had only eyes for each other as they stood there, staring into each other’s eyes.
‘I really am sorry; you know that?’
The words were whispered and gentle; but words that still wouldn’t change anything. They were just words, words that had been repeated, over and over; not just by them, but by generations of humans, trying to make up for all their failings and mistakes, even when they couldn’t. They had to try.
Neither wanted to let go. They couldn’t. Neither wanted to say the words, to say goodbye.
‘I love you too, you know. Don’t you forget it.’
‘I won’t.’
‘It won’t be long, one day, I’ll be back here, with you.’
Their grip was loosening. They didn’t want it to, but it had to.
One of them opened his mouth to speak, to just say bye but he couldn’t get the word out.
‘See you soon, yeah?’ The other said; telling himself to let go. But it was so hard, too hard. Why did it have to be so hard?
Yet they couldn’t stay like that forever; their hands were slipping away, they were losing each other.
‘See you then.’ He agreed, trying to smile. But it was too hard. It was fake, this smiling, this pretending that it would be alright; because both of them knew, somehow, that maybe it wouldn’t. they just didn’t know.
They had to hope.
That’s all they had.
As the taller boy finally let go, and turned his back, walking away, saying goodbye, the smaller, fragile boy who was left standing there, finally let the tears he had been holding back roll down his face, as he watched his life walk away from him.
He was left, standing there, so alone. Never had he been so lost in this world, so separated, just by barriers and fate. Such simple things. Or were they? They complicated everything, and he couldn’t cope with that.
He wouldn’t be able to let go, ever.
This hope was all he had left.
He waited until every possibility of him coming back had passed, and he knew, really, that this was it. He had to walk away, and start again. If he didn’t try, he would be waiting a long time.
And then he turned and walked away.
Hope you know
I hope you know
In spite of everything this world has put us through
I loved you
And still do