Advice needed

Apr 29, 2007 15:49

I know that enough of you have to deal with the loss of a friend or loved one due to cancer, so I'm asking you all for advice ( Read more... )

judy, cancer, loss, friends

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Comments 8

pinkfu April 30 2007, 00:18:05 UTC
Maybe gift certificates at places with nice linens/pillows, etc. When a good friend was going she figured if you have to be in bed and at home all the time, it might as well be a fluffy, comfy and beautiful place. She also liked flowering potted plants. Nothing with too strong of a smell, but pretty and bright flowers.

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heidinoel April 30 2007, 14:17:31 UTC
i would say nothing. gifts only reminds someone they are sick.

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sweetcheri April 30 2007, 15:24:02 UTC
Your comment makes me strongly believe that you have never dealt with someone close to you who has had cancer. I have been through cancer with more close family than I can count on both hands. Giving them a gift does not remind them that they're sick. It reminds them that they are loved and that you took the extra time to give them something to make them feel special. But then again, I come from a family where we do little things for each other throughout the year just to show someone we're thinking of them. It's called caring.

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penny246 April 30 2007, 00:42:51 UTC
I like the idea... give them something they can enjoy while she is still getting around.

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Thanks... snaxxx April 30 2007, 00:50:32 UTC
*hugs*

All good recommendations - sweetcheri made a couple of good points elsewhere, by reminding me that often Judy is awake all night. She suggested a gift card for a video rental place, or if I buy movies some comedies.

I need to talk to our HR folks about a Health and Wellness session, to get us some group discussions on getting through this - when Robin passed away from cancer, it was devastating to our office. Robin had been the first and loudest person to tell me that I could not only attempt the Danskin triathlon, but that I would finish it.

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thank you! snaxxx April 30 2007, 02:03:30 UTC
great idea, except that I suspect that any time Judy can actually concentrate, she'll probably want to work on a couple of papers or the book she's been writing.

I don't know how far she's gotten, but her big project is on The 1900 Storm, a hurricane that hit Galveston, Texas. It was an event that debilitated the town, and resulted in a shift from there to Houston as the major seaport for Texas Gulf Coast region.

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Re: thank you! decibel45 April 30 2007, 23:00:51 UTC
Do you know anyone in UT's literary department? Perhaps there's someone that could help her complete her project. Depending on what kind of help she needs with it, a website could be a killer idea too; I'm sure she'd get lots of folks wanting to help.

If it were me, I'd be very comforted by leaving a permanent legacy behind.

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cutiepie74 April 30 2007, 03:22:12 UTC
A couple of years ago, my graduate adviser at UT was diagnosed with colon cancer and it was very unexpected and he required surgery shortly thereafter. I was in one of these positions, not knowing what to get. I bought some Calvin and Hobbes books because I remember that being the only thing that could make me smile when I was in a major depression.

I know Cafe Monet has a little package you can pick out for sick friends, etc.

Best wishes to you and your friends.

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