Your BBs are the reason I wish Big Bang happened more than once a year, I swear to God. UGH, I don't know what it is about your writing that works the longfic format so well, but you always, always do, and Sam/Dean AU is entirely yours as a genre. I foresee myself rereading this as often as I have reread Crush, and that's saying something. ;)
This is amazing, hon. ♥ And now I'm going to be totally dead at work in the morning but I don't care because FIC.
Yes, this one was quite painful to write, and I agree that both boys are very flawed and destructive in this. IDK, I just didn't want to sugarcoat any of it.
That's... let's see, three hours later and I'm pretty sure I'll never have the words for how much I loved this. So much messed up love and obsession threading between them, and poor, poor Lester, stuck like a moth in that flame...
I understand what you mean by a bad taste in your mouth. I think that always happens when there's infidelity involved, and lets face it, as much as I love Sam/Dean, it's still incest, and like you say, moving them away from the unreality of hunting and angels and demons and all that, just makes the incest and their unhealthy obsession with each other (which I love!) come over as even more unhealthy. I definitely knew this wouldn't be everyone's cup of tea!
It's interesting that you see Dean as the one most at fault here, a lot of the other commentators are blaming Sam. But you're definitely right about Dean being fucked in the head, he's basically floundering around, reeling from his father's loss and never getting over the family being split up way back when. It is sad.
Thanks so much for reading & leaving such a thoughtful comment. I'm glad it sparked such emotions in you, even if they were negative!
Yes it is terribly surprising that in this fandom 99% of the people will read any given story and blame Sam, not Dean. And that was sarcasm ( a heaping tower of it)btw. Throw in the fact that you are very clearly a deangirl and i wonder how you can really be surprised at all. Minus the trademark obliviousness to reality that is part and parcel of being a deangirl apparently. Since the comments are assured to be a storm of dean-biased fans tiredly droning on about whether sam or dean is the most to blame in this story (spoiler alert-Sam will get all the blame regardless of what actually went down in reality, how marvelously like the show itself!) I have no interest in participating in these "discussions" further.
I'm sorry that you feel that way, and I have say that I am not in any way a dean!girl, or an anybody girl, I've never honestly preferred one brother over the other. I've always been all about the Sam/Dean relationship in all its fucked-up glory and I really hate the endless Sam vs. Dean arguments that go on.
It was really not my intention to blame either brother in this story but to just present things as they happen. I totally believe that both are to blame. Obviously, Dean is more in the wrong because he cheats on his husband and he is the first one to instigate things with Sam, Sam after all, is single and not cheating on anybody. But, I wanted to show that Dean was coming from a very mixed-up, grief-stricken place, so, although he does things wrong, we can maybe understand and sympathise with why he does them.
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Your BBs are the reason I wish Big Bang happened more than once a year, I swear to God. UGH, I don't know what it is about your writing that works the longfic format so well, but you always, always do, and Sam/Dean AU is entirely yours as a genre. I foresee myself rereading this as often as I have reread Crush, and that's saying something. ;)
This is amazing, hon. ♥ And now I'm going to be totally dead at work in the morning but I don't care because FIC.
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And you sexying is so hot. Wonderful job yet again.
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This story kind of broke my heart.
Good writing, bad Sam. Wow.
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Thank you for reading & commenting.
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It's interesting that you see Dean as the one most at fault here, a lot of the other commentators are blaming Sam. But you're definitely right about Dean being fucked in the head, he's basically floundering around, reeling from his father's loss and never getting over the family being split up way back when. It is sad.
Thanks so much for reading & leaving such a thoughtful comment. I'm glad it sparked such emotions in you, even if they were negative!
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It was really not my intention to blame either brother in this story but to just present things as they happen. I totally believe that both are to blame. Obviously, Dean is more in the wrong because he cheats on his husband and he is the first one to instigate things with Sam, Sam after all, is single and not cheating on anybody. But, I wanted to show that Dean was coming from a very mixed-up, grief-stricken place, so, although he does things wrong, we can maybe understand and sympathise with why he does them.
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