Fic: True and Total (Sam/Dean, J2, G) part 1 of 2
Title: True and Total
Author: smalltrolven
Giftee: cassiopeia7
Pairing: Sam/Dean, Jensen/Jared from French Mistake
Wordcount: 3,667
Rating: G
Warnings: None
Author’s Note: Not my characters, only my words. Written for cassiopeia7 for their great prompts for the spn-j2-xmas 2019. Dean is playing Taylor Swift’s “Christmas Tree Farm” on Sam’s phone.
Summary: While on a case, Sam and Dean make a promise in their dreams to meet Jensen and Jared in the woods. It’s a holiday miracle or something…or maybe it’s part of the case. A dream or wish fulfilled. Promises kept in the lovely, dark, and deep woods.
Read it over on AO3 right here.
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It was cold.
No-She was cold. Cold as ice…Ice ice baby.
No, not just cold, She was cold hard truth.
That’s what she demanded as her due.
She wanted it from him, from all of them.
The barest, coldest, deepest buried, most honest truth.
They had all been dreaming of this, promising one another they would meet here in the snowy forest. She had caused this to be, She had brought them together, from their two different worlds for the truth telling to begin.
And so it was that all four of them had each told the truth that they’d been hiding for years.
They had each bared it all to the one person they’d been working so hard at hiding it from.
That was what She had required as her due.
And by all of them doing what She’d demanded, they’d saved each other.
She was gone now and so they…had to…had to…
All they had to do now was to get themselves out of this snow-covered forest and find their freaking cars. All four of them blinked at each other across the small clearing in dumb-struck amazement to still be alive. To be left unfrozen. Their honesty had been enough for Her. But it was likely too much for them.
Before Sam or Dean could issue any marching orders about getting away from the scene of the near-crime, Jared turned to Jensen and looked at him in what looked like an impending panic attack.
“Hold on, hold on, everything we just said…you mean this is something we can…we can actually have, for real? Not just in like…you know, our dreams?” Jared asked, gulping in air frantically.
“For real, yeah, oh hell yeah, for real,” Jensen said, nodding just as frantically.
“Starting when exactly?” Jared asked, taking one last breath in and holding it.
“Always with the damn questions, Jared. Starting right now if you want,” Jensen said, taking a final step towards Jared.
Jared smiled so wide, it looked like the sun had dawned in the moonlit forest glade. Jensen returned the smile and then reached up to pull Jared down into a kiss. It seemed to be chaste at first and then Jared’s hands were on Jensen’s face moving it and holding it just so while they traded deeper and deeper kisses until it seemed to be just one long kiss.
Sam wondered how either of the guys were even breathing. It was one hundred kinds of strange to see these two men who looked just like he and his brother making out like their lives depended on it. Maybe it felt like it did to them. He glanced over at Dean who was paying rapt attention, it may as well have been one of his favorite porn videos. Dean’s eyes flicked up to meet Sam’s and he had this look on his face that Sam struggled to quantify.
“You okay, Dean?” Sam whispered, not wanting to interrupt the other two.
Dean nodded and the strange look on his face was replaced by an eye roll that said it all. He tipped his head towards the pair that seemed to be slowing down their frenzied kissing. Sam could tell Dean probably wanted to get the hell away from this, or just to stop seeing it happen-this was what they could have if they ever let themselves go there. If they let themselves act on the honest words they’d just spoken.
Sam cleared his throat a couple times to interrupt all four of them. He didn’t want to get into it with Dean here, and he couldn’t watch them for much longer without grabbing Dean and planting one on him. The two men stopped kissing and turned towards him, their arms still around each other.
“Sorry, for uh…doing that in front of you like that. Guess we couldn’t wait any longer,” Jared said, his arm tightening around Jensen’s waist.
“Yeah, fifteen years was long enough,” Jensen said, looking up at Jared to see his reaction.
“This is great for you guys, I’m really happy for you,” Sam said.
“What about you two though?” Jared asked. “Wasn’t it supposed to do the same thing for you, all this truth telling? That’s what She said, right?”
“We’re…uh, we’re brothers,” Sam said.
“And?” Jared and Jensen asked in unison.
“Dude, you ever heard of a little thing called incest?” Dean asked with one raised eyebrow.
“Listen, if your lives have been anything like what we’ve been playing out on the TV show, then in my opinion, you deserve whatever happiness you can find with each other,” Jensen said.
“Besides, you’re soulmates, remember?” Jared said. “I mean, if that’s a thing that really is true here to you and wasn’t just on our show.”
“No, we’re uh…yeah, we’re soulmates,” Sam said.
Dean just looked at him and rolled his eyes. “Like that’s ever done us any fucking good.”
“Dean, c’mon that’s not a bad thing,” Jensen said, “if anything, it’s like your secret weapon, it’s the thing that’s helped you guys win every single time.”
“How in the hell would you know?” Dean snarked, crossing his arms over his chest.
“I’ve been playing you for fifteen years, dude. I think I know a thing or two about soulmates,” Jensen said.
“Let’s just get out of here, my feet are freezing off,” Dean said, stomping away back towards the lights of civilization.
There wasn’t even a long walk back to the car to work things out because they were all whisked back to the place from where they’d started. Just like in the dreams they’d all had of each other, where they’d promised to come to the woods and meet and then-boom-they were there. Sam guessed She wasn’t really gone away all that far as they’d assumed.
Jared and Jensen shook Sam and Dean’s hands and they wished each other good luck for whatever came next. The two actors piled into their rental car, a shiny black convertible Mustang. It looked so small next to the Impala.
Jared yelled “Hey! Merry Christmas, y’all!” as they drove off, the car disappeared well before it should have, which meant it was likely gone back into their own world. He was glad he didn’t have to try and figure out how to get them there, because they certainly wouldn’t have known what to do with themselves here in this world. He chuckled at the idea of them going to Hollywood and pitching that the story in Chuck’s books be made into a TV series for them to star in, like that’d ever have a chance in hell of happening.
Sam climbed into the Impala and looked over at Dean. His hands were white-knuckling the steering wheel. “Let’s just go, huh?” Sam said in what he thought of as his most soothing voice. He didn’t want to push Dean at this point, it seemed unwise given the hard set of his jaw.
“We’re soulmates, Sammy,” Dean said instead of turning on the car and zooming off like Sam had expected. His voice held a childlike wonder as well as that familiar matter-of-factness Dean usually used to communicate important things like this.
Sam turned in his seat, one leg curled up on the seat to look at his brother more closely. Dean was practically vibrating, still gripping the steering wheel so tightly it looked painful. Sam reached out and put a hand over Dean’s, he gently stroked the back of Dean’s hand until it relaxed. “Yeah, we are, Dean.”
Dean’s hand turned palm up, and Sam interlaced their fingers.
“Let’s go home,” Dean said. He didn’t need to speak any other words, because he kept holding Sam’s hand, and Sam knew right then, that it was all going to be different from here on out. It wasn’t going to be easy though, not like it had been for Jared and Jensen, the lucky bastards.
Home meant, for the moment, The Lazy Owl, the motel they were staying at nearby. The giant neon owl’s eyes blinked merrily at them as they pulled into the almost empty parking lot, competing for visual attention with the Christmas lights lining each and every window. It was relentlessly cheery, an annoying reminder of how far from normal they were this year. Declaring their soulmate status to one another, saving their doubles from another world, it was not exactly the standard Hallmark Christmas Eve. But then it never had been, why start now?
Dean parked in front of their room and switched off the engine and then the headlights. After a long moment where he seemed about to say something, he finally let go of Sam’s hand. It felt reluctant the way Dean slowly unlaced their fingers, dragging his own fingers across Sam’s palm. At least Sam hoped that it was.
After they got into their room it was another story. Dean seemed like he was folding in on himself, throwing up the usual walls, barricading himself in with all the worry about what they’d said to each other out there in the forest tonight. It had all seemed so easy as the words came pouring out, all the truth they never told, every last bit of the ugly and the beautiful laying right there in front of them. Sam knew better than to try and force his brother to talk. It had already happened once that night, and Dean was obviously not in the mood for any more truth-telling.
According to his phone, it was 3:30 AM, way too late to deal coherently with Dean’s hesitations and issues. He kicked off his wet boots and socks by the door and fell into bed, turning away from Dean to give him the space he obviously needed. Sam fell asleep in an instant, not even enough time to pray to remember it all in the morning, but then She’d promised them…
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To Part 2