The Sandwitch, part 2
(Emma and Solies walk into Subway. They are charred.)
Solies: (clearly unhappy) "I'd like a 12-inch seafood salad sub with extra mayo, hot peppers, and pickles, please."
Chef: (blinks uncomprehendingly) "Uh, come again?"
Solies: "I'd like a 12-inch seafood salad sub with extra mayo, hot peppers, and pickles, please."
Emma: "It's not ours! We swear!"
Chef: "C-coming right up."
Guy standing in line #1: "Look at what he's making!"
Guy standing in line #2: "Dude, I think I'm gonna..." (runs away retching)
Chef: "Believe me, I'm as unhappy making it as you are looking at it. It's their fault."
Emma: "I'm telling you, It's not ours!"
Guy standing in line #3: "Suuuuuure."
(The chef holds the mayo bottle over the sandwich, seemingly unable to believe his eyes.)
Chef: "Extra mayo?"
Solies: "Extra mayo."
(The chef starts to squeeze the bottle. He stops.)
Chef: "You know, the seafood salad has a lot of mayo in it already. I mean, a lot."
Solies: "We know."
(The chef starts to squeeze the bottle. He stops.)
Chef: "Actually, there's very little seafood in it at all. The red chunks you see are artificial. It's essentially mayonnaise and mayonnaise byproducts."
Emma: "Sigh. We know. Just do it."
Chef: "Okay then." (starts squeezing) "Just let me know when... Yep, that's right. Just let me know when... I'll stop when you say... Uh, guys?"
Emma: "We'll tell you. We'll tell you."
(The chef sighs and goes back to his work. He empties the bottle.)
Emma: "That should do it."
(The chef wraps up the sandwich. He is green and unhappy.)
Chef: "Oh man. I can't believe I made that."
(Emma and Solies pay and get out of there as fast as they can. They deliver the sandwich to Jill at her desk, who gleefully unwraps it.)
Jill: "Thanks, guys!" (bite) "Mmmmmmmmmmm!" (mouth full) "Wamp fum?"
Emma and Solies: "Not even if you paid us."
Solies: (clearly unhappy) "I'd like a 12-inch seafood salad sub with extra mayo, hot peppers, and pickles, please."
Chef: (blinks uncomprehendingly) "Uh, come again?"
Solies: "I'd like a 12-inch seafood salad sub with extra mayo, hot peppers, and pickles, please."
Emma: "It's not ours! We swear!"
Chef: "C-coming right up."
Guy standing in line #1: "Look at what he's making!"
Guy standing in line #2: "Dude, I think I'm gonna..." (runs away retching)
Chef: "Believe me, I'm as unhappy making it as you are looking at it. It's their fault."
Emma: "I'm telling you, It's not ours!"
Guy standing in line #3: "Suuuuuure."
(The chef holds the mayo bottle over the sandwich, seemingly unable to believe his eyes.)
Chef: "Extra mayo?"
Solies: "Extra mayo."
(The chef starts to squeeze the bottle. He stops.)
Chef: "You know, the seafood salad has a lot of mayo in it already. I mean, a lot."
Solies: "We know."
(The chef starts to squeeze the bottle. He stops.)
Chef: "Actually, there's very little seafood in it at all. The red chunks you see are artificial. It's essentially mayonnaise and mayonnaise byproducts."
Emma: "Sigh. We know. Just do it."
Chef: "Okay then." (starts squeezing) "Just let me know when... Yep, that's right. Just let me know when... I'll stop when you say... Uh, guys?"
Emma: "We'll tell you. We'll tell you."
(The chef sighs and goes back to his work. He empties the bottle.)
Emma: "That should do it."
(The chef wraps up the sandwich. He is green and unhappy.)
Chef: "Oh man. I can't believe I made that."
(Emma and Solies pay and get out of there as fast as they can. They deliver the sandwich to Jill at her desk, who gleefully unwraps it.)
Jill: "Thanks, guys!" (bite) "Mmmmmmmmmmm!" (mouth full) "Wamp fum?"
Emma and Solies: "Not even if you paid us."