|| OUT OF THE PAN AND INTO THE FIRE! || KNEE REPLACEMENT SURGERY ||
I haven't talked about this (at least not much) on LJ lately, because I felt there was nothing I could do about my constant and annoying knee pain, so why bother? It's deteriorated over the past six months, particularly in the past two months. Right now I am almost completely debilitated due to the deterioration of cartilage in my right knee. I'm having trouble walking, so much trouble it's to the point where DH is having to do the grocery shopping and a few other things that I've always done because I can't walk long or far enough to complete the task. I'm pretty much in constant pain; I had to go back to pain management, a step I said to myself that I would never do. Previously, they had me on an extremely high dose of percocet and morphine, which brought along a plethora of side effects. I had to tell my pain doctor that I didn't want to hurt anymore, but that I was also unwilling to take hardcore narcotics. So here's the regimen they have me on: stretching and yoga (honestly, I do the stretching; I did the yoga a few times, but my balance is terrible -- I spend so much time trying to figure out the position and how to hold it without braining myself that I don't think it's really a true yoga workout. But stretching is something I'm good at. Anyway.), a low dose of Vicodin (10//325), and a specially formulated NSAID gel that I apply topically 3-4x per day. The gel is especially neat. Because I've had gastric bypass surgery in the past, I'm no longer allowed to have NSAIDs, like Advil, aspirin, Alleve, etc, because it can cause internal bleeding (and some of you may remember that I had a serious GI bleed back in 2008 due to ibuprophen use), but this gel is an NSAID, but it totally bypasses the guts, eliminating the risk of an NSAID-induced bleed. Here's what it's called on the bottle: Keta/Cyclo/Diclo/Gaba/Orphen/Tetra. Not exactly an easy name to remember. But I have to get this gel through a compounding pharmacy, which mixes up special order medications for patients who need a medication that a regular pharmacy doesn't carry. It's very convenient -- I have refills until November, so when I need a new tube of gel, I just call in a refill request, they fill it, and then send it to my house via UPS. I also have Lidocaine patches, which do a pretty good job of numbing the immediate area and kind of taking the edge of the severe pain.
But really my point is that I don't want to be on pain management anymore. I don't want to be in pain anymore. I want to regain full mobility and use of my right leg. I had wanted to take off some weight before going under the knife again, but weight loss requires exercise, and exercise requires mobility. I'm in this vicious cycle of wanting to lose some poundage, but being practically non-ambulatory. I almost feel housebound, and that's not me. I'm no shut-in. I like engaging in life and going places, seeing things, taking care of business, but I've been stuck in this cycle.
So I decided that I had to do something to break the cycle, and I decided on going forward with a full knee replacement. ASAP. My surgery is scheduled for August 19th, so just a month from now.
I'm pretty terrified. Guys, a full knee replacement is so, so frickin' painful. I had a terrible time with my first knee replacement back in 2010 and ended up in a rehabilitative hospital for two weeks following the procedure. I'm so scared this will happen again. It was really traumatic. I keep telling myself, though, that despite the worst case scenario happening to me with my first, I still made it through and it was ultimately a success! And it was worth the pain I endured. I think it's natural to dread something that you know is absolutely, 100% going to hurt. I'm trying to focus on the other side of the surgery, the part where the actual procedure is done and over with, and I'm working on physical therapy and regaining my mobility day by day.
Anyhow, yes, August 19th. Full knee replacement.
Next up: Fun with metal detectors! ;)
But really my point is that I don't want to be on pain management anymore. I don't want to be in pain anymore. I want to regain full mobility and use of my right leg. I had wanted to take off some weight before going under the knife again, but weight loss requires exercise, and exercise requires mobility. I'm in this vicious cycle of wanting to lose some poundage, but being practically non-ambulatory. I almost feel housebound, and that's not me. I'm no shut-in. I like engaging in life and going places, seeing things, taking care of business, but I've been stuck in this cycle.
So I decided that I had to do something to break the cycle, and I decided on going forward with a full knee replacement. ASAP. My surgery is scheduled for August 19th, so just a month from now.
I'm pretty terrified. Guys, a full knee replacement is so, so frickin' painful. I had a terrible time with my first knee replacement back in 2010 and ended up in a rehabilitative hospital for two weeks following the procedure. I'm so scared this will happen again. It was really traumatic. I keep telling myself, though, that despite the worst case scenario happening to me with my first, I still made it through and it was ultimately a success! And it was worth the pain I endured. I think it's natural to dread something that you know is absolutely, 100% going to hurt. I'm trying to focus on the other side of the surgery, the part where the actual procedure is done and over with, and I'm working on physical therapy and regaining my mobility day by day.
Anyhow, yes, August 19th. Full knee replacement.
Next up: Fun with metal detectors! ;)