Fic: World Spins Madly On (11/?)
Chapter 11
“You don’t know what goes on in anyone’s life but your own. And when you mess with one part of a person’s life, you’re not messing with just that part. Unfortunately, you can’t be that precise and selective. When you mess with one part of a person’s life you’re messing with their entire life. Everything… affects everything.”
-Jay Asher-
Emily watched JJ closely as the younger woman entered the room after Ambassador Prentiss had left. Emily could see that JJ’s eyes had filled with worry and she frowned. Her mother must have said something to the younger woman, and Emily knew the likelihood of her getting JJ to spill was slim to none. Emily sighed inside. She needed to think.
“JJ,” she called out. The blonde raised her head with a questioning look and a tired smile on her face. “Did my mother say anything to you?”
JJ’s body grew tense at Emily’s question. Carefully, she put back the glass she had been drinking from on the table, and asked back, “What do you mean, Emily?” JJ knew Emily could sense a lie from a hundred miles away, but she really didn’t want to talk about what Ambassador Prentiss had said to her earlier.
The brunette couldn’t hide a sinister smirk. I knew it, she said. “Nothing,” she replied. “Forget about it.”
“Di... did your mother say anything to you?” JJ asked, feeling uncomfortable, yet a bit relieved that Emily didn’t push her to answer. Emily only smiled in response. JJ didn’t know what to do. “She did, didn’t she? What was it?”
Emily chuckled. “It isn’t fair, is it, JJ; you expect me to answer the questions that you are avoiding? And she is my mother, of course she would say things,” the woman replied, watching JJ’s reaction. When the younger woman turned away to avoid Emily’s gaze, she continued, “I know about the public apology thing, just so you know. I was wondering when you were going to tell me about it.”
“Emily, I...” JJ began, but the taller woman cut her off.
“It’s okay, JJ. I understand. And you don’t have to worry about it, I’ll take care of it,” the brunette said. They looked at each other, feeling further apart than they had ever felt before. JJ nodded, not knowing what to say. She said something about going to the office and would be back in a couple of hours. Emily stiffened when JJ leaned in and planted a small kiss on her cheek. Before she could react, JJ had left the room.
***
Location: FBI: BAU
“Agent Jareau,” a firm voice greeted JJ the moment she stepped out of the lift. The blonde looked up and saw Section Chief Erin Strauss standing in front of her office, motioning JJ towards herself.
JJ sighed. Talking with Strauss when she was tired and confused was the last thing she needed. But how could she say no to the boss of her boss? Hotch’s team had been a pain for Strauss and JJ didn’t want to make everything worse. She followed the older woman to her office, closing the door behind her, and stood awkwardly in the middle of the office.
She was surprised to see there were several other people inside Strauss’ office. She recognized all but one - they were other section chiefs and assistant directors. This must have been serious.
“Have a seat, Agent Jareau,” Strauss commanded. JJ muttered a thank you and grabbed a chair closest to where she was standing. Before JJ was even fully seated, the section chief had begun to speak again, “This is Matthew Stevenson; he is Ambassador Prentiss’ secretary. He has a message from the Ambassador.”
JJ frowned. Elizabeth Prentiss hadn’t said anything about sending her secretary to the office when they had met earlier in the hospital. The politician had only warned her to think before speaking to avoid more damage. Was this going to be the ‘damage’ she had mentioned? She glanced at the other agents around and somehow felt worried to see how relaxed their faces were.
“Agent Jareau, Ambassador Prentiss would like to inform you that she has taken back the demand of the public apology,” the young man, Stevenson, said. “There will be no legal actions taken and this event never happened in her memory.” He smiled at JJ.
JJ didn’t smile back. She felt chill down her spine as she heard those words. Emily’s words in the hospital were ringing in her ears. “Don’t worry... I’ll take care of it.” JJ swallowed hard. She glared at the Ambassador’s secretary. “And what does the Ambassador want in return?” she asked.
Section Chief Strauss cut her off before JJ could say another word, “That is very inappropriate of you, Agent Jareau!” she said. “Ambassador Prentiss is a highly respectable woman and she will never want anything in return. You are very lucky she didn’t pursue this matter and take it to court.”
Stevenson looked sheepishly at JJ and she knew that her words had hit the right spot. JJ didn’t say anything else. She was dismissed and she left Strauss’ office. JJ went to Hotch’s office straight away only to see that the unit chief wasn’t in his office.
“JJ? Is something wrong?” Rossi called her out from his own office. He knew something wasn’t right when JJ turned around and looked at him desperately. He asked her to come into his office. “What happened?”
JJ shook her head. “I... actually don’t know,” she said. She told Rossi about Strauss’ earlier call to ask her to make the public apology then the Ambassador’s visit to the hospital, and Emily’s weird reaction after the visit. Then she told the senior agent about the meeting with Strauss and the Ambassador’s secretary telling her that she need not make the public apology. She rambled on and Rossi let her. When she had finished, she looked at Rossi confusedly. “I don’t understand,” she said.
Rossi understood. And he knew that JJ understood, too. The woman just didn’t want to admit that she understood everything - Rossi knew that JJ didn’t want to accept that Emily had ‘protected’ her. He patted JJ on the shoulder. Nothing Rossi could say that would be able to make JJ feel better, so the man didn’t even try.
***
Location: Potomac Hospital
Emily had just finished changing into her clothes when her phone rang. She glanced over to see who was calling, hoping that it wasn’t JJ or anyone from the team. When she saw the name of the caller, she sighed.
“I’m ready, Mother,” Emily said. She listened for a respond then continued, “No, you don’t have to send your men upstairs, I can walk perfectly on my own. I have broken ribs, for god’s sake, not a broken leg.” Emily ended the phone call and threw the phone onto the hospital bed. “Damn,” she swore as pain shot through her broken ribs. She bent over and vomited on the floor. She totally forgot that she was hurt. The tall woman reached for the call button and pressed it hard until a nurse came running.
The nurse tried to help her back onto the bed, but Emily refused. She asked for a wheelchair. The nurse looked at her disbelievingly. “You are not to leave before the doctor checks you out!” she said firmly. Emily glared at the woman and tried to stand up herself. “Ma’am, we need to have you examined first!”
“Just get me the damn wheelchair. My mother and her doctor are waiting downstairs,” Emily spat angrily. She was lying about the doctor but the nurse seemed to calm down a little. She left the room and got a wheelchair, insisting on pushing Emily downstairs. “Yeah, whatever floats your boat,” the brunette said sarcastically.
Ambassador Prentiss was waiting in the car with a displeased look when Emily finally got into the car. “It took you approximately twenty minutes to travel from the third floor in a wheelchair,” were her first words.
Emily looked at her indifferently. “My ribs hurt like hell, and in case you don’t remember, I haven’t been cleared to leave my bed,” she said. The Ambassador didn’t reply. They sat in silence for a moment. Emily finally broke the silence. “Have you taken back your stupid demand?” she asked.
Elizabeth Prentiss eyed her daughter carefully. She could see how angry and irritated Emily was and she knew she had won. “Have you written the letter?” the older woman asked back, holding out her hand to her daughter, hoping to get something. Emily nodded. She reached for her back pocket and drew out a folded piece of paper. The young agent practically threw the piece of paper towards the Ambassador, who was now smiling triumphantly. “Yes, I have taken back my request. I’m glad I could talk some sense into you, Emily.”
The Ambassador watched as tears filled up Emily’s eyes and she was a little taken aback to see it. Emily’s voice was cracking up when she hissed, “Screw you.” Elizabeth couldn’t remember when the last time she had seen her only daughter shed a tear; Emily had never cried in front of other people before - even when she was little, young Emily would show nothing to the world. A tingle of guilty feeling rose in Elizabeth’s heart but she swallowed it. The girl is in pain, she made an excuse to herself, of course she can’t control her emotions well right now.
Emily looked away, avoiding her mother’s gaze. She swallowed back her tears, repeating the very words she always said to herself when she was about to lose it since she was little. There will be a time for it later, Emily. Chin up now, everything is going to be okay. So Emily Prentiss took a deep breath and composed herself. When the car stopped in front of the Ambassador residence, Emily Prentiss looked nothing less than perfect.
***
Location: JJ’s house
Time: Two days after Emily left with Ambassador Prentiss
“JJ, you have to stop blaming yourself!” Garcia said, almost desperately to a curled up figure in bed. “You can’t spend your time just lying there in bed and crying! It won’t do you any good - it won’t bring Emily back! She decided to quit, so be it! Maybe she’s just tired of working in the field, or... or maybe she is still scared of what happened to her. It’s not your fault at all!”
The younger woman growled back at the mention of Emily’s quitting. “Don’t you dare bad-mouth her decision! She wouldn’t have quit if it weren’t for me!” JJ shouted. New tears were now streaming down her cheeks. “You know nothing about it, so shut up!”
Garcia looked at her friend helplessly. JJ was so pale, and sad, and Garcia couldn’t help but feel for the younger woman. She took JJ into her arms and held the woman there until her sobs subsided. “Ssshh ...It’s okay, JJ. It’s okay,” she whispered into JJ’s hair. “Everything is going to be okay.”
JJ calmed down a little after a few minutes. She told Garcia what she knew to be the truth behind Emily’s resignation. Hotch had informed the team that Emily was requesting transfer from the field office for personal problems. Everyone knew it was a lie - they thought Emily wasn’t ready to be back yet; and when Hotch had informed them further that Emily had really resigned from the FBI, they felt so betrayed. They had thought Emily wanted to avoid them, ashamed of being ‘victimized’. The news about Emily’s resignation had really diverted them from the fact that JJ didn’t have to make the public apology - no one remembered it, no one mentioned it. And JJ felt so guilty for not telling them the truth.
“Are you sure that Emily resigned in exchange for her mother taking back her demand?” Garcia asked. It all started to make sense but she still couldn’t believe it. Why would someone like Emily want to give up her dream job only to prevent a simple public apology? Garcia really couldn’t understand. She knew JJ would be greatly humiliated if the press liaison made the apology, but that was it - a onetime interoffice gossip. JJ wouldn’t be affected much by it.
“A public apology would destroy my career, Garcia, and Emily knew that perfectly,” JJ answered Garcia’s unvoiced question. “She knew that I would never be able to leave it behind me - and she knew that my family would never let me forget,” she said with a hint of sadness in her voice. She looked up and met Garcia’s blue eyes. “You know,” the blonde said to her friend, her voice started to crack up again. “I would give anything to talk to Emily right now. I miss her so bad it hurts.”
Garcia was at a loss of words. There was something in JJ’s words that hinted a deeper meaning, and the woman could see that JJ herself didn’t know how her last sentence had sounded. She contemplated her choice of words before finally suggested, “Then do something to bring her back and tell her how she has made you feel all the while.”
JJ gave her friend a sad smile. “If I could do it, do you think I would still be here talking to you?” she said. The blonde lay back down on her bed, clutching her pillow. “You know, there might be something I can do.”
“And what is that?” Garcia asked carefully, hoping that JJ’s ideas wouldn’t involve her getting hurt.
“Emily is dead stubborn - I won’t be able to meet her even if I beg and cry. But,” JJ began, her eyes gleaming with excitement, “but if I make her angry, there is a chance that she will come back. Great. I’ll just do it.” She leaped off her bed and grabbed her phone. JJ dialled one of her speed-dial numbers and waited for the other line to connect.
“What?” the tech goddess asked. “JJ? What are you planning to do?”
JJ ignored the shorter woman completely. “Hotch,” she said the moment the other line picked up. “Please set up my meeting with Sara Mendell. Yes, I’m going to talk to her.”
“Sometimes you have to do what you don’t like to get to where you want to be.”
-Tori Amos-